Emily smiled up at him and nodded. She bent her head and stroked her fingers along the torn and stitched up skin and he knew already it was from a beer bottle Hunter had broken on the dresser.
"Roman he threatened that since he didn't need his boy anymore that he should just make it that I should never be able to have another baby again." She felt her knees buckle and was about to sink to the floor when Roman had bent fast and curled his hands under her legs and carried her out into the room and back onto the bed.
He dropped her gently to the soft mattress and in seconds had pulled the hoodie over his head leaving him in just a tank top and his jeans and was tugging it over hers. Emily lifted her arms, and he pulled it right down past her waist before sitting down and cradling her in his lap against the headboard.
She curled her small body in against him as he rocked her in his arms, and they wound tight around her as she cried. "He was so drunk and out of it and yelling about the baby we were never going to have that he threatened to cut me so I never would have another baby with anyone else."
She started crying more just thinking back to the horrific morning and the fear she felt under him as he smashed the beer bottle on the dresser. "He said he never wanted another kid and now it didn't matter, and he always thought I was cheating on him. Any guy ever even looked at me would get beat up by his buddies in the alley and I would pay for it too. He never took me out anywhere because I would just fuck anyone else."
Emily looked up at him with teary eyes. "And I have never the whole time I've known him, cheated on him once. I haven't even looked for more than a few seconds longer in another guy's eyes, let alone kissed someone else ever. Not till you crashed into my life. He accused me of it weekly and I think HE was the one cheating the whole time."
Roman cradled her closer and bent to kiss her forehead as she bit her lip. "God Baby girl, I cannot imagine."
"And when I did fight him trying to cut me freaking open that morning, he hit me more and he threw me against the floor length mirror, and I got cut up badly on that glass too." She peeled the bandage off her the side of her hip and saw how deep the cuts and torn skin were there from the glass cutting her.
He shifted them so he could reach her there and half laid her down and moved his hoodie up enough to caress and lightly kiss and lick around both of those wounds too on her belly and her hip. Roman had given his tender touch and kisses to every one of her bad cuts as she had revealed how she got them and told their story this morning and the intimacy of that felt incredible.
He pulled himself back up and she crawled back in his lap. Emily buried her head more under his hair again and already missing holding him those precious few moments. "I was crying and covered in blood on the floor, and he dragged me back to the bed. And it was only then that he saw I was wearing his favorite outfit. He had been in such a blind rage before that."
Her arms went tighter around her Superman right now, her nose against his throat as she felt his hair all down around her like her own personal blanket. Roman was silent right then and she wondered if he was scared of what she would say next. She could feel his pulse racing in his veins by his throat under her lips.
She forced herself to continue and shut her eyes. "I crawled away from him seeing the look in his eye that he was going have me yet whatever damn way he wanted. I felt his hand on my shoulder and he tore the sleeve of the lingerie and pulled me up and threw me on the bed on my stomach. It was going to be bad I just knew it. "
Emily could feel Roman's arms around her holding her tighter as she spoke, and she knew this must be gutting him.
"Oh, Jesus Baby, I was right there...I was right outside..." Roman barely breathed out. "Fucking hell..."
Emily lifted her head and offered him a weak smile and saw he had tears slipping down his cheeks. "I know Roman. If I only knew you were, I would have run to you right then. But it doesn't go like you think...something must have stopped him. He stumbled or fell against the wall or slipped on the glass on the floor. But I turned from knowing what was about to happen to seeing him slip and fall down the wall and look dizzy or partially knocked out, like he banged his head. "
Roman let out an audible sigh and she could feel the breath in him release and he dropped his head to hers, his large hand cradling her head. "Thank God," he breathed out.
"I know," she whimpered, feeling him cradling her head and his tears dripped onto her face. He was crying for her pain. He had been scared for her. This was so new to her. No one had ever cared about her the way Roman was right now. No man had ever cried for her pain before him.
