Sleep hadn't come easily for Brooke. She had tried just lying in bed and closing her eyes but it was of little or no use. She may have drifted off for an hour at the most and found that she rested more in the uncomfortable little chair by Lucas' bedside. But she'd had to come home to shower and change clothes and more importantly spend time with her daughter. Deb had done a remarkable job taking care of the little girl as well as cooking meals and keeping the loft clean. And she would there always helping and arranging during the times Brooke and Karen would breeze in and out.

Taking a brief moment to relax, Brooke sank on the sofa just trying to catch her breath. It had been a scary three days. There was no change in Luke's condition…he was no better (which was horrifying in itself) yet no worse (something that brought them slight comfort). The hint of a large brown envelope on the floor caught her eye. It was vaguely familiar as she recognized it as the packaged divorce papers she had signed days ago then forwarded to her lawyers. They must have been dropped on the floor when Lucas passed out. He must have been in the middle of signing them, she thought. Afraid to look at first, she finally sifted through the documents, hands shaking, breath coming in radical spurts. She flipped to the back and there in plain view was her signature scrawled above the printed version of her name, Brooke Rebecca Davis Scott. A few lines below was the designated space and computer printed name, Lucas Eugene Scott. Above it on the dotted line, there was no signature. Only the beginning of what looked like maybe the letter "L". Lucas had not signed the papers before his heart attack. Legally, they were still married.

"Off to the hospital?" Deb asked as she emerged with Harmony.

"Yeah. I better get back. Um, I think Karen will be here in a few hours."

"Brooke, honey you should try to eat before heading back. I baked some chicken…"

"I'm not hungry."

"You need to eat. I am so worried about you."

"I know and I appreciate it but I'll be fine, Deb. Really. I just wanted to thank you for what you're doing here. It means a lot and I don't know how I'd get through all this without you."

Deb gave her a warm smile as Harmony began to wail.

"What's the matter, Pretty Girl?" Brooke asked as she took her daughter.

The little girl continued to cry and clutch at her right ear.

"She has a bit of an ear infection so she's been cranky lately."

"An ear infection? What? I…"

"Relax. It's okay, Brooke. You left the pediatrician's name and number by the phone so I took her in yesterday. They gave her some medicine and everything should clear up in a few days. Your friend, Gordon, dropped by and drove us downtown so I wouldn't have to have her out in the cold waiting for a taxi. Don't worry. Harmony is going to be fine…aren't you sweetheart?"

The baby seemed to calm a little but it was obvious her fussing was not over for the day. Brooke cradled her close.

"Deb, first of all, thank you but I hate this. I really do. God, I don't know what to do. I have a sick, fussy baby that I have spent almost zero time with the last few days and there is a man, who according to those papers on the table over there, is still my husband and he is unconscious in a freaking hospital fighting for his life. I'm torn but I can't be in two places at once."

"Brooke, calm down. First of all, you are only one person and if you don't slow it down, you're gonna find yourself in the bed over there next to him. If you want to go back to the hospital again, then that's fine but I really think you should get more sleep and food in your stomach. And if you want to stay here that's fine too although Harmony and I will be fine."

Sighing, Brooke decided that she would spend a little more time at the loft. She missed her daughter so spent the next couple of hours taking care of her. She bathed, fed, gave her medicine and finally put her down. When she was convinced all would be well, she gave Deb a quick hug and headed back to the hospital. On her way out the door she stopped. A thought popped into her mind, something that just might be able to help Lucas.

She made the short drive back to the hospital and made the familiar trek to the ICU. Rounding the corner to his room, she couldn't make herself go inside. Her mind rewound back to one of the last times she had seen Lucas. It was the day he had come to Greenwich to take Harmony out for the day. They had talked and he had apologized for everything from his affair to not believing her the night they thought she was missing. But too much had happened and it was too late for apologies and excuses. He had told her he loved her and that he feared she was slipping away. She had told him that she was already gone. Now he was the one slipping away…literally. The situation was very real and very frightening and Brooke didn't know if she could handle much more. She grabbed the wall for support, fearing she just might collapse then and there.

