The White Dog
by Becky Tailweaver
Chapter 9: The Choice
"Kagome?"
Inuyasha found her standing in the far corner of Kaede's hut, facing the wall and trying not to cry. "What's the matter with you?" he asked, his voice soft yet gruff--as it had been in the cave.
"Nothing!" she insisted, refusing to look at him.
"Then why are you crying?"
"I'm not!"
"You sure sound like it," Inuyasha growled, covering his concern with curtness.
Kagome turned to face him at last, her eyes red yet her face dry--testament to the monumental effort she made to contain her tears. "You were kissing her!"
Inuyasha jerked back as if she'd slapped him. "What? I was not! The bitch tried to kiss me! I didn't let her do it, you know!" Another thought occurred to him, making him narrow his eyes. "And just why are you so upset about it, anyway?"
Kagome's cheeks quickly matched her eyes as she balled her fists, sputtered, and fought for an answer. "I...because I...because...she...she's evil! That's why!" she finally got out. "She's horrible! Can't you see that? She has evil eyes and she snarls whenever she looks at me! She has some kind of terrible plan for you--I just know it!"
Inuyasha folded his arms and gazed at her, a faint smirk on his face. "And you're jealous because she's evil?"
Amazingly, Kagome's face achieved an even brighter shade of red. "I am not jealous!" she screeched--loud enough to make Ginnezu, who was sitting on the roof listening, wince and cover her sensitive ears. At ground zero, poor Inuyasha was nearly deafened.
By the time Inuyasha was able to unpin his ears, Kagome actually had tears welling up, leaving glistening tracks down either cheek. "I am not jealous," she informed him, getting her voice under control. "What you do is your business."
Startled, he stared at her. She was trembling, but her voice was suddenly icy calm. "I was just worried about you," Kagome went on. "Ginnezu is a youkai, so she's crafty and she's evil. She wants you to go with her very much--even I can see that. I thought she put a spell on you or something!" She was beginning to lose her composure again. "I thought she was doing something to you, because I thought you'd only ever kiss Kikyo! But if you don't want my help, that's fine!"
Her words stung. "Kagome..." What is the matter with her? I've hardly seen her get so...
Two more tears managed to get past her barriers--and she wanted to get away before the leaks made her dam break completely. "Go with her, then! Go live with the inu-youkai and be somebody! Get out of this silly village! You don't need me!"
Inuyasha swallowed, tried to speak--but couldn't. Kagome's eyes were letting tears flow freely now, and she couldn't say anything either. So she pushed past him and headed for the door, dashing her tears away with one hand--desperately wanting to get far, far away before she broke down completely in front of him.
"Kagome--wait--!" Why the hell is she so upset? What does Ginnezu trying to kiss me have to do with anything?
"Leave me alone!" she hissed, not stopping. "Osuwari!"
"Whoof!" Inuyasha let out a loud snarl at the crushing, invisible weight, uncharacteristically vicious for the situation. "K'so--Kagome--!"
But she was gone, out the door, her footsteps rapidly pattering around the hut. There was the metallic sound of her bicycle scraping as she hit the kickstand and mounted it, then the noise of the tires crunching over grass and pebbles as she rode away.
Ginnezu, who hadn't budged from her perch on the roof, giggled furiously at the fleeing girl's back, desperately muffling the sounds in her hands--it would do her no good if Inuyasha heard and thought she was making light of the situation. In fact, she thought, it would do her no good if Inuyasha considered her involved at all; he was already a bit upset at her. Still snickering, the Silver inu-youkai bounded off the roof and in the opposite direction, disappearing into the sunset and shadows.
Inuyasha, finally able to drag himself back to at least four feet, shot out the door and made a hard ninety-degree turn toward the forest, scrabbling frantically for purchase on the dusty earth. He poured on the speed, galloping after Kagome and her bicycle.
Part of him was angry--furious, really, for being sat for no reason he could see--and part of him was desperate to catch up to her before she went through the well.
Another part of him was...something he couldn't put name to, couldn't figure out--so he put it aside and simply went with the angry and desperate parts.
There! He already heard her bike ahead, clattering down the half-beaten path. "Kagome!"
"Go away!" she cried over her shoulder. "Stay there!"
"Kagome, stop!" He left the winding trail, ducking into the underbrush and taking a shortcut through the scrub to try and cut her off before she reached the well.
"Go away! Now!" There was a tone to her voice...
Oh, shit--she's gonna--!
"Osuwari!"
"Aaagh--huff!"
The sit came as he was leaping a length of fallen tree. He slammed down on it hard, the wood catching him in the solar plexus and knocking the wind out of him, sending a shooting burst of agony through his belly. "Ughhhhh..."