Emily pushed herself to finish the story, feeling safe in his arms and stronger to continue. "When I saw him slip down the wall I got dressed fast. Granted I wasn't in anything warm, but the closest thing was my lace tank top and shorts I had on before when I was with you, and I slipped them on. I should have just not cared what I was wearing and just ran in whatever, but I just wasn't thinking clearly at all.
At first all I thought of was I needed to cover the lingerie after seeing the look in his eyes. He wanted to destroy me for ruining his plan. And I wasn't sure I would ever get Livey back now. So, I put on anything I could reach as fast as I could. I was determined that I was going to run and find you and somehow find my daughter."
Emily drew in a deeper breath. "The afternoon before when I was still pregnant with Hope Roman, I could still feel her kicking so strong and she was doing so well. I had never intended to get pregnant again at all after Hunter stole Liv from me, but he promised me to give her back if I could give him a son and he could get his damn inheritance. He would give proof to his uncle of his heir and all that stupid crap, and he would actually let us go.
I don't know if I believed any of it at all I had to hope in something. It felt so wrong to ever subject a child to him even a little boy or anyone and I had snuck using birth control for a long time, but he had found that out at one time too and destroyed it. That was the first time he ever hurt me and so I did end up pregnant and even miscarried a couple times before Hope managed to fight and push past the 12-week mark. I was trying so hard to not drag anyone else into the mess of a life Hunter had me trapped in already."
Roman cuddled her closer and kept listening. She nuzzled her head more against his and closed her eyes, stroking her hand over her empty belly, still feeling the ache for her baby. She felt his palm spread over hers too and lace her fingers with his. She turned her head to his to meet his gaze and almost burst back into tears again at the sadness on his face. But he encouraged her to keep going and she sucked in another shaky breath.
"I went to one of the doctor's appointments alone and found out that the baby I finally managed to carry past 20 weeks, Hope was a girl and begged the doctor not to tell him. I was so scared he would somehow force me get rid of her so I lied and told him I was having his son and I did everything I could to protect her...till that afternoon. He got a call about an ultrasound appointment and the nurse, or something said the wrong thing and she told him over the phone and when he hung up and looked back at me, I just knew he knew."
"Oh Emmie, my God what happened?" Roman gasped out and wrapped his arms tighter around her.
"He exploded with rage at me and threw me against the fridge and the wall and kicked me in the stomach multiple times against the floor in the corner before he stormed out screaming that I was a lying whore, and the baby probably wasn't even his."
Emily was choking on sobs now as she clung to Roman as she could hardly get the words out she was trying to share. " I wanted to just curl up and die right there after I laid there and couldn't feel her kicking anymore. I waited and cried and held onto my belly and sang to her and begged her to kick and was too weak to get up for a half hour or more before I finally dragged myself up. She didn't move and I wanted to just give up and end it right there. I was never going to find my baby and my other baby had likely just died and I couldn't even protect her while she was in me!"
She looked up at him with tears streaming down her face and he stroked her cheeks and wiped them away as they continued to fall. "I'm so embarrassed to say that I pulled out a knife from the kitchen drawer and just sat there staring at it, wondering what it would feel like to slice my skin and let the blood flow and just drift away. I had no idea how to save Livey and I couldn't feel my baby kicking anymore Roman and I just stared at the knife as I cried."
Emily saw more tears in his eyes then too as he still held her on his lap, and she felt his lips drop to her cheeks and kiss away more of her tears as they mingled with his.
"God Emmie, just that you are here in my arms feels like a freaking miracle after hearing what you are sharing," he whispered against her cheek. "Thank you so much for letting me in."
Her arms wound so tight around his neck as she cried more. "Thank you for saving me," she whimpered. "I did want to die but I guess God had other plans and the phone rang and somehow I just felt I needed to answer it. It was woman on the other end, and she was frantic and saying she knew where my Livey was. She had been the one watching her, and that Hunter was trying to take her away and I needed to come now before it was too late.
