Author's Note: This is where I respond to the reviews: Dynasty Black -- no
offense taken. And Nikole really isn't like that in real life, I just
wanted to make her more Meru-like. She couldn't stop laughing when she
read my interpretation of her. And thank you for pointing out my typo
("quick" was supposed to be "quit"). Proof-reading is a good thing, I
should use it more often. Freefall -- I like Al's line too (I should use
that next time I get stuck in a never-ending conversation). Chozen1 --
sorry I left out your favorite part. I have a problem with short-term
memory. Omni Dragon -- I wouldn't go so far as to run him over with a
shopping cart....I think he takes enough verbal abuse (as many have
noticed).
Disclaimer: I don't own LoD y'all should know that by now...
Chapter 18: The Truth and Skin Revealed
(We arrive in Fletz to the sound of fireworks and joyous music)
Wesley: Oh no! Are we too late?! Has the Moon Dagger already been handed over?!
Me: Of course not -- in video games, a crucial moment in the game NEVER happens until the heroes (us) show up. What, you guys never noticed that before?
Leroy: I have.
Me: See? Leroy's not totally on empty....can't say the same for Wesley here.
Wesley: *growls*
Ania: Tina, I'll give you $20 if you don't insult Wesley until the third disk.
Me: Make it $50 and we got a deal. And don't look at me like you don't have that kinda money cuz we all know that you do.
Ania: Fine. *Shakes my hand to seal the deal*
Wesley: *smirks*
Me: *deep breath*
Boberto: So all we need to do is find the real Princess Andrea, expose the fake one, and keep the Moon Dagger out of the imposter's hands. But where is the REAL Andrea?
[Didn't Puppy Chow tell you?]
All: No.
[Oh....I'll have to have a word with him....but she's in the castle]
All: Thanks.
(One more stop before we go to the castle -- )
All: *groan* WHY?!
(C'mon guys, last one I PROMISE! Besides, the ceremony will wait for you)
All: Fine, where to?
(Back to the bar)
Me: Someone restrain the lighweight *looking at Ania* Hey, you never said anything bout not insulting YOU.
(When we arrive in the bar, we find the hyper-active Cristy heckling a tired woman, who resembles an older version of me. On the woman's back is a wiggling baby)
Cristy: Dontchawannatalkboutstars?! C'mon, Iknowyoudoyesyesyes!!!!!
Woman: No, no, no -- I wanna talk bout starDUST not stars! *Both turn to face us*
Cristy: OhitsyouguysagainandAniayourawake!
Ania: Of course I'm...awake....what is she talking about?
Wesley: Hey! It's the woman and baby we bumped into in Bale! How are you?
Me: *gasp* Mom?! Sean?!
(The identity of the woman is revealed as -- my mother. And the baby is my two-year-old brother, Sean. What kind of sick, sick person am I to write my own mother and baby brother into this fic?!)
Mom: Oh, sweetheart I'm so glad I found you! I've been looking all over this strange place...I told you girls to stop playing so many video games! And what are you doing in a bar?!
Me: NOTHING Mom!
Sean: Tee-ah!
Ania: So THAT'S who Tee-ah is --Tina!
Me: Very good Sherlock.
Mom: If you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all, honey.
Me: *turns red from embarrassment*
All: *laughs*
Wesley: *sniggers* Yeah, sweetheart if you don't have anything nice to say...
Me *restrains myself because I really want that $50*
Timoty: Tina, there must be a reason you have your mom in this story...what is it?
Mom: Well, I'm on a search for something besides my oldest daughter -- Stardust. If I can collect all 50 then it can cure my other daughter's life-threatening illness.
Boberto: You mean Lauren? She's not deathly ill, she's across the street having random outbursts about greenery!
Lauren: *from across the street* I'll show you a random outburst!
Boberto: See!? She even has super-human hearing!
(It's okay Boberto; by my all-powerful-fanfiction-magic I can make my sister have the power of bilocation. And bicharacter-ation....ya, that's it...)
