Disclaimer: As usual Albus, Minerva and their wonderful world belongs to JKR.
A/N: Thank-you to all who reviewed and even to those who read but didn't review (You know who you are!)
Minerva'sQuill: Glad you liked it. As they say the course of true love never runs smoothly.
Catwoman99: Prehaps. But I can't say anymore or I'll give the rest away.
Minni: Albus is being Albus or as much in character as possible. Sorry this update wasn't as speedy as planned.
tabby forever: You'll have to wait and read the next couple of chapters. I'm glad I made you
think.
Angledust aka Evilwoman: Original or different is my middle name.
Minne Dumbledore: I'm afraid you'll have to read on to find out. One thing I will say though never assume.
Ok now on with the show. Morgana-Alex.
Risking My Sisters Wrath or What Have I Done?
Chapter 4:
This morning is hardly dissimilar from the few other thousand's of my life so far. In so much as I am alone. The small, yet glaring detail that makes it different is that I was not on my own when I went to sleep. I fell asleep in Albus's warm, strong, comforting arms. Thought I must add that I was not surprised by his absence.
Albus and I had decided it wise that we part early, so we would be found in our own rooms should anyone come searching for us. After the close call we had had when Katarina decided one morning to pay an unscheduled visit to her husband, it was also safer.
It was four months after we had embarked on our affair and the summer holidays were fast approaching. I despaired of this holiday. For Albus would be expected to spend the time with his wife in their home and I would be expected in his absence to look after Hogwarts.
Katarina was now five months pregnant and was proudly displaying a sizeable bump. She has also started to turn up at Hogwarts any time she pleased, much to my annoyance and Albus's chagrin. It meant that we could spend less and less time together. I know I must sound like a heartless woman stealing my pregnant sister's husband. Perhaps stealing is the wrong word. He went back to her when he left me, did he not?
I was starting to get cold feet. How could we continue as we had? Especially after the baby was born? Neither of us was getting any younger and creeping about like students out after curfew was taking its toll.
It occurred to me that we had not discussed the issue of how Katarina had become pregnant. Albus had to my knowledge never lied to me, so when he had told me days before his revelation that he had not "Been with" his wife in almost a year, I believed every word. So how could this baby be his? I was known for being direct, blunt at times, so why was I shying away from the question that was haunting my dreams?
I resolved to ask him the next time we were alone. Which as fortune would have it, was that evening over a game of chess.
I was so preoccupied that I was losing quite spectacularly. Albus looked over at me, as if he were trying to decide what was wrong.
"Minerva my dear, you seem somewhat distracted this evening. May I inquire as to the reason?" He smiled a smile full of concern.
"On Albus I'm not sure I should tell you." He regarded me now as if he were trying to use legilimcy on me.
"Minerva there is nothing you could say to me that I would not understand. Even if I did not like it, I love you too much to think badly of you for it."
"Albus for the last few days the thought of Katarina's child has been playing on my mind. I remember you telling me that you had not "been with" her for sometime." I paused to phrase the next part.
"Albus I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't understand how the child could be yours. I know she is your wife and I really do not expect you to not…well you know. But…" I had gone bright red at this point. Truth be told the idea had caused me pain and I needed to know one way or the other.
Albus had now moved so he was kneeling in front of me, holding my hands in his.
"My dear, sweet, beautiful Minerva do you really think that of me." It wasn't a question really "I did not lie to you when I told you I had not indulged in that kind of activity with my wife for sometime. If I'm honest your question occurred to me as well and the only answer I have is that it must have been the night of Aberforth's Birthday, the dates fit. The last thing I remember about that night is passing out in my study-fully clothed- after you had dragged me in there to sober me up. However the next morning I woke up in Katarina's bed without a stitch of clothing and her beside me. I do not remember how I got there, how I lost my clothes and now how I got Katarina pregnant. The logical thing to assume would be that I regained consciousness in the study and accosted my wife."
I was at that moment making mental notes to find a spell that would prevent Albus imbibing alcohol ever again, if that is what he did when drunk.
"Minerva you will note that I have not touched a drop of alcohol since that night and I promise you that I do not intend to ever again." How did he do that? Then his expression changed.
"Minerva please believe me when I say that you are the only woman I have ever truly loved and now that I have you I will not be doing anything that may cause me to lose you or intentionally hurt you." Tears had welled up in my eyes. He reached up to caress my cheek.
