Title: Kitsune Delight
Author: Mistress Nika (nikasama1480-at-yahoo.com)
Rating: PG-13
Couples: Kurama/Kagome, Kouga/InuYasha, Miroku/Sango, Hiei/OC (eventually)
Warnings: shounen-ai, crossover, minor violence, language, groping from a certain houshi (what IY fic is complete without it?)
Disclaimer: don't own, don't sue (Who?? Moo?? O.o) Oh, Uchiha Kair owns the OC Kairi. She gave me permission to use her. ;D
Chapter Eleven:
"Frightful Tableau"
Kagome studied Youko's serious expression. "Why wouldn't he like me?" she wondered aloud.
He smiled at her and said with a wink, "Hiei doesn't really like anyone. Especially people he's never met before. He's not very trusting of new people." He glanced back in the direction Hiei had disappeared and said, "However, he did seem angrier than usual."
Kagome smiled. She could tell he was itching to track the little demon down, but he was also hesitant to leave her side. "It's alright." she said sweetly and placed a hand on his arm. "Go after him. We'll be fine here."
--------------
Mama Higurashi paced up and down the hallway of her daughter's school. Her lips pursed angrily and her eyebrows scrunched together giving her the look all disobedient children fear. An angry parent. One hand rested on her hip as she paced and the other clenched the cell phone she held to her ear.
"WHAT!?" she all but screamed into the phone. After a pause she seemed to grow even angrier and yelled again. "YOU CAN'T DO THAT!!" ...pause... "I DON'T CARE!! You can't just pop in whenever you feel like it! We have LIVES you know!!" ...pause... "I don't CARE if she'll be happy to see you! WE --" Her expression seemed to soften a bit here and she stopped pacing. "Of course I missed you AND I'll be happy to see you. I just wish you'd give me warning, that's all." ...pause... "Alright. I'll see you then. What? No, Kagome's not home. No, she's not in the past. She's out shopping with... OH! Wait until you meet him! He's so polite, and cultured and GORGEOUS!! Huh? NO, I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT THE CAT!!! I'm talking about...actually, I'll tell you when I see you. Yes... I'm heading home now. See you there."
She flicked the phone closed with a smile. 'Maybe his coming is a blessing in disguise,' she thought with an almost insane grin. 'I could use some help in my wicked plans to meddle in my daughter's love life.'
Then she let out a classic super-villan laugh causing the entire school to wet their pants in terror. (and people wonder where kagome gets it from -.-)
--------------
Halfway around the world, two familiar figures stumbled through an overgrown and deserted graveyard. The night was silent and the full moon was temporarily shielded from view by thick black clouds causing one of the figures to trip. He was obviously male from the angry curses that followed. The clouds drifted away, casting some light on the two. One was the butt of almost all Hiei's jokes and the other was a certain Reikai Tantei with an attitude problem, the latter of whom was currently sitting on the ground. Or more accurately, he had sat up after falling to the ground.
"You're sure this is the right place, Urameshi?" a nervous Kuwabara asked.
Yusuke angrily stood up and continued walking. "Yes, Kuwabara! For the millionth time YES!! This is the right place!"
Kuwabara's eyes darted back and forth anxiously. "I just got this creepy feeling something's watching us."
Stepping over a fallen headstone and nearly tripping on a vine that managed to wrap around his foot Yusuke shot back, "Of course something's watching us! That's why we're here! Koenma said some kind of Shadow Beast is stalking people here. It watches them for a while and if they act scared it attacks them! So, don't ... ACT ... SCARED!!"
Kuwabara shuddered as a chill ran down his spine. "It ain't a act." he muttered, eyes continuing to dart back and forth rapidly.
Yusuke rounded on his teammate. "Look!" he demanded, "We just gotta figure out what it is and if possible capture or kill it. Then I can get to my date with Keiko...like that'll happen in the next ten centuries...and you can get back to your kitten."
"Hey!" Kuwabara shouted back, "Don't bring Eikichi into this!! She's innocent!"
"Innocent my ass!!" Yusuke responded angrily. "She tried to scratch my eyes out!!"
"That's because you SAT ON HER!!!"
Throwing up his hands in exasperation, Yusuke turned back to the search for the elusive monster and Kuwabara's anger suddenly disappeared as another cold shiver crept up on him.
"And tell me again why we're here alone?" he asked nervously. "Not that the shrimp'd be any use, but Kurama'd be good back-up y'know."
Yusuke sighed. "Kurama is with Higurashi, the miko from the other case. And who knows where Hiei is! You're just lucky the miko's mother is trying to hook Kurama up with her daughter, otherwise you'd be here alone! Damn it!" he cursed as he tripped yet again and banged his knee on a slab of stone. "You'd think a mission could take us to...I don't know...JAMAICA!!! But nooo...we get sent to a graveyard in Canada!" Yusuke continued his rant on the location, his missing another date with Keiko, creepy toddlers having it in for him and everything else he could think of as Kuwabara followed hesitantly along behind him. All Kuwabara heard of his rant was something about wanting a beach, too many damn trees and a squirrel from Hell eating his left shoe.
Kuwabara shuddered again as yet another chill ran up his spine. And that's when he saw what exactly was causing the chills. Two glowing golden eyes in the bushes to their right! 'Just a cat' he thought to himself. 'Just a cat. Just a cute little furry kitty. Just a harmless little ball of fluff. Nothing scary. Nothing dangerous. Not a demon. Not a monster. Just a cute cuddly kitten.'