Boberto: You make no sense, I'm going to shut up now.
Mom: Actually, Tina, could you do me a huge favor?
Me: *sighs* What?
Mom: Could you collect and give me the Stardust you find?
(Who can say no to their mother?)
Me: *sighs* Fine *gives her 20-something Stardust* We weren't gunna do anything with 'em anyway.
(If you've been collecting Stardust on the way, then you should have 20- something to give to her...but I usually don't so whatever)
Mom: Oh, I forgot...here's a gift for you guys for giving me the Stardust
(She gives you a rare armor piece that you can't buy anywhere else for every 10 Stardust you give her. They usually aren't that helpful, 'cept I arm me/Rose with the Physical Ring so that her health catches up to Wesley's and Leroy's. Just something I thought you all would like to know)
Me: Thanks Mom.
Mom: Now you'll find me in the third disk, won't you? And you'll keep looking for Stardust for me, right?
Me: Yes, Mom.
Mom: Okay *calling out as we are leaving the bar* Don't get into too much trouble!
Me: YES MOM. *To the others* Don't say anything.
Wesley: Ya guys...*smirk* If you can't say anything nice...
~ ~ ~
(At the Twin Castle)
Wesley: That's strange, no guard to not let us in...
*Officer walks in*
Officer: What the hell are you kids doing here?! And since when did you have a Giganto with you?
Nikole: Saving Tiberoa! And we just got him last chapter!
Leroy: *grunts* Hello
Officer: What?
Timoty: We really don't have time to explain it to you. Just let us go in the Castle.
Officer: *glares* Fine, but I'm not letting you out!
Me: Ooh, is that supposed to scare us?
Officer: *death glare* I'm not even gunna deal with you kids right now...I have bigger problems
(We followed his gaze to some suspicious-looking knights patrolling the area.)
Leroy: Bandits?
Officer: They arrived this morning. Seems that since she's 20 Andrea thinks that she can fire and re-hire the entire knighthood.
Nikole: Aww, I detect some bitterness in that statement.
Officer: Mind your own business blondie and go...save Tiberoa or whatever the hell you're doing.
Nikole: Fine then X-P
(Just when you think that we couldn't get in more trouble with authority.....)
Bandit Knight: Hey, you! Yeah I'm talking to you, spiky! What the hell do you think you're doing?!
Nikole: Saving -- *Timoty cups his hand over her mouth*
Wesley: We're uh...looking for....
Me: Princess Alona!
Wesley: Yeah! Looking for Princess Alona.
Bandit Knight: Well, she's not here. She's locked herself up in her room. Not even gunna wish her own sister a happy birthday...
Wesley: Um, yeah, thanks. *Death glare* And we'll be back to settle this *leaves*
Me: *as we are leaving* Settle what?!
Wesley: Dunno, just felt like it was the right thing to say.
Me: But -- you -- *growls* {Think of the $50, Tina....you really need some new shoes....}
(This is one of the more frustrating parts of the game -- in order to get to Alona's room you have to climb the stairs all the way up to the very top of one of the twin towers, all without having any of the bandit knights spotting you. If they spot you, then they blow their whistles and send you back to the beginning. Of course, we are caught about six or seven times before we reach Alona's room.)
Alona: It's you!
Boberto: Yes, it's us! We found out that Andrea really isn't Andrea! It's an imposter!
Alona: Oh thank god, I was afraid I'd have to live with that rude little bitch for the rest of my life!
Nikole: Can princesses say that?
Timoty: We know she's somewhere in the castle, but we don't know where...do you think astrology could tell us?
Alona: I could try *looks at her star chart* Hmm, that's strange. The stars don't want to reveal their story.
Stars: You can't find her! *nyeah nyeah*
Alona: I guess we'll just have to search the castle ourselves. I'll come with you...maybe then the new knights won't give you much trouble if I'm with you.
