Numair watched in tepid silence as Daine, supporting herself on all fours slowly circled where he sat hunched, her eyes ablaze with the fiery need for blood. Despite his constant, inward assurances that he would soon gain hold of this situation, Numair found himself beginning to tremble, more violently with each passing second. Slowly, he found himself moving to hug his knees in an attempt to find some sort of comfort within himself. Though he sought vigorously, he found nothing as his reward. He did not fear this way for himself or his own life, but rather for that of his lover. He did not care that his own life was at risk this moment, or that his own blood was likely to be spilled. All that he could think of was that Daine might come to harm in all of this if he could not get a hold of himself. He had to conquer fear for her sake and her sake alone.
As she circled him, Numair noticed that every now and then, she would bare her teeth at him, as if daring him to make a move towards her. As she was now nothing but a beast trapped in the body of a two legger, she could not sense the danger of his immense black Gift. She did not know that at any moment, by just a single word from his lips, she could fall instantly to her death or perhaps something worse. The fact that he was a mage and a black robe meant nothing to her now, for to an animal he was nothing but another man. She thirsted for his blood, to spill it and feel it coat her fur, drizzling down her chin. Her lust for killing blazed openly in her once peaceful blue gray orbs, striking fear into the foolish two legger.
Just as Veralidaine Sarrasri had no way of knowing and understanding that she now faced a mage, she knew not that he was her lover, her mate. She could not see that like air to her lungs, he was what she took every breath for. He was what gave her life, and made her happy and free. She could not see that she loved him deeply and that he returned that love and more. She was blind to the feelings of a two legger and could see only what a wolf could. All she could see now was that he was her enemy because he was a man. She could hear the very blood pounding through his veins as the emotion of fear began slowly taking full control of himself and his actions. She knew that mentally, she was winning her battle with the two legger and soon she would have him to do what she pleased with and what she wanted was to tear away at his flesh and hear his dying cries of pain and anguish. She wanted to hear him moan in agony as the sting of death and its coldness slowly seeped over him, claiming him as its own. She wanted to devour him for what he was, a man. For men had long been the sworn enemy of the wolf and for that this two legger would pay.
But suddenly, a bitter sense of understanding began to trickle into her mind, creeping rapidly into its core. Soon, she could see through knew eyes, knowing who she was and what she was doing. Her name was Veralidaine Sarrasri, the bastard daughter of a hedge witch and the wild mage of Tortall. She was a fried to the famous and the lover of a black robe mage. She had saved the lives of many and had remained humble all along. As this understanding came to Daine and she knew suddenly who and what she was, she saw also what she was doing and wanted desperately to stop, but found that she had no control over her muscles and limbs. Her magic, the copper center of her mind and soul could not be touched by her now, for it was lost and had taken full control of her body. Tiny sparks of copper and black fire floated around inside her, mixing together.
Not daring to take his eyes off of his lover, Numair watched her without relent. He barely stopped to blink or even to breathe. He was afraid with every bone in his body that if his attention were to stray even for a moment, she would see that breech and spring for an attack. He feared that moment, for he did not want to be put in a position where he might be tempted to hurt her in order to save his own life. Numair knew that he could never live with himself if she were to die at his own hand this night when he could have sacrificed himself for her sake. For now, the only idea that had any sort of soothing affect on him was that she could sense that he was a mage. He knew from his studies that of all the creatures, wolves were particularly cleaver and since he knew that his Daine would likely be taking on the form of a wolf now, he could only assume that she could somehow smell his Gift and know that it was a danger to her if he were to use it.