Suddenly a shrill laugh cut through the still night air.
"YAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!"
"What the hell was THAT!?" Yusuke exclaimed as he spun around trying to locate the source of the laugh.
Kuwabara felt like his heart was going to explode from his chest! The laugh had come from the eyes!
"Urameshi! Urameshi!" he cried frantically. "Not a cat! NOT A CAT!!"
"What!?" Yusuke replied still searching for the laugh's origin. "What are you talking about?"
Kuwabara extended a shaking finger and pointed at the glowing eyes. "Eyes! Eyes!! Urameshi, EYES!!! Not a cat! Not a CAT!!" he cried out in fearful panic.
Yusuke stared into the bushes where Kuwabara was pointing. Sure enough, a second laugh echoed out from the eyes.
A young female voice spoke sinisterly in response to their attention. "You have entered the grave of forgotten soooouuuuls!" she dramaticised. "Now you can never leave!!"
The eyes bobbed once. Apparently moving into an attacking position.
The voice continued on in it's creepy tone, "Now you who fears me will remain here as one of the damned for eternity!!"
Yusuke got into a fighting stance. "Whatever you are!" he called, "We were sent here to stop you! So why don't you come on out!?"
Kuwabara followed suit and let out a manly war-cry.
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
He screamed like a girl and tore off in the other direction.
"Chase! Chase! Chase!" the mysterious voice sung happily.
A tan blur shot out of the bushes and quickly knocked Kuwabara to the ground, pinning him with it's relatively small body.
"Now you are miiiiine!!" she cheered joyfully.
"Rei Gan!"
Yusuke attempted to blast the thing off Kuwabara, but she leapt up at the last minute and dodged it with feline grace. Coming to rest on a tree branch she pouted in a less frightening and much more childish voice, "Hey! That wasn't very nice!"
"Oh yeah?" Yusuke returned. "Then this ain't gonna be nice either!"
Leaping into the air he landed a solid punch in the creature's face, knocking her to the ground below. In the scant moonlight he managed to make out a long lion-like tail and a pair of tufted ears on her head. Obviously it was a demon. But what he heard next shocked him.
"That...sniff...that...sniffle...THAT WASN'T NICE!!" she wailed at the top of her lungs, tears streaming down her tanned face.
Yusuke almost fainted. Wasn't this thing supposed to be a vicious monster, preying on passerby in the night? So why was she crying!?
Sucking up her tears she gathered herself proudly to her full height, all of two feet, and shouted, "You're gonna get it now!!" Holding one hand out in front of her she cried, "Unholy Ray of CREAM!!" A white beam shot out of her palm and instantaneously coated Yusuke in a thick milk-like substance.
He then sweatdropped.
"Hey, Kuwabara?" he said to the oaf who was slowly extraditing himself from the ground.
"Yeah?" he returned, eyeing the chibi cat-girl suspiciously.
Yusuke responded in an exaggeratedly calm voice. "It's a cat."
Then all three of them sweatdropped.
--------------
Youko had left Kagome and the kits alone at the sweets shop, though he had protested repeatedly before she had all but ordered him to leave. He was certain she could take care of herself and the kits with no problem, but a good mate didn't leave their family alone in potentially dangerous territory. Despite the protestations of his human side, he, Youko, fully intended to make her his mate. If she agreed of course. He wasn't some low class oni who wouldn't give the female a choice. Kagome was his equal in all ways.
Following the youki of a certain fire demon, he made his way across the rooftops in the direction he was certain would lead him to Hiei. As he felt it grow nearer, he dropped to the ground in the alley behind a rather dubious looking shop. His ears swiveled around as he caught a familiar, "Hn" from his right.
Turning around he came face to... okay, maybe not face to face. More like face to waist...but anyway! Hiei calmly stepped out from the shadows, glaring at the Youko before him.
"Hello, Hiei." Youko greeted with an arrogant smirk.
"Hn." Hiei replied. "Who let you out?"
Youko chuckled. Always count on Hiei for sarcastic remarks and random insults! Walking closer to his friend, he replied, "I did. Or rather, Shuuichi did." He waved a hand dismissively as he commented, "It was nessacery."
Hiei leaned casually against the brick wall and kept his eyes trained on Youko. "I saw." he said, a hint of displeasure tingeing his voice. "Who's the female? She can't be your mate. You haven't been out long enough in eighteen years to have a kit that young."
Youko continued smiling and took a place against the wall beside him. "You're right." he said with a mischievous glint in his eye. "I haven't. But I plan to rectify that."
A few moments passed in silence before Hiei spoke up again. "So, who is she?" he asked again.
Youko tilted his head to grin at the fire demon at his side. "Jealous, Hiei?" he teased.
"Hn." was his only answer as Hiei avoided his gaze by staring at the opposite wall.
Youko could see the tight clench of Hiei's jaw and the way his fists, surreptitiously hidden in the folds of his cloak, began to form balls. Hiei was jealous, despite whatever protestations he would make. Kurama had been the one to befriend him, show him unconditional acceptance and love no matter what past crimes he may have, and had, committed. They had a bond that went beyond brothers, beyond lovers. Whether he would admit it or not, Hiei was jealous of anyone who he thought could possibly break that bond between the two males. He was afraid to lose perhaps the only person he could call 'friend'.
