Spiderman is dead: the story afterwards pt. IV

I feel irrational, so confrontational

To tell the truth I am getting away with murder

It is impossible to never tell the truth

But the reality is I'm getting away with murder

I slept in an empty alleyway for the rest of the night, because a cop saw my tentacles take me outside, and they dared not to hide back there.

But when I woke up, the news of Peter Parker being dead was spread everywhere, like a disease.

It was everywhere, by newspaper, TV, radio, and even people gossiped to those that were living under a rock. They would say that Peter wasn't really Spiderman, and that he was still alive out there, just somewhere else. They couldn't accept the fact that Spiderman is finally dead. But it was inevitable. It was my fault.

But the whole noisy street of New York was quiet, because they know the very being that was their protector is no longer there, to protect them when they needed that protection.

And it was all in the fault of me, because I have killed their protector, and now everyone moans for him.

Even the same idiot that kept throwing words at Spiderman of how he is a menace moans for him. They offered a moment of silence in every hour, and they would talk non-stop of how he has saved the lives of millions of people, and how that Spiderman is really Peter Parker.

"I was really surprised to see that Spiderman has died," Jonah Jameson said on the TV. "But what really pushed me was that it was the same photographer that was behind the mask. And Parker was such a good kid, I sure wished that all those words were taken back."

Well, happy now? He's gone, just as you wanted, I thought, standing in front of a TV shop. I wore a different colored trenchcoat, black. No one recognized me. They were too busy with their lives or just talking about Spiderman.

And now, I'm just too busy, wondering what would happen if he didn't die. What would happen if I had stayed dead? Peter would've been out, saving more than he has by now. But people are hurting, because it was my fault, and I killed the one they needed. I was an idiot.

I was an idiot to let the arms control me.

I was an idiot to not be strong enough to stay sane. But everything was a blur, they told me their opinions, and I believed them. I was an idiot to recreate the machine. I was an idiot to say that it'll stabilize, when I knew something was wrong. I was an idiot to not listen to Peter when he warned me that I would blow up the city.

I was an idiot to listen to the arms, when it was clear that it wasn't Peter's fault the begin with. I am so selfish.

The tentacles asked me why I became a cutter last night, and I explained them everything. They felt clear of my feelings even if they were machines, not capable to feel.

But why father? They caused you so much pain, they don't deserve to live.

That's wrong. There are millions of innocents people out there who are just scared, and the only thing that is to blame about my pain is myself. I did this to myself, and there's no denying.

I hurt myself. I hurt everyone, especially Peter. I cut myself, I drowned myself, I mentally beat myself up, and among every other things.

I'm a selfish sinner, not caring for anyone but myself. I have hurt, I have killed, and I have murdered and got away with it.

They're holding a huge funeral at the end of this week. I'm going to attend it for Peter, and beg him for forgiveness, and I would pay my respects. He was such an innocent boy, just a friendly-neighbor who wanted to help out. That's all. It shouldn't make a huge conflict about helping out, but it did. It killed him. I killed him. And I'm to blame.

I'm going to attend Peter's funeral.

Damn. I just posted the last chappie without viewing my reviews and the chapter before that...what kind of fanfic writer am I? Oh well...everyone makes mistakes...

About the link...well...cursed thing won't allow links! Okay, just look in my home page. That should do it!

Responses:

Moonjava: Hmm...someone else said that in my other fic (Doc Ock suite) Creepy...but thanks for the complement!

sdafsadf: ...I don't trust you to be Mary Jane. lol okay, maybe I do. (and about the slash thing, how could you love a dead guy? Anyways, Otto's heart will belong to Rosie's and always will be. But I must admit, I did kinda made it slashy. I won't do it again.)

LordLanceahlot: ...'never judge a book by its cover' I always say. Don't worry,you're going to find that Pete will play good role for Otto's future-- like a particular someone who introduced 'with great power comes great responsibility'...

Anonymous-cat: Because I was lazy. No, actually, I couldn't think of a better title, and then I spotted my bible and muttered "hmm..." And maybe because I'm lazy.

Everyone else: 16 reviews for2 chapters! I have never thought that could be possible! I think I need to make more Otto-Peter (not slash!) fics with them at the same rate often!

Oh yeah, and I force Otto to make that Santa belly laugh!

Otto: Ho ho ho. you're such a hoe.

Me: (jumps into lap) Sure. Now gimme a Game boy XP!

see ya.