The Very Unnecessary Chapter Of Outtakes
Authors: US!!!!!
Ying: Okay! This is your punishment for not reviewing. A chapter of complete nothingness. Yang and I were bored in school, so we decided to make a little side story of outtakes. Review and we'll put up part 2…maybe…
Yang: What can I say, our inspiration runs on your reviews. No reviews, no inspiration.
Ying: Since we never have enough time to put in outtakes at the end of our chapters, so here you go!
Yang: As you all know I, Yang, am the director. So whatever I say, goes. Ying is my assistant.
Episode 58
Fateful Night in Togenkyo, Part II
Take 1
Ying: (Has that little black and white clicky thing. Tries to snap it and ends up crushing her finger.) OWWWW!!! My finger!!!!
Yang: What is going on here!?
Ying: Mnmninmnindn…finger…..ohhhhh…(holds finger to Yang's face)
Yang: Do you want me to bite it off?
Ying: No….(shakes head meekly.)
Yang: Then get it out of my FACE!!!!!! Stop the cameras! Let's start this over people! Ying! Bandage that finger and hurry up!
Fateful Night in Togenkyo Part II
Take 2
Ying: (Clicky thing reappears and cameras roll.) Action!!! Owwww…(Crushes another finger.)
InuYasha: Kagome!! Uhhhhh……Ummmm…..
Ying: Yang!! Didn't you tell him!!!???
Yang: I figured he'd read the script. Put a towel on the poor girl. She's gotta be freezing.
Ying: Uh, Yang? InuYasha is coming and he don't look to happy…
InuYasha: WHY IS SHE NAKED!!!!!! SHE'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE NAKED! NO ONE TOLD ME ABOUT THIS!!!!!!!!
Ying: It was in your script.
Yang: Don't you read?
InuYasha: (Pulls out script; shoves it in Yang's face) I don't see it!
Ying: (Pulls out magnifying glass and holds it to paper where small print is found.) There it is. Please don't hurt me. I didn't write it…
Yang: Now that you know what to expect could you please go over there and START THIS AGAIN!!!!!!!!!
Fateful Night in Togenkyo Part II
Take 3
Ying: Action!
InuYasha: (You can hear him crashing down the stairs. There's a crack and you hear InuYasha yell and slam into the door.) OUCH!!!!
Ying: What just happened? Don't tell me he just crashed into the door. Please don't tell me he did that. Don't tell me!
Yang: I think he did. Oh god! I think he did!
Ying: (Grabs megaphone.) Clean up, aisle seven. Can we have a cleanup crew on aisle seven? CAN SOMEONE PLEASE GET HIM UP AND START THIS OVER AGAIN.
Yang: (starts throwing spiked yin yang disks as if they were ninja stars) Get into place people!
Ying: DUCK AND COVER PEOPLE!!!! Just do what she says, and we'll keep our heads. Please, just do it…
Fateful Night In Togenkyo Part II
Take 4
Ying: Action!
InuYasha: Kagome!
Kagome: InuYasha!
Unknown Voice: Will you bear my child?
2nd Unknown Voice: Oh Miroku! You're such a kidder!
Ying: (Pulls out sword and stalks off into the back round) (In distant voice) If you don't stop flirting with every girl you come upon I'm gonna kill you. Oh! Sango, I leave him to you…
BAM! WHAM! CRASH! SLAP! BONK! KICK! SMASH!
Ying: Okay, Sango took care of him…let's get back to shooting this scene, shall we?
Yang: (mutters to self) Why me? Why me? All I want to do is shoot one scene. One stinking scene!
Ying: It's okay Yang. As long as we shoot the scene eventually…during tonight, cause if we wait longer, InuYasha will turn into a hanyou and we'll have to wait until next month…don't hurt me…
Yang: Alright people! (Starts throwing Yin Yang circles at everyone) Quiet on the set!!!
Fateful Night In Togenkyo Part II
Take 5
InuYasha: Kagome!!
Kagome: InuYasha!!!
Both:……. (Anime bubbles)
InuYasha: Uhhhh…(stares at Kagome's naked body as she stands up in the spring)
Kagome: Uhh…
InuYasha: Ummm
Kagome: Ahhh!!! (She quickly conceals herself in water)
InuYasha: (Thinks while blushing) She's alive!
Kagome: (Steps out of water) InuYasha, are you all right?
InuYasha: Feh…(Cell phone goes off. The ring tone is Simple Plan's: Don't Wanna Think About You. People look around to see whose cell phone it is.)