While the magic pressed down on him, all he could do was claw weakly at the wood and moan as pain shot through his midsection in time with each pulse of his heart. He hurt so much he couldn't draw breath, and as the force crushed him down on the log his involuntary groans cost him the last of his air.
He was beginning to gag for oxygen when the spell finally relented. He rolled off the log, receiving a new spasm of agony, and lay flat on the ground, panting in pain and coughing feebly for air.
"...Stupid...wench..." He couldn't move; his whole body ached now, as if he'd been smashed by some massive oni. He wondered if the fall had broken any ribs; he certainly felt like it had. He twitched, tried to get up, but his entire midsection was practically paralyzed from the harsh bruising and his diaphragm could only barely support the mechanics of breathing just now.
Maybe getting up wasn't such a good idea. "Ugh...damn...that girl..."
Kagome! The thought of her focused his will; unwilling to lie about, he gritted his teeth and forced his muscles to move. Halfway up he gasped and flinched--fire shot through his insides and he realized he'd somehow been injured more seriously than he'd first realized. Blood seeped from a deep wound in his side, soaking his kimono. "Aw...k'so...where'd this come from...?"
His eyes caught a dark stain on the log above him. The stub of a broken-off branch had stabbed him when he'd been crushed to the log, with such force that it had pierced the fire-rat material and probably broken off pieces of the branch inside him. It was what elicited the throbs of agony he'd felt and the slice of pain when he'd torn himself off of it.
"Damn that girl...I could've been killed...!" His eyes were wide at the thought that Kagome might potentially have the power to end his life with but a word.
"Wouldn't that be a shame...Inuyasha?"
The hanyou flinched visibly.
It was a familiar voice--deathly familiar. It was one that haunted his fairest dreams and his darkest nightmares--haunting, pleading, accusing, but calm, always calm; dangerous and quiet. It was a voice that given a thousand years he'd never, ever forget--not in a million lifetimes.
"Kikyo..." He looked up with cautious golden eyes, drawing back from the resurrected miko's approach.
The dark-haired woman favored him with a calm, wan smile. It was a smile he would have loved to see on her face--years ago, when it would have meant she was happy. Now...he didn't know what it meant.
"What do you want?" he asked gruffly, guardedly.
"Inuyasha, I've seen the troubles you've been having," Kikyo said softly, sitting down beside him. Her strange little insectoid, fishlike spirit-pets wove glowing patterns in the air around them. "The lady inu-youkai, the little would-be miko, your mocking old friend..."
"What of it?" Inuyasha felt supremely uncomfortable at her presence--a fact he still found strange, but familiar by now--but refused to shrink away from her.
"I would free you of these troubles," Kikyo offered, her tone never wavering. Come to think of it, her voice never changed. Not in all the years--and emotions--he'd known her. It would grow louder and more intense when she was angered, but never, ever, did it lose that same calm, unswerving tone that underlay her every word.
Not like Kagome, whose voice would change to suit her moods, becoming bright when she was happy and thunderous when she was angry and even snapping like a whip when she sat him...
"And how would you do that?" he asked, trying to muster the force to growl or be derisive, but couldn't find the breath for it. "Drag me to Hell like you've promised?"
"Inuyasha, my love, is that all you think of me?" Kikyo leaned close, her breath tickling his cheek--and smelling of sod and death. He shuddered involuntarily.
"You keep trying to kill me, so I guess that is what I think." He tried to keep her talking, to buy time for his body to gather the strength he needed for fight or flight. In his condition, he seriously believed it would be the latter.
"Silly hanyou." Kikyo laughed softly. "My love, after all our promises to be together, do you believe that is all that I had planned for you and I? What of our 'happily ever after?'"
"Well, Naraku kinda screwed that up, so..." Inuyasha shrugged painfully, trying to mask old grief with nonchalance. "There's not a lot I can do."
"Come with me." Her eyes held his gaze.
"Come...where?" He stared back at her, finding himself focusing not on what she was saying, but on the color of her eyes. Kikyo's eyes were gray like a lake on a cloudy day, echoing her depth and the unknown stirrings beneath the surface.
But Kagome's eyes were crystal blue, bright like the sky when the sun shines clear, windows to a soul where every emotion was as visible as the clouds that passed overhead....
And staring possible death in the face, he'd never been so aware of the difference.
"To the beyond, my love," Kikyo answered him. "To the place we both belong. We were two lives cut short in our prime, in the middle of our love. We both died that day fifty years ago, not just I--and now we are simply two ghosts who walk the earth in torment, unable to be together because of Naraku's wretched curse. But...my love, if we were to go beyond, to a place where he cannot reach us..."
"We would be free," Inuyasha finished. He was tempted--like always, Kikyo's soft voice tempted him, lulled his defenses, made him think that maybe...maybe her words rang with truth. It was almost like a spell.