(She was wrong -- we still got caught five times going down the stairs to the main castle and sent back to the beginning because Alona was supposed to be sick in her room. Damn knights. For some reason, we decide to search Andrea's room [at the top of the other tower], and we still have to avoid the stupid knights, as well as the knights guarding the entrance to Andrea's room)
Knight 1: No one is supposed to be in the princess' room!
Alona: Not even me?
Knight 2: Not even you -- Princess Andrea's orders.
Me: Ya know, it's a long way down to the ground *peering over the edge of the tower*
Knights: And your point?
Me: *evil grin* I bet that no one would hear your screams from all the way up here.
(The other Dragoons looked at me and then each other, and once they figured out what I was implying, they too grinned evily at the knights and placed their hands on their weapons)
Knights: Well -- we -- still...can't.....
Me: What was that? I have a slight hearing problem, you mind repeating that?
(Instead the knights bolt)
Me: Stupid cowards *enters Andrea's room*
(We find Andrea's room ransacked)
Boberto: Makes it look even more suspcious
Leroy: Room too small for me. I wait outside, see if more bandits come *exits*
Timoty: Me too, I'm getting a bit clasterphobic here *exits*
Nikole: I'll come with you! You don't wanna be lonely, do ya?! *Exits*
Wesley: Um, alright....ooh, look at this pretty picture *touches it*
(When Wesley touched the painting of Andrea, everyone in the room disappeared)
Nikole: *runs into the room* Guys? Guys, where'd ya go!?
~ ~ ~
Wesley: Don't tell me -- we got sucked into ANOTHER video game?!
Me: No stu -- *ahem* Wesley....we're in the painting. Seems that someone set up a magical dimension inside the painting....but why?
Nikole: *from outside the painting* Guys?! Where'd ya go?!
Wesley: In here, Nikole! In the painting! But don't touch it!
Nikole: What?! You want me to touch the painting?!
All: NO!
Nikole: Haha, just kidding! I'm not THAT ditzy! *Leans against the painting* Whoa!
(We now have a new guest within the painting)
All: *smacks their foreheads*
Nikole: Heh, heh....hi guys...
Boberto: Look! It's Andrea!
(On the other side of the "magical dimension" was a bound and sleeping Princess Andrea. But no way to get over to her. Oh, what shall we do?)
Boberto: I say jump
Me: Oh yeah, BRILLANT idea Your Majesty....jump and possibly fall into an oblivion
Boberto: *sheepishly* Just a suggestion....
Ania: We could fly!
Wesley: There's not enough room for someone to transform into a Dragoon in here!
Nikole: Hmm, what to do, what to do....*leans against a button on the wall*
(Suddenly, a bridge magically appears, creating a path to the sleeping Andrea)
Nikole: Aren't you glad that I fell in here now?
Boberto: *running across the bridge and kneeling next to Andrea* Princess Andrea!! Princess, wake up, or else something irrevocable will happen to Tiberoa!!
(Apparently, that big word that Boberto used was just what Andrea needed to revive herself)
Andrea: Wha....what's happening? Alona? Boberto? Where'd you come from?
Boberto: No time to explain, just come with us!
(We exited the painting, fetched Timoty and Leroy, and descended to the Chamber of the Sun, where the imposter Princess is about to receive the Moon Dagger! *Gasp* After the bandit knights fled at the sight of the real Andrea...)
Bandit Knight: I thought I told you, spiky, that you couldn't go to the ceremony!!
Andrea: Well what about me?
Bandit Knight: *gasp* P-princess Andrea?! But -- you're supposed to be --
Andrea: Be what? Dead? In a coma? Well, obviously you're wrong. *Turns toward the Chamber of the Sun* I'll be going to MY ceremony now...
Bandit Knight: Dammit, GUYS OUR PLAN IS BUSTED!!!! *Flees*
(...we raced into the Chamber of the Sun to save Tiberoa!!)
Me: Ya know, I should make a T-shirt that says that...
Ania: Says what?
Me: "Save Tiberoa"...yeah, and I could sell it for a ridiculous amount of money!
