Rory had kind of been avoiding Sebastian since her freak-out in the library
a week ago. Of course, avoiding him meant avoiding the stacks and the book
club, giving her much more time to think about Jess. God how she missed
him. She missed him so much it hurt.
It wasn't fair! Why did he always get to leave? Why did he always get to be the one doing the hurting? Not that she really wanted to hurt Jess. . . that was the last thing she wanted. She just wanted her hurt to go away. And she knew one way to make it happen.
Calling Jess had crossed her mind, but then she realized that she didn't even have his phone number. She supposed she could have gotten it from Luke, but she didn't want to seem desparate. No, she knew one other way to make herself feel better. She had to stop avoiding Sebastian. But she knew that by calling him, she would force herself into a situation in which she would be required to tell him why she had been so upset. She was going to have to talk about Jess, and this was going to be the first time she had spoken about him since he left.
She slid off her bed and picked up the gray phone the school had given her. She dialed Sebastian's four digit extension and waited for him to pick up. Rang once. Twice. Three times. And then she reached voicemail. "Hey, it's Sebastian. Either I'm screening my calls, unplugged my phone, or I'm not here. Leave a message." Beep.
"Hey, Sebastian. It's me. Me being me, Rory. Hey. So, um, I haven't seen you in a while, and I was wondering if you wanted to get together. Maybe grab some coffee this afternoon around two. Lemme know. Extension 7443. Bye."
She hung up the phone. She had never been very good at leaving phone messages, and this one was no exception. Her voice sounded jerky and fake. Oh well, at least she had done it. She had called him and she would explain what happened and she would have her friend back. In the nearly two months she had been at Yale, Sebastian was easily her closest friend, and without him she suddenly felt as if she had no friends. She couldn't count the number of times she had almost gotten in her car and gone home or almost begged Lorelai to come up and visit her during one of the phone calls they shared throughout the day. But she hadn't wanted to seem like a baby, so she had sucked it up. Having Sebastian back would make it a lot better.
She walked over to her bookshelf to look for a book to read when her phone rang.
"Hello?"
"Rory? It's Sebastian."
"Oh. Hey."
"I got your message. I was just in the shower. Still up for coffee?"
"As always," she responded.
"Wanna go now?"
"Now? Sure, why not?"
"Great. I'll come by your dorm in like ten minutes."
"Call up when you get here and I'll come down. The numbers are posted on the door."
"OK, I'll be there soon."
"K, bye."
Rory hung up the phone. Well, he hadn't spoken any differently. Maybe he had forgiven her for her crying fit and then her avoiding him for a week. Or maybe he was just being nice.
Rory slipped on her sneakers and grabbed a denim jacket from her closet. She got her wallet and counted ten dollars out of it, which she slipped into her pocket. The phone rang and she picked it up, "Hello?"
"It's me."
"I'll be right down." She hung up the phone and walked down the stairs.
"Hey."
"Hey."
The two began walking in the direction of downtown New Haven, neither one of them starting the conversation.
"So how are your classes?" Sebastian asked in an attempt to break the extremely awkward silence.
"My classes? Oh, they're good. They're pretty good. How about you? How are your classes?"
"My classes are good too."
"That's good."
"Yeah, it is."
They walked in silence again until they reached the coffee shop in New Haven.
"Hey Rory. Coffee?" Tim behind the counter asked her.
"Yeah, thanks Tim. Black."
"Of course."
"I'll have the same," said Sebastian.
"Will this be together or separate?" Tim asked.
"Together," Sebastian interjected, sliding a five across the counter. "My treat," he added to Rory.
"Thank you," she said.
"No problem."
Tim handed them their coffees and they found a table in the back of the small shop.
"You know him?" Sebastian asked, refering to Tim.
"Oh, yeah. I'm a frequent shopper."
"You're an addict."
"Hey! Look who's talking!" Rory said, pointing to Sebastian's cup.
"This is my first today. What's that, your third?"
