Chapter 12: Of Reasons and Farewells

He felt old and tired standing in front of his parents, with fists clenched as if ready to do battle. Within him, a hollowness grew with each passing second.

His parents shared a look of puzzlement before returning their attention to him.

"Sasuke, did you want something?"

His voice was clearer and tougher than he had imagined it would be. As was his nature, he went straight to the point, "I didn't come to the Land of the Dead to see you."

This was the end then. He looked at them, clutched them to his heart, and then banished them. In the process, he emptied himself of all emotion. He could not feel. Not now. Later, perhaps, he would return to the memory of leaving them. But for now, it would be easier if he pretended that there was no pain.

"I came to save someone who's not supposed to be here."

Confusion began to spread across their faces, but he knew they would see in between the lines eventually and guess what he was really saying.

He hardened himself, his voice, his expression. But it was still difficult to keep talking when every word he said was a forceful blow against the fragile dream he had built up. Every word would lead to a crack in the illusion until with enough damage, it would tumble down into a heap of nothing. The shadow had caused the first crack and now, it was his turn. He could not stop until the dream was destroyed completely.

"The Hokage performed a jutsu, temporarily severing me from my body so that I could be here and look for her--"

"What?" his mother interjected nervously, "Severed you from your body? Sasuke… What do you mean, Sasuke?"

But his father remained gravely silent so that Sasuke knew that he knew. Abruptly, his mother covered her mouth to hold back a cry and that signified that she had finally understood as well. They had known that they were dead, but they hadn't know that... he... was...

"Her name is Sakura. Haruno, Sakura," he continued, thinking of his memories of her. If he had looked in a mirror, he would have seen the unconscious way his eyes softened and how his mouth neither frowned nor scowled for he didn't seem quite so angry or sad when he spoke of her.

But his parents saw the change and saw hope for their son despite what he was saying.

"I don't really want to go…" Something within him twisted so painfully that he almost lost composure. Almost. Inevitably, the familiar weight of burden was seeping slowly back into his being, "But I have to."

"She's part of my team. I have to bring her back because she's an important part of the village and because the other members of my team are counting on me and because…"

He paused then, not knowing what else to say.

And in all truth, there really wasn't anything else to say.

The dream was in shambles now. Staying was no longer an option. But despite the bitter loneliness that this wrought, he had the feeling there was something else to cling to now. It was easier than he had imagined. There was no training involved, no mission, no endless hours of thinking of revenge.

All he had to do was look within himself, past all the shadows and into his soul, to find what was hidden between the two. So he looked, and in some secret place that was neither dark or light, the answer had Naruto's voice, Icha Icha Paradise, and above all, the greenest eyes he had ever seen.

Ah…. So that's what it was. After all those times of pushing them away and keeping them at a distance to protect them… In the end, they had burrowed so deep within him that he could not erase them without erasing a part of himself.

Especially her. Her smile, her kindness, her strength of heart and ready forgiveness… He never would've imagined that he could ever need such things, such a person so much. Itachi had taken everything away and she, by being everything, had given it all back…

"Sasuke?" his mother said hesitantly. They were waiting for him to finish his explanation.

Aa… so there was more to say, after all.

He looked at the two ghosts and because he could lie no longer to them, gave them the third reason,

"…and because I love her."

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"I knew you would come to your senses sooner or later," Naruto muttered, noticing his teammate's slight increase in chakra. It wasn't much, but it was enough: if Uzumaki Naruto ever thrived on anything besides ramen, it was hope.

The boy who wanted to be Hokage walked over to his teacher and kneeled, placing a hand lightly on Sakura's still shoulder.

"Let me help," he said, not waiting for a response. His chakra flowed out easily, like a trickle that became a stream that charged into a powerful river. Better yet, he had an abundant supply. Having the Kyubi as a resident in his body certainly had its benefits. He watched eagerly as the paleness faded ever so slightly from the pink-haired girl's face.

Kakashi removed his hand, ready to take the offered break. He nodded his thanks before drifting off, his head leaning back against a nearby wall.

Naruto smiled. Bending lower so that his head was next to hers, he whispered as reassuringly as he could for he was certain that she would hear, "Everything will be okay, Sakura-chan. He'll bring you back. I'm sure of it."

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This was where they had come to, when he could no longer pretend the barrier between the dead and the living didn't exist.

"My time is running out. I need to leave."

"…We understand." His father cleared his throat to add gruffly, "Good luck."

"Noone's ever done what you're attempting…" His mother started in a doubtful tone. Then, with what looked like effort, her demeanor lightened and she smiled encouragingly, "But if anyone can do it, I believe it's you. After all, you're an Uchiha."

Sasuke's lips lifted slightly as he thought about how strong his parents were even in death. They did not discourage, did not demand why he was saving her instead of them, only smiled. And that was enough to give him courage.

But had he looked closer, he would've noticed the way the tears sparkled in his mother's eyes and the way his father's hand was not completely still.

"Arigatou," the departing son said, "For the dinner."

So formal it was. Even as a kid, he had been reluctant to let his emotions take over because Itachi had always frowned at that. But now, what he wouldn't give to throw himself into their arms and hug these dear people close as he had seen so many children do in his lonely childhood.

Instead, he took a step backward and bowed. And in the corner of his mind, he thought, Good. At least this time I get a proper farewell.

And ironically, his voice was steady while his heart cracked. It would take a while to mend, he knew. But it would mend, "Good-bye."

"Good-bye, Sasuke… We love you."

He nodded, savoring the words. Walking out the door, he closed it behind him and started towards the path that was opening up into gray shadows.

Behind him, the house faded in its color, wavered, and then disappeared. It may have looked like a raindrop evaporating into the air or a snowflake being devoured by the hot, red sun.

But this was all meaningless to Uchiha Sasuke for he never looked back.

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Watching the back of her son grow more and more distant, it was then that she remembered it. The simple, haunting melody that she had sung to him when he was still an infant, when she could still hold him tenderly in her arms and protect his happiness from the contamination of the world.

She couldn't protect him anymore. She realized that she hadn't been able to for a long time. But she could still sing that lullaby and the words left her mouth the way she wouldn't allow the tears to leave her eyes.

"You are my sunshine… My only sunshine… You make me happy when skies are gray…"

Her husband's arms came around her gently and he said, "At least we had a chance to see him, right? He's really grown so much…"

"You'll never know, dear, how much I love you…"

He sighed, a sound of aching sadness, "I just wish… I wish we could have been there to watch him… Wouldn't that have been nice?"

The song stopped as the singer was overcome. She turned to clutch him close, burying her face in his neck.

"Yes," she said, knowing without seeing that their son had disappeared from them into the shadows, "That would have been nice."