Author's Note: Damn this writer's block!! It's only the second week of
summer and my brain's already fried...actually, it's been fried since after
Christmas break....sorry about the seriousness of the last chapter, and
this one has some seriousness in it too. There are some funny parts in
here....I think....but it's short, which is either a good or bad thing.
Hmm, interesting.
Disclaimer: I don't own LoD. Well, technically, I own a copy of the game LoD, but you know what I mean
Chapter 16: There Goes My Sanity, Floating Away with the Rocks
(At the entrance to the Valley of Corrupted Sanity)
Guard: Can I help you folks?
Wesley and Me: Oh god not another one....
Ania: You two DON'T SAY A THING
Boberto: Could you open the gate for us? We have a pass from the King here *hands him the pass*
Guard: *examines the pass* It seems to be in order...ok -- HEY JOE!! OPEN THE GATE!!
Other Guard (Joe): It's always gotta be about YOU! Maybe I DON'T like to be ordered around while your lazy ass is down there drinking coffee!!
Guard: Will you just open the damn gate?! *To us* Sorry, he has some issues
All: *raised eyebrow*
Joe: Well, if you're gunna take that tone with me...
Ania: I'll take care of this --
All: NO!
Timoty: What did we say bout your "negotation" skills?!
Ania: *death glare*
Guard: Um, I could just go up there and --
Me: Don't bother, I can handle this -- HEY JOE *draws sword* You want us to drive the Eastsiders out of Tiberoa, YES?!
Joe: Uh...yeah
Me: *gesturing with my sword* THEN DON'T MAKE ME COME UP THERE AND OPEN THE GATE MYSELF!!! You won't like me when I get irritated.
Wesley: Which is ALL THE TIME
Joe: Geez, all you had to do was ask...*opens the gate*
All: *growls*
Guard: Uh...I would say "be careful folks" but it seems like you guys have a good bodyguard there...
Wesley: *whispers to the guard* She's more a curse than a blessing
Me: You wanna say that to my face, Wesley?! *Points sword in his direction*
Wesley: No ma'am
Me: Uh, huh *sheaths sword*
~ ~ ~
(We enter the Valley of Corrupted Gravity to find chunks of rocks floating in the multi-colored air and huge trees with their roots exposed. Yet, we are planting firmly to the ground)
Boberto: Why is that?
Nikole: OOH!! I bet I can fly here!! Watch me! *jumps off the side of the cliff*
All: OMG NIKOLE!!!
Nikole: *laughs, and remerges on a rock floating upward toward us* You guys worry too much....just because I wear a tutu and have become an instant blond, doesn't mean I'm stupid enough to jump to my death!!
All: DON'T DO THAT AGAIN!!!
Ania: So what do you think happened here?
Me: It's obvious -- the great magical clash of Winglies and Dragoons threw off the balance of nature in this valley and caused the gravity to become warped.
Ania: Thanks, smart ass.
Me: Your welcome
(The Valley of Corrupted Gravity is not one of my favorite places -- it's very annoying to maneuver. You go upside down, sideways, forwards, backwards, down, up -- )
Me: I think I'm gunna be sick...
(Don't worry, I see a save point up ahead)
Nikole, Boberto, Timoty: WTF IS THAT?! *Points to a statue inbedded in the stone*
Ania: Oh god...*covers head* It's calling me again....
Me: Another Virage....and this one isn't missing any body parts, either
Nikole: What's a Virage?
Me: God, not another explanation -- okay, well ya know how the Humans used Dragoons in the Dragon Campaign? Well, the Winglies --
Ania: We don't have time! This one's mad *ground rumbles* AND awake! We hafta retreat!
Welsey: *draws sword* I don't think we have a choice
*Screen dissolves, battle begins*
(Just because this Virage is fully assembled, don't let it intimate you! Just attack the head, and it'll be dead [oo! That rhymes!]. Although this Virage has more potent attacks than the one in the Volcano Villude. One of them is one of those "can't combant" attacks, which automatically kills one of your characters -- dammit, I hate that attack!! Another attack the Virage likes is to confuse, frighten, and/or bewitch all of your players at the same time, so really all you can do is watch as the Dragoons guard, attack themselves and each other, and try to run away until the ailments expire in three turns or so)
[Nice teamwork, guys]
(Of course, the actual battle isn't important -- it's the post battle that counts)
Wesley: *end-of-battle-Dart-move* Okay, I think it's dead, let's go
[You always seem to speak too soon, don't you?]
Wesley: What does that mean?
Virage: *wakes up and lunges for Ania*
All: WHY DON'T THESE THING EVER DIE?!?!?!
Wesley: Ania, look out!!
(Like in the Limestone Cave, Ania unwillingly emulates a blue beam from her body and a large insignia appears on her forehead. This forces the Virage off the edge of the cliff, falling to his doom while hitting his head on a couple of floating rocks)
Nikole: Well that was strange
Wesley: That's like the second time you've done that!
Ania: I know! I know!
Me: Ania, what are you to Virage?
Ania: I don't know!
Timoty: So first you know, and now you don't?
Ania: I guess....*sigh* There goes my sanity, floating away with the rocks...
Me: You got THAT right
~ ~ ~
Wesley: Okay, we should reach the Eastsider's lair in no time at all -- wait a minute, where's the rest of the valley?
All: *jaws drop*
Nikole: You mean, we crossed that ENTIRE valley and the gang's hideout isn't even HERE?!
Wesley: It, uh, looks like it
All: *collapses to the ground, Anime style*
Me: Wesley, maybe you shouldn't talk at all -- I mean, whatever comes out of your mouth is either the direct OPPOSITE of what's really going on, repeating someone else's EXACT words, or an overly obvious phrase!!