Deciding not to torment him anymore, Youko said, "She's the miko Yusuke and I were ordered to befriend."
Hiei raised an eyebrow at the Youko, but said nothing, allowing him to continue.
"Her name is Higurashi Kagome."
Youko then gave him a condensed version of her story, including the fact that neither of the kits were hers biologically. Youko knew her secrets would be safe with Hiei, so he had no reservations about telling him.
--------------
Kagome watched Shippou happily stuffing his face full of delicious chocolate pastries. She and the two kits sat at an outside table, watching the people go by. Or rather, watching the people go by who were watching them sitting quietly at a table. They were an oddity and she was certainly prepared to receive her share of shy glances and outright stares. However, they were now beginning to grate on her nerves. Never has she so wished to be in her human form, to fade into the background.
As a male reptile youkai stopped to stare, she felt her last bit of patience slip. She bared her fangs slightly at the man; an unspoken threat if he didn't get on his way she would probably rip him in two. The man nearly shrieked in terror and tripped over his own feet as he struggled to get away with all due haste.
Sighing, Kagome rubbed the bridge of her nose. She was getting a headache. First, she had to deal with InuYasha at what she considered an ungodly hour for a Saturday. Then there was the confrontation with Kikyou in the village, after which she suddenly found herself the mother to an infant kitsune who was probably a target for every youkai in the Sengoku Jidai. Then there was a run-in with her ningen friends AND two Reikai Tantei! And now, here she was. Sitting at a cafe, getting stared at by half the city while Shippou scarfed down more sugar than any child should have in a month! AND her escort was none other than the infamous Youko Kurama ... who had run off to chase down a 'friend'.
Kagome absently wondered if perhaps they were more than 'friends', but decided it was not any of her business. Still, she almost giggled as she imagined a child who looked a cross between her escort and the youkai she had seen on the roof, Hiei she believed his name was.
As several very humorous combinations flitted through her mind, she was unaware of the eyes watching her. Or rather, she paid them no mind, assuming they were that of another 'adoring fan'.
--------------
On a rooftop overlooking the cafe, a youkai crouched low, watching Kagome and the kits with interest. Her green eyes flashed with a predatory gleam as she eyed them. Pulling the hood of her simple brown cloak back slightly, she brushed her long raven bangs out of her eyes. Looking at her intended target, she felt a slight pang of remorse.
(flashback)
The girl kneels before a male figure hidden in shadows. He says in a low, seductive voice, "There is one more task I wish you to accomplish before you receive payment. A relatively simple task for one as proficient as you. I wish you to aquire for me a child. Such a simple task you should complete in short order."
The man moves slightly forward, a hint of white hair gleaming before he fades back into the shadow. "The child I require, is a very special child." he says. "The child, is Jikan."
(end flashback)
And here she was, about to snatch a helpless baby from the arms of it's obviously loving mother. If her payment for completing this task weren't so important to her, she would have refused. But as it were, this was the only way. The only way she could find them again.
Standing, she said to herself, "Alright, Kairi. Just do it and run." And with that she seemed to disappear.
--------------
Kagome'd had enough. She managed to pull a protesting Shippou away from his sweets and was now stalking down the street in search of a quiet place out of the way where she could await Youko's return, without the stares and hushed whispers.
Turning down a side alley, she was suddenly jostled hard as a figure in a brown cloak bumped into her. The telltale scent of a female gave away the sex of the offender, but not the species. As the woman, who was considerably shorter in stature than she, bowed deeply and asked for forgiveness, Kagome inhaled her scent deeply. And in doing so was instantly suspicious. The woman's scent did not carry that of any animal type youkai. Which meant she was most likely elemental based and therefore higher in status and power than most other youkai simply by grace of genetics.
She wore a ragged looking brown cloak with it's hood up and covering most of her face. However, beneath it Kagome could see glimpses of red and black. The cloak ended just below the knees, revealing black pant-clad legs. On her feet were a pair of immaculate black slippers.
'Ah.' Kagome thought to herself, coming to the realization that the girl was not what she wanted to seem. 'She's in disguise. That means she most likely works for a youkai lord.' She took note of the way the girl lightly balanced herself, putting equal weight on both feet even as she bowed repeatedly. Her back was also tense, her muscles ready to aid her in fight or flight at a moments notice.
'I see.' Kagome thought with smug amusement. 'She's probably either a spy or an assassin. And is afraid she has been caught.'
"Sumimasen! Sumimasen!" the girl said hastily, bowing. "I did not mean to run into you! Please forgive me!"
Kagome smiled warmly at her. She had no reason to interrupt the girl's task, whatever it may be. And so replied, "No need to apologize. No harm done. Just watch where you're going." Then she continued on her way, leaving the girl to stare at her back. She then made for the back of the alley where she knew rested a small, rather private, inn where she could have some semblance of privacy.
--------------
Kairi watched the woman go with a satisfied smirk. The plans had been laid out in her mind and the first step taken. Now all she had to do was watch and wait for her opportunity to strike. She turned and left the alleyway, heading for the nearest rooftop to keep an eye on her target.
There normally would be no way to steal a Jikan child from a parent who is also Jikan. Even if the parent weren't extremely powerful, which she was more than certain the woman was, there was always the problem of their built in defenses. Her Boss had told her to beware of a Jikan's innate abilities; abilities even they may not be aware they possess. Specifically, their power over the flow of time.
