Disclaimer: I do not own anything. No gundam. No Heero. And no Duo. Unfortunately.
Chapter 2: Midnight kiss
"Where did you go, Heero?" He just held her from behind as she put down her hair brush. His chin resting on her shoulder as he nibbled and teased her earlobe. Of course he wouldn't answer her. What did he owe her? Nothing. Even though he never said it, she assumed that's how he felt. The lash out between her and Duo was now a memory. She didn't think about it. Duo bitterly called her later that night asking if she was alright. She said of course, Heero was with her after all. No physical harm could come to her. She obviously didn't know what he meant. Holding her wrists to her sides, he kissed her neck. Turning her around, he began to kiss her lips, her cheeks, her jaw line, down her neck, and back up to her lips. Loving and missing his kisses, she kissed him back. Always the one to be dominant, he pulled her backwards towards the bed. With her heart racing, she followed not sure of what he had in mind.
"Why do you taste so good?" He mumbled against her throat. They were now both laying on the bed , him on top of her, hold her wrists above her head. Basically trapping her under him. Trying to get out of his hold her on, she sought his lips once again, playfully biting his lower lip. Groaning against her lips, he let go of one wrist, knowing she wanted to touch him. Her hand went straight to his unruly hair, fisting it and urgently pushing him towards her lips more. The power he hand on her was immense. It was destructive. It was dangerous. It was blinding. Her other wrist was wriggling, wanting to seize more of his soft hair.
"Let me go, Heero."
Let me go…. .Day after day she locks herself in her office. No one could ever break through to her. No one except for one person. The same person who caused her anti social behavior. The only person to take her heart. The only person to break it.
"Are you okay?" Duo stood by her door. Relena was once again sitting beside her office window overlooking the people on the streets. She never did see the woman from before.
'Probably with her perfect boyfriend.' She thought bitterly. She heard Duo, but like the other times Heero left, she did not feel like talking to anybody. Wanting to be left alone, that's how she felt. Heero went away again, this time he stayed for only a day. It's been two months since he left. Why did he leave so soon? Didn't he know how powerful his hold on her was? How powerful his kisses was? That night, like every night he stayed with her they only kissed and held each other. But how she wanted more, more nights, more kisses, more. He was a poison to her. A poison she was addicted to. A poison she felt if she didn't get enough she would die from withdrawal. It was cruel to leave her like he did. She knew it but still wanted him back in her office, in her bed, in her arms. He even left before she woke up, the both of them not being able to say goodbye. Her eyebrow lifted in amusement. Why in the hell would he say goodbye to her? In the past he never did. What made this time different?
Duo stepped closer to her desk with a glass full of water in his left hand. Relena was too lost in her own thoughts to notice that Duo was now beside her. He held her shoulder firmly, turning her towards him.
"Drink this." The pill he held out in his right hand was pink. Numbly she took it as well as the water, knowing it was probably something that would help her sleep. Backing away from Relena, Duo knew that she needed her space. What she also needed was Heero. But he was too stupid to realize that. In the two months that he left, she's the life she used to have in her eyes and doesn't speak to anyone. Not even to her own brother. Everyone has tried to figure out what was wrong, but only Duo really knew. As a friend, he would never say anything to anyone. But sometimes, when he saw her like this, he wanted to scream it to everyone. Maybe someone could help her. Maybe she was too far gone.
Her hands started to shake as tears filled her eyes. All the thoughts running through her head was too much for her already fragile mind. Any thought that ran through her mind involved Heero. 'Where is he? Why did he go? Will he come back? When will he come back? Why did he come back in the first place? It was cluttering in her mind, confusing her, angering her.
Before Duo reach the doors her glass was thrown against it with a scream, almost hitting him. As the shards of glass littered the floor, her sobs were heard for the first time. All her defenses were on the floor along with the shards, along with her broken heart. Duo turned around to her crouched down with her head on her lap, hands covering her head. Mumbles were heard coming through her shaking figure. Scared to come closer to her, he stayed where he stood. After a few shaky attempts, Relena spoke.
"Why?" Was all she whispered . But Duo knew what she was trying to say. Not sure if he did know what she was trying to say, she continued. " Why am I so weak? Why do I continuously do this to myself?" Her body now trembling with sobs. Duo walked up to her and kneeled down in front of her, taking one of her hands.
"If you never want to see him again, you could do it. But if you keep saying yes. Then what else are you going to expect? He will keep going and coming and you'll keep accepting and forgiving until he never comes back. Then what? You'll kill yourself with plaguing thoughts." Carefully, he said. Had he scolded her like last time, it would do no good for her. She would just continue to cry and repeat her mistakes. Embracing him, she cried onto his shoulder, muttering I know over and over again. Her sobs lessened and soon she stopped all together, moving away from him. His legs now asleep from kneeling for so long, he sat on the floor rubbing his legs. As if she never broke down and cried, she sat up straight and stared numbly past Duo. A shiver ran through her spine and she turned her chair away from Duo.
"Can you leave me alone for now?" She asked quietly. Her voice a haunting echo of despair. Knowing that her sudden break down didn't help anything, he complied. Rising from the ground, he nodded his head. Her eyes looked tired, her body still shaking slightly from her cruel sobs. All in all, she looked defeated, destroyed like she was dying. All due to a certain cerulean eyed boy. Biting her lip from yelling out in pain, she bowed her head away from Duo sight so that he wouldn't see her teary eyes. After Duo left, she couldn't hold back the sobs that continued on until midnight. The pills didn't work. Tomorrow night he would get something stronger for her. Everything that she was feeling, came out that night through her tears. By the end of it, she felt like she had no more tears to shed. Heero was still in her memory, and her heart. And she would endlessly cry for him. She would find the tears to cry for him.