Wesley: *ahem* Tina? I think that can wait
Me: What? Oh, yeah, sorry *scribbles the idea on a piece of paper*
~ ~ ~
Leif: I welcome all of you to this joyous day! Today, my eldest daughter turns 20 and she has truly grown into a fine young woman, deserving of the Moon Dagger and throne of Tiberoa! Before I proceed, I want to ask if anyone objects to me handing over the Moon Dagger to Andrea.
*Pause*
Leif: I take this silence as approval -- now then, today Andrea --
Wesley: We object!
Leif: What? *Gasp* TWO Andreas?!
(The two Andreas stared each other down while the crowd of Tiberoan elites gasped and murmured. Leif shook his head in bewilderment)
Alona: It's true! Six months ago, the day that Andrea and I went horseback riding, Andrea had an accident and this fake took her place!
Andrea: Seems she's made herself very comfortable *death glare*
(The fake Andrea writhed her hands, trying to think of a way out....soon, a light bulb went off in her head and the fake Andrea charged King Leif and stole the Moon Dagger out of his hands and retreated to the balcony.)
Fake Andrea: Well well, you finally found someone smart enough to figure out my secret! It's about time, I was getting stuffy in this dress.
(In a flash of light, the pink-dress wearing, dark-haired Andrea impersonator turned into a girl wearing a blue brassiere with stitching down the middle, exposing the skin in between her breasts. Her stomach was bare and she wore petal-pushers that was stitched along her outer thighs the same way as her top. Her platinum blond hair was tied with a red bandana)
Timoty: Do ALL platinum-haired girls wear next to nothing?
Nikole: Why are you complaining?
Wesley and Me: Stacy?!
Stacy: Shocked, Tina? I knew you would be.
Boberto: You two know her?
Wesley: She goes to my high school
Me: And she goes to my church....just like Jimbo...
[See what happens to Catholic school girls once they graduate?]
Stacy: How very nice to see you two, but I'm afraid I hafta take this Moon Dagger to my love so I must be going.
Ania: Puppy Chow is dead, so you might as well give us the Dagger back!
Stacy: Forceful, are we? I didn't know the man, much less care for him...and like I said, I need to get this Dagger to my love so if you'll be so kind --
Wesley: You'll hafta get through us first!
Other Dragoons: *draws weapons*
Stacy: Oooh, a threat. Fine then, I'll fight you....but you have no idea who you're dealing with!
Disclaimer: I don't own LoD y'all should know that by now...
Chapter 18: The Truth and Skin Revealed
(We arrive in Fletz to the sound of fireworks and joyous music)
Wesley: Oh no! Are we too late?! Has the Moon Dagger already been handed over?!
Me: Of course not -- in video games, a crucial moment in the game NEVER happens until the heroes (us) show up. What, you guys never noticed that before?
Leroy: I have.
Me: See? Leroy's not totally on empty....can't say the same for Wesley here.
Wesley: *growls*
Ania: Tina, I'll give you $20 if you don't insult Wesley until the third disk.
Me: Make it $50 and we got a deal. And don't look at me like you don't have that kinda money cuz we all know that you do.
Ania: Fine. *Shakes my hand to seal the deal*
Wesley: *smirks*
Me: *deep breath*
Boberto: So all we need to do is find the real Princess Andrea, expose the fake one, and keep the Moon Dagger out of the imposter's hands. But where is the REAL Andrea?
[Didn't Puppy Chow tell you?]
All: No.
[Oh....I'll have to have a word with him....but she's in the castle]
All: Thanks.
(One more stop before we go to the castle -- )
All: *groan* WHY?!
(C'mon guys, last one I PROMISE! Besides, the ceremony will wait for you)
All: Fine, where to?
(Back to the bar)
Me: Someone restrain the lighweight *looking at Ania* Hey, you never said anything bout not insulting YOU.
(When we arrive in the bar, we find the hyper-active Cristy heckling a tired woman, who resembles an older version of me. On the woman's back is a wiggling baby)
Cristy: Dontchawannatalkboutstars?! C'mon, Iknowyoudoyesyesyes!!!!!
