Hey there! Here's a story that was written by us. It's a Buffy thing. We
were bored one night, and this masterpiece was born. It's an
Andrew/Jonathan thing, and kind of a Spike/Chrissy thing. Ish. We're not
too sure about that. Chrissy's not a character on Buffy you silly folk.
Kind of Spike/Angel.... Doyle/Xander? Eh? We're sure about that one either.
The only definite one is Andrew/Jonathan. The rules of Buffy do not apply.
Spike and Angel are still vampires, Doyle's still alive, we never really
see Cordy, who, if we feel like it, will still be alive. Everyone's alive!
Jonathan came back from the dead rather gay. Deal. Warren's still dead,
because Warren's stupid.
Um, the first part of this is rather confusing, we were just messing
around, just stick with it, it'll get better. Every once in a while it'll
say "LAURA, CHRISSY or CAITLIN" and that means that's the person who's
writing, got that? If not, tough. Commence with the reading!
LAURA
Once upon a time, there were these two kids. They were kind of geeks, see. Just kind of. Then there was this time when one of them went crazy and killed the other. And then he went and saved the world. It's a little complicated.
Anyway, the murderer kid, his name is Andrew. He's a nice guy, made one mistake. He's a budding documentarian. You know, the kind who makes documentaries. I don't know the freaking word; do I look like a dictionary? I'm just the typist.
Anyway, he goes to merry old England. Why not? He's sort of a watcher-in- training. Don't ask me what that is, you moron, I don't have time for this. Anyway, in England lots of crazy things happen.
Like ghosts.
Here begins the tale.
CAITLIN
The tale, the history, the beginning of a whole new life. Well, I guess. Sort of. Anyway, Andrew was a very lovely boy. He had what we like to call "hobbit hair". It's really quite exquisite. You should see it, it's beautiful. Ok, THEN Andrew got bored one day, and he was alone because everyone else left. Because I said so. Everyone else went off to... college. Even Giles. All the potentials, excuse me, they're now slayers, all went off to college.
Andrew was at this huge school all alone (school for slayer training) and so he decided he needed some company. Who better than his old best friend, Jonathan. There were some unfortunate circumstances around their relationship ending, but none of that's important. Actually it's very important, so I'll explain it. Andrew stabbed Jonathan in the stomach, killing him. It was gruesome and completely unnecessary, but Andrew had a momentary lapse of coolness and did it.
Ok, now Andrew thinks he wants to raise his ghost, because, he wants to. He wants to apologize for all that crap. So he does. Tada! Now Jonathan's around, not corporeal or anything but that's ok. He can just be Andrew's quirky sidekick on a quest to defeat evil.
CHRISSY
Well I don't know much about their story but I do know about Spike because well I'm the one he loves. (not Buffy) Yes so one day he came to LA because well the necklace he was in ended up there because well why not and LA that's where I live. Anyway he ended up there at Wolfram and Hart and this man Angel (who is ok) I know who is my friend really only because we work together you know he has this good moments and then these really annoying ones like Buffy moments with all this talk he does and it gets on my nerves but hey what can you do he has been around for 200 years (he's a vampire).
Anyway Spike, well, the necklace, came to work, Oh by the way I'm Chrissy nice to meet you. Ok well now back to the story now that we know each other. Well the necklace came into work and well I got it and asked this fine gal Fred to help me and she did and he came out and well it was love and first site and yeah well we are now married. And he is very lovely and he looks like Billy Idol and if you don't know who Billy is then you are stupid and yeah. Well we lived happily ever after and yeah.
I'm done.
It gets better I swear!
LAURA
Once upon a time, there were these two kids. They were kind of geeks, see. Just kind of. Then there was this time when one of them went crazy and killed the other. And then he went and saved the world. It's a little complicated.
Anyway, the murderer kid, his name is Andrew. He's a nice guy, made one mistake. He's a budding documentarian. You know, the kind who makes documentaries. I don't know the freaking word; do I look like a dictionary? I'm just the typist.
Anyway, he goes to merry old England. Why not? He's sort of a watcher-in- training. Don't ask me what that is, you moron, I don't have time for this. Anyway, in England lots of crazy things happen.
Like ghosts.
Here begins the tale.
CAITLIN
The tale, the history, the beginning of a whole new life. Well, I guess. Sort of. Anyway, Andrew was a very lovely boy. He had what we like to call "hobbit hair". It's really quite exquisite. You should see it, it's beautiful. Ok, THEN Andrew got bored one day, and he was alone because everyone else left. Because I said so. Everyone else went off to... college. Even Giles. All the potentials, excuse me, they're now slayers, all went off to college.
Andrew was at this huge school all alone (school for slayer training) and so he decided he needed some company. Who better than his old best friend, Jonathan. There were some unfortunate circumstances around their relationship ending, but none of that's important. Actually it's very important, so I'll explain it. Andrew stabbed Jonathan in the stomach, killing him. It was gruesome and completely unnecessary, but Andrew had a momentary lapse of coolness and did it.
Ok, now Andrew thinks he wants to raise his ghost, because, he wants to. He wants to apologize for all that crap. So he does. Tada! Now Jonathan's around, not corporeal or anything but that's ok. He can just be Andrew's quirky sidekick on a quest to defeat evil.
CHRISSY
Well I don't know much about their story but I do know about Spike because well I'm the one he loves. (not Buffy) Yes so one day he came to LA because well the necklace he was in ended up there because well why not and LA that's where I live. Anyway he ended up there at Wolfram and Hart and this man Angel (who is ok) I know who is my friend really only because we work together you know he has this good moments and then these really annoying ones like Buffy moments with all this talk he does and it gets on my nerves but hey what can you do he has been around for 200 years (he's a vampire).
Anyway Spike, well, the necklace, came to work, Oh by the way I'm Chrissy nice to meet you. Ok well now back to the story now that we know each other. Well the necklace came into work and well I got it and asked this fine gal Fred to help me and she did and he came out and well it was love and first site and yeah well we are now married. And he is very lovely and he looks like Billy Idol and if you don't know who Billy is then you are stupid and yeah. Well we lived happily ever after and yeah.
I'm done.
It gets better I swear!