Authors Notes: I do not own One Piece or it affiliates, Yay, another
fanfiction! This idea just popped in my head when I was watching TV, and I
thought: This stuff could make a wicked funny fanfiction! So here it is,
ladies, gentlemen, and all those others in-between, I present to you:
Channel Surfing
Channel-0: The original One Piece Universe
(The ocean, duh, more specifically, the Grand line. Everything is nice, and calm, and peaceful on the Going Merry.)
Sanji (steps out onto the deck and looks around.): Ohhh Luuffyy.
Luffy (huddled in a corner, eating of course.): ....
Sanji (stakes slow steps making sure to look every where.): Where you? I know you're around here some where.... le marmot de chapeau de paille!
(He is a French cook after all.)
Luffy (beads of sweat roll down his forehead, and he pauses his munching.):..........
Sanji (still looking for the well hidden kid.): Sort, est sorti, où jamais vous êtes...
(Okay... I have no idea what he just said.)
Luffy (swallows masticated food with a huge gulp): Mmmm
(Masticate: to grind or crush (food) with or as if with the teeth in preparation for swallowing: Chew –Webster's Dictionary-)
Sanji (finally finds the mischievous little demon child.): Aha!!! There you are!
Luffy (on being found out gives a nervous smile.): Oh, hey Sanji...
Sanji (giving a 'warm' smile.): Captain, something strange has happened.
Luffy (looking of to the side.): Strange?
Sanji (still with his creepy 'warm' smile.): A week's supply of food has 'mysteriously' vanished.
Luffy (begins to sweat profusely.): Really?
Sanji (bends over so that his face meets with the captain's. still with creepy 'warm' smile plastered on his face.): YOU wouldn't know anything about it would you?
Luffy (soaking wet now.)... Sanji (warm smile goes away now.): What's that around your mouth?
Luffy (nearly drowning in his own bodily secretions.): OH CRAP! I FORGOT TO WIPE MY MOUTH!!!
(Of course, there is nothing around Luffy's mouth. With one swift kick the rubber boy is sent gliding across the well polished deck. Crap, I was hoping for splinters! Okay I lied about the nice...and I lied about the calm...and the peaceful too...)
Sanji (lights a cigarette and exhales adding to the weakening of the ozone layer.): Idiot.
(Nami runs down the steps. She falls to wooden deck, nearly breaking her neck. Total terror is in her eyes and her breath gone.)
Sanji (worried about his beloved rushes to her side and helps her up.): Nami-san what is it?
Nami (ignores the blond and rushes to the middle of the deck.): Everyone, you gotta check this out!!
(Ussop puts away his fishing pole, Zoro pauses from his training, Nico sets aside her book, Copper puts down his test tubes, and Luffy get up form the floor with an acrobatic leap.)
Zoro: What's wrong?
Nami (regains her breath.): The sky up ahead is an unusual color. I've never seen a storm like this!
(The sky before them is a strange shade of purple, the clouds are warped, and lightning could be seen all around. Ooooo, I can feel the suspense.)
Nico (goes to the rail to get a closer look at the unnatural phenomenon.): In all my years on the sea I've never witnessed such an event!
Luffy: The sky's all funny looking.
Ussop: We're all going to die!!!!
(Some where else...On a Marine Ship, Smoker is in his office puffing away at his cigars. Tashigi stumbles in, trips over her self and lands face first on her commanding officer's desk.)
Smoker (agitated at the ditsyiness of his subordinate): Honestly you might as well be a blond! What the emergency?!
Tashigi (peels face off the desk.): Smoker sir, you have to come see this! It's the sky!
Smoker (raises an eyebrow in disgust.): The sky...
Tashigi (regains her composure.): The sky...is looks strange!!
(Okay I see this scene change isn't going any ware. Next scene: Red beards pirate ship. The sky is looking weirder and more warped by the second. Shanks is looking up at the foreboding sky.)
Shanks (takes a whiff of the air and get tens look in his eyes.): The air...the air reeks of death.
(Ben runs up to the captain.)
Ben (covering his nose and mouth.): Captain, Lucky Roo just ripped one.
Shanks (takes another whiff of the foul air then coughs.): Man, what has the guy been eating?
Ben: Anyway, the ship seems to getting sucked into this strange storm. The sails are up and the wind is gone. This is really strange...