It was as Numair pondered over these thoughts that he saw the sudden change come over his lover. He could see it the very instant it happened, for he had been paying such close attention to her every twitch of movement. At that very moment, he could probably have identified just how many times her chest had risen and fallen as she took in precious air, for he had been that attentive. In any case, he could see now a very obvious change, though he doubted it was only that obvious to him because he knew the woman he loved well. Where he had only moments before seen the fierce gaze of a predator in her eyes, he now began to see that look fade as her eyes softened into their normal blue gray coloration. That twist of her lips that had only moments before formed a snarl as she bared her teeth at him vanished and was replaced by a sober, almost look about her. Her eyes remained closely fixed on his crouched and trembling form as they had before, only this time it was different. This time it was as if she were once again looking at him as a lover and a two legger would and not a wild beast.
Just as he now saw that his Daine had managed to force her way back to him, he could see also that the small hold that she had was weak. The panicked look in her eye told him immediately that she still could not control her limbs and would be unable to stop herself from attacking him if it came to that. Seeing that a part of her was still there and that all was not lost crumbled Numair in a way he had not imagined it would. It made him know without a doubt that he could not fight her off if he were to attack, not with her like this. She would see it through a two legger's eyes, despite the fact that she was acting like a wolf. He could not do that to her.
"Numair," Daine groaned, her eyes watering over with tears that threatened to fall. "You can't be here…" she urged, her voice beginning to shake along with her entire body as she began the inner struggle to keep a hold on herself. Numair loved her now more than ever as he watched her battle herself with utmost courage. From the defiance he saw in her depths, he knew that she fought not for herself, but for him. He could not lose her tonight.
"Hush, Daine," Numair struggled to talk calmly so as not to frighten her. He found himself failing though for his voice shook now harder than ever. "I'm not leaving you like this." He had fought for his demeanor to remain collected, but he knew that he was not fooling her. After all, she had the senses of a wolf now and she could smell the fear that radiated from his entire being.
Frustrated, Daine made one last defiance. She could not let him stay with her now, no matter how much he insisted. She had to make him see that if he did not run now, it would be his death. She had hoped that with this second chance he would be able rebuild the barrier in her mind that separated her from her magic before any of this happened. She had taken to long though, and now she had to pay the price. She would have to suffer things out without him, if only she could get him to leave now before it was to late. Soon, the wolf inside her would have taken over her entire being and she would be able to do nothing but sit and watch while she killed him.
"No, you d-don't understand!" Daine yelled, voice reaching great heights and shaking. She immediately burst into tears, praying to every god she could name that he would just listen to her. "Don't worry about me, just get yourself out!"
Her heart beat with rapid fear as he began to inch closer to her with every second. His eyes burned deep into her, as if searching her. He held her gaze, distracting her from his movements. Before she had any notion of what he was doing, he dove swiftly towards her, arms outstretched. Once his body collided with hers, he threw his arms around her shoulders, drawing her roughly to his chest as he trapped her arms at her sides so that she could not struggle. Though Daine fought him while she was still herself, she lost quickly for he was a fully grown man and was much stronger than she. They both fell violently to the hard wood floor of their bed chamber, Numair falling on top of her and pinning her arms to her sides. By now, Daine was sobbing while still trying to break free from his grasp. She had no idea why she was fighting him, all she knew was that she could not stop herself from doing so.
"Listen to me, Daine, "he voiced as calmly and collected as he could manage, "You need to calm down and concentrate on your magic." He directed her as best as he could, all the while wondering if it would work or not. He knew that it would be a feat in itself to get her to calm herself enough for him to perform the task at hand. "I can help you," he soothed, lightly stroking her upper arms with his thumbs as he held her firmly in place. It hurt him to be using force on her like this and when she was in her right mind once again he would do everything within his power to make things up to her. He knew that the force he had used already would likely leave bruises and perhaps a cut or two. It burned him that he had had to do that to her.
Numair soon found out that his efforts to over power his lover and fix the barrier in her mind were in vain. Before he knew what was happening, he could feel her shift uncomfortably beneath his weight, scrambling with even more force to break free from his hold. She knew what was about to happen and though she fought with herself to stop it, she could not hold it off forever.
