Look At Me
AN: Sometimes I just feel like writing something and when I do write it, I
end up looking at it like I wrote this?!! So please don't be too harsh even
though all opinions are welcome.
Disclaimer: If I did own Inuyasha, would I be posting this? NO! I would be
busy huggling Kouga and Miroku because my friends would attack me for
Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha. u.u; darn.
Why won't you look at me? I always wish that you would.
But you never do.
You have eyes only for her,
Only for her, you look right through me.
Right into the person I was once, in a past life.
My incarnate.
It's not fair.
I give my heart to you, bareing it on my sleeve,
Yet stillignore it, ignoring me in the process.
I am just a replacement for her,
I'm just a shard detector.Why won't you look at me? I always wish that you
would.
I'm nothing.
I'm giving up my school, my friends, my family to be here with you.
But you won't have me.
All you see is the person who took your first love.
Who manipulated you,
Changed you dreams and desires to fit her needs,
Her wants.
You can't see that all she is is a bitter and hateful person.
She's not the person you once loved anymore.
You could never love me,
You would just see her every time.
Every time we touched, kissed, or even talked.
You would hear her voice,
Feel her touch.
Love her.
I can't take it anymore.
Loving you hurts too much,
The pain is too great, with little rewards, if any.
Just know that I would always love you, even if you don't love me.
I love you, My beautiful golden-eyed silver hanyou.
My Inuyasha.
*Author's POV*
And with that, Kagome plunged the arrow into her chest. Silently praying
for Miroku and Sango. Praying they would discover their love. Silently
praying for Shippou, he deserved a better mom, a better life than this.
All she left was the written poem explaining her anugish. Her love. And her
sorrow. She hoped they would understand. That was Kagome's last thought as
the darkness overtook her and she fell unconcious, slowly bleeding, she
would bleed to death. If no one came along.
~Back at the Camp~
Inuyasha's ears twitched. He frowned. Then his nose smelled blood. Not just
any blood. Kagome's blood! His eyes widened.
Noticing a disturbence in his friends behavior, Miroku decided to question
his friend.
"What is it Inuyasha? Is there a demon nearby? Maybe we should find
Kagome." Miroku asked worridly, Kagome was his friend, he didn't want
anything to happen to her.
Inuyasha slowly shook his head as he answered. "No, i-it's Kagome. I smell
her blood, and there's a lot of it." He replied shocked.
Sango looked up in fear at the Hanyou's words, "Then what are we standing
here for?! Kagome is our friend we HAVE to help her!" She cried as she
jumped onto Kirara.
Miroku and Inuyasha followed the worried demon exterminator. They didn't
want their friend hurt either.....
~In Kagome's Clearing~
The sight that met their eyes shook them to the very core.
Kagome, Their Kagome, had an arrow clenched in her hand, it was covered in
her blood. There was a note beside her other hand. It seemed to be a poem
or a letter, addressed to Inuyasha.
They were shocked. They couldn't believe that the cheerful, genki Kagome
that had left them only 30 minutes ago had did this!
It went against everything that they had come to know and love about her.
Seeing that she wasn't dead yet they took her to Kaede's. They were
determined to help their friend. Even if she wouldn't help herself. They
would find a way to make her realize that this wasn't the answer, that it
never was.
As Sango carried her bleeding friend to Kirara, she gave instructions to
the neko to take the girl to Kaede. The demon nodded in consent and quickly
left.
Inuyasha was looking at the poem. Kagome had told him about those, she said
it was a way to express feelings in words and it helped her explain her
emotions when speech failed her. The only thing that Inuyasha could
decipher was his name, that was as far as his reading skills went.
Miroku looked at Inuyasha and understood his friends delima.
"Inuyasha, would you like me to read it for you?" Miroku offered gently.
Inuyasha wordlessy nodded. He was to shocked to care if the others heard
Kagome's intended last words.
As Miroku read Inuyasha's eyes began to fill with tears, and he let his
hair fall to cover them. He never knew Kagome had felt this way. Never knew
the pain she had felt and went through. If only she had known, had been
brave enough to ask him.
Suddenly he understood now. She had probably thought he would have brushed
her off, rejected her and jeered at her. If only she had known, he silently
said, if only.
Miroku and Sango were again shocked at what their cheerful friend had felt.
They had known about her love, had tried to help her express it for their
'romantically dense' hanyou leader. But they never knew it was this deep,
had never known the intense pain she had felt, and she had never let on
about it, never. They then saw that on the other side was some advice.
Miroku cleared his throat, and read on.