"Albus I know I am clutching at straws here. But given my sisters chequered past, isn't it possible that the logical assumption is not the correct one. Given that you remember nothing. You must ask if it happened at all. Albus you had had enough firewhisky that night to knock out every beater in Scotland. Not for one moment do I think that you were capable of climbing the stairs, let alone what you're suggesting." That's my Minerva, Albus thought. Always believing the best in me. But she must also realise I am just a man underneath it all; I am flesh and blood and therefore susceptible to the most base of desire. I may not have been in love with Katarina. But I did marry her, I allowed us to be bound together for life, I must have had my reasons.
I left Albus's rooms around 2 o'clock in the morning. I changed in to my other self and hoped to enjoy a leisurely stretch back to my rooms. However as soon as I got a few yards from the spiral staircase I became aware of another presence in the corridor. A presence I could not see. Yet I knew someone or something was there. I hid in the shadow of a suit of armour hoping against hope that I would not be seen. Then my eyes fell upon it a black spider walking toward the headmaster's office, when it got there I was not surprised to see it turn in to Katarina McGonagall-Dumbledore. My mind raced as I heard her speak the password and ascend the stairs. How long had she been there? Did she see me leave? Was Albus now in danger because I had not checked the passageway was empty before I had entered it?
I could do nothing now that would not arouse suspicion. So I did the only thing I could, I went back to my rooms and hoped for the best…
A few hours later I was somewhat relieved to watch Albus cross the grounds to the lake. What bothered me were his shoulders they were hunched and seemed to be carrying the weight of the world. I wanted to run to his side, embrace him, and remind him that he wasn't alone, that no matter what happened I would always be here for him.
But I could not. After Katarina's arrival this morning and the subsequent announcement that she would be spending the weekend, meant the deputy headmistress had to keep a respectful distance. So I kept to my rooms, leaving only once in the early hours of Sunday morning to admonish my lions for making too much noise.
Here I am in a castle with hundreds of other souls and yet I have never felt so alone. I remind myself that I chose the path I am now following, when I gave up fighting my heart.
Why does wishing away a day make it seem longer? Saturday and Sunday blended into one, I was extremely grateful to awaken and discover it was Monday morning.
I set about my usual morning routine and was soon on my way to the great hall for breakfast. I even had a little bounce in my step, as I knew that this early I would only have one companion at the table.
As I pushed open the heavy oak doors I wished I had not gotten out of bed. For seated at the high table were two people, the first was the person I had been expecting, and the second should have left last night or at the very least had the decency to breakfast in bed. Albus sat with Katarina who was sitting in my seat no less. I wanted to run, to hide. But I knew they had seen me, I had no choice but to continue on my current course.
As I walked between the Griffindor and Ravenclaw tables I kept my eyes on the ground. I had no desire to witness the scene being played out in front of me.
"Good Morning Albus, Katarina," I said as I took the seat on Albus's left, I would have finished eating before its usual occupant could object to my presence. Katarina tried her best to monopolise Albus in conversation. But Albus was having none of it. He sought to include me in any way he could, much to Katarina's Chagrin and my delight.
I finished eating just as Severus Snape came into the hall from the door behind me; I nodded to him. Severus had never been a person to appreciate conversation before he has had at least three cups of coffee. I rose and nodded to Albus and Katarina, taking my leave through the door which Severus had used to enter the hall.
My heart fell as I walked to my classroom. I felt sad, used and so incredibly guilty. It was true that there was no love loss between my sister and myself. But that did not give me the right to do what I was doing.
As I walked to lunch Severus greeted me.
"Unless you want a repeat of breakfast I wouldn't go to the great hall if I were you." He continued to walk back to the dungeons. He hadn't explained the meaning of his suggestion. He didn't need to. He had told me in more words than were perhaps necessary, that Katarina was still in the castle.
I turned around and found my way back to my office. I had no aspiration to duplicate the farce that was the first meal of the day.
Just as I had seated myself behind my desk a house elf appeared with a tray of food and a goblet of Pumpkin juice. Once the elf had set the tray on my desk it promptly disappeared.
Albus had done this there was a little note under the goblet. It read simply "I'm sorry." He had not signed it for that would have been unnecessary and risky. I allowed myself a small smile before tucking in.
A knock came at my door; I had hoped it was Albus telling me that his wife had left. But as the door opened it revealed the woman herself.
"My dear sister, how are you?" It was a question that had insincerity dripping from every word, Katarina grinned as she said it and closed the door.
A/N: I hope this chapter explains a few tings as well as make you look forward to reading the next. Thanks for reading now please, please REVIEW. Morgana-Alex.