"Numair, let go!" she screamed as he continued to try to subdue her. His grip on her arms increased and she groaned in pain as he continued to push her to the floor. She could once again feel the sense of wolfish desire seeping over her, slowly taking control of her. She could feel the very blood rushing through his veins as though it were a river rushing with water. She could hear his heart pounding as her ear was pressed up against his chest. She could smell fear radiating from his body as only a wolf could. New smells filled her nostrils and old ones were magnified to an extent she could never have imagined possible. Her hearing grew steadily better as did her strength, for she was adopting all of the traits of a wolf once more.
No!" he shouted back, stinging her ears with the loud vibrating sound of his voice. Gasping, Numair drew in ragged breaths, exhausted from the ongoing fight she posed him. Suddenly when he could both see and feel the change coming over her again and not for the good. Helplessly, he gazed upon her with longing for her to come back to him once more so that he could fix all this as he watched the crazed, fiery lust for blood return to her once peaceful eyes.
Before Numair knew what was happening, she was once again fighting to free herself from his grasp, but this time with much more force. Her strength had doubled, no tripled what it had been only moments before. He did not stand a chance as she pushed him roughly off of her to land on the cold hard wood floor. As soon as he hit the ground, he rolled quickly to move out of the way of her vicious advances. She was no longer playing games with him as she had been before when the wolf inside her took over. Now, it was obvious that she meant business as she dove this way and that, trying to get to him.
He managed to dodge her several times before she was finally able to pounce him to the ground. Grabbing her arms, he tried to push her back, but now that she had the strength of a wolf she was just too strong for him. She had him on the floor in a second's time. She began clawing at him and snapping her jaws, brandishing her teeth like tiny knives. "Daine, don't do this!" he pleaded with her, all the while trying to push her weight off of him. Nothing in all his life had been so hard as trying to fight her this night, for hurting her was the very last thing he wanted to do. "It isn't you!"
If Daine heard his pleas, she showed no notion of it as she continued her attack on him. Bits of fur began forming on her arms as she swung at him. So far, her scratching and thrashing of him had been nothing but to the extent of punching, and though it hurt it had not done any serious damage, but as Numair watched the fur forming on her arms, he knew that soon she would have claws and teeth that could do serious damage.
His prediction was right, for soon after the fur began spreading down her arms to her wrists, her fingers began shortening into wolf-like paws with long, needle sharp claws at the end of each padded finger. Within and instant of gaining these new fatal weapons, she swiped at Numair with her claws, raking them across his bare chest and tearing a deep cut there. He cried out in sudden pain as he felt her continue to scratch at him, all the while snarling and snapping from atop him.
Unconsciously, Numair began to build up the black fire of his Gift around his hands, setting them aglow with it. Without stopping to think about his actions, Numair blasted at the girl that held him pinned to the floor with his raw magic. He winced when she yelped in pain, emitting a wolf-like cry. When he had blasted her with his magic, she went flying off of him and slammed into the nearby wall. He had not by any means meant to hit her that hard, but he had been unable to control it. She law now beneath the window sill, whining like a wounded animal. "Great Mithros, what have I done…." Numair cursed under his breath scrambling up from where he lay on the floor so that he could reach her. She lay with her back to him, facing the wall. He knew that he had hurt her, for she was not moving. "Please, let her be all right." Numair prayed as he ventured nearer to his love, hoping that he had somehow awaken the two legger within her. Perhaps that jolt of raw Gift had done the trick. He could only hope that it had. All the while he cursed himself for selfishly trying to stop his own pain by attacking her himself.
He had not gotten but within three feet of her when she shifted from where she lay, rolling onto her other side. Fearfully, he took a single step back wondering if he would now be meeting his lover or a wolf. He watched as she tilted her head up to look at him, all the while nursing her shoulder where his Gift had hit her with her spare hand or paw rather. Her fur and wolfish claws had not yet returned to their normal state and that worried the mage. His feet remained firmly planted and his guard up as he watched his lover slowly begin to lurch to her feet.