"Brooke."

Getting her breath she looked up to see Nathan and Haley practically running towards her.

"You okay?" Nathan questioned as Brooked nodded a "yes". "Where's Luke's room?"

She pointed and he scurried off after giving her an empathetic pat on the shoulders.

"Oh honey, we got here as soon as we could", Haley said, hugging her. "The boys are back at the loft with Deb and Harmony. Are you okay? What happened?"

"He's going to die", Brooke wept. "Haley, Lucas is going to die and it's all my fault."

She was falling apart literally losing it. The heavy emotion of the days passed were finally weighing in and it proved too much for Brooke to take.

"Come on, sweetie", Haley ushered her. "Let's go have a cup of coffee in the cafeteria and talk."

Brooke was too out of it to even protest. The hospital cafeteria was nearly empty much to the girls' relief. They were able to snag a small table secluded in a corner.

"So how is his condition?" Haley asked after she had finally convinced Brooke to have hot tea and soup.

"His vitals are good and the operation went as well as they could have expected. Basically it's game of wait and wait some more."

"God, why does Luke have to be so freaking stubborn? Why couldn't he have just taken that heart test?" Haley asked herself out loud.

"I know. Part of me is so angry with him…"

"He's going to be okay. He's strong and he's a fighter. He is going to make it through this and then we can take turns beating his ass for scaring the hell out of us."

"All night I sat up watching Lucas last night. And I kept thinking I'm the one who can't wake up. This has to be some sort of dream. Because if this isn't a dream it's got to be some sort of punishment."

"Punishment for what, Brooke?"

"For being selfish. Haley, I found the divorce papers on the floor where Luke was. I had already signed them and he was preparing to but then…well, it must have happened. His signature is unfinished which means we're still married. Right before everything became finalized, he and I had a talk about everything that's happened to us. It was our first real conversation that didn't include screaming, cursing, hitting or whining. He apologized for everything and even though it can't change things…I, well, I sort of believe him, you know? Like I know he was being sincere. But it doesn't change things, Hales. I know we still love each other but I can't be with him like that again. Definitely not now, maybe not ever. And even though he was prepared to move on, I know deep down all he really wanted was for us to be a real family again. That dream was forever crushed when he got those papers, Haley. The doctor said excessive stress can cause the HCM patients to go into cardiac arrest. What if I did this to him?"

"Brooke, sweetie, no. Don't do this to yourself. This is not your fault, okay? Lucas has a genetic heart disorder. Now he is my best friend, he always has been and always will be but I could pummel him for not taking that damned test earlier. I begged him. He knew better. He knew the risks. And as much as I love him and as much as I am praying with everything that I have and am that he makes a full recovery, Brooke I am so angry with him for basically doing this to himself. You wanting a divorce is not to blame for him being in this hospital. You are the one that found him and called 911 and you've been by his side almost every waking moment since. You have nothing to feel guilty about."

"My mind agrees with you. I just wish my heart could see it that way. Hales, I've been doing a lot of thinking. Thinking about good times and the old Tree Hill days. Bonfires on the beach with you and Nathan and Peyton and Jake. God, we were so happy then. Life was simple and we were so in love. I…I can't even put into words how much I loved that boy. The things he did and said and the way he made me feel…nobody had ever treated me like that before. We used to lie in bed and I'd put my head on his chest and just listen to his heartbeat and it was the sweetest sound in the world. And he'd stroke my back and play with my hair and I'd look up into those blue eyes and see my whole future. I was so happy and my life was so complete and it was all because of him. He probably had no idea just what he'd done for me and I used to lie there and think of what I could do to make the rest of his life as perfect as he had made mine. How could I ever repay him for the love and the joy and the peace he brought to me. I…I just wanted to give him everything, you know? I guess I did a pretty crappy job, huh? What if I gave him death?"