Wesley: Well, if I became a mute, then who would you have to torture?
Me: Don't you try that with me, mister!
Wesley: hehehe
Disclaimer: I don't own LoD. Well, technically, I own a copy of the game LoD, but you know what I mean
Chapter 16: There Goes My Sanity, Floating Away with the Rocks
(At the entrance to the Valley of Corrupted Sanity)
Guard: Can I help you folks?
Wesley and Me: Oh god not another one....
Ania: You two DON'T SAY A THING
Boberto: Could you open the gate for us? We have a pass from the King here *hands him the pass*
Guard: *examines the pass* It seems to be in order...ok -- HEY JOE!! OPEN THE GATE!!
Other Guard (Joe): It's always gotta be about YOU! Maybe I DON'T like to be ordered around while your lazy ass is down there drinking coffee!!
Guard: Will you just open the damn gate?! *To us* Sorry, he has some issues
All: *raised eyebrow*
Joe: Well, if you're gunna take that tone with me...
Ania: I'll take care of this --
All: NO!
Timoty: What did we say bout your "negotation" skills?!
Ania: *death glare*
Guard: Um, I could just go up there and --
Me: Don't bother, I can handle this -- HEY JOE *draws sword* You want us to drive the Eastsiders out of Tiberoa, YES?!
Joe: Uh...yeah
Me: *gesturing with my sword* THEN DON'T MAKE ME COME UP THERE AND OPEN THE GATE MYSELF!!! You won't like me when I get irritated.
Wesley: Which is ALL THE TIME
Joe: Geez, all you had to do was ask...*opens the gate*
All: *growls*
Guard: Uh...I would say "be careful folks" but it seems like you guys have a good bodyguard there...
Wesley: *whispers to the guard* She's more a curse than a blessing
Me: You wanna say that to my face, Wesley?! *Points sword in his direction*
Wesley: No ma'am
Me: Uh, huh *sheaths sword*
~ ~ ~
(We enter the Valley of Corrupted Gravity to find chunks of rocks floating in the multi-colored air and huge trees with their roots exposed. Yet, we are planting firmly to the ground)
Boberto: Why is that?
Nikole: OOH!! I bet I can fly here!! Watch me! *jumps off the side of the cliff*
All: OMG NIKOLE!!!
Nikole: *laughs, and remerges on a rock floating upward toward us* You guys worry too much....just because I wear a tutu and have become an instant blond, doesn't mean I'm stupid enough to jump to my death!!
All: DON'T DO THAT AGAIN!!!
Ania: So what do you think happened here?
Me: It's obvious -- the great magical clash of Winglies and Dragoons threw off the balance of nature in this valley and caused the gravity to become warped.
Ania: Thanks, smart ass.
Me: Your welcome
(The Valley of Corrupted Gravity is not one of my favorite places -- it's very annoying to maneuver. You go upside down, sideways, forwards, backwards, down, up -- )
Me: I think I'm gunna be sick...
(Don't worry, I see a save point up ahead)
Nikole, Boberto, Timoty: WTF IS THAT?! *Points to a statue inbedded in the stone*
Ania: Oh god...*covers head* It's calling me again....
Me: Another Virage....and this one isn't missing any body parts, either
Nikole: What's a Virage?
Me: God, not another explanation -- okay, well ya know how the Humans used Dragoons in the Dragon Campaign? Well, the Winglies --
Ania: We don't have time! This one's mad *ground rumbles* AND awake! We hafta retreat!
Welsey: *draws sword* I don't think we have a choice
*Screen dissolves, battle begins*
(Just because this Virage is fully assembled, don't let it intimate you! Just attack the head, and it'll be dead [oo! That rhymes!]. Although this Virage has more potent attacks than the one in the Volcano Villude. One of them is one of those "can't combant" attacks, which automatically kills one of your characters -- dammit, I hate that attack!! Another attack the Virage likes is to confuse, frighten, and/or bewitch all of your players at the same time, so really all you can do is watch as the Dragoons guard, attack themselves and each other, and try to run away until the ailments expire in three turns or so)
[Nice teamwork, guys]
(Of course, the actual battle isn't important -- it's the post battle that counts)
Wesley: *end-of-battle-Dart-move* Okay, I think it's dead, let's go
[You always seem to speak too soon, don't you?]
Wesley: What does that mean?
Virage: *wakes up and lunges for Ania*
All: WHY DON'T THESE THING EVER DIE?!?!?!
Wesley: Ania, look out!!
(Like in the Limestone Cave, Ania unwillingly emulates a blue beam from her body and a large insignia appears on her forehead. This forces the Virage off the edge of the cliff, falling to his doom while hitting his head on a couple of floating rocks)
Nikole: Well that was strange
Wesley: That's like the second time you've done that!
Ania: I know! I know!
Me: Ania, what are you to Virage?
Ania: I don't know!
Timoty: So first you know, and now you don't?
Ania: I guess....*sigh* There goes my sanity, floating away with the rocks...
Me: You got THAT right
~ ~ ~
Wesley: Okay, we should reach the Eastsider's lair in no time at all -- wait a minute, where's the rest of the valley?
All: *jaws drop*
Nikole: You mean, we crossed that ENTIRE valley and the gang's hideout isn't even HERE?!
Wesley: It, uh, looks like it
All: *collapses to the ground, Anime style*
Me: Wesley, maybe you shouldn't talk at all -- I mean, whatever comes out of your mouth is either the direct OPPOSITE of what's really going on, repeating someone else's EXACT words, or an overly obvious phrase!!
Wesley: Well, if I became a mute, then who would you have to torture?
Me: Don't you try that with me, mister!
Wesley: hehehe