It was only then that he got a proper look at her face. He could see from her eyes that she had come back to him, but only slightly. She was still very much a wolf and could not control her actions any more than she could mere moments ago when she had been attacking him. She looked ragged and broken; very different from how he had ever seen her this night. Her eyes were sad as she gazed upon him, her lips stern. It was almost as if she knew something that he did not.
Numair watched in horror as she trembled and twitched, fighting constantly within herself to keep the wolf from breaking free again. A tear streamed down her face as she braced herself against the wall behind her, all the while keeping her eyes intent on Numair. She clamped them tightly shut suddenly, as if he great pain, and forced out these words, "I cant live without you….I won't do it, not again," she voiced raggedly, moving closer to the bare window while still bracing herself against the wall. Numair was rooted to where he stood, unable to move for the shock of her words. There was something important that he did not know, that much he could see in her eyes. He wanted to ask her what she meant by her words, why she felt she needed to say them now. He wanted to move towards her and fix the barrier, but he could not move himself to do either.
Daine looked on and Numair, knowing that he could never understand what was going through her mind now. He had to be terribly confused and that was her own fault. All she could think of now as the wolf fought to break through once more was the life she had been forced to live in her dream. She remembered the pain she had felt when Alanna had explained what had happened to Numair. She remembered the feelings and emotions she felt as she watched Numair's coffin being lowered into the ground. She remembered her painful return to the tower when she boxed up all of the tearful reminders she had left of Numair. Finally, she remembered that day when she had been visiting Numair's grave when she had decided to give up her life as a two legger and become the wolf that had killed her lover. She knew then as these pictures flashed through her mind that she could never live that way again.
He watched, stunned as she began undoing the brass lock on the window with trembling hands. He was frozen firmly in place, still not understanding what was going on. Perhaps if so much had not already happened this night and he had not already been ready to burst from all of the thoughts that moved rapidly through his mind like wildfire, Numair would have been able to piece together just what Daine was doing. He was unable to do so, and now all that he could do was sit back and watch in the dark as his worst fears became a horrifying reality.
Blinded by tears as she fought away all of her desires to plunge back into her wolfish state, Daine finally undid the brass lock on the bed chamber window and thrust it open as far is it would go. Her hands trembled with fear and utmost sadness. She had not wanted things to end this way, but she would rather it be her that had to sacrifice rather than him. She could not live like she had in her dream. As soon as the window had been opened, a whirl of chaos spun into the room. A large gust of wind blew frantically into the room along with large drops of rain. The noise of the storm was magnified many times now that there was no window to block it out, and Numair found himself shielding his eyes from the flashes of lightning and sudden booms of thunder that shook the room. "Daine!" he shouted over the storm, trying to again gain sight of her and know that she was all right. He wondered frantically if the wolf had again claimed her mind and if he should prepare for another attack.
"I won't let you die for me…" Daine said, tears streaming down her face as her eyes met Numair's. It was only they that it truly dawned on him what she meant to do. He found himself in sudden panic, trying to somehow stop her but finding that he was too late. "I love you, Numair."
With those last words, Daine lifted herself up onto the window sill with trembling hands, body twitching worse than ever for she was about to lose herself once again. Waiting no longer, she kept her eyes locked with Numair's coal black orbs and threw herself out of the bed chamber window and into the eye of the storm raging outside. She fell the whole two stories to the base of the tower as she had expected before she jumped and down the side of the cliff that lay over the Emerald Ocean. Hitting countless jagged rocks on the cliff's edge on the way down, she landed finally into the crashing waves of the sea, her body tostled carelessly in the stormy ocean current.
A/N: oops….did I just do that? Oh well….don't worry or anything because I DO know what I'm doing…I think….sigh I know you all are wondering what's going to happen and I actually am sorry for cutting things off there. I just REALLY wanted to get a chapter up. Just hang on and maybe if I get enough reviews to inspire me, I'll update as soon as humanly possible! REVIEW!