"And our souls would become one," Kikyo concluded. "Oh, my love, I knew you'd understand..."
She was embracing him now. Her scent was like the dirt from a grave--moist and cold, full of death. Even her touch was icy, her hands like cool stones. The cold seeped into his bones, stealing away what little strength he'd gathered, rendering him helpless.
Then he heard Kagome gasp for the second time that evening.
Kikyo's head cranked around, and her normally calm mask twisted into an annoyed frown. "Go away, child. You are not wanted here."
"I-Inuyasha...!" Kagome, standing in the dim, silvery light of the just-risen sliver of moon, clutched her hands to her chest at the sight of the blood on the hanyou's kimono. "Kikyo! What have you done to him?"
"I did nothing," Kikyo replied flatly, coldly. "You did it with your subduing spell. Can't you see you're the one who's hurt him?"
Kagome flinched, and seeing the smear of blood on the log Inuyasha was leaned against, her eyes sprang anew with tears. "Oh...! Oh, Inuyasha--I'm so sorry! I didn't know!"
At the sight of her sorrow, Inuyasha tried to tell her he didn't care, it was just an accident and he'd had worse--but he lacked the breath to do it. Kikyo's icy grip kept his muscles from mustering enough strength to do any more than lie there and breathe.
And soon, perhaps, not even that.
"Ah--" Kagome, seeing his helpless state, began to advance on them. "Let him go, Kikyo!"
"He is coming with me," the undead miko warned. "Do not interfere."
"No he's not!" Kagome began to run at them, determined to do something--anything--to save Inuyasha's life.
Kikyo's face shifted from annoyed to angry. She released Inuyasha to turn and face the girl, but when the hanyou began to struggle she grabbed him with both hands--one on the shoulder and one just above his wound--and poured out her power on him. Her miko energy seared his youkai flesh, and he let out an agonized cry and fell back. When he was incapacitated, she stood to face Kagome.
"You can't take him away!" Kagome shouted, and attempted to throw herself at the undead miko.
A flaring burst of power deflected the schoolgirl's rush, knocking her to the ground and singeing her clothing. "I've told you--do not interfere," Kikyo said in that same even voice--though hardened in warning. "If you persist, I'll strip you of the little piece of my soul I allowed you to live on, and take what is mine with us to the afterlife! I had intended to let you live your own life with the part of my soul you hold now--the part that lived your life--but if you will not stay out of my way, I will reclaim it!"
"No..." Kagome shuddered and drew back, frightened. Neither Inuyasha nor Kaede-baachan would tell her exactly what had happened the day Kikyo was ressurrected, so for all she knew, the miko was telling the truth. She knew Kikyo's knowledge and powers were greater than her own; she didn't even really know how to use her borrowed abilities. "Please...don't take him!"
At the sound of her desperate plea, Kikyo's face softened just a tiny bit. So, the little kitten is in love with the hanyou as well, eh? It stands to reason; two halves of the same whole will seek out their soul-mate. But her verbal answer was simple, concise. "I was here first," the undead miko stated.
All Inuyasha could manage was a pained gasp. Dammit, Kikyo, leave her alone! If you want me, take me--but don't hurt her! She's not supposed to be involved in this!
Kagome gamely pushed to her feet, wiping her eyes and bracing herself against the fear. "No...no! I won't let you! I don't know how to use any of these powers, but I'll stop you! I'll find a way!"
Kikyo's face returned to the impassive mask it had been. "Very well."
With a gesture, the long, flying insect-things that were her shikigami swooped in, surrounding them. A group of them wrapped themselves around Inuyasha--who was just beginning to recover--pinning him to the log, knotting their own bodies to it to restrain him.
Another group whipped at Kagome with startling speed compared to their usual leisurely drift. Coiling around her as well, they forced her to another tree, tying her there like a victim about to be burned at the stake.
Her face still impassive, Kikyo came closer to Kagome, looking down into the shorter girl's frightened, angry features. "Such a pity," she said softly. "You were such a good girl, Kagome. I thought certainly you could make do with the ookami-youkai, Kouga, or perhaps even that priest with the...roving hands."
Inuyasha snarled faintly at that, but though he struggled feebly he could not free himself from his bonds. The after-effects of the fall and Kikyo's magic still held him down along with the shikigami-creatures.
"I suppose you could not live without him," Kikyo continued in a low whisper that she thought Inuyasha might not hear, actually smiling a little. "In that case, reclaiming your soul-piece into mine would be a mercy. We would be one again, and we would never be separated from him." She regarded Kagome pityingly. "You would waste away into nothing without him, wouldn't you? I couldn't live nor die without him, either--and you are me, after all."
