Chapter 21: Of Empty Houses and Empty Arms

Everything was so… so routine.

He was backing away, his young mind numb with fear and then alive with anger.

He was screaming and charging his brother, getting kicked hard in the stomach, and then falling limp to the ground.

He was staring into the dead face of the man that was his father, feeling the blood as it seeped into his clothes.

"Why?" he heard himself asking.

"Because they were a means to measure myself," Itachi told him and ahhh, in the same cold manner that he had said them the first time. But it wasn't really Itachi, he knew. His young mind did not know this was fake, did not know that this house was just a copy of the same thing. His ten-year-old self was becoming crushed under the weight of this experience.

But his real self could not have cared less. This was not fresh pain, this was an old scab that had been picked at too often for it to remain a scar.

"No, that's not what I mean. Why…" his little voice cracked, "…why don't I feel sad?"

This house of blood, of murder, of a past that he could no longer remember meant nothing.

Sasuke stood up and looked at his surroundings quietly, at the place that used to be his home. Then he met the eyes of his enemy and said, "You're not him."

Itachi, as if he had been struck, took a step backward, "What?"

"You said I was born here, you said I dreamed about their deaths to keep strong. You knew that I never wanted to forget this night. He thought I wanted to forget, that he always had to remind me. My brother, that is… Itachi never knew that I wanted to forever remember it."

It didn't hurt to say his name anymore. None of these words brought him anything. Not even guilt.

"Have you forgotten your past, Sasuke?" The icy, hard face disappeared to reveal his rotting twin, the thing that had once been him, "Have you forgotten who these people are?"

Sasuke bit his lip, trying to muster up any emotions of loss that he knew he was supposed to feel. But nothing came, not even the slightest inkling of sorrow. That man was his father, that woman his mother. Yet, even as they lay as bloody victims before his eyes, he could not understand why they were so precious.

What exactly had he sacrificed? That old man had taken his happy memories of the past, but in doing so, his grief and need for vengeance had also been stripped away. He kneeled, touched the white cheeks of his parents, and bowed his head, "Forgive me…"

That was all he could give them now. An apology.

The corpse was wrong. He had not forgotten the past; he had given it up. The door was in front of him, but this time, he did not run to it, half-crazed with fear. But the sounds of his steps as he moved toward it were equally loud in his mind. Step, step… It was, in the end, just another house… Step, step… They were, in the end, just some people…

"Do you think you're free?"

He stopped. Free?

The corpse snarled from behind, "Do you think just because your memories have been stolen that you can escape this place so easily? We both know that the price for your sins will still weigh heavy. You cannot leave that man alive. It is your destiny to kill him, just as you are destined to come back."

The thing was right. This building, these deaths, may have been reduced to insignificance but Itachi, with all his terrible power, was not just another enemy. No, freedom had never been an option.

"And when you do return, we'll see how many doors are open to you."

If Sasuke had not lacked so much of it, he might have taken the time to feel threatened, maybe even a little scared. But someone was waiting for him and she meant more than all the empty houses in the world.

"…We'll see," Sasuke echoed, walking out.

wwwwww

When he stepped outside, the house vanished. There was the faintest sense of déjà vu of walking out the door that he dismissed easily. His corpse was gone, though he did not doubt that they would meet again. Looking around, he realized he was at the bottom of the lake and that, to his supreme fortune, the person he was looking for was only a few feet away.

Sakura seemed to be strolling aimlessly, pink hair flowing gently about her, suspended in the water.

He ran toward her, as fast as the river would allow. It was difficult moving his legs, for they felt like they had been loaded down with four hundred pounds of lead, but he persisted until he was close enough to grab her wrist.

"Sakura," he gasped, "Are you alright?"

She stared at his hand and the fingers wrapped around her wrist with not the slightest sign of interest. He waited anxiously for her to look back up but when she finally did, he regretted it for the lack of recognition was jarring. His grip slackened as he stepped back abruptly to meet the eyes of the girl that was and was not Sakura.

He felt something die within him when she asked him dully as to whom he was and did they know each other or something?

"Not that it matters," she added in a blank, unfeeling tone, "Nothing really matters… down here…"

"I'm Sasuke," he managed to mutter, the introduction sapping him of his energy for it felt as if it had been repeated too many times, "I'm here to take you back."

"Take me back? I can't leave. I have to stay here," and with that, she began to walk away.

Her coldness stunned him. He who had always been used to her adoration for so long was dismissed as an insignificant stranger. He who had selfishly left her so many times now watched as she turned the tables on him. For one frightening moment, as her back drew farther and farther away into the night river, he did not know what to do.

"Aren't you… aren't you even going to ask 'back to where'?" he finally said.

Her feet did not lose their momentum, "But it doesn't matter… Like I said, down here, nothing—"

"Don't give me that bullshit," he said roughly, his anger catching up to him as he caught up to her. He thought of those that were waiting and depending on him, "There are people there who care about you. Who love you. Who want you to return. And you say that none of it matters? That they don't matter?"

"Yes," it was such a simple answer that it horrified him and she was still walking, "They're unimportant."