Ying: That is NOT my cell phone! Whose cell phone it that? I like the ring tone! Gimmie the ring tone!!!!!
Yang:(twitch…twitch…) Mnmnmnmnmnmnmnmnmnmn OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOooooooo…
Ying: Translation (holds up piece of paper) She wants to shoot one scene…but the cell phone is preventing her…
Yang: GGGggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr RRRRRRrrooooooaaaarrrrr!!!!!!
Ying: (still holding paper) Now she's angry…She says she going to kill the person who has the cell phone…
Yang: (grabs cell phone. Breaks it in half. And throws it into the sauna.) GGGGrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!! Webezebe…mnmnmnmnmnmnmnmnmnmn…oooooooooooo!
Ying: (still holding paper) She says she's not paying for that. It's his fault he brought it. Next person whose cell phone goes off is dead…I think she's very serious…
Jaken: Is she so dumb that she can't speak Japanese?
Ying: (Sweat drops) You didn't just say that…Please tell me you didn't say that…I may not like you that much...But…you're dead…
Yang: (takes out yin yang disks and flings them at Jaken) -said in English- You!!!!!!!!!!!! I'll give you Japanese!!!!!
Ying: (holds sign over head) Oh, my God!!! She's going on rampage. She's gonna blow…Duck for cover!!!! (Pulls Sesshy down with her.)
Yang: AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Fateful Night in Togenkyo Part II
Take 900
Ying: (still holding sign over her head, which has several disks stuck in it…) Action!!
InuYasha: Kagome!!! (Steps on peach conveniently placed on the floor) AHHHHHHH!!!!! (slides and crashes into the sauna.)
Kagome: AHHHHHHH!!!! SIT!!!! (InuYasha crashes back into the water. Multiple sits and two hours later…) Sit, Sit, Sit, and SIT!!!!
Yang: My poor actor…
Ying: (pulls out sword) Mineminenebciasufhciykabakjheg…ohhhhhhhhohhhhhhh….Okay, this is the last take for this scene, if we don't get it right, then we'll wait until next month, cause I'm getting sick of this!!!!!
Fateful Night In Togenkyo Part II
Take 901 (finally…)
Ying: (Yawns…) Action…
InuYasha: Kagome!!
Kagome: InuYasha
Both:……. (Anime bubbles)
InuYasha: Uhhhh…(stares at Kagome's naked body as she stands up in the spring)
Kagome: Uhh…
InuYasha: Ummm
Kagome: Ahhh!!! (She quickly conceals herself in water)
InuYasha: (Thinks while blushing) She's alive!
Kagome: (Steps out of water) InuYasha, are you all right?
InuYasha; Heh, these are just scratches. (takes off Fire-Rat Robe.) Eh, c-cover up. It's torn, but it's better than nothing.
Kagome: Thank you.
InuYasha: Haha (Get's up) Ugh! (Falls down.)
Kagome: InuYasha! You've been fighting so hard, even though you're a human now.
Miroku: (Pops out of InuYasha's hair. He's been chibizized.) Uhhh, this wouldn't be bad timing, would it?
Kagome: (Turns bright red. Cue in sound effect…) AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Yang: (In background) Where's Shippo?
Ying: I dunno…Let's just keep shoo-Gasp (makes weird face.)
Yang: What's wrong?
Ying: (points a shaking finger at set) Shippo…
Yang: (looks) CUT!! CUT!!! Stop the cameras. (It was too late. Sees Shippo walking across the scene with a Coke in one hand and a cell phone in the other. Ying and Yang start screaming silently…)
Yang: No, no, no, no…(takes knife, getting ready to stab herself…)
Ying: No, Yang!! Don't do it!!! Let me go first!!!
InuYasha: Come off it! (hits Ying and Yang on the head.) We'll do this next month…
Ying and Yang: Miniebjkaskuvasnmsassjhvasdhb. (Sobs.)
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX
Yeah, that was our first one…keep reading…it gets better….
Interview for Character of Miroku…(The horror)
1st Person: Mikado Sanzenin
(from Ranma 1/2)
Yang: Soo? You used to be a figure skater. Interesting.
Mikado: You have beautiful eyes.
Yang: Well you sure have the ladies man part down.
Mikado: (kneels in front of Yang) Would you like me to kiss you?
Yang: No. Security!