Sango and Miroku blushed as Sango shyly looked at the monk and the Miroku
smiled sheepishly at her. The advice went as follows:
'Miroku, tell Sango your feelings, don't confide in me. You don't know that
she won't return them. You'd be surprised.
Sango, confess you love for Miroku, It's high time you should have. I think
that you'll be gratefull that you did.
Shippou, you deserve a better life, a better "mom". You can find a better
life than this, I don't deserve you, I truly loved your as my kit, but you
shouldn't be bound to someone who doesn't derserve you, you'd eventually
come to hate me.
Inuyasha, you already know my feelings and I yours. I wish you well and a
very happy life with your chosen beloved.
I love you all, please forgive me and at least take into consideration my
last words.'
They were speechless. It wasn't untill now that they remembered that
Shippou was asleep in Kagome's sleeping bag back at camp. They went to
retrieve their things and took them to teh village where their friend lay,
her body fighting for life, her mind resigned to death. They would see
which was stronger.
~In The Village~
Shippou was sobbing next to his adopted mom. He hadn't eaten or slept in
days. He refused all food and comforts untill he was sure Kagome would
live. Kaede tried her best but didn't have the heart to pull this young kit
away from it's chosen mother. She even had felt the loss, she had loved
this girl like a daughter and would have done her very best to help her is
she had asked. But she hadn't. She had bore the burden alone untill she
could take it no more. She had succumbed to the pain and attempted to kill
herself. Now they were praying for her to live, they were going to help her
through this and make her see that this was not the answer to the immense
pain she had felt, Only confession was the answer, she had to confront her
feelings and express them.
It was on the third day after the attempt that she stirred. Shippou, being
there day and night for three days with no food and little water, was the
first to know.
"INUYASHA! SANGO! MIROKU! KAEDE! SHE'S WAKING UP!" he yelled at the top of
his little, nourishment-deprived lungs. This of course only turned out to
be as loud as the average speaking voice but since the others were always
near-by in hopes of this happening, they heard him loud and clear.
They all rushed in as she opened her eyes. When she opened them the sight
that met her was not the intended after-life but the here and now with her
firends all around her looking at her with anxious eyes.
Her eyes filled with tears at the sight of her friemds in so much agony
over her.
"NO! I don't wanna live! I don't deserve to! All I do is cause you pain, I
don't want that! Please, just let me die!" She cried out pitifully in her
weak state.
Sango's eyes filled with tears, her friend had it all wrong, "No, Kagome-
chan, you DO deserve to live. You're the peace-maker, the cheerful one! You
give us hope for a new day, we souldn't live without you!" Sango exclaimed
as she burst into tears.
Miroku embraced her, comforting her, and for once not being perverted.
Sango surprisingly allowed it. That just showed Kagome how upset she was.
She just felt more guilty.
Her eyes must have expressed this, for Miroku added in his two yen in.
"Lady Sango is right. Without you Kagome-chan, we don't have the spring in
our step or the lift in hearts that we have grown so accustomed to. You
bring us that. We will help you whatever the cost." and with that he turned
back to thhe task at comforting the distressed Sango.
Even Kaede agreed, and said roughly the same thing. Though she still stood
by her earlier decision. Untill Shippou spoke his piece, then she started
to have second thoughts....
"Kagome! I don't want another life! I don't want another mommy! I want you!
Your the best Mommy in the world and I won't have anyone else!" The kitsune
exclaimed as he sat on her legs, as though to keep her from death.
Kagome mentally smiled at this. Though she quickly sent that mood away.
Then Inuyasha said the one thing that shook to the very bones, made her
heart stop. She looked at him as he stepped awkwardly forword. The others,
sensing something personal, quietly stepped out, and left the two their
privacy.
Inuyasha then said the very thing she never believed would happen, never,
never thought would come to pass. Her heart stopped and she froze, unable
to comprehend what he said.
"Kagome, I love you." He stated simply, with eyes filled with sorrow,
worry, and shockingly to Kagome, love.
Her eyes filled with tears as she attempted to hug the silver-haired
hanyou, "Oh! Inuyasha, I love you too! I always thought you loved kikyo, so
I never pressed, never pushed. Inuyasha, I love you completely with all my
heart and soul!" She exclaimed.
Inuyasha held her down, she shouldn't be getting up. She looked at him in
confusion and hurt.
" You shouldn't be getting up yet, your still frail from your injuries."
He stated in resonse to her expression in her eyes.