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Throughout the night Duo would knock on her door to check on her. The only response he heard was her whimpered "I'm fine.", he decided to leave her tonight. Duo had to find Heero, drag him back here. Tell her that he didn't love her. Tell her that he did love her. Tell her something. But to leave her hanging like this. It was too much for someone who was madly in love. Duo and Heero had fights about the subject. Heero would not want to talk about, not giving a clear I love her, I don't love her. He was as unclear as Duo was. Heero didn't seem to know either. But only Heero knew for sure.
Last month Duo heard that Heero was in some colony helping control terrorist attacks. He should have been back from now. Quatre was with Heero and came back a week ago. Where the hell was Heero. With a bog sigh, Duo knocked on Relena door once again. It was close to one in the morning and she was still in there, probably still crying. The person who came out the door was not who he expected. It was Trowa. Last he heard Trowa was with his sister in the circus.
"Hey clown." Duo amusedly said. Trowa clad in a beige trench coat covering his shirt and pants, shut the door quietly.
"She's very hurt. I came to check up on something and found her crying. Is it because of Heero?" His voice just above a whisper. For a quiet guy, Trowa was very observant. Duo nodded with a frown. It was rare to see the living jokester frown or get mad. "I'm sad for her. I want to make sure she feels better. She is a gentle per…" Duo cut him off and grabbed his shoulders.
"If you want to help her, tell me where Heero is. The dumbass keeps running away and won't tell her if she's wasting her time with him or not!" His voice raising in excitement. The door opening made Duo clamp his mouth shut. A tired eyed Relena stepped out and walked past the two Gundam pilots without a word. The two eyed each other and decided to follow. Duo and Trowa followed behind slowly, letting Relena have her space. When she reached the elevator door, she turned around to face Duo and Trowa.
"I'm all right guys. Really. I just need to go to sleep." Her eyes rimming with tears. Duo once again frowned, wishing he could maintain his smile but failed. Trowa on the other hand stepped forward and grasped Relena shoulders, pulling her into a hug. The masculine circus performer took Relena by surprise and stood frozen. He rubbed her back as her defenses started to melt, relishing in the warmth of a man. Slowly her hands made their way to his waist, her tears now flowing once again. Deciding Duo should let them talk or whatever, he took the stairs to make sure her car was ready for her.
Tired of sobbing, she tried not cry. Trowa's hands massaged the small of back, much like Heero used to do. Relaxing more into him, she laid her head on the crook of his neck. Leaning his head back enough, he kissed her forehead. His soft lips feeling good on her skin.
"Forget, like I said. Forget. Welcome someone else into your life and forget the past." He murmured against her skin. Looking up at him unthinkingly, their lips almost touched. His hot breath was hitting her lips. Two months was all she thought. Two months without comfort. Two months without his kisses. Two months without a touch, nothing. She needed, wanted, yearned. On impulse, she closed the gap between them. A chaste kiss. A start. A beginning. A chance to forget. Maybe that was her problem. There was no other man in her life, if she did have one, she'd forget about him. Trowa could help her. Not helping but to kiss back the retired princess, he held her closer to him. Her hands went up to his hair, like she would do with Heero. Though he was a quite and passive, his kisses were far from it. Hungry, wanting, just like her kisses were becoming. Had he felt something for her and she didn't notice? From the way he was kissing her, it seemed like he was waiting for it all his life. The elevator door opened with a ding. After the ding she realized what she was doing, what was happening. Her hands going form holding his hair, pulling him closer to her. His hands were roaming her backside, massaging her back and crumpling her jacket. A tear of two cascading down her flushed cheeks. The both of them in front of the elevator doors for anyone to walk in and see. They looked like lovers, caught in the heat of passion.
'God. What am I doing? This isn't right.' Relena's moral side was protesting the whole scenario. Trowa was far beyond handsome, any girl in her right mind would dream about kissing him. His powerful kisses. But she was toying with Trowa. She felt nothing for him and knew she was playing with him. Much like Heero was doing to her. It wasn't fair. Not to her, and not to Trowa. Moving her lips from his lips to his jaw line and finally to the shell of his ear, she whispered an apology.
"I'm sorry, Trowa. I can't do this to you. I can't play you like Heero is doing to me. It hurts. I'm sorry." Strangely her eyes didn't tear up. She wasn't sad. She was angry. Angry at what Heero turned her into. Someone so dependent on kisses and hugs. Someone who was willing to be hurt over and over again. Someone who would use someone else for her needs. Someone who just wanted. Someone who she was beginning to hate. Trowa on the other hand did hear what she said, but saw something or someone that made him stiffen slightly. Trowa was always known as a fearless man, but something made him actually stiffen. Letting go of Relena's waist, she took the chance to turn around. What she saw made her heart skip.
.............................He is the only one who had the power to make her heart do that
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Ahh… Aren't you guys proud?! The last sentence was from the last chapter. I can't tell you guys how happy I was to get reviews. For that once person who reviewed and said it isn't about reviews but about being an artist. I do consider myself an artist through and through. Not only with just writing, but with countless other ways that I do express myself artistically. So that offended me, wither or not you meant to or not. As an artist I do wish to get feedback. I need to know if you guys reading do appreciate my work and wish for me to continue, after all I am doing this for your entertainment and mine. I am the kind of person who if she doesn't get feedback I won't feel inspired to finish because I don't know if it is up to par with other stories or not. So I do need something to keep me going. I love the fact that you guys took the time to review, I can't tell you enough how glad I felt when you guys did review. As for that one reviewer, I mean no upset, I'm just explaining myself. Thank you so much for the review and I will keep what you said in mind. There was your continuation of the story, bad, good? Change, delete, keep as is? I'm not sure if I'm satisfied with this chapter so tell me if you guys like it, if not then I could redo it. Thanks!!