Ying: (runs out of back room carrying a bowl of ice cream in one hand, a spoon in mouth, and sword in other hand.) Get out!! Get out!!! Be gone, vile demon child of hell!! (Clobbers Mikado over head with the spoon over and over again.)
Mikado: Your spunkiness reminds me of the little pig-tailed girl. Can I have just one kiss?
Ying: NOOOOO!!!! (Swings sword at Mikado's head and kicks him out the door.
Yang: I have a feeling this is going to be a long, long interview.
Ying: Okay, NEXT!!!!
2nd person: Master Roshi
(Dragon Ball Z)
Ying: Okay…so you're a turtle hermit?
Master Roshi: Yes that is correct.
Ying: And you're (looks at paper. Gawks.) 331!!?!??! That's OLD!!!!
Master Roshi: That is not old. I'm actually quite young. By the way, you're quite buxom…
Ying: (Gawks at him) YANG!!!!!!
(Cling! Cling! Cling!)
Yang: GET OUT!!! GET OUT!!! GET OUT!!! (She yells as she throws her yin yang disks)
Ying: Miasvdblfsdbhcjnyhrgsldjkhdsjhdjmnmninmmnmninm.
3rd Person Shigure Sohma
(Fruits Basket)
Yang: I see here that you are 27 years old. A little bit to old but we can deal.
Shigure: May I ask if you're in High School?
Yang: Yes I am in High School, but what does that have to do with anything?
Shigure: Just curious.
(Ying watches Shigure in hallway. Makes sure he doesn't try anything.)
Yang: Well so far so good. We'll call you.
Shigure: Good! Good!
Yang: Ying! Escort him out please.
(Ying comes into room.)
Shigure: Oh! There's two of you! Oh, that's going to change things a bit.
Ying: Change?
Shigure: Now I'll have to find time for both of you. Well, no. I guess it's okay for both of you to…
Ying: (Stares. Turns around, walks into back room, comes out with sword.) Let's kill him. (Points sword at Shigure)
Yang: I think I can fit time for that into my schedule.
Ying: (Glares at Shigure) Let's get him!
5 minutes later…
Ying: Get out and stay you perv!!!!
Shigure: High school girls, high school girls, all for me high school girls!!!
Yang: Hey punk! Go get different High School girls!
9,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999th Person
Miroku (No last name available)
(InuYasha)
Ying and Yang: Okay, this is the last person. If this person doesn't make it, then no one does. We'll cut him out!
Yang: Send him in…ohhhhh.
Ying: To many pervs…I've had more people ask me out on a date than showing me their acting skills. It's just too much.
Miroku: So ladies, what would you like me to do?
Ying: (Shuffles through mountains of paper work) Ummm, let's see, so you're Miroku. That's good, same name. And you're how old?
Yang: Me thinks he's nineteen.
Ying: (Throws down paper.) Too young!
Miroku: But ladies! You didn't even give me a chance.
Ying: Fine!
Yang: Ok. Well, can you act?
Miroku: Yes.
Ying: He's got the job. He's the only one who hasn't asked us on a date yet. And it's been 5 minutes.
Miroku: (Walks behind Ying and Yang and feels there bottoms.) Very nice.
Both: AAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ying: NO, NO, NOOO!!!! I take it back! OUT, OUT, OUT!!!!
Miroku: Will you bear my child?
Yang: Uhhhh…..
Ying: ………
Miroku: Since you are twins I cannot leave either of you out so if you don't mind we could…
Yang: NOOOO!!!!!
Ying: (Falls down in shock.) Where's my sword!!??? I want my sword!!!! I'm gonna kick his ass!!!
Miroku: Ladies, ladies there's enough of me to go around…
Ying: He doesn't get it!! He just doesn't get it!!!
Yang: Well… he does fit the part…
Ying: We just can't set a pervert like that loose around the studio…It's not fair to the others!
Yang: Then we'll just have to lock him up.
Miroku: Oh! I didn't realize you were into that kind of foreplay!
Ying: (Banging head against wall.) NO! NO! What did I do in a past life to deserve this?!?!?!? Just kill me now!!! I've had a good life. But this…this is unnatural!!!
And that's how we got our Miroku.
Ying: And now a few questions for our readers. First, who placed the peach on the floor so InuYasha could slip? Your choice. Second, why did Ying clobber Midako over the head with her spoon instead of her sword. I dunno…Thirdly…there is no third. Chapter 8 will come up soon, probably around Monday or Tuesday, or sometime next week. Stay tuned.