Chapter Nine

He pulled into Phoenix a little after nine on Friday night. He had made better time than he thought he would. He pulled a tattered piece of paper from his wallet. It was Nigel's address. Garret had given it to him before he left Boston. They couldn't find Jordan's address. Maybe it wasn't in the system yet. He stopped at a gas station at the edge of the city and asked for directions. It wasn't hard to find. It was right off the interstate.

He drove to the residence and walked up the sidewalk to hesitantly knock on the door. Nigel answered. "Woody?" he asked, not really believing his eyes.

"Hi, Nige. Can I come in?" he asked, nervously shifting his weight from foot to foot.

Nigel pushed the door open a little wider to let the detective in. Woody brushed by him and walked into the living room. There was a petite woman sitting on the couch, with long purple hair. "Woodrow, meet my girlfriend, Veronica, or rather Ronnie as she would rather be called. Ronnie, this is Woody Hoyt."

Ronnie raised her perfectly shaped eyebrows and gave Nigel a look over Woody's head. Nigel nodded. "Nice to meet you, Woody." She turned to Nigel and said, "I feel a little tired…I think I'm going to head on up to bed."

"Night, love," Nigel said, giving her a quick kiss as she passed him. "I'll be up soon."

"Pretty lady," Woody said.

"Thanks. I think so. She's a great woman."

"Been together long?"

"About nine months…she's the reason I'm staying in Phoenix."

Woody smiled. Jordan had kept him in Boston more times than he could count. And Nigel had just answered his unstated question … had Jordan ran to Phoenix to be with Nigel? The answer was no…at least not in the way he had been thinking. "I'm glad things are working out so well for you here, Nige."

"Very well. We're expecting our first child in about seven months."

"Congratulations." He and Jordan had talked about having children before everything got so hectic. They had wanted two…now he wondered if that would ever happen. His heart ached just little harder. "Nige….I need to see her," Woody finally said, hearing the desperation in his own voice. He wondered how apparent it was to Nigel.

"I don't know if that would be the best idea, Woody. Given everything that has happened…and the way she feels now."

"How does she feel?"

"Hurt. Betrayed. Angry. Her emotions run the gamut. She's at the angry stage right now. Wanting to go on with her life, but feeling like she can't until you file those papers." Nigel didn't feel like holding back with the detective. Jordan wasn't Nigel's to protect any longer, but neither was she really Woody's. Because of that, he felt like he could be as blunt as he needed to be with the detective. "So why haven't you filed them? You sure as hell had them drawn up quickly enough."

Woody sighed. "I did it to get her attention. She was working all these hours…she wouldn't ask Macy to cut her a little slack so we could be together. I was working all the time. Then, I'm sure she told you about Amy."

Nigel nodded. Many of Jordan's earlier conversations had included Amy. "I have heard of the woman."

"The fact is Nigel, nothing happened between Amy and me. Nothing. She was my partner. That's all. But I couldn't make Jordan believe it. And Amy's transferred out of my department. I have a new partner… and older guy named David. But I haven't been able to tell her this. She won't take my calls…or call me back."

Nigel nodded again. "I know. I know." He sat back in his chair, put his hands behind his head, stretched his legs out in front of him, and blew out a deep sigh. It was time to be honest with Woody. Maybe he should have done this a long time ago. He knew Woody had been jealous at times over his and Jordan's friendship. Woody didn't understand why Nigel knew Jordan better than anyone at the morgue…even Dr. Macy. Finally, leaning forward, he looked the detective in the eyes.

"I know Jordan, Woody. I've known her longer for nearly anyone, except Dr. Macy. But I met her only a month after he did. And I know her better than Garret does. Much better. Garret has always been a father-type figure for Jordan. I wasn't. She could tell me things she couldn't tell Garret.

"I know she loved you, Woody. Deeply. Completely. More than she's loved anyone. But, for all of Jordan's complexities…issues….toughness, the fact is, deep down under all of that…she's a woman in the truest sense of the word. She has the same feelings that any other woman has. She wants to be loved. She wants to be cherished. And you ripped all of that out from under her three months ago. You may have just wanted to get her attention…let her know how serious all this was. But between her perceived theory of what was going on with you and Amy and the divorce, you took the security she had with you away.

"If you remember, I was the one who urged her to start taking you seriously…quit pushing you away…from the very beginning. That was because I felt with you, she was safe. She could trust her heart with you…you'd guard it like it was your very own. But you've ended up hurting her, just like every other male in her life. And if you've noticed, every man that has hurt her has lost something….a part of Jordan that she doesn't give back, even if she forgives you. Look at her relationship with her father. It hasn't been the same since she found out all the lies about James. Look at her relationship with Macy. Sure, she adores the man, but she doesn't talk to him like she used to. She hasn't called him since she's been here. Garret had to call her.

"And lastly, look at me. Ever since I hurt her, there's still a wall between us. Even though we've worked through most of our issues a long time ago, there's still a part of Jordan that she keeps hidden from me. There's still that circle around her soul that she will no longer let me inside of."

Woody looked at Nigel. "You hurt Jordan? How? I mean, you two have always been the best of friends."

Nigel smiled at him…it wasn't a full smile and it didn't reach his eyes. Now was the time. "Jordan and I were lovers, Woody."

Woody blanched. That was the last thing he expected.

"Were," Nigel continued. "Years ago. After she first returned to Boston from LA. It didn't last long….less than a year…and we kept it totally secret. Max didn't know….and God knows, Macy didn't know. I got to understand her very well. That was a period in Jordan's life where she would tell you everything. There wasn't that tough, outer shell there. That's something that I've seen the years put on the lady. Then, she was open…vulnerable. She told me whatever was on her mind. But I was a coward. The morgue had a rule during those years…it frowned on relationships with co-workers. I was afraid of losing my job and being deported. So I called it quits. We parted as friends, and have remained so, but it was hard winning the lady's trust back. It took me a long time and it's something I still don't have completely. I probably never will. But I value what I have. And in my own way, I still love Jordan. I'd do anything for her. And I think she'd return the favor."

Woody listened, his mouth slightly agape with amazement. Finally he found his voice. "But you and she…since that time…you haven't…"

Nigel shook his head. "No. Not once. I have been sorely tempted, but I don't think it's even tiptoed across her mind. I lost my chance. I believe you have, too."

Woody shook his head. "But I need to see her. I need to talk to her…face to face. I need to hear it from her…that it's final."

"I can't guarantee she'll talk to you."

"I'll risk it."

Nigel sighed. "Go to the end of my block. Take a right. Turn right down the next street. Her house is 1513 Lucas Drive. It's a tiny, pinkish adobe house. You can't miss it. Her rag top is in the driveway if she's home."