"Fourth," Rory said, embarassed. "But it's not my fault! My mom raised me like this!"
"Your mom sounds cool. It's cool that you guys are friends."
"Yeah, she's awesome. Maybe you'll meet her next time she's up here."
"Yeah, maybe."
There was a short silence before Rory cleared her throat and began to speak. "Sebastian? I wanted to talk to you about what happened in the stacks."
"Don't worry about it."
"No, you deserve to know what happened. I mean, I know I freaked out, and I probably freaked you out too, and it was over Hemingway!"
"Hey, some people don't like stuff. I freak out if people put parsley on my food."
"No, no, that's not the point. It's just. . . this is kind of hard."
"I told you you don't have to worry about it."
"No, I want you to know. OK. Here goes. Um, back home I had this boyfriend. . ."
"Of course. . . and what, he broke up with you that day or something?"
"No, no, not exactly. Um. . . see, he was kind of like you and me in the way that he loved to read. And well, Hemingway was his favorite. Then, he, well, he had been living with his uncle Luke. Luke who runs Luke's diner? I think I mentioned him. . ."
"Yeah, you did."
"Yeah, well, anyways, he went to California to live with his dad and he kind of left without saying goodbye to me. You see, we were kind of in a fight. Anyways, Luke found a copy of that book in Jess' room after he left and he gave it to me. And now it just kind of makes me miss him. . . "
"Jess is your boyfriend."
"Yeah. Or was now, I guess. I'm not really sure. I guess we're broken up. We never really said anything about it. So I'm sorry about my freak out. Even I wouldn't have guessed that that book would have affected me so much." Rory looked down at her hands.
"Don't worry about it. Everyone's had a hard breakup. It takes time for things to be right again."
"I guess. . ."
"We won't read any more Hemingway, I promise. I spit in his general direction."
"Thanks," Rory tried to muster up a smile, but it only came up as half. Luckily, Sebastian didn't notice. He just got up to ger some cream for his coffee.
"Cheater!"
"Hey, not everyone has as strong a stomach for this stuff as you do." Sebastian smiled, and Rory smiled back, but this time her smile was genuine.
It wasn't fair! Why did he always get to leave? Why did he always get to be the one doing the hurting? Not that she really wanted to hurt Jess. . . that was the last thing she wanted. She just wanted her hurt to go away. And she knew one way to make it happen.
Calling Jess had crossed her mind, but then she realized that she didn't even have his phone number. She supposed she could have gotten it from Luke, but she didn't want to seem desparate. No, she knew one other way to make herself feel better. She had to stop avoiding Sebastian. But she knew that by calling him, she would force herself into a situation in which she would be required to tell him why she had been so upset. She was going to have to talk about Jess, and this was going to be the first time she had spoken about him since he left.
She slid off her bed and picked up the gray phone the school had given her. She dialed Sebastian's four digit extension and waited for him to pick up. Rang once. Twice. Three times. And then she reached voicemail. "Hey, it's Sebastian. Either I'm screening my calls, unplugged my phone, or I'm not here. Leave a message." Beep.
"Hey, Sebastian. It's me. Me being me, Rory. Hey. So, um, I haven't seen you in a while, and I was wondering if you wanted to get together. Maybe grab some coffee this afternoon around two. Lemme know. Extension 7443. Bye."
She hung up the phone. She had never been very good at leaving phone messages, and this one was no exception. Her voice sounded jerky and fake. Oh well, at least she had done it. She had called him and she would explain what happened and she would have her friend back. In the nearly two months she had been at Yale, Sebastian was easily her closest friend, and without him she suddenly felt as if she had no friends. She couldn't count the number of times she had almost gotten in her car and gone home or almost begged Lorelai to come up and visit her during one of the phone calls they shared throughout the day. But she hadn't wanted to seem like a baby, so she had sucked it up. Having Sebastian back would make it a lot better.
She walked over to her bookshelf to look for a book to read when her phone rang.
"Hello?"
"Rory? It's Sebastian."