"That's not true," Kagome managed, tears flowing down her cheeks. "I'm not you! I'm nobody's reincarnation! I'm me, Higurashi Kagome!"
"Believe what you like. It makes no difference to me." Kikyo stepped back.
"You can't take hi--urk!"
One of the glowing creatures that bound her tightened about her throat, cutting off her words with her air.
Still trapped, lying against the log, Inuyasha let out a growl and began to struggle more. "Kikyo, let her go! Come take me--leave her alone!"
Kikyo took another few steps away from Kagome, a strange, sad-angry light in her eyes. "My love, this will take but a moment. I can reclaim the lost part of my soul, and with it the rest of my power. Then you and I need never be parted."
"You'll kill her!" Inuyasha cried, his voice so shocked it lost every trace of a growl.
Kikyo glanced at him, her expression still unchanged. "I know."
Kagome made a small gurgling noise, her pleading blue eyes turned to Inuyasha as her last hope of survival. Her face was stricken, ashen gray.
"Kikyo!" Inuyasha yelled. "Release her! Release her and I'll go with you! I won't fight--just let her go! Let her live!"
The resurrected miko simply ignored him, turning away as if offended by his overwhelming concern for the girl.
A rumble built deep in the inu-hanyou's chest--a low, dangerous growl that grew in volume and intensity as his muscles tensed and his body forced itself to gather strength in response to Kagome's plight. Angry now, and well on his way to enraged, Inuyasha strained against the glowing creatures that held him, stretching their gossammer essences with a power born of desperation.
Kagome's face was pale, her lips blue. Her body was limp, and her eyes began to roll back in her head.
She's dying!
When Kagome's struggles faded into stillness, Inuyasha's deep growl turned into a full-fledged snarling roar as he tore free of the glowing insectoid creatures and sprang, blind with rage. Kikyo sensed him coming a half-moment too late to fully protect herself.
His claws ripped into her back, tearing her artificial flesh, spilling her blackish blood and throwing her to the ground. In her shock, her control slipped, and the creatures loosened their holds--but not before Inuyasha slashed them asunder and caught Kagome as she slid bonelessly from the tree. With a gentleness that belied his vicious attack, he held her limp body close to him as she feebly choked for air.
Gasping in surprise, agony, and anger, Kikyo crawled to her feet and stumbled back. "Inuyasha...?" she croaked, her voice thick with pain and betrayal. This time, his talons truly had scored her--not just some shapechanged shadow imitation.
His face was tight with pain as well--agony that things had come to this--as he cradled Kagome where he knelt on the ground, torn between self-loathing and quiet fury. His eyes were fierce and golden but tempered with a wet gleam that Kikyo had never seen there before. Could it be...tears?
"Kikyo...what have you become?" he asked, his rough voice both soft and harsh at the same time. "Have you become so drunk on revenge that you would kill even an innocent girl to reach me?"
"Inuyasha..." Kikyo saw something different in his eyes now; something that flickered to even greater life when he glanced at the unconscious girl in his arms. Something that had been there since she'd first arrived--even since she had been resurrected--yet she had not deigned to notice.
Somehow...she was losing him. This girl...this child...had stolen him away from her.
Her gray eyes hardened with renewed anger. "We will meet again."
Inuyasha said nothing--but his eyes still said enough.
Kikyo made a gesture of command, and her remaining undamaged spirit-thieves clustered around her and lifted her into the air, bearing her away into the dark night sky.
When she was gone, far out of sight, Inuyasha allowed the moisture in his eyes to spill over. A single tear traced a path down his cheek--a single tear, and no more.
"Kikyo..."
She was crying when she awoke.
Her throat was dry and it ached when she swallowed between sobs, but her body felt heavy and sluggish. Tears poured from her eyes as she cried, not trying to hide them at all, her heart's pain flowing freely down her face.
Her horrid experience and the nightmares that followed haunted her mind, making her unsure what was real and what was a dream. Vaguely, she realized she was in her own bed, in her own room, in her own time. The room was dark, the window open and the curtains fluttering slightly in the breeze. But was this a dream as well?
A dark shape sat on the bed near her, staying with her even through her sobs. A tender hand stroked her bangs slowly, soothingly, now and then trailing down her cheek to brush away tears. The presence she felt tingled warmly in her perceptions, unfamiliar yet well-known all the same.
"Shhh...easy...I'm here..." spoke a soft, whispered voice. She could not identify it--it was male, rough, familiar...and so gentle...but she could not place it. "She's gone...you're alive...everything's okay...shhh...I'm here..."
Her crying abated a little as she began to relax, her sobs becoming hiccups. Gradually, her tears turned from rivers to raindrops, and she began to settle into drowsiness. The gentle voice continued to whisper reassurances, until her eyes closed and her mind rested easy at last.