( Author's Notes: This is going to be the final chapter featuring Sues. Until a new brand of JtHM!Sue comes along, I've pretty much exhausted my sources for now. If I see another type of mainstream Sue come along, I'll either work a chapter into the story, or maybe even write a sequel or one-shot. But for now, I think I've pretty much covered all the basic Sues for this time being. Oh, and by the way…I actually like White Diamonds perfume. "It makes you smell like Elizabeth Taylor. I guess that means you'll smell like bourbon and Vicodin." I like being able to use purple prose in this chapter. Enjoy! )

Johnny looked out his living room window in disgust. These…things, whatever they were, just kept coming, no matter what he did. Avoiding life didn't work; they just came to him. Killing them didn't work; they just came back. They were like insects, and just as brainless and bothersome. There had to be some way to get rid of them.

Sighing, he stood up. "Might as well go find a cheerleading squad to take my frustration out on," Johnny muttered, poking about for his usual torture instruments. They were scattered throughout his living room, still crusted with blood from his last "frustration release." Finally they were gathered and stored in his handy Black Bag, and Johnny was off.

Walking down the street in the slowly fading sunlight, he drew his cheerleading roster from his bag and studied it. Whenever the high schools formed new cheerleading squads, he made sure to take one of the rosters they distributed almost everywhere, so no one could miss their precious practices. "If I'm right, the high school should be in the middle of practice right now. Perfect," he said. He began folding the roster to put back into his back, and as he looked down, Johnny didn't manage to see the girl walking towards him.

WHAM.

The collision threw Johnny onto his back and caused him to crack his head on the sidewalk. For being such a sickly looking person, he was awfully resilient, because he got back up right away, rubbing his head. "Ow…hey, bitch, you'd better…ohh…" His voice trailed off as he got a look at whom he had actually crashed into.

Not another one.

She had long, wavy black hair that was perfectly curled, curves in all the right places, a sexy black dress and matching platforms that accentuated her already amazing figure, a silver pentagram necklace around her perfectly pale neck, and…purple eyes? Who the fuck has purple eyes besides that woman with that nasty perfume? thought Johnny, a disgusted look crossing his face. Her rose-petal lips were forming a smile, since it seemed she had figured he was impressed, by the way his voice trailed off.

"Oh, do forgive me. I've been awfully busy lately, planning revenge on whoever helped make my life a little more angstier than it already is. It's really quite tough, being half-demon, half-angel, half-human, immortal, and unloved by all because your father is Satan and your mother is head of the angel princesses."

Ho-LY fuck, this one's the worst of them all.

The girl gasped, raising a pair of delicate hands to her face, the nails painted a lustrous red, which really matched nothing else she wore. "Oh, pardon me! My manners are terrible. Here, let me help you up," she said, grabbing Johnny's wrist and hoisting him to his feet. He winced and recoiled, but she didn't seem to notice. "There, now that I've helped you up, I suppose I can properly introduce myself. My name is Demonia Satirea, heiress to the kingdom of Wangstoria! I have demon and angelic powers, but I'm also human! I can die, even though I'm immortal! See? I'm not perfect!"

Johnny was speechless. Shaking his head in a defeated sort of way, he opened his bag once again and began rummaging through it, tossing various items of diabolical torture onto the ground, muttering to himself.

Demonia blinked those amethyst eyes of hers. "Are you alright? I saw you looking through that when you were walking down the street. Did you lose something? Can I use my amazing powers to help you?" Her response was an irritated glare as Johnny stood up, clutching the biggest knife in his collection in one hand and a fully charged taser in the other.

"You know, I was originally planning my afternoon vent around the cheerleading squad. But since you showed up, another link in a disgusting chain of recent events, I think you'll do just fine. I'll just cut to the point with this one." Sparing his usual rant, he leapt towards Demonia, his knife brandished and the electrodes of his taser crackling with electricity.

Gasping, Demonia immediately drew her arms in an X-formation over her face, causing a pair of wings to sprout from her back, in a flurry of feathers and sparkles. (Dark sparkles, mind you.) They were traditional demon wings, but instead of the normal structure frame, made of leather, it was made of black feathers. They drew themselves around her body, and when Johnny's knife struck them uselessly, they caused sparks to fly. "The fuck?" he wondered aloud, trying to stab them again. "These things are hard as stone!"

Cackling, Demonia's wings unfolded, and Johnny could see that her eyes were now glowing red. "You like them? They're made of brimstone and sulfur! Your useless human weapons cannot pierce my wings!"

As soon as she said "brimstone and sulfur," Johnny wrinkled his nose. "So that's what the smell was. I thought a building had caught on fire."

"Wrong again, puny human! Now! Watch me fly so I can look dramatic as I kill you!" she yelled, taking off into the air. Unfortunately, her wings were quite heavy. As she soon found out, flying with large slabs of rock on your back isn't exactly graceful. She was only able to get about four feet into the air, and frowned as she realized this. "Well. I suppose I can still hover. But I'm still going to kill you," she said pointedly. Laughing loudly, she drew her arms around in a circle, forming a ring of purple and black energy around her body.

With an expression that could only be summed up as "bitch, please," Johnny shook his head. "Yeeeah. This is starting to get ridiculous. I think I'll do something nice for once in my life and just put you out of your misery now," he said, reaching down for his knife. Apparently, the triple-half creature in the air couldn't hear him, because she still hovered, looking—or trying to look—fierce and angry.

Here goes nothing, thought Johnny, since he had never done this sort of thing before. He thrust his knife into the air, hoping that he would do something right for once. Looking up, he watched the blade sail through the air in an arch, and it pierced the center of the pentagram necklace. Demonia fell to the ground in a screaming, twisting heap as her body surged with purple electricity, stemming from the shattered pentagram. "My…my necklace! The source of my power; how did you know?!"

"Um…" Johnny quirked an eyebrow. "I didn't?"

Demonia screamed in agony, raising a hand into the air. "My kingdom will never have its most powerful ruler! I'll never get to meet an equally evil prince! NOOOooo…" Her expression froze in place as her entire body stiffened, then disintegrated into a pile of dark, sparkly purple dust. Johnny could only stare at it in disbelief before pulling his knife out of the pile.

"Well, that was a strange one," he said to himself. He bent down to put his knife back in his bag, but behind him came a pair of footsteps…

"Did you kill our sister?"

Whirling around, Johnny saw a pair of identical demon-angel-human…things behind him. Their arms were crossed and their expressions furious. The only difference between them and the one he had just killed was their hair colors—one was a brunette, the other a blonde.

"Fuuuuuck! No! No!" Johnny yelled, dropping his head into his hands. "Not more of them! Damnit! Shit! I just got done with this one!" Frustrated, he stormed over to the nearest tree and began hitting his head on the trunk. "Why—can't—they—leave—me—" He smacked his head just a little too hard on the last word, because Johnny suddenly fell over backwards into the grass unconcious, leaving the other two to stare at him blankly.

The blonde blinked. "Wow. Someone forgot his antidepressants."

"Yeah," said the brunette. "Let's just take Demonia's ashes and get the hell out of here." They produced a baggie out of seemingly nowhere and brushed the ashes and pentagram fragments into it, then disappeared back to the kingdom of Wangstoria.

Meanwhile, Johnny lay in the grass, bark splinters tangled in his hair, slightly bleeding in the forehead. He was slipping deeper into unconciousness…