Disclaimer and general ranting:
Tala: First and foremost, we humbly beg everyone's pardon for not posting . . . . . . and will happily provide excuses if so desired.
Cayla: Damn right you will beg them for forgiveness!!! It's been forever!!!
Nerina: (glares) Cayla is our beta . . . . . . and she is a not very nice task master. . . . . .
Tala: What do you mean not very nice?! She's damn persistent and scary (whispers) she is the local kung fu master . . . . . . so she can be real scary . . . . . .
Cayla: Excuse me!! Get on with it!!
Nerina: Alright, alright, sheesh . . . . . . (adopts monotone) We, the party of the first part, the authors, do not own anything that is copyrighted by the party of the second part, the Tolkein foundation or whatever, so don't sue! (aside) and I'm workin on the getting Gandalf drunk part(wink)
Tala: Yeah, we're poor anyways so it would be a waster of time . . . . . .
Cayla: Yeah yeah, shut up and on with the chapter!
Tala slowly awoke to the sound of a bird. At any other time, she would have thought the bird's song quite beautiful, but not in the morning when she was in the middle of a very fun dream, about . . . . . . gorgeous blue eyes and a warrior's body. She quickly sat up and shoved the memory of the dream away. 'Bad thoughts, bad thoughts. But then again, his body is absolutely hott! I mean-AHH!! Stop! What am I thinking?' covering her face with her hands she sighed, and completely pissed at the bird and herself, yelled, "SHUT UP!" to no one in particular.
The bird, being exceedingly smart, flew away, and Tala felt much better. She flopped back down onto her pillows, but after a few minutes she finally huffed something that sounded suspiciously like 'shit' and got out of bed.
She shuffled over to the bathroom, and after finishing in there, went and rummaged in the closet and dresser. She pulled out black pants and a dark green shirt and then tied her hair back in her customary braid. Taking a last glance in the mirror, she nodded and slowly made her way over to Nerina's room.
"Hey, 'Rina. You awake-" her voice drifted into nothing when she noticed that Nerina's room was empty. "Great, she's abandoned me already. O well, maybe I can detain a nice footman and get breakfast."
She stepped out of the rooms, and for once finding no one about, she made her way down the halls, searching for food and Nerina. She picked up the sounds of clanging as she passed a passageway, and now following her ears and nose, came to a huge kitchen. It was IMMENSE.
Herbs hung from the ceiling, and large windows flooded it with light. The smell of bread and spices gave the room a comfortable feeling. At this point, there were only two people in there, two Elven women. They turned as she stepped in, and immediately one grabbed a plate and a few food items while the other grabbed her arm and led her to a small table in a corner. She was quite surprised, but didn't complain as the two 'forced' her to eat a variety of breakfast pastries after pushing her onto a stool on a bar like counter. They chatted as they went back to work, introducing themselves as Larissa and Vanida.
"You must try this," urged Vanida, giving Tala a sample of some sort of fruit concoction. She drank, and found a very pleasing blend of fruits and a sweetness she couldn't quite place. She nodded as she drank in response to the "Is it good?" question.
Larissa snickered at the blissful expression on Tala's face after she put the cup down, and then asked, "Do you cook, my lady?"
"Tala, please. And yes, it is tons of fun. And do you all have any chocolate somewhere? It's been days and I'm suffering withdrawal." At their confused looks, she just sighed and said dejectedly, "Guess not."
But they didn't let the subject go, and started to questioning her about it. They had just reached the myths and legends of chocolate, mainly its aphrodisiac qualities, when Prince boy decided to walk in. He gave them strange looks, having only caught part of the conversation, and gave them a weak smile when they burst into laughter.
"Hiya, Blondie. Have you seen Nerina?" Tala asked with a little wave.
Legolas ignored the name, and shook his head. "No, I was actually coming to find Gandalf. I haven't seen him this morning either."
Tala grinned and winked at the two elven women. "They are probably together . . . . . . experimenting!" The women broke into peals of laughter, and with a long suffering groan Legolas pulled Tala out of the kitchen. She waved amidst the laughter and both women called that she should return soon. She nodded, and waved one last time as she was pulled out.
"I like you too and everything, Highness, but do you think I could have my arm back now?" Tala asked as they walked down a hallway.