She nodded and in a small voice asked a question that touched his very
heart. "Oh. Okay then, would you at least hold me then untill I fall
asleep?" She asked pleadingly. He nodded wordlessly and situated her so she
could sleep against his chest and still be comfortable. She was soon asleep
but Inuyasha was to content to care. He held her all through the day and
when the others came in to check on her, the sight that met their eyes was
heartwarming. They quietly left the new couple, al except Shippou, who
curled up at Kagome's feet, taking a well-deserved rest. All was well in
the little cabin. But if only they knew how short this time would be....
At the same time in the hut next over, Sango was outside looking at the
night sky and silently wondering how to present her feelings to the monk
who stole her heart.
She didn't have long to think because soon the said monk came into veiw,
walking silently and appearing deep in thought. He stopped in front of
Sango. He then took her hand in his and brought a blush to Sango's cheeks
by his next statement.
"Sango, I think that in light of recent events, I should get this out in
the open and know your reaction.", he paused here and proceeded to look
deep into her brown eyes," Sango I love you. I love everything about you
and what you represent. I love the person you are and I hope you feel the
same way for me but if not I will understand. I will no longer bother you
with such statements if you don't feel the same."
He braced himself for a smack, but was surprised when she threw her arms
him and whispered into his neck.
"Miroku, I love you too! I just never knew what you would think! I'm so
happy!" Sango exclaimed joyously.
Miroku then decided to push his luck," Sango dear, would you consider
marrying me?" He looked anxiously at her.
"Yes, Let's go right this minute! If you want to that is." she questioned
worriedly.
Miroku smiled, "My dear, I wouldn't have it any other way." They then went
to Kaede who performed the ceremony. Miroku then carried his new wife into
their hut and silently closed the door.....
Nobody noticed a baboon skin wearing man silently laughing at this
profitable events. He now had the perfect plan to devestate this
troublesome group and hurt them deeply.......
Well there you have it, if you like it and want more reveiw I can make this
into a story if you want, It's just that my experience with readers is they
dislike my stories. oh well. if you like this will you at least read my
other story, 'Roses and dewdrops'? I love you all! lol. well all kinds of
reviews are welcome, even flames, for i have marshmellows and chocolate,
and even graham crackers! BUWAHAHAHA!!! I shall make s'mores with your
flames!!! Please review. tell me if you want more
*~Mizu~*
AN: Sometimes I just feel like writing something and when I do write it, I
end up looking at it like I wrote this?!! So please don't be too harsh even
though all opinions are welcome.
Disclaimer: If I did own Inuyasha, would I be posting this? NO! I would be
busy huggling Kouga and Miroku because my friends would attack me for
Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha. u.u; darn.
Why won't you look at me? I always wish that you would.
But you never do.
You have eyes only for her,
Only for her, you look right through me.
Right into the person I was once, in a past life.
My incarnate.
It's not fair.
I give my heart to you, bareing it on my sleeve,
Yet stillignore it, ignoring me in the process.
I am just a replacement for her,
I'm just a shard detector.Why won't you look at me? I always wish that you
would.
I'm nothing.
I'm giving up my school, my friends, my family to be here with you.
But you won't have me.
All you see is the person who took your first love.
Who manipulated you,
Changed you dreams and desires to fit her needs,
Her wants.
You can't see that all she is is a bitter and hateful person.
She's not the person you once loved anymore.
You could never love me,
You would just see her every time.
Every time we touched, kissed, or even talked.
You would hear her voice,
Feel her touch.
Love her.
I can't take it anymore.
Loving you hurts too much,
The pain is too great, with little rewards, if any.
Just know that I would always love you, even if you don't love me.
I love you, My beautiful golden-eyed silver hanyou.
My Inuyasha.
*Author's POV*
And with that, Kagome plunged the arrow into her chest. Silently praying
for Miroku and Sango. Praying they would discover their love. Silently
praying for Shippou, he deserved a better mom, a better life than this.
All she left was the written poem explaining her anugish. Her love. And her
sorrow. She hoped they would understand. That was Kagome's last thought as
the darkness overtook her and she fell unconcious, slowly bleeding, she
would bleed to death. If no one came along.
~Back at the Camp~
Inuyasha's ears twitched. He frowned. Then his nose smelled blood. Not just
any blood. Kagome's blood! His eyes widened.
Noticing a disturbence in his friends behavior, Miroku decided to question
his friend.
"What is it Inuyasha? Is there a demon nearby? Maybe we should find
Kagome." Miroku asked worridly, Kagome was his friend, he didn't want
anything to happen to her.