I scrambled to write down the address and grabbed my passport and hers from the safe in Hunters office. He didn't know I knew the code at all, and that our stuff was in there. I just never had any idea where she was till now ever so it was useless to take it before. I grabbed a wad of money, and I threw my boots on and was out the door and ran to the bus station. I didn't even grab a jacket or realized it was so cold out till I was halfway down the block and by then I just kept running. I was going to disappear with my daughter, and I didn't care where we ended up as long as we were together. I was starting to feel cramping and pain in my belly by then too and part of me thought I should go to the hospital, but I needed to get on that bus and get to Liv."
"And that's when you ran into me," Roman said softly. "My God I had no idea. All I saw was a scared woman that was shivering and was in such a hurry."
Emily nodded at him. "I know and it looked like you were going to give me your jacket just like that and you didn't even know me at all."
Roman smiled and rocked her more in his arms, kissing her hair. "I was. You looked cold and it just felt like it wasn't even a question at all to help you. I was captivated by you instantly. I can't even explain it. But you were gone so fast, and I thought I would never see you again."
"Well, the mugging you saw and came running to rescue me from was Hunter sending his goons after me when he must have found out I was missing and that I got into the safe. They took my purse with everything in it, so now Hunter has mine and Livy's passports again too and I had no other money and no way to run from him even if I had found her. God knows what happened to the woman that warned me, but he must have found out quick that she told me and sent them after me to stop me from getting on that bus. I have no idea what they might have done to me if you hadn't been there either Roman or what Hunter would have let them do."
Roman cupped her head and kissed her hair again. "I am just so glad I was and before I forget I wanted to let you know my buddy that I'm renting from I want to try to talk to him and asked Dean to bring him here this morning. Maybe he can help us somehow. I don't believe he would ever be a part of the kind of stuff your husband is into and maybe we can get him to help us find the guys who mugged us, or he could get the damn cop we kidnapped to turn on your ass of a husband. There has to be a way or something we can do. Maybe someone else knows where your daughter is. We can't give up. I'm going to keep fighting till she is back in your arms."
Emily whimpered slightly again so glad to hear that he had hope and she felt so weak that she was relying on his strength right now.
"Thank you, baby. I trust you so if you think he could help then I am willing to try. I needed to feel that there was any kind path forward after it felt like nothing but darkness. I need your strength so much Roman." He smiled back at her when she said that, rubbing her back under his hoodie again.
"Well like I said I can't promise anything with Seth but it's a risk I think we need to take. We can't just hide in here and wait till your husband gets back from his damn mission and finds you gone or the cop we have kidnapped says the wrong thing to him in a message. I still don't know what the hell to do with him at all either. I don't even want to check the phone for more and see if he wants more. I just want to pretend both assholes don't exist, but I know that isn't possible." He stroked her hair by her face and kissed her head. "Whatever it takes, I think we need to get Seth on our side."
Emily was nodding to him and agreeing. They couldn't just hide here and hope everything magically went away. They needed a plan to get her daughter back. "It's been so exhausting fighting alone. I tried to go to people just once higher up than the police when I was in the hospital and Hunter left me alone long enough without any guards or monitoring. I called someone in Internal Affairs a couple months ago and started to try to tell them my story, but I hung up fast and never followed up or met with anyone again and was too scared I could get caught and what he could do to me if he did catch me trying to report him or what he might do to Livey. So, I just left it, but I did try."
Roman was nodding at that and kissed her head again. "I cannot imagine how scared you would have been to try to reach out and not know who to trust or who might still be working for the corrupt cops baby. I am so sorry. I wish I had known you sooner, been here sooner."
Emily was sniffling and nodding too. "And I just wish I had told you sooner too about him in the hospital and then maybe you wouldn't have felt so rejected and pulled away and I might not have gone back with him that night. I was so scared to go back to that house, but I didn't want you to get caught in my mess of a life either and face so much danger too."