"Oh. Hey."
"I got your message. I was just in the shower. Still up for coffee?"
"As always," she responded.
"Wanna go now?"
"Now? Sure, why not?"
"Great. I'll come by your dorm in like ten minutes."
"Call up when you get here and I'll come down. The numbers are posted on the door."
"OK, I'll be there soon."
"K, bye."
Rory hung up the phone. Well, he hadn't spoken any differently. Maybe he had forgiven her for her crying fit and then her avoiding him for a week. Or maybe he was just being nice.
Rory slipped on her sneakers and grabbed a denim jacket from her closet. She got her wallet and counted ten dollars out of it, which she slipped into her pocket. The phone rang and she picked it up, "Hello?"
"It's me."
"I'll be right down." She hung up the phone and walked down the stairs.
"Hey."
"Hey."
The two began walking in the direction of downtown New Haven, neither one of them starting the conversation.
"So how are your classes?" Sebastian asked in an attempt to break the extremely awkward silence.
"My classes? Oh, they're good. They're pretty good. How about you? How are your classes?"
"My classes are good too."
"That's good."
"Yeah, it is."
They walked in silence again until they reached the coffee shop in New Haven.
"Hey Rory. Coffee?" Tim behind the counter asked her.
"Yeah, thanks Tim. Black."
"Of course."
"I'll have the same," said Sebastian.
"Will this be together or separate?" Tim asked.
"Together," Sebastian interjected, sliding a five across the counter. "My treat," he added to Rory.
"Thank you," she said.
"No problem."
Tim handed them their coffees and they found a table in the back of the small shop.
"You know him?" Sebastian asked, refering to Tim.
"Oh, yeah. I'm a frequent shopper."
"You're an addict."
"Hey! Look who's talking!" Rory said, pointing to Sebastian's cup.
"This is my first today. What's that, your third?"
"Fourth," Rory said, embarassed. "But it's not my fault! My mom raised me like this!"
"Your mom sounds cool. It's cool that you guys are friends."
"Yeah, she's awesome. Maybe you'll meet her next time she's up here."
"Yeah, maybe."
There was a short silence before Rory cleared her throat and began to speak. "Sebastian? I wanted to talk to you about what happened in the stacks."
"Don't worry about it."
"No, you deserve to know what happened. I mean, I know I freaked out, and I probably freaked you out too, and it was over Hemingway!"
"Hey, some people don't like stuff. I freak out if people put parsley on my food."
"No, no, that's not the point. It's just. . . this is kind of hard."
"I told you you don't have to worry about it."
"No, I want you to know. OK. Here goes. Um, back home I had this boyfriend. . ."
"Of course. . . and what, he broke up with you that day or something?"
"No, no, not exactly. Um. . . see, he was kind of like you and me in the way that he loved to read. And well, Hemingway was his favorite. Then, he, well, he had been living with his uncle Luke. Luke who runs Luke's diner? I think I mentioned him. . ."
"Yeah, you did."
"Yeah, well, anyways, he went to California to live with his dad and he kind of left without saying goodbye to me. You see, we were kind of in a fight. Anyways, Luke found a copy of that book in Jess' room after he left and he gave it to me. And now it just kind of makes me miss him. . . "
"Jess is your boyfriend."
"Yeah. Or was now, I guess. I'm not really sure. I guess we're broken up. We never really said anything about it. So I'm sorry about my freak out. Even I wouldn't have guessed that that book would have affected me so much." Rory looked down at her hands.
"Don't worry about it. Everyone's had a hard breakup. It takes time for things to be right again."
"I guess. . ."
"We won't read any more Hemingway, I promise. I spit in his general direction."
"Thanks," Rory tried to muster up a smile, but it only came up as half. Luckily, Sebastian didn't notice. He just got up to ger some cream for his coffee.
"Cheater!"
"Hey, not everyone has as strong a stomach for this stuff as you do." Sebastian smiled, and Rory smiled back, but this time her smile was genuine.