Disclaimer: I don't own Swat Kats.
Thanks to my constant reviewers. Enjoy the new chapter.
The rest of the day passes without any more earth shattering events. I stay in the office doing paperwork while Alex works on the cars as they come in. Fate is smiling on us because the day is pretty slow and Alex is able to keep up with the work load without killing anyone or breaking anything.
I can hear him closing up the shop and making his way back to the office where I have attempted to bury myself under a mountain of paperwork. I can't see him as he enters but I know he's grinning as he makes his way towards the desk and peers over the pile at me.
"You have been busy I see." He jokes lightly. I smirk up at him.
"I needed something to keep my paws busy and all this paperwork just jumped on my desk. It was quite a shoving match to see who would die a quick death under my pen first." Alex laughs quietly at my words before becoming serious.
"How are you doing?" Now it's my turn for my smile to fall.
"Better then I was but still pretty lousy." I look down at the form in my paws. "I really hurt Chance pretty bad when I didn't go back didn't I." The statement is not a question. I've known Chance since middle school. Of course I hurt him, we were best friends. Alex sighs and runs a hand through his hair.
"I'm not going to lie to you Jake. He didn't look the best. He was really upset when I told him I didn't know you. He looked like a fighter though." I smile sadly as I reflect on Chance. I may have been the brains of our friendship but Chance was my rock. He kept me going when I didn't know if I could keep going, especially after the crash and all the trouble we got into for that. I had felt like my life was ruined but Chance kept me going.
If Chance has any idea what I went through then I should let him know I'm still alive. Not many kats can live through what Dark Kat did to me and still maintain themselves as something other then a babbling mass. I got lucky I guess.
With a sigh I stand and head towards the small employee lounge to grab my stuff from the locker. Alex follows me and watches as I pull my jacket on.
"You are a different kat then you were when you first arrived here." I turn back to him and listen as he continues. "You look nothing like the kat that arrived here a couple months ago. You've thickened out, grown the hair, and changed your image completely. I like what you have become Jake." I blush slightly.
"You didn't know me before." Is all I say.
"But I saw a picture of you Jake. Chance had one of the two of you when he came in earlier today. The picture looked nothing like you. I wouldn't have recognized you as that kat if you hadn't told me about Chance in advance." I'm a little shocked by that comment.
Have I really changed that much? I ask myself as I look myself over in the mirror on the inside of my locker door. I'm a lot thinner then I was before my capture, my hair has grown out, I hadn't really noticed just how much till now and my style is different. The dark clothing does wonders to ward off people and I feel safe in this color. The wrist bands also add to the "don't mess with me image". I look back at Alex.
"I guess I have changed haven't I." He nods.
"Few kats go through what you went through without being changed. You lived through it and did what you had to in order to pick up the pieces of your life." He pauses and looks me over. "I think you should go back to Megakat City and put the past to rest completely. As long as you stay here without closure then you are not going to be able to move past what happened." I stare at the wall past Alex and sigh.
"Is it really that easy? Is going back to Megakat City and announcing that I'm alive really going to help set my life back on track? I thought I had done that already when I picked myself up and started living again." Alex agrees with a small smile.
"Yeah you did that Jake. It's great that you did that but you have to put this thing with Chance behind you if you truly want to move on. If you don't part of you is always going to feel guilty about it and you won't be able to grow past it." I am in the process of closing my locker but his words stop me.
"Guilt? Is guilt what's really holding me back?" I had never thought about that before. Now that I am thinking about it I realize that what Alex is saying is true. I do feel guilty about leaving Chance. I try to rationalize why I feel guilty because I did have a good reason to leave but I just can't do it. I don't even realize it when my jacket slips from my numb fingers and Alex moves forward to pick it up.
He looks at me with concern as I snap out of it and take the jacket back from him. "You are right." I say and he looks at me in confusion. "I am feeling guilty about leaving." I slip my jacket on and zip it up before continuing.
"I think I'm heading home. I have some things to think about." Alex nods as we make our way to the door of the shop and head outside. The cool evening air sends chills down my spine as I watch Alex lock up. He looks over at me and waves me toward the back where his car is parked.
