Hey all. Here's chapter four, as a New Year's present. Hope you all got Twilight and enjoyed it! I know I did. Anyway, please, read and review the chapter, and I hope I can get another one up soon.

Chapter Four

Jesse's point of view

My girlfriend, Kelly, and I were in my car, at the point, watching the sun set. Her fingers were intertwined with mine, and both of us were breathing heavily from what we had just been doing. I knew that this was a pretty romantic situation, and my thoughts should have been on Kelly, but they weren't—they were on Suze. I felt like there was something about her that I needed to know, that there was more than what meets the eye. I just couldn't stop thinking about her.

"Hey, Kel… you know Suze?" I suddenly blurted out. Kelly looked at me funny.

"Suze Simon? That freak? Yeah…why?"

"Uh… no reason. She just always seems to… not be here," I said, inadequately describing her odd behavior.

"Yea, well, she's been like this for about a month. I don't know why. But she's always been weird. I think she's, like, crazy. I mean, at a party a few months ago, she kept talking to someone who wasn't there. It was totally strange. Same thing with Paul. They kept talking to someone named 'Jess' or something, and Paul kept beating himself up. Then all of a sudden she just keeled over. We all thought she died. Maybe she was on drugs." Suddenly, the sunset and Kelly's face faded out…

I saw Paul, with my hands- glowing- around his neck. I was filled with a white hot anger and jealousy, and all I knew was that I needed to make him pay… make him pay for kissing Susannah. Then I saw her, out of the corner of my eye. She was talking to me, but I wasn't playing attention. My hands shoved Paul's head under water, I think it was a hot tub. Dozens of people were around us, staring at Paul and Suze with frightened expressions. Then I felt something hit my shoulder, and knock me off balance. I turned to look—how could anyone touch me?—and my heart froze in fear, when I saw my beloved Susannah, lying unconscious on the ground. I immediately dropped Paul, and rushed to her side. "Susannah! Susannah, wake up!"…

The sunset and Kelly returned, as I pressed myself against my seat, breathing heavily. What was that? Something was definitely going on. I recognized it as the scene that Kelly had just described, but who was I? Kelly said Paul had been beating himself up… but just then, I was clearly the one who was beating him up, not himself. "Jesse?" Kelly asked. "What's up?"

"Uh… nothing. Sorry… just zoned out there for a second, I guess." Was I going crazy? I needed to talk to someone about this… someone who might know what was happening to me. "Listen, Kelly, I just remembered, I have to get home. I have to, um, do my homework." She pouted, and wrapped her arms around my neck and pushed herself up against me.

"Ooo," she cooed, "how about you stay here for just a few more minutes?" She took my hand and put it on her leg, and then trailed one finger down my neck, across my chest, and down my stomach. "Okay?" My throat got tight, and I wanted out of the situation, quickly. We had done this before, but… I felt weird doing it now. I felt like I was betraying someone, though who, I don't know.

"Uh, sorry, but I really have to get home. I'll drop you off on the way." I pulled away from her and started the ignition. She glowered at me, and sat back in her seat, crossing her arms over her chest, obviously mad. We drove in silence, my head spinning too much to make conversation. After I dropped her off, I drove to the only person's house that I think might have answers.

I pulled onto Pine Crest Drive at a little before seven thirty. Without even thinking, I went up and knocked on the door. A young red headed kid came to the door, and his eyes widened when he saw me. I saw through the house the corner of their dining room table, where a woman—Suze's mom, I suppose—and Brad, her step brother, sat. "Uh… sorry. Am I interrupting dinner?" I asked nervously.

"No, we just finished up. Can I help you?"

"Can I talk to Suze?" I asked, and he nodded. He opened the door some more, and let me in.

"She's in the kitchen," he said, and led me there. I saw her, rinsing plates and stacking them in the dishwasher. I sat there for about ten seconds, watching her, before I cleared my throat.

"Suze?" She jumped, and turned around quickly. Her eyes widened, and she almost looked frightened at the sight of me. Maybe this was a bad idea. "Sorry… maybe this is a bad time," I mumbled.

"No, no… it's okay." She wiped her hands on a dishtowel, and cleared her throat. "Let's go out to the deck." I followed her through the dining room and out to the deck, where she flipped a switch and light flooded over a hot tub—the hot tub from my vision—and a few deck chairs and a table. Suze sat down at the table, and I sat across from her. "I don't mean to be rude, but Jesse… what are you doing here?" I sighed, and ran my hands through my hair.

"I was wondering if you could tell me what happened at the one party here… when you passed out." She looked shocked and confused.

"How… how do you know about that?" she asked.

"Er… Kelly mentioned it," I admitted. "But listen. It's important. You know about my amnesia, right? Well, my doctor said that I might start getting flashbacks, and, well, I think I was involved with the party. Was I?" She avoided my gaze.

"Um… sort of…" she said vaguely.

"So did you know me, Suze? Back before I got amnesia?" I asked, excited. I didn't even think about the fact that I had been glowing and invisible in my visions. She didn't respond. "Suze?"

"Susannah," she whispered, staring out into the back yard. "You used to call me Susannah." She paused, and I watched her silently. "But that's in the past. You're with Kelly now." Her voice dropped to near silence, but I still heard her. "And not me." Suddenly, she stood up, acting like she hadn't just said anything. "Yes, we did know each other. But Paul ruined that," she said, almost matter-of-factly.

"Paul? What does he have to do with this?" I asked, confused. Going to Susannah answered some questions, but produced many more.

"Ask him," she said scathingly. "I'm sure he knows much more about it than me." She walked away from me, and back into the house. I followed her, and saw her going up the stairs. I hurried to catch up with her.

"Wait. Suze—Susannah," I tried. Susannah. That seemed so much more natural, more comfortable, more familiar. She froze, with her hand on the knob to a door—presumably her room. "I have one more question. Were we… were we together?" My voice dropped, and I watched her grip the doorknob until her knuckles turned white.

"Yes," she whispered. "We were." She opened the door, and through the crack bound a cat, an incredibly ugly cat, but endearing all the same. It leapt onto the post at the top of the banister, where my hand was, and nuzzled my arm, purring. "Spike!" she said sharply, and scooped him up, sustaining a scratch across her arm, and she swore softly.

"Are you okay?" I asked. She tossed the cat back into her room, and shut the door. She examined her scratch, which was bleeding slightly.

"Fine. Nothing out of the ordinary," she said. I examined it closely, then pulled out a handkerchief from my pocked, and dabbed at the cut gently, and it stopped bleeding.

"Better?" I asked softly, but when I looked up, her eyes were shining and full of tears.

"I'm fine. Just… please go. I have stuff to do." Surprised, I dropped her arm, and she went into her bedroom and slammed the door.

Alright, it's time for your reviews! I'll try to get another chapter up soon, but I'm not sure when. Anyway, Happy New Years! I wish you all good luck and happiness in '05.

-Jane (Qui Tacet Consentit)

ps—thanks to Clavel and soin2jesse for some help with this chapter.