Alone

(Part One, Draco's POV)

I hear the ticking of the clock

I'm lying in the room's pitch dark

Draco was sitting on the floor, his back against one of the four bedposts. He was holding a near-empty bottle of Ogden's Firewhiskey and was staring far ahead, his silver-gray eyes casting a look of regret as he contemplated on the night that was.

It was already half past two in the morning, and he was still awake. The Firewhiskey obviously didn't help one bit. It didn't drown his sorrows. It didn't wash away his remorse.

He took another swig from the bottle, draining it from all its contents. He closed his eyes hoping for the last time that the liquid could ease the pain. It was in vain.

Draco put the bottle down on the floor none too gently, letting it roll across the floor. The sound it made as it hit the foot of his desk was the first and only sound that has been heard in his room since he arrived at the manor that night.

Yes, Draco was used to being alone. But he has never felt this forlorn before.

I wonder where you are tonight

No answer on the telephone

He wanted to reach her now, but he doesn't know how. You are an idiot, Draco, he thought to himself. You let your chance pass you by.

Out of sheer desperation, he sighed and rested his head against the bedpost, his eyes closed and brows furrowed. In his mind, he saw her again as she left the ball with Potter earlier that night. Her long red locks swept up into an elegant bun, her emerald green dress flowing against her ankles, her arm around the bespectacled young man Draco had loathed since their school days.

Draco wondered agonizingly where they had gone.

And the night goes by so very slow

Oh I hope that it won't end though

Alone

Another round of Firewhiskey, he thought, as the notion of her possibly spending the night with Potter dawned on him, ripping through his heart. He reached for his wand in his pocket and pointed at another bottle of Firewhiskey and muttered, "Accio!"

The bottle zoomed to his outstretched palm, but he didn't open it, didn't drink the hot liquid that promises unfeeling and disregard. Instead he threw it across the room with all his might. The bottle hit the wall, nearly missing the portrait of the woman he had thought of so much that night. The portrait he had so lovingly toiled for the last few weeks.

I wish it had just been me, Draco thought as the bottle shattered to pieces, its contents splattered all over the floor. I'm damn near broken. I wanted this feeling to pour out and leave me be.

'Til now I always got by on my own

I never really cared until I met you

And now it chills me to the bone

He looked at the portrait on the wall and sniggered bitterly. You've made a mess out of my life, made me a wretched man.

He loved her. Oh how he loves her still.

He remembered the day he first saw her at a desolate bookshop so many years ago. Her face covered in soot, her clothes shabby and the books in her obviously secondhand cauldron were tattered. She was someone he had been taught to hate – a muggle-loving fool. And even then she had stood up for Potter.

"Potter. Always Potter," he spat grudgingly. When the woman in the portrait smiled meekly, his heart skipped a bit, but the jealousy and anguish that he felt was more powerful tonight "I'm sure that smile is still for him, isn't it? Saint Potter!" he implored the portrait sullenly and he swiftly turned around and slammed his fist against the bedpost. Anger raging through his veins.

How do I get you alone

How do I get you alone

Draco let his tired body drop onto his bed. His face down against the cool sheets, he whispered, "I wanted to tell you so tonight. I wanted to have you all to myself, but I didn't have the chance. Or maybe I've just been a coward. What have you done to me?"

He rolled onto his side and tucked his knees closer to him. He wanted someone to hold him. He wanted her with him. He has never felt so alone. Visions of her raced through his mind. The face he has grown to love and know very well through the years haunting him.

"Oh Ginny…"

It was all that he said, as a breeze slipped past his open window, a chill ran down his spine. And the only thing to be heard was the rustling of the leaves outside and the faint sound of Draco's own heartbeat.

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Song Title: Alone

Band: Heart