"Of course, my apologies," Legoals said as he quickly let go.
"So, what are you gonna do today, Princey?"
"Must you use all the silly names?" Legolas asked exasperatedly.
She thought about it, and answered with a very serious, "Yes."
He sighed, and said as they reached door and he said, "This is Gandalf's room. We'll try here and then continue if he's not here."
Tala knocked on the door and raised an eyebrow at Legolas when no one
answered.
"Perhaps the storeroom and cannot hear the knock," he offered.
"Well we might as well check," she said as she opened the door. "I mean before we call for a search party we should at least check his quarters."
Tala paused to look around Gandalf's quarters and her jaw dropped in
disbelief. "I never pictured Gandalf to be a pack rat," she mused aloud.
Legolas nodded, "What he lacks in organization, he more than makes up
for in brilliance."
"Why does he need this?" she asked, holding up what appeared to be the
skull of a Nazgul.
Legolas shuddered, "I haven't the slightest idea."
Tala was about to ask another question about the décor when they heard a noise coming from the doorway across the room.
Legolas held a finger up to his lips and motioned for her to follow him.
As they approached they heard Gandalf speak. "You're mad if you think this position will work, Nerina. It's physically impossible!"
The two heard a chuckle from what sounded like Nerina. "Oh it will work, trust me. I did this all the time with the boys back home. Here, it works better if I arch my back."
"Well, if you're sure you're comfortable."
"Oh I am," she said in a hurried tone. "Please do it quickly. I don't think I can hold it much longer."
By this point Legolas was staring aghast at the doorway and Tala was shaking her head in disbelief and mouthing the words "So wrong."
Deciding that they'd heard enough, Legolas and Tala attempted to beat a fast retreat, but in the process Tala knocked a rather heavy tome off of a nearby table.
"What was that?" they heard Nerina ask.
"I can't be sure," he replied.
After a moment Nerina called out, "Friend or foe?"
"Two friends who wouldn't mind terribly if they happened to go deaf after what they just heard," Tala said sarcastically.
"Well then come in here," Nerina shouted with a laugh.
Legolas and Tala looked at each other worriedly before going into the store room.
"Were you two eavesdropping?" Nerina asked in a playful tone from her position on the floor.
"Li'l bit," Tala said with a nod.
Legolas cleared his throat, "We were trying to find you."
"Well mission accomplished. I've been here playing Twister with Gandalf. It was fun, wasn't it Gandalf?"
"It was very amusing," he said with a smile.
"Well that's lovely," Tala said shortly, "But if you don't mind I need to deprive you of your companion for awhile, Gandalf."
"When can I see you again Nerina?" he asked with an imploring look.
She smiled, "Soon. We'll play Twister again sometime, ok?"
He nodded, "I look forward to it."
Tala shuffled her feet and glared at Nerina, in hopes of ending this little tête-à-tête, an attempt, which was noticed and, of course, ignored by Nerina. Not to be put off quite so easily, Tala made a move to grab her friend and drag her from the room. Legolas, sensing a conflict, attempted to diffuse the situation by tossing Tala over his shoulder and carrying her out of the room.
Naturally, pandemonium ensued and Tala while wriggling about, let forth a string of curse words that even had Nerina blushing.
"I suppose we should follow them," Gandalf mused.
Nerina sighed, "Must we? They're two mature adults, I'm sure they can take care of themselves." She paused a moment before she and Gandalf burst into laughter at that statement.
"I have an idea," Gandalf said conspiratorially.
Nerina leaned in close to him, "We ditch those two like a bad habit and run away together?"
"Perhaps not in those same terms, but yes."
She smiled as she took his offered hand, "I applaud your brilliant idea."
With that the two ran laughing out of the storeroom, past Legolas and Tala, who by this point had fought her way down and was now rubbing a very sore backside, and through the corridor.
"Well, I see where her loyalties lie," sniffed Tala as she stood up slowly, as both she and Legolas stared numbly at the backs of Nerina and Gandalf as they hurried through the arch way leading to the gardens and forest, then slowly turned to face each other.
"Wonderful. Now I'm stuck babysitting you all day," Legolas said with a slight glare.
Tala glared back, "Yeah well, you should feel sorry for me. I have to be stuck with 'you' all day!"