She hadn't known the Jikan's ability to control time was anything but a myth until Boss had told her. He had given her details on things no person, human or youkai, should know. Things she was very interested to find out how exactly he came upon such information. He said that when a Jikan feels their life or the lives of those dear to them are in danger, they may release their power in one explosive wave that could presumably cause massive widespread destruction and irreparable damage to the time barrier.
This was why she was proceeding as she was. Cautiously. Silently. And this was the reason Boss had hired her. He required someone with both the power AND the skill to carry it out the mission successfully. Her unique background was just the thing required. Her half-breed blood gave her the abilities. Her time with the Loia bandits had given her the skills to utilize her abilities to their fullest potential.
And after she had completed this mission and safely stowed away her payment for later use, she would turn those skills on her Boss. She would extract every bit of information he possessed, in the slim chance it might lead her closer to her destination. Closer to finding home.
Pulling out a smooth black stone about the size of her hand, Kairi stared at it intently. Her plans for Boss would have to wait. Until after she had received her payment. Right now, it was time to watch, learn and strike when the moment was right. An image of Kagome and the two kits was reflected on the stone, all sitting serenely and unsuspectingly at a table in an inn.
--------------
After speaking with Hiei, Youko left the Jaganshi to his own devices. Hiei was now quite well informed on the current situation and had actually taken the news that Youko intended to mate 'the female' quite well. After the usual insults and "I don't trust her" he had told Kurama that he had searched Kagome's emotions without permission from his place on the roof using his Jagan. He then admitted there was nothing even remotely hostile towards Youko and that she was, in fact, infatuated with him already.
The kitsune stored that little bit of information away for use later with a grin. Then he headed back to where he had last seen 'his woman' (look! he's thinking like Kouga! KAWAII!! -glomps him-) but found her gone. And with the stares he was getting, which he himself was not unaccustomed to, he didn't have to wonder why.
Following her scent easily through the city, he came upon them safely ensconced in a remote inn. They were happily chatting with the owner, an aging neko youkai, about the weather of all things! So engrossed was the man in the conversation, quickly quoting the relative humidity levels for the past three weeks with a gleeful expression, that he did not even notice Youko enter.
Kagome did, however. As did both of the kits.
Kagome flashed him a genuinely happy smile, then motioned with her head in the direction of the rambling man, her eyes pleading with him to save her from a fate worse than death. Satoru squirmed in her lap and made cooing noises, recognizing even at his young age the scent of one he knew.
Shippou, who had been sitting on the table and chewing on a piece of celery, grinned widely and leaped off the table, running to greet him. Apparently the kit had overcome his initial fear of the older male. Running around Youko's legs in a blur, he chatted away. "YAY!!! You're back! Didyoufindyourfriend?Didyouhaveanicetalk?Didyouhavefuntalkingwithhim? Ihadfun!! IreallylikeAmado!! IgotcandyandpastriesandcoffeeandlemondropsandchocolateminticecreamandpeanutbutterfudgeandachocolatealmondbarandthreeboxesofmaltedmilkballsandLOTSofpocky!!! Butthenkaasanbroughtushereandshewouldn'tletmedancenakedontheroofforsomereason. ThenshesaidIneededmorevegetablesandlesssugarsoshemademeeatceleryandit'sreallynastybutforsomereasonIjustcouldn'tstopeatingit!! Howweirdisthat!?" (note one)
"Whoa! Whoa!" Youko laughed and bent down to pick the hyper kit up by the tail. He dangled a wildly grinning Shippou in the air, the kit not minding at all. "I can understand the other stuff, but should you really have had coffee? That stuff's like the most potent of sake to a kitsune! Especially one as young as you."
Shippou continued grinning and made his arms and legs wave randomly back and forth from his hanging position giving him the look of a rag doll blowing in the wind. "KaasanwasbusyglaringatsomeguywhowasstaringatherandIdidn'twantherdrinktogotowastesinceshewasn'tdrinkingit! Sowhileshewasn'tlookingIgrabbeditanddrankitall!!" He finished his rapid string of words with an involuntary body twitch and continued grinning drunkenly.
Youko raised an eyebrow at him. "Uh-huh." he said, watching the little fox warily. "Why don't we......go......talk to your mother..?" he asked, just hoping she could deal with the hyper, drunken kit.
--------------
Miroku and InuYasha walked calmly back to the village, side-by-side, but far apart. Neither seemed very comfortable and the second they reached the village, Miroku dashed off to go fondle unsuspecting village girls. InuYasha considered going to Sango and demanding that box, but one look at her made him quickly decide against it. She was sitting outside Kaede's hut, calmly sharpening her sword with the camera in her lap and a look of promised death in her eye should she be disturbed.
Instead the hanyou sat down with his back to a tree to contemplate what he could bribe her with in order to get his hands on the box. If only for long enough to crush it into a thousand little pieces.
'A new sword?' he wondered to himself. 'No, she doesn't need one and she's pretty attached to the one she's got now. Besides, where would I get one? Sooo... how about some of Kagome's soaps? She once said she liked those. No, she probably has some Kagome give her. Not to mention she'd know I stole them. Sooo... maybe I could get that monk out of her hair somehow? Yeah, I'm sure she'd like that. But, it IS kinda just as easy for her to knock him unconscious.' He sweatdropped at that. 'So, what can I do? I gotta get that box back before Kagome can get her hands on it!'
