Brooke stared absently at the computer screen as her brain tried to make sense of the jumbled array of numerical figures and dollar signs. It was useless as her concentration was elsewhere and she didn't even have the pleasure of one of Gordon's usual distractions. Her best friend was away for a few days on assignment to Tokyo and Brooke was miserable. Work had been particularly stressful and that had meant longer hours at the office and less time at home with Harmony. And now she found herself in the familiar position after hours in her plush executive office munching on a stale turkey sandwich, sipping Mt. Dew that had flattened since the morning and engrossed in more work than she knew what to do with. But it wasn't just the job that had her down. She couldn't shake Lucas out of her mind.

"Hey you. Looks like you could use some company?"

"Actually, I could use a nice stiff drink…a couple of them. Come in, Chantal."

The younger girl smiled as she made her way into her friend's office.

"You look tired. Want to talk about it?"

"Not particularly", Brooke sighed. "There isn't really much to talk about. I guess I'm just tired."

"Look, I know I'm no Gordon or anything but…it's just that you've been through a lot and you've always been such a good friend to me so if there is anything I could ever do for you, then I'm here. Even if it is just to listen."

"Thanks", Brooke smiled. "That's really sweet, Chantal. But I'm okay. Really."

"If you say so", she shrugged.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing…you've just been so moody lately."

"I am not moody!" Brooke began immediately on the defensive.

"Okay. Whatever you say. It's just that one minute today you looked like you were going to cry because you missed your daughter so much, then Gordon called and that seemed to make you really happy, then another phone call came and you got upset all over again. The capper for me was when you made the poor baker across the street cry."

"I did not make him cry…"

"Yes you did, Brooke. Sorry but I spent half my lunch break consoling him."

"Oh well. That's what he gets for running out of those Blueberry Tart things I like so much."

The two women looked at each other and burst out laughing.

"So I guess I have been bitchy lately, huh?"

"I said moody but if the title fits…", Chantal teased.

"It's just because I'm tired", Brooke pouted. "And I'm hungry. And I need a cigarette. And I'm lonely. I am way desperate for a little fun in my life. I get bored out of my mind. I miss my daughter. Then my mother calls with some crap about us spending more time together and bonding and somehow that led to yet another argument…big surprise. And I'm horny and…"

"What? You may as well go on."

"I…I'm pissed off at Lucas…I think."

"What else is new?" Chantal grinned. "What did he do this time?"

"I invited him over last week after the baby was asleep. And I have the hot tub boiling, the candles lit, fresh flowers everywhere and underneath my robe I am looking absolutely to die for in an itsy bitsy black bikini. And I have champagne and strawberries but it didn't even get that far because as soon as I started massaging and kissing him and getting naked, he jumps out of the Jacuzzi like he had just seen a ghost or something."

"Wait a sec…aren't you guys divorced?"

"Almost. There was a glitch in the paperwork with the division of the assets so our lawyers needed a little bit more time. Anyway, that's beside the point. The point is, I was horny and he had the nerve to reject me."

Chantal laughed out loud before she could help herself.

"Brooke…"

"Tell me about it. Can you believe the nerve of that guy?"

"What do you mean Luke's nerve? No offense, but what about your nerve?"

"Excuse me?"

"Okay. First of all, please do not get mad because you know I love you to death but Brooke…you're the one who wanted this, remember? You filed for the divorce and pretty much everything else since then has been on your terms. I don't want to take sides or anything but let's face it, you were pretty shitty to Lucas after the whole cheating thing. And not that I'd blame you because God knows how I'd react in that type of situation but you've been calling the shorts ever since that all happened."

"So?"

"So…isn't it a little presumptuous of you to assume that he'd want to go to bed with you? Don't get me wrong, you are a beautiful and sexy woman and I'm sure he still loves you but the fact of the matter is, you guys will be divorced pretty soon. And when that is the case, you guys will have to move on, right? I mean, isn't that the whole point?"

"Yeah but…"

"But what? Brooke, listen to yourself. You're being kind of…well, selfish."

"But I was horny", she protested. "And not just 'oh let me break out the old reliable vibrator and get myself off' horny. No way. Chantal, we are so beyond that point. I'm talking about the 'can't eat, can't breathe, can't think, can't sleep, headed straight for the asylum if you don't get a male touch' horny."