Legolas, being the great diplomatic person he is, just gritted his teeth and said with fists clenched at his sides, "So what do you want to do?"
Tala smirked right back. "I don't know, what do you want to do?"
"I don't know. You're the guest. What do you want to do?"
"I don't know. You're the prince. What do you want to do?"
"I don't- arg! You," the prince emphasized this with a finger pointed right in her face, "are frustrating and annoying!"
Tala pointed right back in his face. "And you are stuck up and a meaniehead!"
The prince opened his mouth to speak, but stopped and said slightly shocked, "What?! What did you just call me?"
"Meaniehead! M-E-A-N-I-E-H-E-A-D!"
"I am not!"
"Are so!"
"Am NOT!"
"Are SO!"
"AM-"
"Would you two kindly keep it down? I'm trying to concentrate on these plans," Thranduil said, sticking his head out of a room down the hall. Both Legolas and Tala blushed slightly, and with quick nods and mumbled apologies, practically ran down the hall. Thranduil chuckled to himself, quite pleased he had gotten them to stop fighting. He returned to his study, and happily went right back to what he was doing – reading a humorous play that Aragorn had sent him. ( (snicker) plans . . . . . . right. Thranduil's so sneaky)
As they walked down the hall, Tala asked, "Where are we going?"
Legolas glanced at her and then away, "To do what I normally do at this time of day."
"Which is what?" Tala inquired.
"Something you could never possibly understand or appreciate," Legolas said with a superior smirk.
Tala grinned, "We are going to check out the women of the Elven court? I didn't know that was a daily scheduled event for you."
Legolas practically tripped over his own feet at this, and looked at her in horror, "Certainly not!"
"Then what are we doing?" Tala asked 'innocently'. "Going to your lessons on how to treat guests?"
Legolas glared at her, "No." And then he ignored her.
By this time though they had reached the outside, and Tala was greeted with the view of elven soldiers battling on a green courtyard. Her mouth formed an "O" in surprise and her eyes widened. Then feeling quite evil, said, "Ooooo. We are here to check out guys. Got it. And you thought I wouldn't appreciate it."
Alright, at this point let's just say Legolas was ready to kill her, but settled for a furious "no" quickly followed by the statement of, "I think I hate you.'
Tala just smiled maddeningly at him and said sweetly, "Hate you too."
Legolas just threw his hands up in frustration and marched away, straight towards a small rack of weapons. Tala quickly followed, wondering what he was going to do. She then caught sight of the weapons, and breathed a small gasp. He turned and looked at her, wondering what had made her do that, and found her transfixed by the assortment of weapons. She lightly, and almost reverently, traced the blade of an Elven sword, then the fletching of an arrow resting in a quiver. But it was when she spied the daggers that her eyes truly lit up. Legolas smirked, "Like what you see?"
Tala quickly snatched her hand back, and looking away, nodded quickly.
"Well, that's nice. But you really shouldn't touch them. They are dangerous for one who doesn't know what to do with them," he said pompously.
Tala looked at him sharply, "What makes you think I don't?"
"You."
"And just what is that supposed to mean?!" she asked, bristling in anger.
"You're a woman. That, and a clumsy human," Legolas said disdainfully.
"Ahem. But if I'm not mistaken, that person practicing over there is a woman, and I know you have seen humans fight. And I am not clumsy. But you are a jerk," she said, completely angry with him.
He, being smart as he was at that moment, snorted, "Right. You probably don't even know what to do with a blade."
Her eyebrow twitched, "O really? Care to bet on it?"
Ignoring the warning signs (and completely forgetting the previous incident in a courtyard), Mr. Smart Prince said, "Why not? I'll have you beaten in two seconds."
"Fine, what's the bet?" she said, clenching her teeth.
"Hmm . . . . . . if I win, you have behave like a true lady for a whole day and wear a dress . . . . . . all day, and the appropriate ones at the appropriate times. Morning, afternoon, and dinner."
She paled, and he grinned, "Scared, my 'lady'?"
She growled, "No. I agree. But if I win, you have to be my personal servant for a whole day. And a NICE one."