Inuyasha slowly shook his head as he answered. "No, i-it's Kagome. I smell
her blood, and there's a lot of it." He replied shocked.
Sango looked up in fear at the Hanyou's words, "Then what are we standing
here for?! Kagome is our friend we HAVE to help her!" She cried as she
jumped onto Kirara.
Miroku and Inuyasha followed the worried demon exterminator. They didn't
want their friend hurt either.....
~In Kagome's Clearing~
The sight that met their eyes shook them to the very core.
Kagome, Their Kagome, had an arrow clenched in her hand, it was covered in
her blood. There was a note beside her other hand. It seemed to be a poem
or a letter, addressed to Inuyasha.
They were shocked. They couldn't believe that the cheerful, genki Kagome
that had left them only 30 minutes ago had did this!
It went against everything that they had come to know and love about her.
Seeing that she wasn't dead yet they took her to Kaede's. They were
determined to help their friend. Even if she wouldn't help herself. They
would find a way to make her realize that this wasn't the answer, that it
never was.
As Sango carried her bleeding friend to Kirara, she gave instructions to
the neko to take the girl to Kaede. The demon nodded in consent and quickly
left.
Inuyasha was looking at the poem. Kagome had told him about those, she said
it was a way to express feelings in words and it helped her explain her
emotions when speech failed her. The only thing that Inuyasha could
decipher was his name, that was as far as his reading skills went.
Miroku looked at Inuyasha and understood his friends delima.
"Inuyasha, would you like me to read it for you?" Miroku offered gently.
Inuyasha wordlessy nodded. He was to shocked to care if the others heard
Kagome's intended last words.
As Miroku read Inuyasha's eyes began to fill with tears, and he let his
hair fall to cover them. He never knew Kagome had felt this way. Never knew
the pain she had felt and went through. If only she had known, had been
brave enough to ask him.
Suddenly he understood now. She had probably thought he would have brushed
her off, rejected her and jeered at her. If only she had known, he silently
said, if only.
Miroku and Sango were again shocked at what their cheerful friend had felt.
They had known about her love, had tried to help her express it for their
'romantically dense' hanyou leader. But they never knew it was this deep,
had never known the intense pain she had felt, and she had never let on
about it, never. They then saw that on the other side was some advice.
Miroku cleared his throat, and read on.
Sango and Miroku blushed as Sango shyly looked at the monk and the Miroku
smiled sheepishly at her. The advice went as follows:
'Miroku, tell Sango your feelings, don't confide in me. You don't know that
she won't return them. You'd be surprised.
Sango, confess you love for Miroku, It's high time you should have. I think
that you'll be gratefull that you did.
Shippou, you deserve a better life, a better "mom". You can find a better
life than this, I don't deserve you, I truly loved your as my kit, but you
shouldn't be bound to someone who doesn't derserve you, you'd eventually
come to hate me.
Inuyasha, you already know my feelings and I yours. I wish you well and a
very happy life with your chosen beloved.
I love you all, please forgive me and at least take into consideration my
last words.'
They were speechless. It wasn't untill now that they remembered that
Shippou was asleep in Kagome's sleeping bag back at camp. They went to
retrieve their things and took them to teh village where their friend lay,
her body fighting for life, her mind resigned to death. They would see
which was stronger.
~In The Village~
Shippou was sobbing next to his adopted mom. He hadn't eaten or slept in
days. He refused all food and comforts untill he was sure Kagome would
live. Kaede tried her best but didn't have the heart to pull this young kit
away from it's chosen mother. She even had felt the loss, she had loved
this girl like a daughter and would have done her very best to help her is
she had asked. But she hadn't. She had bore the burden alone untill she
could take it no more. She had succumbed to the pain and attempted to kill
herself. Now they were praying for her to live, they were going to help her
through this and make her see that this was not the answer to the immense
pain she had felt, Only confession was the answer, she had to confront her
feelings and express them.
It was on the third day after the attempt that she stirred. Shippou, being
there day and night for three days with no food and little water, was the
first to know.
"INUYASHA! SANGO! MIROKU! KAEDE! SHE'S WAKING UP!" he yelled at the top of
his little, nourishment-deprived lungs. This of course only turned out to
be as loud as the average speaking voice but since the others were always
near-by in hopes of this happening, they heard him loud and clear.
They all rushed in as she opened her eyes. When she opened them the sight
that met her was not the intended after-life but the here and now with her
firends all around her looking at her with anxious eyes.
Her eyes filled with tears at the sight of her friemds in so much agony
over her.