"Been there unfortunately, trust me but is that Lucas' problem?"

"I…I guess I hadn't thought about it like that."

"Well, maybe you should, sweetie", Chantal said gently. "Because it isn't fair to him or to you. The last thing in the world he probably wanted was to walk out of that Jacuzzi but he did what was probably best, Brooke. You wanted a divorce and now you've got one. That was just his way of setting you both free."

"Don't make me gag. Gosh, Chantal are you on Luke's payroll now? You two sound just alike. Where is my Gordie when I need him? It was just sex."

"Was it?"

"Of course. What else would it be?"

"Never mind. I don't want to get into this…"

"No. Say it, Chantal."

"I don't want to offend you."

"You won't offend me. I'm a big girl and I can take it. Besides, we're friends, right?"

"Fine", Chantal said with a deep breath. "I don't think it is about sex at all. I think it's about control. See, I learned about this stuff in my Psych class. You were obviously and rightfully so very angry at and hurt about your husband cheating. That manifested itself into a love/hate type of relationship, which by the way is very unhealthy. Anyway, you didn't know how to channel the pain and the pent up rage combined with the fact that you still loved the man and you were carrying his baby. So subconsciously you devised a plan to punish him. Because in a way, you felt he had punished you, so to speak, with his indiscretion so that was your way of getting back at him. And you had the upper hand because he was wrong and he was sorry. So everything you did…being mean to him, filing for divorce, threatening the abortion…everything was to punish Lucas for what he did. I don't think you liked being mean to him and I know you didn't want an abortion and I really don't think you intended to ever let this divorce fiasco get so far. It was all about control and dishing it out to him as long as it made you feel better. Now the tables are turned. Lucas realizes what he's done and he has accepted the consequences. He's almost at peace with it. Now with that peace, it evens the playing field and you can't stand that."

Brooke felt her cheeks redden. She was desperately trying to remain calm, after all, she had practically dragged the comments out of Chantal but now she was boiling mad!

"Are you done?"

"Yeah, I…"

"Good because that is the biggest crock of shit I've ever heard! Really Chantal! You take one stupid class and all of a sudden you think you're ready for Oprah to give you your own spin off talk show!"

"Brooke…"

"That is so far from the truth!"

"I don't think it is but maybe I'm wrong. Look, I didn't want to piss you off or hurt your feelings. That's just my opinion, okay? I'm sorry if…"

"It's okay. Look, I have a lot more work to do so if you could please just excuse me…"

"Brooke…"

"Chantal, I'm busy. We'll talk tomorrow, okay?"

Chantal simply nodded her head and left Brooke to fume in solitaire. Although she would never admit it, Chantal had touched a nerve. Brooke spent the next hour or so trying to convince herself that her friend had been wrong. She was just a simple and naïve kid who didn't know any better and all of a sudden thought one class made her a shrink for the world. Right? What if it wasn't all a crock of shit? What is all the bickering and talk of divorce was just a way to dig at and punish Lucas after all? What if the plan, if there ever was one, went too far?

Brooke needed a moment to clear her head. She grabbed her jacket and took a walk. She walked for blocks and blocks trying to access the situation and found herself in front of a corner liquor store. She knew excessive alcohol intake was bad for her body while breastfeeding but at the moment, it wasn't registering. Nothing was. Nothing made sense anymore, Brooke thought as she loaded up on Jack Daniels, Jim Bean, Tanqueray, Southern Comfort and a flask to put it all in. She briskly made the walk back to her office and plopped down at her desk. At exactly what point had life become so complicated? Things used to be normal and she used to be so happy. Now everything was beyond mixed up. With tears streaming down her cheeks, she pulled out the flask and began pouring, ready to indulge in a combination or stomach and head would hate her for come morning.

Her hands shook as she heard footsteps. Who could it be after nine p.m.? She decided she didn't give a damn as she raised the flask to her lips. Then she saw the shadow in the doorway. Brooke opened her mouth but no words came out. The tears seemed to freeze and a smile of utter relief spread across her make up smeared face. It felt so good to see him at that moment, like God had sent a real life angel to her. She put down the flask as more tears fell. She yearned to speak, to say something but only his name could escape her lips in a forced whisper.

"Felix…"