Well, by now, they had gotten quite a bit of attention from those already in the courtyard. They all smothered laughter as the woman faced down their prince. Of course, now Legolas knew he couldn't back down and acquiesced. "Fine. Choose your weapon."
She nodded, and extended her hand. He took it and they shook. Those around them cheered, as both contestants had the same thought, 'I won't lose.'
Tala turned, and after simply saying, "Dagger" she bent down and messed with her pant leg. Alright, now everyone in the courtyard was confused. However, all was soon revealed when she straightened and held up a small dirk for everyone's viewing pleasure. They all stared, especially when she just reached behind her to the small of her back and took out another dagger, this one with a blade almost a foot long. Both weapons were works of art, complete with leather hilts, a dark blue jewel on the cross guard, and a smooth ball for the pummel. She raised a brow, and then, feeling unusually gracious, extended them for Legolas to inspect (she even did so hilt first, definitely being nice). He took them gently and examined them. The first thing he noticed was that both were perfectly balanced and while strong enough to do damage, were light enough to not give the wielder a great burden, causing the wielder to rely on speed and agility more than strength. Then he noticed the designs on the blades. The dirk was decorated with a type of coat of arms and language he did not recognize, and a dragon writhed along the blade. But it was the dagger that was a true beauty, for it had intricate designs surrounding a flying horse etched on one side and a wolf on the other. Both he and the crowd surrounding the two were struck by its beauty and appreciated it. Yet he also realized that the blades were extremely well cared for, and extremely sharp. This fact made an alarm go off in his brain, but he ignored it and gave them back. He then turned and selected two Elven daggers from the weapons rack.
Legolas turned back with the blades in hand, and looking around, nodded toward an open area. Tala followed as he led the way, and took up a stance across from him when he stopped. He raised the blade of his right hand to above his heart, while she raised hers to a vertical position in front of her face. Both nodded acknowledgement of the other, and began.
Legolas lunged forward and got the surprise of his life. She wasn't there. He quickly pivoted to find her thrusting straight up toward his mid section. He stepped back quickly, and blocked a side slash she made with the dagger in her right hand. He fell back again, reevaluating his thought on her ability. Tala smirked at his surprised and thoughtful look, and threw him a comment as she put her weight on her left foot, which was behind her. "It seems to me, Blondie, that you forgot what happened the last time I had a dagger in your vicinity."
His thoughts ran, and she saw the realization dawn in his eyes. "That's right, Princey, I had you flat on your back."
The spectators gasped, and then gasped again when he rejoined with, "But only after I had you on yours, dear lady."
Her eyes darkened at the reminder and she sprung. He stepped forward, blocking the dagger with both blades, but forgot the dirk. She brought it up to disembowel him, but in a move that would have done any contortionist credit, he rotated his body to the left to avoid it. Swiftly she removed her blades and ducked his slash aimed for her shoulder. She kicked her leg out to trip him and succeeded. He landed but automatically rolled and her blades sunk into the dirt, missing him completely. With an oath, she tore them from the ground and rolled to the side. Both jumped up and scowled at each other. This was going to take a little longer than they thought.
They circled one another, evaluating each others paces and level of energy. The prince was actually slightly surprised to find they were mostly evenly matched, and Tala was thrilled to find another person other than Nerina who was worth sparring with. Legolas attacked, and Tala blocked the blade of his left hand aimed at her hip with her dirk in her left, and then blocked his upward thrust toward her neck with the dagger in her right hand. Now they were almost nose to nose, and Legolas was surprised to find Tala's eyes gleaming with excitement. While Tala on the other hand, only had one thought, 'His eyes . . . . . are dangerous; I could fall into those eyes . . . . . . '. When this thought actually registered she quickly jumped backwards, and attacked again while Legolas scrambled to catch himself. He blocked, and with a quick flick of his wrist, amazed the crowd by knocking the dirk from her left hand. Tala was in shock, but managed to move back. She stood glaring at him while he threw her a superior smirk. She growled, and with a quick lunge of her own, knocked the dagger of his right hand from his grip. Now it was his turn to be surprised, and he stepped back. However, he forgot to block her now free left hand, and ended up with a solid punch to his ribs.
