A/N: Emily: George finally gets out of the hole today! Yay! Before I start this chapter I decree that you all must go and read Limpet666's story "Kai" Yes that is right it features everyone's favourite lovable rogue.

Chapter Ten – Holes.

"She has forgotten about me. I know she has!" Pouted George. "Well that's fine! I don't need her anyway. I'll get myself out of this hole!"

Gem let out a very unladylike snort. "There is about as much chance of that happening as George Bush has of saying something smart!"

"We have to get out! I'm bloody starving!" George whined. He looked around desperately for something to eat, his eyes rested upon Cumquat. "Yum…" George began to droll as Cumquat morphed into a chicken leg.

Cumquat whimpered.

"Snap out of it!" Gem poked George in the eye

"Hey! That was uncalled…for…" George hallucinated again as Gem morphed into a floating twiglet.

"Don't you look at me like that. I've already had that monkey try and eat me."

"I have to get out of here, I need food, I need a plan…think…think…I've got it!"

"You have?" Gem raised a sceptical eyebrow.

"We'll dig a staircase into the side of the hole and the mud we dig out we'll put on the floor making ourselves higher so we'll only have to dig half the way!"

"And what are we going to dig with?"

George demonstrated by scratching at the dirt with his fingertips.

An hour later…

"This is stupid." Huffed Gem who was sat upon Cumquat's shoulder watching George. The King of Gondor was presently on his knees resembling Rambo with flu. "You haven't even made a dent!"

"It's just…a…matter…gasp…of time!" Panted George. "Must reach…freedom!" He collapsed.

"Great."

……

"He's in a hole." Yelled Emily.

"Yes you mentioned that. Where is this hole?" Asked Haldir.

Boromir, Haldir and Legolas were currently trying to pry some more details about the location of George from a hysterical Emily.

"I can't remember! He won't have any food with him, he'll be scared!"

"Don't worry, we'll find him I promise." Legolas sat Emily down and followed Haldir and Boromir out of the room closing the door behind him.

"Legolas you know we cannot just ride out blindly and look for him." Reasoned Haldir.

"So we leave him?!"

"That is not what Haldir said. Go and see if you can find out more, jog her memory. We'll go and check his route on map, see if we can narrow down forgotten bear traps or something he may have fallen in." Said Boromir.

"And Kai?" Asked Legolas guiltily.

"You are to stay away from him."

"You can't just leave him in his room!"

"Yes we can and we intend to" Began Haldir.

"If we so much as think you have been within one hundred yards of his room we'll make sure that baby in your wife's tummy is the last heir you ever have." Finished Boromir.

Legolas gulped.

……

"They think they can keep me in my room do they?!" Snarled Kai to himself as he paced his room. "I'll show them, they can't keep me away from my blond prince."

……

"He's coming around" Gem kept slapping George.

"Freedom!" Gasped George as he sat up abruptly.

"You decided to return to us then?" Said Gem smartly.

"That's it!"

"What is?"

"Freedom, that's the answer!"

"Maybe he's concussed." Gem pointed out to the monkey who was pulling at George's trainer lace.

George ignored Gem as she continued to make snide comments and reached for his fish keyring, "Gem make yourself useful and get some rope from my bag."

Gem rummaged through, "I don't see any…urgh…please tell me that is not what I think it is?!"

"Best not to ask." Grinned George.

"Here's the rope." Gem handed it to George then proceeded to wipe her hands on an oblivious Cumquat. "Here's the plan. I tie the rope to the fish. I throw the rope out of the hole, the fish will act as an anchor, with the rope secure we can climb out."

"It won't work."

"It has to!"

George swung the rope around a few times before launching it into the air. He tugged the rope checking if it was secure The fish fell back into the hole."

"I thought you said it had to work."

"I lied." Answered George with a shrug.

"Well it's your best plan yet so I suppose you might as well keep trying."

……

"The hole is an hours ride North-East of Edoras!" Emily squealed as she remembered.

"I'll let Haldir and Boromir know. George will be back here before you know it." Legolas went and quickly found the honeymooners who were currently checking what each other had had for lunch. "Urm…guys…"

"Legolas! I didn't see you there." Haldir greeted as he quickly did Boromir's tunic back up.

"Evidently. Emily has remembered where the hole is."

"Brilliant. Show us on the map."

"Urm…Boromir you are sitting on it." Legolas informed trying to swallow the smirk threatening to emerge.

"Oh so I am." The steward flushed and his himself behind the Marchwarden.

"From what Emily remembers the hole should be around…here." Legolas planted a finger on the, now rather crumpled, map. "We just have to send someone to go and get him."

"Not volunteering yourself?" Asked Haldir.

"I don't want to leave Emily. I have a feeling that this baby will arrive sooner rather than later. Will you go?"

"I am on my honeymoon, and as fond as I am of the boy I want no interruptions!"

"We could always send Kai." Suggested Boromir finally regaining his composure.

"An excellent idea melethron."

Boromir and Haldir stood outside starring at the dark elf's door after knocking for a full five minutes.

"Shall I break it down dear?" Asked Boromir.

"Go ahead; I love when you get forceful."

After two hard thumps the door caved in to reveal and empty room and an open window.

"Bloody elves." Cursed Boromir

Haldir raised a perfectly arched eyebrow.

"I didn't mean you!"

"I'll have to punish you for that."

……

"My arm hurts" Wailed George.

"You've only tried fifty-eight times!"

"Only!"

"Try again!"

"Slave driver." Snapped George.

"Quitter." Threw back Gem.

"Weed."

"Idiot."

"Tinkertwat."

"King of Slobdor!"

"Runt."

"Roadkill!"

"Oh…ooh…choo…pwh!" Scolded Cumquat.

"What did he say?" Asked Gem.

"He said that we are behaving like children and that we will not get out of here by bickering."

"He said all that?"

"To a point." George sighed in frustration and lobbed the keyring out the hole in one last vain attempt. He tugged on it…

"It worked!" George tugged harder but the fish remained anchored on whatever it had clung to. "I'm a genius!"

"That can be debated." Muttered Gem.

"Huh?"

"I said, you are to be congratulated." She smirked.

"Cheers. Right Cumquat, hang on tight we are going climbing."

After three attempts George finally scrambled out of the hole kissing the grass leaving a fearful Cumquat to sigh in relief.

"We're free!"

"About time." Huffed Gem as she removed a spec of dirt from her immaculately kept blue dress.

"I wonder what…" George followed the rope to where his fish had landed. "It looks like a pile of dog food."

"You're just hungry! No wait… you're right it does look like a pile of dog food. Ah! It moved!"

George got a little closer.

"I think we should leave it alone." Whimpered Gem.

"I have to get my fish." George tiptoed over and when near enough gently (viciously with intent to kill) kicked it turning it over onto its back. "Aragorn!"

……

A/N: Emily: There you are all the Aragorn fans, he is back! Ooooh where has Kai gone?! Here are the thank yous:

Angel's Heart, Demon's Mind – Noooo. Don't run away! Oh poo. It must be so horrible living in Florida, what with all that sunshine!

Lil Smartass – You little beep I was all nice in my last reply and you come up with that remark. In return this time I'll just let everyone know that you won a Tracy Beaker look-alike competition.

Voyd – George prier to the catsuit incident was wearing a bright orange suit which in real life he is actually threatening to wear to my wedding.

Poolbum – I love Kalin too! You can check him out in Limpet666's story! I might actually write him back in if more people ask.

Galasriniel – I like purple jelly, probably because I like blackcurrants, with exception to when they are spilt over my dress!