The tears fell and Haley was there for comfort. It felt good for Brooke to let everything out that she had been holding in. She was tired of crying but that was one flood that needed to be released. Upon composing herself, she and Haley headed for the chapel, arm in arm.

"You know, I kind of understand where you're coming from, Brooke. I feel kind of guilty too."

"Why would you feel guilty?"

"Because I see all this destruction…two people I love very much who used to have everything and now they are just a couple of fractured, wounded, hurting, tortured souls. It kills me to see all the bad things that have happened to you and Lucas these past few months. Sometimes I feel like it's all my fault. Here I am with my wonderful husband and my perfect sons and beautiful house and successful career and all this money and other crap that I can't even enjoy because I feel like it was my big mouth that ruined it all for you and Lucas in the first place."

"That wasn't your fault, Haley. I never blamed you. What's done was already done and if you hadn't told me, I just would have found out a few days later from the tabloids. I…I'm glad you told. I know it wasn't easy for you but you did it because you're a good and honest person and because you love Lucas and me. I haven't always shown it but I respect you a lot, Haley. You have a wonderful but stressful life yet you handle it so well. You've always been able to balance the famous musician, the loving and perfect wife, and the incredible mommy that you are. At times I was a little envious I admit."

"Of me?" Haley laughed sincerely. "Are you kidding me? You're Brooke Davis Scott, head cheerleader, beauty queen, fashion icon, bubbly, happy, confident, sexy…gosh, you're everything. And you're the strongest person I know. Heck, you have to be for everything you've endured this past year. And no matter how bad it got, you always came up smelling like a rose. If it were me, I would have jumped off a bridge by now or at least committed myself to the nearest mental ward. But not you. Not my Tigger. You hold your head high and you keep on trucking on and you get through the bad times with grace and dignity. You were my idol back when we were in high school and you still are."

The sisters in law and love gave each other a small smile before entering the chapel. Haley immediately sank to her knees, head bowed, arms folded and began to pray at the altar. Brooke took a seat in the back pew, fidgeting with her hands.

"Hello? Are you there, God? It's me…Brooke Scott. I know lately I've only come to You when I want something and considering everything that has happened, that's been pretty often. This time is no exception but it's pretty important. It's not for me. It's for my daughter and for Haley and Karen and for Luke. Just…please help him, okay? I know I have no right to ask anything of You but please, please take care of him. We all love him very much and we're not ready to lose him just yet. So if You would, just make it all better. And all that other stuff I asked for before that was for me…well, never mind. I'd give up any and everything in the world if you just keep Harmony and Lucas safe. Take care of them before you take care of me. Okay? Um, thanks for listening. Amen."

She and Haley joined hands and walked back to Luke's room. They could barely see him or Nathan for the mess of flowers, balloons and stuffed animals.

"What's all this?"

"The fans", Nathan managed to smile. "Luke's got a lot of people out there pulling for him."

Brooke was touched by the overwhelming outpour of support.

"That's very sweet. Um, we'll get the names of everyone and make sure we get thank you notes out. We'll keep what we can and donate the flowers to the elderly patients here and the stuffed animals to the pediatric wing."

"Luke would like that", Nathan nodded.

"Where's Karen?"

"She took a cab back to the loft. Wanted to get a quick shower and check on the kids. She'll be back."

Brooke nodded and pulled up a chair next to the bed. Hours later, Haley had dozed off in a sleeping Nathan's arms on the small sofa by the door. Remembering here idea earlier, Brooke grabbed her bag and pulled out the blanket. It was what she had brought from home earlier. It was Harmony's blanket, soft to the touch and it smelled just like her. Gently Brooke rubbed the blanket across Luke's body and face. She pulled out a picture of father and daughter clowning around at Central Park.

"That's your daughter, Luke", she whispered. "Harmony needs you. Our little girl needs you to open your eyes. We all need you."

Sighing she carefully folded the blanket and placed it on his chest along with the picture. Silent tears fell as she rested her weary head on it and fell fast asleep.