Woman: No, no, no -- I wanna talk bout starDUST not stars! *Both turn to face us*
Cristy: OhitsyouguysagainandAniayourawake!
Ania: Of course I'm...awake....what is she talking about?
Wesley: Hey! It's the woman and baby we bumped into in Bale! How are you?
Me: *gasp* Mom?! Sean?!
(The identity of the woman is revealed as -- my mother. And the baby is my two-year-old brother, Sean. What kind of sick, sick person am I to write my own mother and baby brother into this fic?!)
Mom: Oh, sweetheart I'm so glad I found you! I've been looking all over this strange place...I told you girls to stop playing so many video games! And what are you doing in a bar?!
Me: NOTHING Mom!
Sean: Tee-ah!
Ania: So THAT'S who Tee-ah is --Tina!
Me: Very good Sherlock.
Mom: If you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all, honey.
Me: *turns red from embarrassment*
All: *laughs*
Wesley: *sniggers* Yeah, sweetheart if you don't have anything nice to say...
Me *restrains myself because I really want that $50*
Timoty: Tina, there must be a reason you have your mom in this story...what is it?
Mom: Well, I'm on a search for something besides my oldest daughter -- Stardust. If I can collect all 50 then it can cure my other daughter's life-threatening illness.
Boberto: You mean Lauren? She's not deathly ill, she's across the street having random outbursts about greenery!
Lauren: *from across the street* I'll show you a random outburst!
Boberto: See!? She even has super-human hearing!
(It's okay Boberto; by my all-powerful-fanfiction-magic I can make my sister have the power of bilocation. And bicharacter-ation....ya, that's it...)
Boberto: You make no sense, I'm going to shut up now.
Mom: Actually, Tina, could you do me a huge favor?
Me: *sighs* What?
Mom: Could you collect and give me the Stardust you find?
(Who can say no to their mother?)
Me: *sighs* Fine *gives her 20-something Stardust* We weren't gunna do anything with 'em anyway.
(If you've been collecting Stardust on the way, then you should have 20- something to give to her...but I usually don't so whatever)
Mom: Oh, I forgot...here's a gift for you guys for giving me the Stardust
(She gives you a rare armor piece that you can't buy anywhere else for every 10 Stardust you give her. They usually aren't that helpful, 'cept I arm me/Rose with the Physical Ring so that her health catches up to Wesley's and Leroy's. Just something I thought you all would like to know)
Me: Thanks Mom.
Mom: Now you'll find me in the third disk, won't you? And you'll keep looking for Stardust for me, right?
Me: Yes, Mom.
Mom: Okay *calling out as we are leaving the bar* Don't get into too much trouble!
Me: YES MOM. *To the others* Don't say anything.
Wesley: Ya guys...*smirk* If you can't say anything nice...
~ ~ ~
(At the Twin Castle)
Wesley: That's strange, no guard to not let us in...
*Officer walks in*
Officer: What the hell are you kids doing here?! And since when did you have a Giganto with you?
Nikole: Saving Tiberoa! And we just got him last chapter!
Leroy: *grunts* Hello
Officer: What?
Timoty: We really don't have time to explain it to you. Just let us go in the Castle.
Officer: *glares* Fine, but I'm not letting you out!
Me: Ooh, is that supposed to scare us?
Officer: *death glare* I'm not even gunna deal with you kids right now...I have bigger problems
(We followed his gaze to some suspicious-looking knights patrolling the area.)
Leroy: Bandits?
Officer: They arrived this morning. Seems that since she's 20 Andrea thinks that she can fire and re-hire the entire knighthood.
Nikole: Aww, I detect some bitterness in that statement.
Officer: Mind your own business blondie and go...save Tiberoa or whatever the hell you're doing.
Nikole: Fine then X-P
(Just when you think that we couldn't get in more trouble with authority.....)
Bandit Knight: Hey, you! Yeah I'm talking to you, spiky! What the hell do you think you're doing?!