His train of thought was interrupted as the smell of earth and bones flooded his nostrils, making him scrunch up his nose in disgust.
"INUYASHA!!!" a shrill voice cried, causing the entire village to fall to the ground in instantaneous death, their brains having exploded. Okay, maybe not. But a few did cover their ears.
InuYasha whipped his head around to face the corpse with a false grin. "Kikyou." he greeted. Of course, what he meant to say was, "GO THE FUCK AWAY, YOU CLAY BITCH!!! YOU CREEP ME OUT!!!" But he kept silent.
Not hearing what he meant to say, Kikyou stormed up to him with a glare. "InuYasha!" she demanded, "I wanna know exactly how you feel about me!"
InuYasha, being a whipped puppy and having the conditioned response drilled repeatedly into his head by constant henpecking, replied, "I love you of course!"
Kikyou put both hands on her hips as a flaming background appeared behind her. InuYasha cowered behind a tree.
"Then why did I find you in the beginning throws of passion with the wolf, huh!?" she cried angrily. "Answer me!"
Several nearby villagers paused to stare at that comment. One whispered to another, "See? I told you."
InuYasha allowed his anger to overcome his common sense and temporarily forgot it was Kikyou he was talking to. "It wasn't like that!!" he yelled back, causing the villagers to dive for cover while still being able to watch what was going on. "And does the whole world have to know!? We were trying to kill each other! Not MATE!!"
Kikyou was poised for destruction after hearing the hanyou yell at her like that, but at that exact moment a whirlwind stormed into the village and flattened her.
Kouga stood in the place previously occupied by the undead miko and pointed a finger angrily in InuYasha's face. "Get this straight, inu-koro!" he yelled at the stunned hanyou. "I don't care what YOU want! I will not be your mate!!"
InuYasha's previous anger evaporated at the unexpected arrival of Kouga. All he could do was stare in shock into the flashing blue eyes of the wolf prince. After a few moments of InuYasha's stunned silence, Kouga's anger also seemed to disappear and he lowered his finger. For several moments the two just stared at each other.
Finally, InuYasha spoke. "Kouga..." he began, "...you know you're standing on Kikyou?"
"What's a Kikyou?" Kouga asked innocently, cocking his head to the side rather cutely in confusion.
"A miko." InuYasha replied simply. "A dead one. But she's still walking around. That is, until you ran her over."
"Oh." was Kouga's response. Looking down he saw Kikyou laying on her stomach with her arms outstretched as if trying to escape. However all she could do was twitch as the wolf finally removed his foot from her back, leaving her eyes swirly.
Kouga regarded Kikyou with a curious expression as she continued to twitch, completely unconscious. He grinned sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck. "Heh-heh, oops?"
"Why didn't I think of that?" InuYasha said softly as he watched her twitch as well.
Sango chuckled to herself as she watched the two rival males. Apparently neither had realized that they were standing peacefully shoulder-to-shoulder, watching the miko twitch with the exact same expression; a mixture of innocent curiosity and amusement. However, she knew that with those two the peace, such as it was, would not last long.
Putting away her things, she began to rise to her feet intending on stepping between them the minute the inevitable fight began.
Unfortunately, with her focus on the two youkai, her 'perverted monk detector' took a back seat to the desire to see the village remain in one piece. As such, she didn't sense the purple robed figure creeping up behind her intent on only one thing; her backside.
Miroku reached forward just as she was standing, causing her head to crash painfully into his. Spinning around, she came face to face with a swirly eyed Miroku weaving back and forth dizzily.
Both Kouga and InuYasha found this new display much more interesting than the semi-dead miko and began to walk towards them. Just as they reached two, Sango cried, "HENTAI!!!" and punched...not slapped but punched Miroku in the face! Apparently her patience had run out. As her fist dealt out another healthy dose of punishment, he suddenly lurched forward, falling onto her and knocking her to the ground.
Or he would have, had InuYasha not been right behind her. Instead of crashing to the ground, she found herself knocked into a startled hanyou. Not expecting her to fall suddenly, he was pushed off balance and stumbled several steps to the right. Several steps that brought him into direct contact with Kouga. VERY direct contact! He was now leaning heavily into the wolf demon's chest, his arms thrown out to the side as if to hug him. And that wasn't all. Oh no. He also had his lips pressed firmly against the other males! He was KISSING him, with wide eyes filled with shock!!
Sango hit first InuYasha and then the ground, her kimono flying up around her waist, giving the entire village a good look at exactly what was under that kimono. Also, unfortunately for her, Miroku also collapsed on top of her unconscious!
Four simultaneous screams echoed throughout the village.
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKK!!!!" a feminine shriek from Sango as she shoved Miroku off her, pulled her clothes down and began pounding him in the head with a nearby rock.
"YAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!" an only slightly more masculine shriek as Miroku miraculously regained consciousness, shielded his abused head with his arms and began fleeing for his life from the insane demon slayer.
"HOLY HELL!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!" from InuYasha as he quickly leaped away from Kouga and began fleeing in the opposite direction.
"YAAACK!!" exclaimed Kouga as he wiped his mouth on the back of his hand. He then followed that up with a cry of, "GET BACK HERE, INU-KORO!!! YOU GOTTA PAAAAAYYY!!!" as he chased after him.
