Disclaimer: These characters are all Meg Cabot's, not mine.
I woke up in the middle of the night, to see moonlight streaming into my room. It cast an eerie glow on everything, making even my innocent clock look menacing.
I sat up, wondering what had woken me up. I felt chilly, and I rubbed my arms as I looked slowly and carefully around the room.
Maybe it was just my imagination. That was one thing that had been acting up, lately. Paul told me… well, I can remember it very clearly. It was yesterday, after all. It was after school, as per our agreement.
It was the first time I had gone to his house, since the day when I found my escape blocked by a hells angel and having to walk home in my blistered feet. And since we made the agreement. Little did I know that the "agreement" between Paul and me would soon be broken.
When we were up in his room, I was a bit more cautious this time.
We were looking over those stupid papers again. You know, the ones with the newspaper clippings about shifters. We were arguing, once again, about mediators and shifters.
"Come on, Suze, you know you're different." His eyes looked sort of bright as he leaned towards me. "You know, just like I do, that you're more. Something better. We both are."
"Paul, I don't know that. How do you know that? You said yourself you didn't sign up for this. Nobody taught you how to do it." I knew that was a really stupid point, but I was mad by then.
He put his hand over my mouth. "Let's not argue. That's not why you came over."
He leaned over, and in one swift movement, took his hand away, and put his lips there instead.
Alright, I have to say, I thought I would be more ready for this than the last time it happened. And I was just starting to go limp, when a face popped into m head.
It was Jesse's. It was him, petting that stupid cat on my window seat. It was him laughing at me while I hid in Doc's bed. It was him staring at the roses, the roses Paul sent to me. And then there we were again, at his grave, him telling me he didn't want to leave …and all of the sudden, I came to my senses.
I yanked out of Paul's embrace, which had deepened to a French version as I had been preoccupied. I guess I had been a little rougher than I thought, because when I yanked out of that embrace, Paul said, "Ouch! Now I KNOW that's not supposed to go there!"
I blushed, even though it was totally his fault. "What is wrong with you?" I said angrily at him.
"What's wrong with me?" he asked incredulously. "You're the one who keeps on pulling away, when you really don't want to." He said, then sarcastically, "And I wonder what's keeping you from doing anything remotely normal?"
"Um, how about the fact that I can speak to the dead?" I said, wanting to punch his stupid perfect face in.
"No, I'll tell you how; Jesse. Suze, how many times do I have to tell you? You guys have no future. Not only because he's a ghost, but think about it. He'd rather move to the rectory than live with you." He stopped, then looked sorry.
I guess he expected me to start sobbing hysterically. But I didn't. I knew that he was wrong. I knew for sure. So I smiled and shook my head.
Which infuriated Paul. "I can make your boyfriend disappear."
With that, I stopped smiling.
He told me how he could make it so that Jesse never died. It would be good for Jesse, to live out his life. It would be bad for me. I needed Jesse. Paul had the power to make it so he never met me. I probably did, too. It would be selfish of me to keep something like that from Jesse.
So now, knowing the powers with which Paul was born with, -and could use for evil- and the choice I had to make, I was awake for the second night in a row.
I got out of my bed, and went to the window seat and sat down. Looking out, I saw the moon was full, and I could see into the distance where it reflected off the ocean. Even though it was beautiful, it also chilled me to the bone. Because, somehow, I knew it was an omen. There was going to be trouble. And I didn't know who was going to save me now.