"NO! I don't wanna live! I don't deserve to! All I do is cause you pain, I
don't want that! Please, just let me die!" She cried out pitifully in her
weak state.
Sango's eyes filled with tears, her friend had it all wrong, "No, Kagome-
chan, you DO deserve to live. You're the peace-maker, the cheerful one! You
give us hope for a new day, we souldn't live without you!" Sango exclaimed
as she burst into tears.
Miroku embraced her, comforting her, and for once not being perverted.
Sango surprisingly allowed it. That just showed Kagome how upset she was.
She just felt more guilty.
Her eyes must have expressed this, for Miroku added in his two yen in.
"Lady Sango is right. Without you Kagome-chan, we don't have the spring in
our step or the lift in hearts that we have grown so accustomed to. You
bring us that. We will help you whatever the cost." and with that he turned
back to thhe task at comforting the distressed Sango.
Even Kaede agreed, and said roughly the same thing. Though she still stood
by her earlier decision. Untill Shippou spoke his piece, then she started
to have second thoughts....
"Kagome! I don't want another life! I don't want another mommy! I want you!
Your the best Mommy in the world and I won't have anyone else!" The kitsune
exclaimed as he sat on her legs, as though to keep her from death.
Kagome mentally smiled at this. Though she quickly sent that mood away.
Then Inuyasha said the one thing that shook to the very bones, made her
heart stop. She looked at him as he stepped awkwardly forword. The others,
sensing something personal, quietly stepped out, and left the two their
privacy.
Inuyasha then said the very thing she never believed would happen, never,
never thought would come to pass. Her heart stopped and she froze, unable
to comprehend what he said.
"Kagome, I love you." He stated simply, with eyes filled with sorrow,
worry, and shockingly to Kagome, love.
Her eyes filled with tears as she attempted to hug the silver-haired
hanyou, "Oh! Inuyasha, I love you too! I always thought you loved kikyo, so
I never pressed, never pushed. Inuyasha, I love you completely with all my
heart and soul!" She exclaimed.
Inuyasha held her down, she shouldn't be getting up. She looked at him in
confusion and hurt.
" You shouldn't be getting up yet, your still frail from your injuries."
He stated in resonse to her expression in her eyes.
She nodded and in a small voice asked a question that touched his very
heart. "Oh. Okay then, would you at least hold me then untill I fall
asleep?" She asked pleadingly. He nodded wordlessly and situated her so she
could sleep against his chest and still be comfortable. She was soon asleep
but Inuyasha was to content to care. He held her all through the day and
when the others came in to check on her, the sight that met their eyes was
heartwarming. They quietly left the new couple, al except Shippou, who
curled up at Kagome's feet, taking a well-deserved rest. All was well in
the little cabin. But if only they knew how short this time would be....
At the same time in the hut next over, Sango was outside looking at the
night sky and silently wondering how to present her feelings to the monk
who stole her heart.
She didn't have long to think because soon the said monk came into veiw,
walking silently and appearing deep in thought. He stopped in front of
Sango. He then took her hand in his and brought a blush to Sango's cheeks
by his next statement.
"Sango, I think that in light of recent events, I should get this out in
the open and know your reaction.", he paused here and proceeded to look
deep into her brown eyes," Sango I love you. I love everything about you
and what you represent. I love the person you are and I hope you feel the
same way for me but if not I will understand. I will no longer bother you
with such statements if you don't feel the same."
He braced himself for a smack, but was surprised when she threw her arms
him and whispered into his neck.
"Miroku, I love you too! I just never knew what you would think! I'm so
happy!" Sango exclaimed joyously.
Miroku then decided to push his luck," Sango dear, would you consider
marrying me?" He looked anxiously at her.
"Yes, Let's go right this minute! If you want to that is." she questioned
worriedly.
Miroku smiled, "My dear, I wouldn't have it any other way." They then went
to Kaede who performed the ceremony. Miroku then carried his new wife into
their hut and silently closed the door.....
Nobody noticed a baboon skin wearing man silently laughing at this
profitable events. He now had the perfect plan to devestate this
troublesome group and hurt them deeply.......
Well there you have it, if you like it and want more reveiw I can make this
into a story if you want, It's just that my experience with readers is they
dislike my stories. oh well. if you like this will you at least read my
other story, 'Roses and dewdrops'? I love you all! lol. well all kinds of
reviews are welcome, even flames, for i have marshmellows and chocolate,
and even graham crackers! BUWAHAHAHA!!! I shall make s'mores with your
flames!!! Please review. tell me if you want more
*~Mizu~*