Kikyou, presumably from all the racket, chose this moment to rejoin the land of the living...in a way. Regaining consciousness, she took one look around and began chasing Kouga who was chasing InuYasha as she screamed, "You horrible wolf! How dare you steal my man and accost me!?!? I'm a MIKO!! I'M GONNA PURIFY YOU OUT OF EXISTANCE!!!"
The villagers watched the happenings in shock. The last of the demon slayers chased a perverted monk through the center of the village and back again, brandishing a large boulder above her head. A hanyou with a disgusted look on his face was chased by an enraged wolf demon who was chased by a psychotic undead miko. The miko wielded a bow, but no arrows, instead holding it like a bat and threatening to purify both of the youkai's equipment off.
And if that weren't enough, their current village miko decided to put in an appearance at just that moment. Kaede strolled happily and blissfully unawares toward her hut, a basket of herbs, oils and roots in her hands. Kirara trotted happily alongside her, until she saw her mistress taking part in the mayhem that was plaguing the once peaceful village.
Taking in the strange sight, she stopped dead in her tracks, causing Kaede to trip over her. The old miko threw up her hands in surprise as she pitched forward, hurling the basket of magical medicinal concoctions into the sky. A nearby man reached out and quickly caught her, saving the old woman from a probably very painful encounter with the ground.
"Oh!" Kaede cried in horror as she watched her basket arc it's way through the sky. "The herbs! Don't let them touch you!" she warned.
Time seemed to slow down then as the basket sailed through the air. The villagers dashed away, taking cover from the randomly falling plants in anything from huts to baskets. However, a certain group of angry people were too preoccupied with killing each other to hear her warning.
Miroku darted under the basket, just missing being hit with it, still chased by a boulder wielding Sango. "Come back and take your punishment like the man you're NOT!!" she screamed as the basket bounced off the giant stone, back up into the air and farther to the side unnoticed by the duo.
InuYasha then ran by them with a cry of, "For Kami's sake, LEAVE ME ALONE!!! I didn't WANT to kiss you!!"
Kouga chased after him calling, "You know that's not true!! Otherwise you wouldn't have tried to MARK ME!!!" Finally realizing he could catch him with ease, he piled on the jewel enhanced speed and plowed into InuYasha's middle, knocking him a good twenty feet. Safely out of the path of the twisting tumbling basket.
Seeing Kouga tackle InuYasha, Kikyou let out an angry, "NOOOOOO!!!!" and sped forward...directly under the basket. It landed upside down on her head, causing her to pause in astonishment as she suddenly found herself with a reed hat. One that reeked suspiciously of magic and medicine.
All activity suddenly stopped as everyone froze to take in the strange site.
Kouga and InuYasha both lay on the ground, arms and legs entwined from Kouga's attack leap. Neither moved and even seemed to forget each other completely as they stared in silence. Miroku, who had been the first of the group to see the messy miko, tripped and fell on his belly, somehow managing to keep his face up to watch in astonishment. Sango stopped chasing Miroku and dropped the boulder, calmly walking to his side to help him up, not taking her eyes off the woman either.
Kikyou sweatdropped. She was the center of attention once again. Thick goop mixed with green herbs slid down her body, into her clothes and over her face, hitting the ground with a wet PLOP! A bright red root had somehow become wedged in the front of her shirt. She was a veritable tossed salad, complete with vinegret dressing. She glared evilly at no one in particular.
It was only when smoke began rising from the back of her shirt that people began to move again.
"Great Kami!" a woman screamed, "She's on fire!!"
"Bring water!!" another woman yelled in terror.
A man quickly brought forth a bucket filled to the brim with cool water. Just as he hurled it on her, Kaede yelled, "NO!!" But it was too late. The water reacted with the mixture of herbs and oils and Kikyou shrieked in pain and terror as her skin began dropping off in large vicuous chunks.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" the entire village screamed in absolute terror, causing even the most vicious of youkai to flee the surrounding forests in fear!
Sango shrieked and leapt into Miroku's arms, clutching to him and hiding her head in his robes as she sobbed uncontrollably. Miroku clutched her to him protectively and took several steps back, not even thinking of groping her. Kouga and InuYasha quickly latched onto the nearest person, one another, screamed at the top of their lungs and scooted back on their butts at an even fifty miles an hour, legs flailing wildly as they scrambled to get away. They finally found themselves with their backs to a wall, literally, as the dying miko advanced on them.
Her steps were slow and heavy as pieces of meat continued to fall away, now revealing bone and sinuous muscle that rippled sickeningly with every move she made. The basket fell from her head, along with a good chunk of her hair, and she continued to move toward the two youkai, her arms outstretched.
"Ewwww!!! Gross!!" a little child exclaimed, "Kikyou's ROTTING!!"
To which the entire village chorused, "Ewwwwww!!"
"InuYasha." she said in a creepily deep voice, her teeth clacking together due to her dwindling lips.
"IT KNOWS MY NAME!!!" InuYasha cried in terror as he clutched tighter to Kouga, who pulled him against his chest instinctively.
"InuYasha." she repeated. "Come to Hell with me! We will be happy together for eternity, rotting in the bowels of the netherworld!"
"Uhhhh...." InuYasha stammered, looking desperately for a way out. Leaping into Kouga's lap, he cried, "No thanks! I think I'll stay here!"
"InuYasha." she said again with an evil angry 'queen-of-the-zombies' look. "You would choose that wolf over ME!?!?"
