Chapter 8: Realizations of a Princess.
A/N: Thanks for everybody's reviews. I am quite proud of myself of course, people are so crazy about this story, I'm getting threatened! It's awesome. And you lucky bunch of weenies get updates, even during Christmas. Umm, so let me see...I was rambling too much. But once again, I shall continue. I mean, I am writing a fanfiction after all.
The day Gojyo left, wasn't a happy one. Yaone was torn inside. But she didn't know exactly why. But when Gojyo left, he took every bit of happiness with him. The bit of happiness he made himself, trying his best to ignore the fact that this wasn't the best enviornment for two gay lovers, one a peasant and one a prince to be happy. But he tried, he tried to make it work and failed.
Yaone was confused of course. How this, out of all the things her father has done, has hurt her the most. Patching Goku's physical and emotional wounds, were a struggle in itself. He wasn't hurt physically as much as emotionally. According to Sanzo, Goku still won't sleep in a bed by himself, and would always share the bed with Sanzo now and he's been crying for almost five days now. Sanzo's had to keep a good eye on him, making sure he drinks lots of water, sleeps and eats. Dispite the depression weighing down on him. Sanzo is worried about Goku. Yaone is worried about outcomes.
But Yaone's most concern at this time, was Hakkai. Hakkai hadn't witnessed anything. He couldn't. But perhaps, Hakkai made a visual. He could hear the awful things going on around him, and feel Gojyo's warm blood against his fingertips. Hakkai had shut down. He wouldn't eat, hardly slept, never went outside anymore. Hakkai didn't see a reason for living. First his mother, now Gojyo. It was too much.
" Hakkai?" Yaone asked, walking into Hakkai's room. She looked at his bed, and it was empty. But she looked to the other side of the room and there he was, in Gojyo's bed, wrapped almost too tightly in the blankets that him and his lover slept in. The pain in Hakkai's heart was unbearable, and Yaone could see that.
" Hmm?" Hakkai choked out.
Yaone sighed. This was not a happy time at all. " I, umm, brought you some food."
" I don't want any."
" You sure? It's kappa rolls, aren't those your favorites?"
She heard Hakkai cough, and then start to cry. He gripped the silked sheets.
" Those..." he coughed between gasps for breaths from his hard tears. " Are Gojyo's favorites..."
" Oh." Yaone sighed. It pained her so much to watch this. Hakkai needed to get over it. I know that was hard. But he can't kill himself over this. Gojyo wasn't dead, he just wasn't around. " Hakkai, I'm sorry, for being so brutially honest, but you need to snap out of this."
" Have you ever had people you love?" Hakkai asked, his tears easing a little bit. " Somebody you loved so much, it ached when they weren't around. It hurt, even when I knew he was there, but wasn't next to me. Even when he went to get me water, I'd have to restrain myself from just stopping him and saying, don't leave me, ever." Hakkai said, his tears starting to erupt again.
" Hakkai--"
" You don't know how I feel. Father doesn't know how I feel. Nobody does. I want him back. I want my Gojyo back..."
" I know, I know you want him back." Yaone sighed, sitting on the bed next to her brother. " And I know it hurts. But you won't get anywhere if you sit here and cry. Goku's hurting too, and Sanzo's hurting because Goku is. And that's how I am with you. I'm hurting because you are. And don't forget, she was my mother too."
" But what should I do?"
" Stop crying and eat. Imagine what Gojyo would say if he saw you like this!" Yaone said, trying to smile.
" He'd probably get me up and force me to eat." Hakkai said, laughing a little.
" Well there you go. Think about your good times with him, not the sad."
" But, I never got to say goodbye to him. I'll never see him again, Yaone."
" I know. And that will be changed. Tonight, Goku, Sanzo, Dokugakuji and Kougaiji are going to go find Gojyo for you. But it will only be for one night. And I will make sure, on my life, that nobody will bother you two."
" Yaone..." Hakkai smiled, almost starting to cry again.
" I sent them out already." Yaone said, running her hands through her brother's hair. " All you do have to is wait. But you have to promise me something."
" What is it?"
" You have to eat." Yaone smiled, putting the tray of food on her brother's lap.
" Anything to see Gojyo." Hakkai nodded.
" I'm going to go wait in the front for them, you eat." Yaone said, leaving the room. She closed the door behind her and sighed in relief. She had one thing off of her chest. But she still had the issue of trying to get Gojyo into the castle without her father knowing.
Homura was especially irrate with Hakkai lately. Hakkai couldn't even leave the room without getting hounded by Homura about what had gone on between them. And nothing even really happened, sexually at least.
But surely, that would happen tonight. This would be the last time they would be able to see each other.
And in a final realization of that, Yaone started to cry. Her brother must have been hurting so much.
I'm sorry, Hakkai. Yaone thought, wiping her tears on her gloves. She had no time for cyring. She had people she cared about risking their lives to make Yaone happy, and Yaone's happiness, meant her brother's happiness. She wasn't only sacrificing herself, she was sacrificing Kougaiji and Dokugakuji and Sanzo and Goku too.
This wasn't about her anymore, like it was when her and Hakkai were younger.
" This is about him now." Yaone smiled, leaving to the front to wait for her guards, no, friends, to bring Gojyo back to her brother.
A/N: This chapter was a bit more Yaone-centric. But I liked it. Sorry if I wrote a little too much.