Nikole: Saving -- *Timoty cups his hand over her mouth*
Wesley: We're uh...looking for....
Me: Princess Alona!
Wesley: Yeah! Looking for Princess Alona.
Bandit Knight: Well, she's not here. She's locked herself up in her room. Not even gunna wish her own sister a happy birthday...
Wesley: Um, yeah, thanks. *Death glare* And we'll be back to settle this *leaves*
Me: *as we are leaving* Settle what?!
Wesley: Dunno, just felt like it was the right thing to say.
Me: But -- you -- *growls* {Think of the $50, Tina....you really need some new shoes....}
(This is one of the more frustrating parts of the game -- in order to get to Alona's room you have to climb the stairs all the way up to the very top of one of the twin towers, all without having any of the bandit knights spotting you. If they spot you, then they blow their whistles and send you back to the beginning. Of course, we are caught about six or seven times before we reach Alona's room.)
Alona: It's you!
Boberto: Yes, it's us! We found out that Andrea really isn't Andrea! It's an imposter!
Alona: Oh thank god, I was afraid I'd have to live with that rude little bitch for the rest of my life!
Nikole: Can princesses say that?
Timoty: We know she's somewhere in the castle, but we don't know where...do you think astrology could tell us?
Alona: I could try *looks at her star chart* Hmm, that's strange. The stars don't want to reveal their story.
Stars: You can't find her! *nyeah nyeah*
Alona: I guess we'll just have to search the castle ourselves. I'll come with you...maybe then the new knights won't give you much trouble if I'm with you.
(She was wrong -- we still got caught five times going down the stairs to the main castle and sent back to the beginning because Alona was supposed to be sick in her room. Damn knights. For some reason, we decide to search Andrea's room [at the top of the other tower], and we still have to avoid the stupid knights, as well as the knights guarding the entrance to Andrea's room)
Knight 1: No one is supposed to be in the princess' room!
Alona: Not even me?
Knight 2: Not even you -- Princess Andrea's orders.
Me: Ya know, it's a long way down to the ground *peering over the edge of the tower*
Knights: And your point?
Me: *evil grin* I bet that no one would hear your screams from all the way up here.
(The other Dragoons looked at me and then each other, and once they figured out what I was implying, they too grinned evily at the knights and placed their hands on their weapons)
Knights: Well -- we -- still...can't.....
Me: What was that? I have a slight hearing problem, you mind repeating that?
(Instead the knights bolt)
Me: Stupid cowards *enters Andrea's room*
(We find Andrea's room ransacked)
Boberto: Makes it look even more suspcious
Leroy: Room too small for me. I wait outside, see if more bandits come *exits*
Timoty: Me too, I'm getting a bit clasterphobic here *exits*
Nikole: I'll come with you! You don't wanna be lonely, do ya?! *Exits*
Wesley: Um, alright....ooh, look at this pretty picture *touches it*
(When Wesley touched the painting of Andrea, everyone in the room disappeared)
Nikole: *runs into the room* Guys? Guys, where'd ya go!?
~ ~ ~
Wesley: Don't tell me -- we got sucked into ANOTHER video game?!
Me: No stu -- *ahem* Wesley....we're in the painting. Seems that someone set up a magical dimension inside the painting....but why?
Nikole: *from outside the painting* Guys?! Where'd ya go?!
Wesley: In here, Nikole! In the painting! But don't touch it!
Nikole: What?! You want me to touch the painting?!
All: NO!
Nikole: Haha, just kidding! I'm not THAT ditzy! *Leans against the painting* Whoa!
(We now have a new guest within the painting)
All: *smacks their foreheads*
Nikole: Heh, heh....hi guys...
Boberto: Look! It's Andrea!
(On the other side of the "magical dimension" was a bound and sleeping Princess Andrea. But no way to get over to her. Oh, what shall we do?)
Boberto: I say jump
Me: Oh yeah, BRILLANT idea Your Majesty....jump and possibly fall into an oblivion
Boberto: *sheepishly* Just a suggestion....