"Ummm..." InuYasha stumbled again, looking the decaying corpse over with a horrified expression. "Sure! Why not!?"
"I see." she said, not two feet away, her stench easily reaching the sensitive noses of the two youkai huddled together on the ground. "Then I will have to DRAG you to HELL!!"
As she reached towards him with a skeletal hand, InuYasha suddenly cried, "SHE'S GONNA EAT ME!!!" and leapt out of Kouga's lap to cower behind the terrified wolf prince.
Kouga valiantly shielded InuYasha with his body, protecting him against the onslaught of the undead zombie miko... okay, maybe not. But it seemed that way as Kikyou fell to the ground, no longer able to stand.
"I'm melting! Meeelllltiiing!" she wailed as she dissolved into a gelatinous puddle of flesh color ooze. "Oh! What a world!"
As the sun set on the Sengoku Jidai, the undead miko was finally no more. All that remained of her was what suspiciously resembled vomit. For quite a while, no one moved as they tried to come to terms with what they had just seen. As night drifted down upon the silent village, people began to pull themselves together.
After disposing of 'Kikyou', everyone (not everyone! she'd have to have a pretty big hut to hold the entire village!) retired to Kaede's hut for the night. No one thought twice about it when InuYasha asked Kouga to join them. To be honest, not a single one of them would be sleeping that night and NO ONE wanted to be alone!
No one spoke as they all sat around the fire, downing bottle after bottle of sake, hoping in vain to drown the experience away in an alcohol induced stupor. Suffice to say, it wasn't working. They all just stared into the fire with large, glazed eyes. Crickets chirped and a cool breeze blew through the village.
Sango was curled up in Miroku's lap, muttering "worse than Naraku, worse than Naraku, worse than Naraku..." over and over. He stroked her hair and soothingly rubbed her back, trying his best to calm her.
Kaede, who seemed the least affected, was diligently cooking something over the fire. She knew that probably no one was going to eat, but she had to do something to get the terrible visions out of her head of her elder sister's horrifying last minutes!
"I'm gonna have nightmares for the next three centuries," Kouga spoke in a low whisper.
InuYasha sat, extremely close, next to Kouga. Neither had made a move to fight, and it was doubtful they would anytime soon. They were now not only bonded closely by the same terrible experience, but had also taken shelter in each other's arms. Somehow, they both knew that things would never be the same between them again. Neither noticed when one clawed hand sought out the warmth and comfort of another. And neither pulled away.
(note one) In case you couldn't read it, that's "Yay! You're back! Did you find your friend? Did you have a nice talk with him? Did you have fun talking with him? I had fun!! I really like Amado!! I got candy and pastries and coffee and lemon drops and chocolate mint ice cream and peanut butter fudge and a chocolate almond bar and three boxes of malted milk balls and LOTS of pocky!!! But then kaasan brought us here and she wouldn't let me dance naked on the roof for some reason. Then she said I needed more vegetables and less sugar so she made me eat celery and it's really nasty but for some reason I just couldn't stop eating it!! How weird is that!?"
(A/N) Okay, sory for the long wait but apparantly the Plot Bunnies went on strike, kidnapped Inspiration and they all went down to Aruba for a vacation! But I found them...sunbathing!! (shakes head sadly) My poor Plot Bunnies are so burned! And inspiration! O.o He's having to have special treatments!! Well, I'm back, temporarily. In a few days my internet is gonna be cut off, so I don't know when (if ever) another chapter will come. If I have my way it will! However, considering how rarely 'my way' occurs... Well, form your own conclusions! =D
Next chapter, if there is one, I will give more detail on Kairi. Also you'll be seeing Kagome's older brother, Makina. And the shock will wear off of the group in Sengoku and things will begin to get very interesting indeed! (ear splitting grin)
For every review that is submitted, a bishy is saved from fangirl mobbing!
O.O
REVIEW!!! QUICK!!!
"Oh God!! Run, Inu-chan!! RUUUUNNN!!!"
Remember, only you can prevent bishy rapes by fangirls that aren't you! ;D
Thank you to: Lynette, Kazetaka no Yume, Kate, Caladriel, kojika85, Dark Fox, Killiara, moonpriestess5986, criss, Sunbeam1, bluefuzzyelf, lilhillbillie, SilverKnight7, SilverNinjaHikaru, Sweet Kawaii Kitsune, hamahama, buff200020002002, deadly thorn, Sango132004, RûthäwenAnger's Maiden, Mayukagurl, Morlana, Crimson Colored Cloaked Figure, inu-fanforever, kitsunekagome23, Choas Babe, angelkitty77, Lil Shaman Girl
Lil Shaman Girl: USO!?!? O.O You've never read a Inu/Kouga!?!? You poor deprived thing!! They are soooo wonderful!!
