Disclaimer: Aren't I JKR yet?
This sniff is the final weekend before sniff BACK TO SCHOOL! Hey I know I'm being a bit over dramatic but that's just me. I really hope schoolwork won't put me behind in my updating!
And as always thanks are going out to all the wonderful reviewers!
mouskadidddle: I'm glad you liked the story but I don't think that Harry/Luna are such an absurd couple especially in a world of pairings as strange as Harry/Snape. I actually find couples that steer away from the usual groupings refreshing at times. But I still respect your opinion and thanks a whole lot for reviewing!
Silver Ice: Firstly thank you for reviewing my story each chapter and yeah Harry was definitely much wiser than Ron there. I think it rubbed off on him from being around his lady Ravenclaw so much. We all know Ron can be very...amusing/alarming when he wants to be. So I hope you enjoy this utter chaos.
QueEnfullofDrama: Yeah totally woot to Ron! Thank you for your flattering comments! And yes I am very appreciative of the 'Scandal' term.
fairygirl100: Mmm! I urged to give away clues to you but I can't! Thanks for the review though!
airhead14: Hermione has always been a good friend to them all. Although sometimes people think she's not as loyal as Ron because of the choices she makes. But it's all for everyone's well being! I'm glad you see that!
Chrismukkah-hunnie: The World Cup is awesome! It's always nice to meet another supporter of Canadian Hockey! Since I am addicted myself. Although I wish all the countries well I just can't help but be a bit biased. Go Canada! Thank you Thank you for your review too!
lindsey-31: Hm I want to show you all my gratitude for reviewing all my works! I think if you look below you'll find it!
Fawkes Forever: You're all too wonderful! Thanks for all total boost of my day! I hope you like this chapter as much as you did the last!
bethzc: Lol I try to keep it as humorous as possible! I want you all to enjoy this as much as I do!
MeryKey-7: I'm so glad you loved it! And kudos to you for having faith in Hermione!
And I just want to dedicate this particular chapter to one of my most favorite reviewers who has reviewed my first story and has loyally reviewed this story too. In a world where sometimes getting loyal reviewers is so impossible I want to thank lindsey-31 for all your wonderful reviews. You compliment me all too much with your insightful and flattering reviews. This is for you lindsey-31! Thank you so much!
In about five minutes, Ron was looking ready to entertain the Queen of England if he had to. Face washed. Clothes ironed. He'd also whitened his teeth with a nifty spell. Everyone was surprised by the mass transformation he'd undertaken. Even Mrs. Weasley was surprised by how tame her son could get his hair if he tried. What most of them didn't know was that he wasn't doing this for Becky. It was all to impress Hermione.
Mrs. Weasley seemed so proud of him it was almost as if he'd been chosen to be a prefect once again. When he'd headed downstairs for the first time, she'd looked like she was about to sprout tears. At first Ron felt rather self-conscious about this. Did he look that ugly? But he felt quickly reassured when she'd given him a lengthy hug and frowned as he saw Fred and George pretending to gag between her arms.
"Where are you taking her anyways?" Ginny questioned, eyeing her youngest brother with approval.
"Port Key to Paradise," Ron replied, straightening his robes.
"That's splendid. That restaurant is one of the best in Britain. Becky's very lucky," Ginny said with a slightly dreamy look in her eyes as if she were wishing someone would whisk her away there too.
Ron tried to give a realistic smile, but instead gave a smile that made him seem have sick.
"Port Key to Paradise...you know I've heard the chefs there sometimes add love potion to their recipes-"
"Luna," Harry said firmly as if wishing she would stop.
"What?" Luna asked innocently, "It was in the Wonkydunt Bible!"
Harry gave her a weak smile before turning to Ron, "So you best be going if you want to be on time."
Ron knew he was speaking about his plan to invade Seamus and Hermione's dinner date.
"Yes, all too true. Bye you lot," Ron said in hurry. He didn't want to miss the pair of them and then actually have to spend the night in Becky's company.
They gave him their farewells and wishes of good luck, and his mother gave him a look that said he'd better not be a disappointment for Becky. Ron wasted no time using the Floo Network, but quickly apparated to Becky's hotel. Some exclusive place near Buckingham Palace, supposedly, and well hidden from Muggles. Ron popped in and was shocked to see Muggles there. For a whole frightful second, he'd feared they had noticed he apparated in, but then he saw their vacant expressions as they were obviously teasing some men in an absurd outfits.
They were wearing tall furry black "hats" if that's what you could call the silly, hump-shaped, things on their heads. A funny looking red coat and some trousers were also added to their wardrobe. It must've been a pain to have to wear that embarrassing outfit everyday. And worse yet the men looked like they couldn't move as if the Basilisk had petrified them. Ron might've thought so if it was not for the fact that he'd seen one of the men blink.
Ron knew not to dawdle. This was a great location for a Wizarding Hotel because the wizards quickly mixed in with the Muggle tourists who always wore strange clothes from other countries. So a few odd Wizards were nothing. Ron made his way around the palace grounds to the gate with glistening bars. He just had to figure out which one was a port key to the hotel. He came to a neglected bar far on the left side and noticed a tiny scrawl written there. If he had not been looking for some sign of a Port Key he wouldn't have noticed it.