Roman looked deeply back in her eyes, sighed and dropped his head to hers. "If I had known half of what you just told me now, I would have never left you there that night again baby." His eyes fell closed and he sucked air in through his teeth.
"God I am so sorry. I walked you that door and kissed you goodbye thinking that I needed to just let you go because I thought a crush on a married woman wasn't what I wanted in a new town. I thought you wanted to cheat on him and the way you were kissing me and begging me to take you away felt just wrong and selfish."
His eyes opened so slowly with tears pooling at his dark lashes and slipping down his cheeks as his chin quivered. "I had no fucking idea how much you needed me. All you wanted was to be safe after your own husband literally killed your baby. Jesus that just sounds unreal."
Roman's head fell to her shoulder, and she felt him curling it in as close to her throat and nuzzling her with his nose under his hoodie on her. Emily cradled the back of his head and rubbed her fingers in his hair like she knew he loved so much, and he moaned against her neck.
"Mmm how in the hell could anyone want to hurt you?" he mumbled into her skin. "I just want to hide you away Emmie. Wrap you in my arms and take anything anyone dares to throw at you. I'll let it hurt me, hit me first and never get to you."
Emily smiled and kept rubbing his head. "Mmm I wish you could have that morning. It was my fault that I didn't tell you anything or enough to know what was going on."
Roman was shaking his head at her, his eyes still closed and head down. "No none of this is your fault. Don't you dare blame yourself."
She nodded. "I know, but it still hurts that I didn't tell you. Maybe then I wouldn't have gotten beaten so badly. Maybe then I could have been safe here with you that night."
There was one more thing she hadn't told him, one more part of her injuries she was so scared to reveal and Roman was still laying with his head down, all curled up on her shoulder on his hoodie. She had already dumped so much, and she saw how everything had affected him already, how devastated he had been and maybe that was enough, and she was pushing this too much already.
Her fingers kept rubbing at his hair the base of his neck and she could hear him groaning in pleasure as she knew how much he loved it when she did that. It was soothing her too just to hear that she could please him and make him feel good, especially after the horrors she just shared.
"Roman there is one more thing and I am scared to tell you." Emily just said fast and then waited for his reply. "And I know I need to."
Slowly he lifted his head from her shoulder and gazed deeply in her eyes, his own so wide and full of depth and yet she could see the confusion and worry cross his features. He sat up more and rested his hands in her lap and laced his fingers with hers, his eyes locked to her own.
"Okay, then please just tell me so it doesn't have you so scared. Trust and let me carry it too." She dropped her eyes from his and frowned and he lifted a knuckle to bring her chin back up. "I mean it Beautiful. Whatever it is, whatever you think is so bad, will not change how I feel. Will not break us, but I can see it is trying to break you by hiding it."
She nodded and bit her lip with more tears in her eyes. "I can run away from him Roman, but I can't run from this..."
Emily took in a deep breath and knew she needed to tell him the rest of the story. She needed to trust him that he wasn't going to reject her or push her away. Nothing that happened was anything she could have stopped. All it was, was more proof that Hunter owned her, and she was scared that Roman wouldn't be able to handle that. It already made her sick.
Choking back a sob of fear Emily pulled the hood up over her head and buried her head against his shoulder, her eyes tightly closed. "Okay. I am so terrified to share this, " she whispered, and she felt his head nuzzled right against hers, but he was quiet and his arms tight around her. "I had tried to run but I had barely made it a few feet when he grabbed me back by my hair and threw me back down on the bed and was screaming at me that I would never get away from him. The next second I knew he was straddling me and forcing my hand in the handcuff, and I was trapped on the bed."
Emily was buried in Roman's hoodie and was already in awe of how warm and cozy another one of his pieces of clothing made her feel. She drowned in the size of it on her now did not want to come out of the safety of the feeling of it wrapped around her. But ever so slowly now she moved her legs apart as she still lay tucked up tight on his lap and showed him the last bandage. The worst one.
