27th December 2004

The wedding is just days away, I'm so excited! Robert keeps checking that everything is going to be perfect. I keep telling him to relax but when the phone rings he practically attacks it. The nerves are getting to him. He asked me would I be Mrs Jurgen or Mrs Tatchibanna Jurgen. I said would he be insulted if I kept my name and also took his. He was quite shocked at the idea but said if it made me happy, then I can have my name. Mrs Hilary Tatchibanna Jurgen, it sounds like something so unreal. But it's going to happen. I'll be Robert's wife! My new name sounds more real with each passing day.

Christmas day was wonderful. Robert filled the sitting room with presents for me! He bought me clothes; jewellery, books, perfumes, candy and he got me the cutest little puppy ever! It's a German shepherd and it's so sweet. Everything seems to interest him and he plays gently. I called him Hund.

Robert asked me on Christmas would I enjoy Christmas more if we had a child to unwrap presents with. That took me away a bit. ''Robert, I didn't realise you wanted a child so soon''

''Well I do, I know we agreed to wait a few years but''

''You want a family, don't you?''

''Well if your not comfortable with it, then we can wait for as long as you want. It's selfish or me really, you'd be the one carrying them''

''Them?'' I didn't know he wanted more than one child, I guess it would be nice to have a few.

''Oh I meant it''

''No, you meant them'' I couldn't help but smile. ''I'd love to start a family Robert, especially with you. But I do want to wait until we both feel ready''

''Of course. Hilary if we do want children, how many would you want?'' I thought for a bit.

''Two or three, and you?''

''You'll probably think I'm mad or strange when I say this but five'' he said five very cautiously as if he was embarrassed to even be think about children at his age. He had a light blush on his face.

''Five!'' I was shocked but I smiled in surprise. I didn't know he wanted a large family. I knew he wanted a family but this shocked me.

''I know a ridiculous idea''

''No just a surprise, that's all. So five, how many of each?'' He looked at me softly and pulled me onto his lap.

''Two boys and three girls''

''I thought you would want mostly boys''

''Strangely no, I want three daughters so I can show off how beautiful and smart they are and how they take after their mother'' I was so flattered by this.

''You think I'm beautiful?''

''Yes, you'd have to constantly produce daughters your entire life so all of them collective could be only half as magnificent as you''

''Oh Robbie-kins''

''Yes my sugar dumpling''

''Sugar dumpling? Where'd that come from?''

''I don't know'' I laughed at his silliness and kissed him. He can be really surprising in a nice way. I can't wait for the wedding it's going to be the best and happiest days of my life.