It read...NOGARD DNARG EHT. Ron quickly drew a small mirror out of his pocket and held it up to the words. It read The Grand Dragon. Ron placed his mirror back in his pocket. He'd found the port key bar. Most people would not carry a mirror in their pockets, but Ron wasn't like most. He'd learned over the years that a mirror came in handy for more than just applying make-up.
Ron grabbed the bar and felt a certain adrenaline rush as the swirls of color whirled around him. Soon he found himself at the The Grand Dragon Inn and wizards and witches were scurrying every which way along with house-elves. Ron wondered if they were paid. Becky was already waiting for him in the lobby and looked positively delighted to see him.
"Ren! 'Tis gud to see you once again" Becky said and flashed him a grin. Ron felt his ears go red. Perhaps he didn't feel about Becky like he did about Hermione, but she was certainly beautiful enough to cause him to blush at her grins. She could've been a Veela and since she was Fleur's friend that made the chances grow even higher.
"Yeah, you too. So I guess we should get going?" Ron said, itching to reach Port Key to Paradise in time.
"Yes, vould you like to floo?" Becky suggested.
"Floo? No way! It'll take forever to-uh-to-," Ron stammered, knowing he had come very close to revealing his plan which he presumed Becky would not like. Seeing the confused look on Becky's face, he added, "Flooing takes too long. Let's apparate."
"Alvight," Becky said, still shooting Ron looks of bewilderment.
They reached Port Key to Paradise in no time, even though to Ron it seemed all too long. As they entered the restaurant, which was busier than it had been the first time Ron had been there, he started to crane his neck for Seamus and Hermione. Becky cocked her head slightly and looked at him as if he were crazy.
"Uh, I've got a kink in my neck," Ron fibbed. She did not seem to quite believe his answer.
"Sir, may I get you a table?" a human waiter asked him. Ron looked at him and thought of how he could ask to be placed at Seamus and Hermione's table without further confusing Becky.
"Hey, Becky-uh-look!" Ron said, pointing somewhere over in the direction of a party of two people. They were chatting normally and there was nothing fascinating about them.
"Erm, Renold, vhat am I suppose to be looking at?" Becky questioned but in spite of herself looked in the direction Ron was pointing also.
"Uh-" Ron mumbled, looking around. The closest thing was their waiter, who was looking at Ron rather expectantly and annoyed and there was another female waitress coming up carrying a large ice cream mountain. Ron pulled on the collar of his robe. Maybe this wasn't the brilliant idea he had planned.
"Renold?" Becky said impatiently, "Vhat iz going on?"
In the split second that the waitress carrying the mounds of ice cream was passing by Ron and Becky, Ron's foot somehow found it's way in the path of the unknowing waitress. And in two seconds it was a done deed. Becky was dripping from head to toe in ice cream. Sticky chocolate sauce was pouring in little drops off her usually beautiful blonde hair. She looked shocked and angry. But not at Ron, at the waitress. Ron had to admit he had been very clever in doing it so discreetly. The waitress looked horrified at what she'd done and wasn't even breathing. Her mouth was wide open and her eyes were popping out of their sockets.
Becky opened her mouth to yell at her, but only more ice cream came out. After she'd spit a good quantity out onto the floor, she dared to look up at Ron, the waitress, and the other waiter.
"My robes!" Becky wailed loudly, "What have you done to my robes?!"
"Becky, I'll clear this all up. You go to the girl's bathroom to clean yourself up, okay?" Ron suggested. Becky looked highly affronted, but trudged off to the bathroom grudgingly. Ron watched her knock into a tray full of crab cakes on the way. Evidently ice cream could blind you.
"Listen," Ron began urgently, turning to the waiter, "Can we please be seated with the Finnigan party?"
"I'm afraid not, sir, they requested only a party of two," the waiter responded.
"Oh, really?" Ron said, "Well, change it. I'm Ron Weasley, you know."
"Is that right? Well then, Mr. Weasley, perhaps you'd like to acknowledge the fact that here at Port Key to Paradise we do not treat anybody differently because they are famous and nor do we condone threats," the waiter replied coolly.
"Then prepare to shut yourselves down," Ron said dangerously.
"You cannot shut us down," the waiter snorted.
"Yes, I can if I complain about what you've done to me," Ron answered.
"Sir, we've done nothing to you," the waiter said with a sigh.
"Oh, really? Well, what if I were to slip on this ice cream on the floor here. Firstly, you've got ice cream on the floor which isn't very hygienic and then you've got me slipping on it and say I've broken my ankle!" Ron smirked, placing a foot on the ice cream and sliding on it playfully a bit, "And all these people have witnessed it."
The waiter looked taken aback.
"But-but, sir, surely breaking your ankle is not worth-" he spluttered.