"I'll take you home." He offers. "You are way to thin and you will freeze to death if I leave you out here in the cold." A grin spreads across my face and he smirks at me as we both start running toward the back of the building and the car. This time he beats me and I tease him about being closer to the car when we started. He doesn't deny it as he unlocks the doors and we climb in.
The ride back to my apartment is spent joking back and forth about something or another. I tease him about Rei and he blushes slightly about it. He doesn't deny it though. He likes her I can tell and I encourage him to tell her so. This causes an even deeper blush to spread across his face as he tells me that if I keep badgering him about it then he will have to do so just to shut me up.
We arrive at my apartment building in good spirits. I get out of the car and Alex waits till I have the building door open and am safely inside before taking off. I am just lucky enough to catch the elevator as it opens. As I'm waiting for the other kats to exit a she-kat hurries up beside me. I know her because she lives down the hall from me. She's a sweet kat who is young, energetic and in to journalism. She waves to me as we enter the elevator and during the ride up to our floor we talk about how our respective days went.
As the elevator door opens we go our separate ways and I head down to my apartment. The TV is still on as I walk in and I glance over to see the weather-kat listing off the forecast for the night and tomorrow. I drop my keys on the table and put my cell phone on the charger. The ball cap goes back on the peg with my jacket beside it and I settle on the sofa to relax. I stretch and take the wrist bands off. They may hide the scars but the hinder the movement of my wrists. When the weather is over I head for the kitchen to make up a little dinner.
I eat while I watch the news and eventually start to drift off. As much as I would like to make my way into the bedroom I just don't have the energy and end up falling asleep on the sofa. I awake several hours later to find the apartment lit only by the flickering of the TV. With a sign I pull myself up and shut it off plunging the room into darkness.
The streetlights outside barely provide enough light as I make my way to the bedroom and fall onto the bed without changing. A shiver passes down my spine as I lay there in the dark and think over the day.
I have to go back to Megakat City. I have to set things right with Chance. I should but I don't want to. I've got a good life here. Alex is right, you are not going to move past this without closure. I roll over onto my back and stare up at the ceiling. My mind is working overtime as I weigh the pros and cons of staying here versus going back home. I know that nightmares aren't going to keep me up tonight; instead it is going to be my indecision. Despite that I'm so tired that I end up drifting off anyway.
I awake to the buzzing of my alarm. After showing and getting dressed I head into work and it's another day like yesterday. I stay in the office and finish the remaining paperwork while Alex works on the cars. I know that Chance is going back to Megakat City this afternoon so I'm not too worried about him showing up again. Despite that I know I should go find his hotel and make myself known. I don't though and the knowledge that I let the perfect opportunity to see my best friend in a place where I am comfortable eats at me.
A week passes before I finally snap under the pressure. My dreams have been haunted with nightmares about what Chance has probably been going through and I just can't handle them anymore. I have to see him so I can make peace with myself.
The night that I finally snapped I had called Alex in the middle of the night in tears. He had been sympathetic and understanding. That's when I told him I was going back. He had been surprised by my sudden conviction but encouraged me to go for it. He then told me that he was hanging up and that I could talk to him at work the next morning like a sane kat. There had been a hint of mirth in his voice and I knew he was trying to joke around with me.
The morning after I made that call I arrange to fly into Megakat City on Saturday morning. I let Alex know when I come into work and he in turn arranges for his mother to meet me at the airport.
Saturday morning dawns bright and cool as Alex drives me to the airport. He can tell I'm nervous about doing this. I haven't been to Megakat City since I left it over four months ago and the thought of going back to the city I once called home is making my stomach do back-flips. Alex can tell because he pulls me aside and tells me that everything will be here for me if things don't work out. The back-flips ease a little as I reaffirm that I will have a place to call home if things don't go well with Chance.
The voice over the loudspeaker is announcing the first call for my flight and Alex pulls me into a hug and whispers a few words of encouragement. He then pushes me toward the ticket counter. I hand my ticket to the kat behind the counter and take a deep breath before I start making my way to the plane.
I know there is no turning back now and steel myself for the difficult task that lies ahead of me. After nearly a year I'll be coming face to face with my best friend. It's something I need to do while at the same time it is something I will never be ready to do it. I've taken the first step though and hopefully it will be smooth sailing from here on.