(Okay I'm starting to get bored now. So in conclusion the whole One Piece universe is being sucked into some strange vortex thingy. So now our feature presentation...)
Channel Surfing
Channel-0: The original One Piece Universe
(The ocean, duh, more specifically, the Grand line. Everything is nice, and calm, and peaceful on the Going Merry.)
Sanji (steps out onto the deck and looks around.): Ohhh Luuffyy.
Luffy (huddled in a corner, eating of course.): ....
Sanji (stakes slow steps making sure to look every where.): Where you? I know you're around here some where.... le marmot de chapeau de paille!
(He is a French cook after all.)
Luffy (beads of sweat roll down his forehead, and he pauses his munching.):..........
Sanji (still looking for the well hidden kid.): Sort, est sorti, où jamais vous êtes...
(Okay... I have no idea what he just said.)
Luffy (swallows masticated food with a huge gulp): Mmmm
(Masticate: to grind or crush (food) with or as if with the teeth in preparation for swallowing: Chew –Webster's Dictionary-)
Sanji (finally finds the mischievous little demon child.): Aha!!! There you are!
Luffy (on being found out gives a nervous smile.): Oh, hey Sanji...
Sanji (giving a 'warm' smile.): Captain, something strange has happened.
Luffy (looking of to the side.): Strange?
Sanji (still with his creepy 'warm' smile.): A week's supply of food has 'mysteriously' vanished.
Luffy (begins to sweat profusely.): Really?
Sanji (bends over so that his face meets with the captain's. still with creepy 'warm' smile plastered on his face.): YOU wouldn't know anything about it would you?
Luffy (soaking wet now.)... Sanji (warm smile goes away now.): What's that around your mouth?
Luffy (nearly drowning in his own bodily secretions.): OH CRAP! I FORGOT TO WIPE MY MOUTH!!!
(Of course, there is nothing around Luffy's mouth. With one swift kick the rubber boy is sent gliding across the well polished deck. Crap, I was hoping for splinters! Okay I lied about the nice...and I lied about the calm...and the peaceful too...)
Sanji (lights a cigarette and exhales adding to the weakening of the ozone layer.): Idiot.
(Nami runs down the steps. She falls to wooden deck, nearly breaking her neck. Total terror is in her eyes and her breath gone.)
Sanji (worried about his beloved rushes to her side and helps her up.): Nami-san what is it?
Nami (ignores the blond and rushes to the middle of the deck.): Everyone, you gotta check this out!!
(Ussop puts away his fishing pole, Zoro pauses from his training, Nico sets aside her book, Copper puts down his test tubes, and Luffy get up form the floor with an acrobatic leap.)
Zoro: What's wrong?
Nami (regains her breath.): The sky up ahead is an unusual color. I've never seen a storm like this!
(The sky before them is a strange shade of purple, the clouds are warped, and lightning could be seen all around. Ooooo, I can feel the suspense.)
Nico (goes to the rail to get a closer look at the unnatural phenomenon.): In all my years on the sea I've never witnessed such an event!
Luffy: The sky's all funny looking.
Ussop: We're all going to die!!!!
(Some where else...On a Marine Ship, Smoker is in his office puffing away at his cigars. Tashigi stumbles in, trips over her self and lands face first on her commanding officer's desk.)
Smoker (agitated at the ditsyiness of his subordinate): Honestly you might as well be a blond! What the emergency?!
Tashigi (peels face off the desk.): Smoker sir, you have to come see this! It's the sky!
Smoker (raises an eyebrow in disgust.): The sky...
Tashigi (regains her composure.): The sky...is looks strange!!
(Okay I see this scene change isn't going any ware. Next scene: Red beards pirate ship. The sky is looking weirder and more warped by the second. Shanks is looking up at the foreboding sky.)
Shanks (takes a whiff of the air and get tens look in his eyes.): The air...the air reeks of death.
(Ben runs up to the captain.)
Ben (covering his nose and mouth.): Captain, Lucky Roo just ripped one.
Shanks (takes another whiff of the foul air then coughs.): Man, what has the guy been eating?
Ben: Anyway, the ship seems to getting sucked into this strange storm. The sails are up and the wind is gone. This is really strange...
(Okay I'm starting to get bored now. So in conclusion the whole One Piece universe is being sucked into some strange vortex thingy. So now our feature presentation...)