Okay, so now the crowd was just stunned as they watched both fighters stand away from each other. Tala grinned evilly. They sprang at each other again and Legolas ducked and aimed a slash towards Tala's breastbone. Tala pivoted on her toes to the left, but found she had made a very terrible mistake. She had exposed her back, and before she knew it, his hand grabbed her braid and she screamed. But he just jerked her back against his body, leveling his knife along her throat.
"Do you yield?" he panted next to her ear, his breath tickling just every so slightly.
"Never," she snarled, and in a move that left him astounded by her lack for caring if she was injured, grabbed his wrist and twisted, then stepped to the right out of his grip. She faced him, and then delivered him a knee that had him crying out in agonizing pain and left the crowd wondering if there would be future generations of the royal house. She stepped back, and he crumbled forward, and stood panting while he stayed slumped on the ground for a few moments.
"Do you yield, you bastard?!" she growled, carefully moving her fingers through her hair, thoroughly pissed that he had pulled her hair. She closed her eyes, and then regretted it when she felt her legs go out from under her courtesy of Legolas, who decided to ignore the 'bastard' name calling. She rolled, and came up into a crouch and glared at him where he was crouched a few feet away. The spectators were making so much noise by now that others from the court had joined them, but both contestants ignored them. Both stood slowly and ran at each other with battle cries, and the battle began anew.
Well, the battle went on for what seemed like hours, both weaving, striking and retreating. In actuality, it was only about thirty minutes, but to them it seemed forever. At the end of that thirty or so minutes, they stood panting and glaring at each other with about six feet between them. Legolas had a cut along his ribs, left bicep, and a bloody lip from a well placed punch while Tala had a gash in her right hip, left shoulder, a forming bruise on her jaw, and a tiny knick on her hairline. By now, almost everyone in the vicinity of the courtyard had come to watch, and bets were being taken all around. Even Thranduil had shown up at some point, and was completely pleased to see his son being forced to actually work for a victory, as well as partially worried for their welfare. Nerina and Gandalf had shown up even later, and were now watching with a mixture of amusement and fear, both worrying for their friends. Of course, all were ignored by the two locked in the combat neither refused to lose.
Both stepped forward once more and, almost with a hint of desperation, attacked. Their movements were slower and a bit clumsier, and no more than two minutes later after this clash did both fighters go down when Legolas kicked Tala's feet from under her. She went down, but hooked a foot around his ankle, bringing him down as well. The crowd fell silent as neither one moved for a moment. Both lay panting, and in a last ditch attempt at winning, both raised fists and hit each other. Of course, they had no energy left, and the blows were weak, and after they connected, Tala and Legolas just laid there, heaving in oxygen and trying to muster the energy to continue. But before either could, someone shouted, "Enough!"
The crowd turned toward the voice, and the two fighters raised their heads weakly in its general direction before just letting their heads fall back to earth in exhaustion. Thranduil strode forward, and simply said, "I declare this match a draw."
Naturally, no one was going to argue with him, but someone yelled out, "How is the bet settled?" There were murmurs of agreement through the crowd.
Nerina stepped forward, having already been told the terms of the bet, and said clearly, "Tala will have to wear a dress to the banquet and be the perfect lady while Legolas will behave as the perfect escort." Both Thranduil and Gandalf nodded happily, and the two on the ground glared at her, wishing they had enough energy to hurl their remaining daggers at her. They then slowly sat up, drawing attention back to them.
"And now," Thranduil added, "I believe it is time that these warriors were taken and cleaned up and then allowed to rest. For both must be ready for tonight's banquet." And then he swept away to the castle, leaving the two 'warriors' in the care of their 'friends.'
"I am going to kill you," Tala panted as she sat glaring at Nerina.
Nerina ignored the glare, and laughed as she reached a hand out to help Tala up. "You always say that, but you know you can't live without me."
"So? I will kill you, as soon as I can move normally again," Tala groaned as she straightened. Nerina just grinned, knowing full well she wouldn't.
Legolas also got up slowly, aided by Gandalf, but also agreed with Tala's words. He shot Gandalf an angry glance, to which the wizard just smiled. Then the two fighters were led off the field and to their rooms to recuperate, something they would need if both were to survive the evening.
As/N: And that is that, for now. If you have any questions, please feel free to ask. And hopefully the next installment will be soon . . . . . . with great emphasis on the HOPEFULLY.
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