(A/N: I suppose I opened my big mouth about Malon, so I have to put her in
soon. :P yeah, the okareena part is god-awful pathetic and insignificant. I
know. But do I care? Not enough right now. My inspiration has abandoned me.
Btw, the entire time link is player-bashing, he's thinking it. can't have
him talking in Z64, now can we? Also, people would get awful suspicious if
he started saying stuff like this)
Okareena was up to play. His player usually went straight to business, which gave him lots of free time in between.
After whacking his way through the town, (luckily for the redeads, this player didn't discriminate, he only hit the ones in his way) okareena trekked across the field. He wondered what the player was up to, and then he saw the ranch come up. He grinned.
While link liked Saria, okareena opted for a homier individual.
He tried hard to focus on playing his part around Malon, and then headed to the pen. After winning a flawless victory in the race, okareena and epona leaped the fence. In the field, okareena was wary. The horse never did like him much. The player had him go back into the ranch afterward, talking to everybody, and then saved and quit.
Okareena and link waved in passing as someone else picked up the game.
Link dreaded what else he might have to do. The player had avoided the shadow temple so far, even completing the spirit temple, but there wasn't much else to do. Almost all the side quests were done by now.
He played the minuet of forest, and leisurely picked off moblin guards, then hopped the hedge to the lost woods. He dove into the pool, coming up in the other end by zora's domain. Shivering, he jumped into the cave, and trekked all the way up to king zora's chamber and out to the fountain. He looked around, and then looked down the waterfall.
'Yeah, woo hoo... a waterfall. Yippee.' He thought, not impressed.
Then he went back inside, and took the side tunnel from king zora's chamber to the inner waterfall. He looked down its length.
'yeah, a FROZEN waterfall. Fascinating.'
The player paused, and equipped the hover boots.
'what the...?'
Horrified, link ran back into ankle-deep water, and then ran off the edge of the frozen falls. He ran in the air like some pathetic cartoon, and then plummeted. He braced for the landing, but the player sent him into a roll at the last minute. Boy, this person wore on his nerves sometimes.
He then climbed the ladder, and leaped into the cold river. He ducked the octorok stones for the most part, deflecting only a few he couldn't dive under. He swam as far down the current as he could, and then climbed out and walked around the castle front to dive back into the water on the other side.
'what the heck is she doing?'
The water ended again, so he got out of the river and he ran without stopping into the gerudo valley.
'oh, no...'
he took a running leap into the valley, in a swan dive. Suddenly, he halted. He was floating upside-down between the valley walls.
'ehh? Oh, she thinks she's so funny with that borrowed gameshark.'
(lol, I play for hours like this.)
Staying in this uncomfortable position, link floated towards the headwaters, and then dropped into the waterfall basin, equipping the iron boots, but not the zora tunic.
'what kind of SICKO is she?'
after dodging a few boulders, the player equipped the zora tunic.
'finally.'
He freely thought an inappropriate name, and walked down the length of the valley underwater, occasionally getting bumped into by a boulder. They had to be heavy to stay underwater, so they did hurt when they hit.
'learn to see 'em coming would ya?'
link walked down into lake hylia, and then walked up towards the lab, standing underwater beneath the bridge. (this doesn't always work, but it has happened to me) with some luring maneuvers and proper timing, he got a guay to dive in after him. At first he was shocked, but it ended up amusing. The bird hit a certain depth and flew back out. Then he walked through the shallows, still in over his head in water, and taunted some tektites.
'sorry, man.' He mentally apologized as he stunned and ran away from the creature.
The player had him play the nocturne of shadow. Here it came. He had stepped into it just briefly before to get the hover boots, but now he had to go through it. He braced himself as he entered. But the player had neglected to fill the magic meter. About two seconds into the stone bird puzzle, it gave out, leaving link surrounded with a bunch of illusionary torch heads, and nothing to tell which was right. every time previous to this, the player had come prepared and done it right the first time. even link wondered what the 'descent into deep darkness' truly was. He stood there, waiting for something to happen, but there was nothing. He went to walk away, and the floor suddenly opened beneath him, the darkness beneath swallowing him.
Link shuddered as he was put back at the entrance. Still with an empty magic meter, the player had him at it again. This time, he stood perfectly still, and the player suddenly set him running. He almost made it to the edge in time, but fell anyway. He twitched a little. Deep pitfall deaths were possibly the most common, and his least favorite. Especially here, of all places.
'if I could get my hands on her....'
this time, she equipped him with the hover boots. He added extra effort this time, and hovered clear away from the pit. He stepped a little closer to the edge, and peered downward. She accidentally jarred the control stick, and he hovered in place before either of them realized, and fell into the dark depths a third time.
this time, he felt like curling up somewhere and hiding, but it wasn't to be. he almost cried with relief as he played the prelude of light and left the temple. To his ultimate relief, she saved and quit.
He staggered out of the game area, and Ganondorf met up with him.
"link, you okay? You're pale."
Link shivered and gave him an exasperated look.
"have I ever told you how much I hate that psychopath?"
Ganondorf couldn't help but chuckle.
"on multiple occasions."
Link unsheathed his sword.
"what's so funny?" he demanded, and beat on Ganondorf with the harmless prop.