This was the one she never said a word about before and he never touched or asked about either. It was in a way too private place, and she had not offered up that information yet either.
She saw him looking down in her eyes and then following her gaze to the bandaged skin of her inner thigh. The others he had kissed around the damaged skin and here this one she needed to show him up close, as much as it would hurt to see it.
She sucked up tears as she tried to force her voice to be normal now. "I don't remember much once he had me cuffed to the bed. I think I blacked out from getting hit in the head from the headboard. He always says he never hits me and that when he tells anyone that he isn't lying. He just throws me into things, but never actually hits me himself," she whimpered sadly and saw Roman's beyond sad expression back at her.
"This last bandage I hadn't said anything about, and you didn't ask. Hunter said he heard a con at the station mention it once, that he uses this with his guys so people know who he owns...so he thought he would try his little dominant trick on me too."
Emily slowly peeled back the gauze from the bandaged skin and wiped it clean with the cloth on the nightstand. The stitches were healing she could see, and the scars were fading. Thank God. But that would do nothing for what was still buried around the cuts.
She sniffled and saw him looking at it and she nodded as he saw it the more reddened skin and his eyes fell closed and his head dropped. "I'll bet you didn't see that before when Dean was fixing it up."
Roman was shaking his head slowly, his eyes down. "No, I didn't see it. God Baby I am so sorry. Is that what I think it looks like?"
Emily felt her shoulders shaking more as she still lay in his lap and nodded. "I woke up to that and didn't even feel it when he did it. No idea how that was possible at all. Maybe he drugged me or something or numbed the skin. But I didn't wake up when it happened. I did feel really out of it when I first saw you by the bed and thought I was dreaming that you were even there so I wouldn't put it past him to have drugged me somehow.
But he said it was so anyone I would dare cheat on him with would see his ring insignia if they ever wanted me and know I was his. The dollar sign with the H behind it he said was what he used to show the other assholes in prison who were his bitches and on his payroll. He let everyone know who he owned that way." Emily felt a sob burst from her lips as she looked back up in Roman's eyes.
"So, because I couldn't give him a son like he wanted he told me, now I was just property just like the ones on his payroll in prison or otherwise. And the ring was how he marked people for that. It's so sick and I couldn't believe it when I saw it and I knew that was all I was to him then. It was probably all I ever was, but I truly didn't realize it till right that moment."
Her breath was coming in gasping pants now. "So now why? Why would you want me Roman? Every time you see me you will see this. Every time you kiss me here, please me, make love to me you would fucking see it. God, part of my fear with us was I knew this was here and I was SO scared you would reject me once you saw it and knew how clearly Hunter thinks he owns me."
Roman looked deeply into her eyes and she saw an almost scolding look back at her. He gently lifted her higher from where she was still practically hiding in a ball on his chest and pulled the hood down and smoothed her hair back from her face. "Em do you really think some assholes attempt at acting like your pimp or crap like that would ever stop me from wanting you and making you mine? Really?"
Emily studied him and wasn't sure what to think. Was she all nervous for nothing?
Her hero was stroking the skin around the raised burn mark that was now plainly visible for him to see and he hadn't pushed her away. "Emmie, I cannot imagine the hell you have been through at all. But I do not give up or surrender easily. This ass has a fucking fight coming if he thinks I am just going to roll over and let him take you away from me. It might sound insane, but I will take on the whole damn police department if it means I get to come home to you every night. "
He tipped her chin up. "You are worth it. Believe that. And you sure as hell are not his. Whether he thinks so or not. No woman deserves to ever be treated like you have survived already baby. You are a fucking warrior and not weak at all. Don't ever think that you don't deserve to be happy or deserve me or to finally be freaking free with your daughter. You deserve all that and SO much more."
He looked down at the burn mark on her inner thigh and stroked around it with his thumb. "Do you actually think when I said I can see past all the bruises and damage on your skin to see the fiery woman underneath that I can't see past this?"