Choas Babe: heh-heh, okay. Just wondering. (rubs neck sheepishly) Oh, that is SO true! DOES Hiei like anyone!? LOL
kitsunekagome23: -.- Now what fun would it be if I told you the plot, aka if Hiei is gay, ahead of time? Why does everyone assume I'm making all the male characters gay!? Kouga and Inu-chan aren't even 'gay'! Or did their love for Kag slip your mind? O.o Okay, let me make this simple. The only 'not-completely-straight' characters in this fic with be Inu, Kouga and an OC I'm bringing in next chapter.
inu-fanforever: SUGOI!! (jumps up and down and claps hands happily) I'm so honored that my fic is your first crossover!! (glomps you happily) I love corrupting people! (malicious grin)
Crimson Colored Cloaked Figure: O.O .................. wow ................ ummm......what can I say? I'm honored you took such pains to beg me to update! O.O
Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay Okay
Morlana: Well, I'm glad you think it's funny. But, y'know, the anime/manga is title "InuYasha" therefore it kinda makes sensee that he would be in it. And, for good grief, he's not 'gay'!! He loved Kikyou! He loved/loves Kagome! He is just now realizing some very deep rooted demon instincts that are awakening strange new feelings for his arch rival. (I personally think it's all sexual tension. ;D) After all, he's only about the equivolent of seventeen. He's confused! He doesn't have a clue what's happening to him! LOL
Mayukagurl: There probably will be a lemon, however it will not be for some time and will definately not be posted here. I do not want my fic removed for sexual content. Ummm...Inu wasn't hitting on Miroku. He was just trying to the the camera back. Y'know, Inu's kinda dense and didn't think twice about how odd it would look for him to do something like that. And poor Miroku was at the mercy of Inu-chan's innocently prying fingers. (I know how it is to be ticklish -.-) I'm glad you like this fic! Here! (hands you a plushie of a drunk, half naked Miroku covered in Mardi Gras beads) I'm randomly handing out Love Beads Plushies!! =D Enjoy!
Luna: LOL (is toweling hair dry) Nah! I was thinking of making Kurama and Hiei past lovers, now broken up but still on good terms. But I didn't want to seem like I'm a RABID yaoi fangirl....even though I am. (shifty eyes) I don't wanna be accused of making ALL the male characters gay...even though I can...happily! =D Oh, did you read Raven Desire's fic? Did you like it? I like it! (bounces with a cup of hot coffee) Heehee! I don't even LIKE coffee! (glomp) Here! Have a Love Beads Plushie!! (hands you a plushie of a drunk, half naked Miroku covered in Mardi Gras beads)
Sango132004: O.O How'd you guess!? (looks around for men in white coats) You didn't tell anyone did you!? Oh, what do I think I'm doing? O.o ............................... ............................................. ................................. .................................................. SHOUNEN-AI!!!!!! =D
Sweet Kawaii Kitsune: WAI!!! I LOVE YOUR NAME!!! (attack glomps you) Just for having such a KAWAII name; HERE!! (hands you a plushie of a drunk, half naked Miroku covered in Mardi Gras beads) Have a Love Beads Plushie!! There will eventually be romance between Kag and Kurama, but remember they haven't even known each other for a full day yet! LOL (wow, Youko moves fast! O.o) I'm working on getting them back to her house though. THEN you can look forward to some romance!! And, yep! Hiei is paired with Uchiha Kair's OC she's graciously allowed me to use! So, eventually, there will be Hiei/Kairi. =D
SilverNinjaHikaru: Well, he means he doesn't think he likes her. But then...who DOES Hiei like!? O.o Oh, yes. InuYasha is going through some very awkard times! LMAO
lilhillbillie: Doubles? You mean of the piccies from the camera? =D Yeah, I'm gonna circulate those EVERYWHERE!!! Look for them at your local grocery store in August. ;D (attack glomps her) Daisuki desu, Billie-chan!! (hands her two dozen plushies of a drunk, half naked Miroku covered in Mardi Gras beads) For being such a WONDERFUL PERSON and Miroku's Official Stalker, you get LOTS!!! =D
bluefuzzyelf: O.o I working on it, okay!? LOL I gotta re-write it though. It's agoin nowheres fast! ;D (hands her a plushie of a drunk, half naked Miroku covered in Mardi Gras beads) Love Beads Plushie for Hakura-chan!! (slips her another of InuYasha in the exact same state) Shh!!! Don't let the others see it!! I only have one! ;D
Sunbeam1/Kazetaka no Yume: Um...remind me again of what it was you were supposed to remind me of..? O.o (beats head against desk)
Killiara: NEKO-CHAN!!!! I have missed you greatly!! (attack glomps her and both go flying ten feet) (is knocked out) X.X
Dark Fox: Oh, maybe I should have mentioned that I'm queen of evil cliffhangers? O.o I like them...and they like me. We have a good relationship together. But our relationship is detrimental to our readers health. =D Gomen ne! Glad you love it!! Sorry you had to wait so long for the update to learn the fate of the evil cliffhanger of doom!!
kojika85: Yep! But I don't think he's gonna be very confused for much longer! ;D LOL (hands you a plushie of a drunk, half naked Miroku covered in Mardi Gras beads) A Love Beads Plushie just for you for being such a faithful reviewer!!
Caladriel: Well, all I can say is; don't like? don't read. Simple as that. But the main couple is het...soooo... it's your perogative. Glad you like the fic though!
Lynette: Well, I must say the worst flames are those who say "Love the fic! 'cept for the gay stuff!" Honestly, you really can't look past surface appeances to see what's underneath, can you? I bet you're a very shallow person with a very high opinon of yourself. You're always right, aren't you? You're never wrong. Y'know what? I think I saw you! Oh yes! You were sneaking away from the abortion clinic as it was engulfed in flames. (-.-) Closed minds are more dangerous than open ones on any day, my friend. (randomly pokes her with a stick (not in a mean way; I poke everyone :D))