"Get me in with the Finnigan Party," Ron repeated this time in a whisper. The waiter stared at him for a long moment, then nodded. Becky joined them a while later and, even though the best of the ice cream was gone, she still looked a mess. Her hair had gone straggly and the dress robes were ruined beyond repair.
"Right, just this way," the waiter said, weaving them through the tables. When Ron finally caught a glimpse of Seamus and Hermione, he almost wished he hadn't. They were holding hands and he had just whispered something in her ear that made her laugh softly. It looked like they were just finishing off their appetizers so Ron wasn't that far behind schedule.
"Ahem. Mr. Finnigan, Miss Granger, you have some...guests," the waiter said, gesturing towards Ron and Becky. Both Hermione and Seamus looked so surprised at their arrival that they released each other's hands immediately.
"Ron, how, er, pleasant of you to join us," Hermione said, shooting him a questioning glare.
"Yes, well, I thought the more the merrier, eh?" Ron said, nudging Becky.
"Sir, what will you have?" the waiter asked.
"Whatever they're having is just fine," Ron said, waving his hand.
"Renold," Becky whispered harshly, "I didn't know ve ver going to 'ave a duble date."
"Well, we are," Ron explained, "You see in England,its tradition. It even says in-Ron paused to think of something that couldn't possibly exist-in our Wonkydunt Bible."
"Wonkydunt Bible?" Becky asked curiously, "Vhat iz dat?"
"Very, very important reading to us English," Ron finished.
"What are you two talking about?" Seamus questioned.
"Nothing, just English traditions is all," Ron replied simply.
"So, Ron, this is your date?" Hermione asked sharply and, Ron realized that ever since she'd seen them, Hermione hadn't taken her eyes off Becky.
"Uh, yeah," Ron said carelessly.
"So where are you from?" Hermione wanted to know, "You've got an accent."
"France," Becky answered and it seemed she too had intently been watching Hermione.
"Ah, I see. Which school did you attend?" Hermione shot.
"Beauxbatons, the best magical school in the world," Becky shot back. Ron's jaw dropped at her direct shot at Hogwarts. No way was Beauxbatons ever going to surpass Hogwarts.
"You believe that even though Hogwarts produces more students with better occupations? All the Ministry of Magic in England has been schooled at Hogwarts," Hermione clarified angrily.
"I verk fer the Ministry of Magick en France. I am un Auror," Becky retorted, now sounding angry also.
"So you agree that the Ministry of Magic in France has been very discriminatory to Beasts and is much more appreciative of creatures listed under Beings?" Hermione snarled. It was most unlike her.
"Don't you dare insult France!" Becky exclaimed, shooting up out of her seat. All people in vicinity twisted around in their seats to get a good look at the scene. She grabbed a glass of champagne and thrust it's contents into Hermione's face. Hermione also rose to her feet.
"Oh, that was very mature!" Hermione shouted, sarcasm dripping off her voice. She snatched the glass of champagne Seamus had been drinking from his hands and soon Becky was once again dripping from head to toe, except this time it was from champagne.
They both stood there glowering at each other and Ron wondered what could have provoked such hate between the two women. They had only just met after all. Seamus seemed to be thinking along the same lines because he spoke up.
"Ladies, ladies, please settle down, everyone is staring," Seamus said calmly. But for some reason, instead of taking heed to what Seamus said, Becky took a pie from a passing house-elf and flung it at Hermione. She ducked it and Seamus's face came into full contact with lemon meringue.
Ron felt like he was the luckiest man alive. He had come tonight to launch his campaign of terror and had succeeded wonderfully without even doing a thing...almost. Never in his wildest dreams did he think he'd get the privilege of seeing Seamus's face splattered with pie.
The waiter from before hurried over to them. Ron was the only one who wasn't an utter mess. Surprise, surprise.
"Please, leave my restaurant immediately!" he cried half-heartedly. The four of them soon found themselves being thrown out of their favorite restaurant and stood lamely in Diagon Alley.
"That vas humiliating!" Becky cried, "Renold, I am sorry, but I do not vink this vill verk out!"
Ron watched her apparate and found that he did not feel one bit hurt. Actually, he was relieved. His mother may be upset but who cared? He'd succeeded in everything he'd wanted to do tonight.
"Ron," Seamus said, "We're so sorry."
Ron could see the concern in his face through the layers of cream.
"Thanks, but it doesn't matter," Ron shrugged, "I didn't like her anyways."
Soon a dreary silence washed over them only broken by the sudden mad laughter of Hermione. Ron and Seamus looked at her incredulously and arched their eyebrows.
"That wasn't humiliating!" Hermione said, laughing, "It was bloody brilliant! I haven't had that much fun in so long!"
She ran over to the both of them and, surprisingly enough, Ron was the one she hugged and gave a kiss on the cheek. He felt so smug at that moment. Hermione'd come to him. He wondered what Seamus was feeling.
"Sorry, Seamus," Hermione said, looking at the shocked look on her boyfriend's face, "But your covered in lemon meringue!"
Author's Note: Phew! For a WHOLE second I thought I would not make my own deadline to finish this chapter! Sorry but it's been a busy weekend. Anyways I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It was fun to write!