Emily was watching him just absently caressing her thigh around the scarred skin and started shaking her head back and forth.
Roman shook his head too and smiled looking like he was glad she was understanding him. "Damn right. Beautiful, that man tried to scar you and take away your outer beauty and even fucking hell tried to take away your God given right to have babies. And I want babies in our future, so he has no fucking right to touch that. But he tried, and has you so scared that burning you with his what? His mafia style symbol will keep others from daring to cross him?"
He smirked and literally grinned at her. "He hasn't seen a thing yet if he thinks that is all it takes keep me away from you.
Can I show you Beautiful how little it matters that the ass has tried to mark you like that? Can I turn the bad memories good?" Roman looked back up in her eyes as he spoke and watched her nod slowly to him as she felt her heart racing in anticipation of what he was going to do. She had barely processed that he said he wanted babies in their future, and they needed to get back to talking about that, but she could already feel him gently lifting her off his lap and this was not the time to talk about babies.
Slowly he laid her down on the bed beside him and scooted lower, peeking up from between her bare legs, still clad only the sexy lace panties and moved his hoodie higher past her waist. Roman dipped his head to kiss slowly up the side of one leg from the side of her knee all the way to her inner thigh and Emily moaned and curled her fingers in the blankets.
Then she watched him move down to the do the same thing on the other side and this time end up all the way back up at the raised skin on the inner thigh. He hovered around it, and she saw him drop to suck the skin in his mouth just slightly to the side of the burned flesh.
"Mmm your skin tastes so sweet Beautiful," Roman moaned. "Does it hurt?" he asked her and lifted his head enough to watch her face.
She shook her head and smiled. "No, feels kind of sensitive but it doesn't hurt." Emily watched him first circle the wound gently with his tongue as he cradled her thighs in his hands. Then Roman carefully kissed the skin all the way around the whole wound and she felt a wave of pleasure at the sensations of his tongue and kisses giving her body tingles in such an intimate place.
"Mmm " he breathed out. "Not his, MINE. Turning the bad memories good. Just like you said." He licked softly then on top of the raised and tender skin that Hunter had burned, and Emily whimpered and felt tears at her lashes that he wasn't rejecting her, and she clutched his head and pulled on his hair as her hips arched up to his lips.
It felt so good. So good to be accepted and protected and not rejected after all she had been through. Closing her eyes, she fell back in the pillows feeling his lips so deliciously soft on her inner thigh as he licked and sucked her skin in his mouth. She didn't feel scared as his mouth explored higher, teasingly kissing at the edges of her lacey underwear.
Emily felt him lift his head and she pulled her own up to see he was seeking her eyes before he nuzzled his nose back down on her underwear again as if asking silent permission for how far they were going here after such a deep and heavy talk.
She found herself nodding slowly and smiling down at him, hungry for more. Not sure how much or even how with her still bleeding a little bit yet. But she felt safe. So so safe in Roman's arms and her eyes widened as the word in her head next was beautiful.
She felt beautiful.
Roman had said he was going to keep calling her that until she believed it.
And suddenly she just had to tell him. "Roman I feel it. Just like you said..." she gasped out.
He lifted his lips from where he was teasing her skin by her hips and slowly starting to nip and lick by her panties.
"What do you feel baby?" he whispered back to her, his eyes so dilated and dark looking back at her.
Emily was beaming at him. "Beautiful." she stated simply and watched the grin spread across his face.
He bent to kiss her belly and was smiling so wide. "I'm so glad Baby girl. You always have been, and I am damn well happy to show you more. But only if you want. Everything is all your choice."
Emily nodded almost shyly as she felt Roman stroke his palms along her sides and saw him dip his head back down again. Nothing in her life had ever been her choice for years. Not being rejected and actually feeling in control of her own choices felt damn near surreal.
She watched him give her one more sexy as hell smile before his eyes dropped back down to her body again and he slowly started edging the lacey underwear lower before his head dipped back between her legs.
Oh God..