Ania: We could fly!
Wesley: There's not enough room for someone to transform into a Dragoon in here!
Nikole: Hmm, what to do, what to do....*leans against a button on the wall*
(Suddenly, a bridge magically appears, creating a path to the sleeping Andrea)
Nikole: Aren't you glad that I fell in here now?
Boberto: *running across the bridge and kneeling next to Andrea* Princess Andrea!! Princess, wake up, or else something irrevocable will happen to Tiberoa!!
(Apparently, that big word that Boberto used was just what Andrea needed to revive herself)
Andrea: Wha....what's happening? Alona? Boberto? Where'd you come from?
Boberto: No time to explain, just come with us!
(We exited the painting, fetched Timoty and Leroy, and descended to the Chamber of the Sun, where the imposter Princess is about to receive the Moon Dagger! *Gasp* After the bandit knights fled at the sight of the real Andrea...)
Bandit Knight: I thought I told you, spiky, that you couldn't go to the ceremony!!
Andrea: Well what about me?
Bandit Knight: *gasp* P-princess Andrea?! But -- you're supposed to be --
Andrea: Be what? Dead? In a coma? Well, obviously you're wrong. *Turns toward the Chamber of the Sun* I'll be going to MY ceremony now...
Bandit Knight: Dammit, GUYS OUR PLAN IS BUSTED!!!! *Flees*
(...we raced into the Chamber of the Sun to save Tiberoa!!)
Me: Ya know, I should make a T-shirt that says that...
Ania: Says what?
Me: "Save Tiberoa"...yeah, and I could sell it for a ridiculous amount of money!
Wesley: *ahem* Tina? I think that can wait
Me: What? Oh, yeah, sorry *scribbles the idea on a piece of paper*
~ ~ ~
Leif: I welcome all of you to this joyous day! Today, my eldest daughter turns 20 and she has truly grown into a fine young woman, deserving of the Moon Dagger and throne of Tiberoa! Before I proceed, I want to ask if anyone objects to me handing over the Moon Dagger to Andrea.
*Pause*
Leif: I take this silence as approval -- now then, today Andrea --
Wesley: We object!
Leif: What? *Gasp* TWO Andreas?!
(The two Andreas stared each other down while the crowd of Tiberoan elites gasped and murmured. Leif shook his head in bewilderment)
Alona: It's true! Six months ago, the day that Andrea and I went horseback riding, Andrea had an accident and this fake took her place!
Andrea: Seems she's made herself very comfortable *death glare*
(The fake Andrea writhed her hands, trying to think of a way out....soon, a light bulb went off in her head and the fake Andrea charged King Leif and stole the Moon Dagger out of his hands and retreated to the balcony.)
Fake Andrea: Well well, you finally found someone smart enough to figure out my secret! It's about time, I was getting stuffy in this dress.
(In a flash of light, the pink-dress wearing, dark-haired Andrea impersonator turned into a girl wearing a blue brassiere with stitching down the middle, exposing the skin in between her breasts. Her stomach was bare and she wore petal-pushers that was stitched along her outer thighs the same way as her top. Her platinum blond hair was tied with a red bandana)
Timoty: Do ALL platinum-haired girls wear next to nothing?
Nikole: Why are you complaining?
Wesley and Me: Stacy?!
Stacy: Shocked, Tina? I knew you would be.
Boberto: You two know her?
Wesley: She goes to my high school
Me: And she goes to my church....just like Jimbo...
[See what happens to Catholic school girls once they graduate?]
Stacy: How very nice to see you two, but I'm afraid I hafta take this Moon Dagger to my love so I must be going.
Ania: Puppy Chow is dead, so you might as well give us the Dagger back!
Stacy: Forceful, are we? I didn't know the man, much less care for him...and like I said, I need to get this Dagger to my love so if you'll be so kind --
Wesley: You'll hafta get through us first!
Other Dragoons: *draws weapons*
Stacy: Oooh, a threat. Fine then, I'll fight you....but you have no idea who you're dealing with!