"I feel like I'm going to throw up…"

Ian looked over at River, and thought that his roommate did look pale and sick – even under his almost perpetual tan. It was how he, himself, felt as well. Of course, River knew Dotty and James far better than Ian did – he'd been to their house for the Thanksgiving holiday, while Ian had been to Sam and Jack's. He'd had much more of a chance to get to know them and feel close to them. Ian had only met James once – and although Dotty was a slightly different story, he still hadn't known her all that well.

"This is my fault," Ian said, softly, feeling like he'd been kicked in the gut repeated.

Sam shook her head. Standing in front of Shawn's bed where the two of them had been seated, she'd been able to watch their reactions to the news, and both had seemed to take it hard. Of course, after so many months together, the three of them – Shawn, River and Ian – had probably come to feel a little like brothers, so it was hardly surprising. Especially River, who had been to the Adams' house over Thanksgiving.

"It's no one's fault, Ian," she said, reaching out and brushing her hand along his dark hair. "It was an accident. The de-icer they were using on the wings couldn't keep up and the flaps stuck."

"They wouldn't have been on that plane if it wasn't for me," Ian told her. "I was the one who convinced Shawn that a trip to New York would be the coolest present he could give them for their anniversary. Shit, I even got them the tickets to my mom's performance – pretty much forcing them to go even if they didn't want to."

"They wanted to go," River told his friend. "You know it. This isn't your fault." He turned to Sam. "How's Shawn doing?"

She shook her head, still touching Ian's hair and debating whether he'd allow her to hug him or if he'd pull away. He was so hard to read, sometimes, and other times, he was like an open book.

"We're going to take him with us – probably for at least a couple days, maybe longer. Which was why I was looking for his clothes."

River stood up.

"I'll pack them for you, Major." He knew where they were better than she did.

Sam nodded and sat down next to Ian, taking River's spot as the two watched him grab up Shawn's small duffle bag and start going through the dresser drawers that were assigned to him.

"This isn't your fault," she told Ian.

He wouldn't meet her eyes, which told Sam that he didn't believe her, and she saw a tear drop onto Ian's leg. She put her arm around him, and he stiffened, but he didn't pull away. Instead, he leaned into her touch, resting his head on her shoulder, still not looking at her.

"It's not, Ian," she repeated. "No more than it's Shawn's for giving them the plane tickets, or Jack's for telling them to have fun when they left."

"It's not the same, Sam," Ian told her, but he didn't argue with her.

"Here you go, Major," River said, handing her the now somewhat filled bag. "There's enough to last him a few days, anyways."

Sam nodded, and stood up, releasing Ian gently. He didn't look up at her.

"Thank you, River."

"Can I go with you?" The Californian asked. "I'd like to talk to him before he goes…"

"Of course." She looked at Ian. "Ian?"

He shook his head, looking down at Jaffer, who had cuddled up against him from the other side when Sam had put her arm around him.

"You go on. He won't want to see me…"

"Ian."

"I wouldn't want to, if I were him."

"It's-"

River touched her arm, cutting Sam off. When she looked at him, he shook his head, telling her silently that there was absolutely nothing she could say to get him to move. As much as she wanted to prove him wrong, she didn't really have the time to. Instead, she sighed, and leaned over and pressed a kiss against the top of Ian's head, almost right where Jack had tried to scalp him with the shovel only a month or so before.

"If you need us, Ian, you know the number."

He nodded, still looking at Jaffer, or his hand, or at the floor. Anywhere but at her.

"Thanks, Sam." His voice was a mere whisper, but she could hear the hurt in it.

Sam and River headed for the door, and Jaffer left Ian's side to join them. When they were out the door and heading down the hallway, she looked over at River.

"Was it his idea for them to go?"

River nodded.

"Shawn was trying to come up with the perfect vacation to send them on for their anniversary, and Ian talked it up so much, he was pretty much forced to send them there – especially after he said he could get tickets to that show – do you know how much one of them goes for? But it's not his fault."

"No, it's not his fault."

They walked into the Commandant's office without stopping to talk to the other people in the office – which included the Commandant himself. Jack wasn't holding Shawn when they walked in, but the two of them were close to each other, and Shawn's eyes were red and wet.

"Where's Ian?" Jack asked.

"He's not coming," Sam said.

"He's got it into his head that it's his fault," River added.

"He's right."

They all looked at Shawn, who was looking down at his hands. The younger cadet hurt so badly just then that he was glad for an excuse to lash out at someone else. Someone he could turn on and blame this whole thing on. Where a moment before it hadn't been anyone's fault – it'd been a horrible accident – now it was. He'd heard River's statement and had immediately grabbed onto it, taking it as truth.

"Shawn…"

"It was his idea to send them there. He's the reason they were on the plane in the first place. None of this would have happened if he'd have kept his mouth shut. It's…" Shawn trailed off, anger gone as quickly as it had flared up. He didn't have room for more than one emotion at a time in his soul just then, even as empty as it seemed, and the loss was taking the foreground once more. Tears welled up yet again.

Jack pulled him to his feet, and hugged him once more, looking over the boy's shoulder at Sam, who was watching helplessly.

"Let's get you in the truck, Shawn…" he said. "Sam…?"

She stepped forward, taking Jack's place as the one to support Shawn, wrapping her arms around him warmly.

"Come on, Shawn…"

With one arm still around him, she guided him to the door, Jaffer following.

"I should go talk to Ian," Jack said.

River shook his head.

"He won't listen to you, Colonel. Not right now. He's in one of those modes where no one or nothing gets through." The blonde handed Jack Shawn's duffle bag. "You need to take care of Shawn. I'll talk to Ian later, when he's over the shock. You try to do the same to Shawn…"

Jack hesitated, but nodded. He took the bag.

"I'll do that."

"Tell him we love him, okay? Just… don't use those words."

"I will, River."

Jack left the room, too, and River sighed.