"So… you're just going to forget all of them," Sasuke stated almost disbelievingly.

"Yes."

"I gave up memories for you…" he whispered, "and you'll just give yours up… for nothing?"

She didn't answer.

"You're going to forget me and Kakashi and Ino and your parents… You're going to forget the time we went to the Hidden Mist Village and trained together… You're going to forget how we survived the Forest of Death together…"

She was slowing down. He could see her hesitating, her shoulders bunching up with tension. Whatever he was doing, it seemed to be working.

"You're going to forget your childhood…"

His voice seemed to have a mind of its own. It spoke far more sadly and gently than he had ever heard it. Who was this person whose heart could be heard in his words? Was this the true him? Not stopping to marvel, he urged it on,

"You're going to forget your family and your best friend…"

Her steps had become so small and the intervals in between them so infinite that she seemed to be moving in slow motion.

"…and your teacher and your teammates and your home…"

Smaller and smaller…

"They're not--"

"And Naruto?" Sasuke interrupted and she stiffened, utterly still, "Will you forget him, too? The dobe who risked himself so many times for you? Who almost died and gave up his dream for you? You would forget him?"

Her right foot lurched forward almost defiantly. Then it stopped and she fell to her knees, clutching her sides. Her whole frame trembled as if about to break.

He rushed to her side, "Sakura, get up. We're going back now."

She didn't react. He felt his mind sink into horror as her image became increasingly transparent. When their eyes met, he saw a distance that horrified him. She was leaving in some way that he could not understand. Perhaps, out of kindness to ease his fears, she reached for his hand. But when her hand touched his skin, he hardly felt its weight.

"Never," she murmured, "Not Naruto." Her fingers grasped his tenderly, "And not you, either, Sasuke-kun. Not anyone…" Then, in wonder, she said, "I know your name… I think…I remember now. Not a lot, but the memories… Some of them, how strange, the old man's given them back now… "

"Sakura, stand up."

"I live in Konoha… There was a field… of sunflowers… There was rain… and you were there… I remember now…"

He didn't understand what she was saying or what was happening. He only knew that she was fading. The pink in her hair was going colorless and her skin was paling drastically.

It didn't make any sense. If she was remembering, why was she fading?

"Sakura, please… just stand up."

But she wasn't listening. Her head had bowed solemnly and she was talking to herself solemnly, "He was wrong… Love can't be death… because real love doesn't die… so long as we remember and treasure it, it will always live…"

He took her into his arms. She didn't feel solid. He suppressed his panic. If he hurried, would he be able to carry her back?

Sakura looked up at him, questioning, "Am I right?"

Too fast. Everything was happening too fast. Already, she was too light, like a feather weighing nothing. She was disappearing and this time, he couldn't do anything. He couldn't save her.

"Real love doesn't die, right, Sasuke-kun?"

He was almost annoyed, too scared to be sensitive. He was the last person she should ask. Didn't she know that already?

But one look at her desperate face, so trusting and anxious that he could not help but reassure her.

"Yes," he assented quietly, "I don't think it does."

"So if I'm remembered, in a way, I'll still be alive."

She needed him to agree again, she wanted his acknowledgement so badly, he could tell. So he nodded slowly, painfully, and said hoarsely, "Yes."

Why wasn't there another way? Why didn't he have another chance--

"Then… Sasuke-kun, will you remember me?"

He couldn't speak, something had lodged in his throat and it felt like his heart. But the answer was there, without words. Like it had always been between them.

Always.

She smiled, a smile so natural and calm that it felt like he was back in the hospital room and she was thanking him for both staying and leaving her behind.

I won't hold you back anymore.

And then he was by himself again, his arms holding nothing.

He didn't know how long he sat there at the bottom of that black river. He only knew that at one point, he had held up his hands and looked at them, dimly noting that they were shaking. But for most of the period, his thoughts had merged into one line that repeated itself to the point of exhaustion and beyond.

He had failed.

wwwwww

Sunshine, rain.

This was her heaven, not that ugly, empty field.

Here, she was at peace, feeling the lips of one and the supporting hand of the other.

Oh, she was happy here, with the two boys she loved most in the world…

A/N Ok, so I got a little corny. And I ended at yet another cliffhanger. Before you guys gasp and scream at me, let me say that this is not the end. Yes, and let's leave it at that. cackles

Omake 1:

Sasuke: (horrified whisper) Sakura... you don't remember me?

Sakura: No.

Sasuke: (whines) But I came all this way and suffered all this angst and gave up my vengeance and my past... just for you!

Sakura: Ummm... Why?

Sasuke: (blushes prettily) Because... uh... eh... well, you know... I... you...

Sakura: (walks away)

Sasuke: (still blushing) I don't know why... but I... uh... you... feelings??

Omake 2:

Sakura: Sasuke... will you remember me?

Sasuke: (breaks out in Sarah Mclaughlan) I will remember you... will you remember me? Don't let your life pass you by...

Sakura: Hey, don't do that. I'm hanging by a moment here with you.

...As you can prolly see, I need practice writing omake. :(