(A/N: I know this is more 'when the N64 is on', but I just thought you'd enjoy my bizarre gameplaying tendencies. I have tested various methods of escaping the stone bird's pit, I always did it right the first time until the one day I decided to find out, purely by curious choice, and I have followed the water around hyrule from its source to its end. I must have no life.)
Okareena was up to play. His player usually went straight to business, which gave him lots of free time in between.
After whacking his way through the town, (luckily for the redeads, this player didn't discriminate, he only hit the ones in his way) okareena trekked across the field. He wondered what the player was up to, and then he saw the ranch come up. He grinned.
While link liked Saria, okareena opted for a homier individual.
He tried hard to focus on playing his part around Malon, and then headed to the pen. After winning a flawless victory in the race, okareena and epona leaped the fence. In the field, okareena was wary. The horse never did like him much. The player had him go back into the ranch afterward, talking to everybody, and then saved and quit.
Okareena and link waved in passing as someone else picked up the game.
Link dreaded what else he might have to do. The player had avoided the shadow temple so far, even completing the spirit temple, but there wasn't much else to do. Almost all the side quests were done by now.
He played the minuet of forest, and leisurely picked off moblin guards, then hopped the hedge to the lost woods. He dove into the pool, coming up in the other end by zora's domain. Shivering, he jumped into the cave, and trekked all the way up to king zora's chamber and out to the fountain. He looked around, and then looked down the waterfall.
'Yeah, woo hoo... a waterfall. Yippee.' He thought, not impressed.
Then he went back inside, and took the side tunnel from king zora's chamber to the inner waterfall. He looked down its length.
'yeah, a FROZEN waterfall. Fascinating.'
The player paused, and equipped the hover boots.
'what the...?'
Horrified, link ran back into ankle-deep water, and then ran off the edge of the frozen falls. He ran in the air like some pathetic cartoon, and then plummeted. He braced for the landing, but the player sent him into a roll at the last minute. Boy, this person wore on his nerves sometimes.
He then climbed the ladder, and leaped into the cold river. He ducked the octorok stones for the most part, deflecting only a few he couldn't dive under. He swam as far down the current as he could, and then climbed out and walked around the castle front to dive back into the water on the other side.
'what the heck is she doing?'
The water ended again, so he got out of the river and he ran without stopping into the gerudo valley.
'oh, no...'
he took a running leap into the valley, in a swan dive. Suddenly, he halted. He was floating upside-down between the valley walls.
'ehh? Oh, she thinks she's so funny with that borrowed gameshark.'
(lol, I play for hours like this.)
Staying in this uncomfortable position, link floated towards the headwaters, and then dropped into the waterfall basin, equipping the iron boots, but not the zora tunic.
'what kind of SICKO is she?'
after dodging a few boulders, the player equipped the zora tunic.
'finally.'
He freely thought an inappropriate name, and walked down the length of the valley underwater, occasionally getting bumped into by a boulder. They had to be heavy to stay underwater, so they did hurt when they hit.
'learn to see 'em coming would ya?'
link walked down into lake hylia, and then walked up towards the lab, standing underwater beneath the bridge. (this doesn't always work, but it has happened to me) with some luring maneuvers and proper timing, he got a guay to dive in after him. At first he was shocked, but it ended up amusing. The bird hit a certain depth and flew back out. Then he walked through the shallows, still in over his head in water, and taunted some tektites.
'sorry, man.' He mentally apologized as he stunned and ran away from the creature.
The player had him play the nocturne of shadow. Here it came. He had stepped into it just briefly before to get the hover boots, but now he had to go through it. He braced himself as he entered. But the player had neglected to fill the magic meter. About two seconds into the stone bird puzzle, it gave out, leaving link surrounded with a bunch of illusionary torch heads, and nothing to tell which was right. every time previous to this, the player had come prepared and done it right the first time. even link wondered what the 'descent into deep darkness' truly was. He stood there, waiting for something to happen, but there was nothing. He went to walk away, and the floor suddenly opened beneath him, the darkness beneath swallowing him.
Link shuddered as he was put back at the entrance. Still with an empty magic meter, the player had him at it again. This time, he stood perfectly still, and the player suddenly set him running. He almost made it to the edge in time, but fell anyway. He twitched a little. Deep pitfall deaths were possibly the most common, and his least favorite. Especially here, of all places.
'if I could get my hands on her....'
this time, she equipped him with the hover boots. He added extra effort this time, and hovered clear away from the pit. He stepped a little closer to the edge, and peered downward. She accidentally jarred the control stick, and he hovered in place before either of them realized, and fell into the dark depths a third time.
this time, he felt like curling up somewhere and hiding, but it wasn't to be. he almost cried with relief as he played the prelude of light and left the temple. To his ultimate relief, she saved and quit.
He staggered out of the game area, and Ganondorf met up with him.
"link, you okay? You're pale."
Link shivered and gave him an exasperated look.
"have I ever told you how much I hate that psychopath?"
Ganondorf couldn't help but chuckle.
"on multiple occasions."
Link unsheathed his sword.
"what's so funny?" he demanded, and beat on Ganondorf with the harmless prop.
(A/N: I know this is more 'when the N64 is on', but I just thought you'd enjoy my bizarre gameplaying tendencies. I have tested various methods of escaping the stone bird's pit, I always did it right the first time until the one day I decided to find out, purely by curious choice, and I have followed the water around hyrule from its source to its end. I must have no life.)