Disclaimer: -ahem- "I own Harry Potter." random voice from the crowd: "Yeah, and pigs can fly." My response: "Two words. Wingardium Leviosa." Thus, I convincingly prove my insanity and anything I say turns to complete rubbish. The end. Oh, yeah, and I stole-er-used-a line from Pirates of the Carribean.

This Is It!

The Marauders looked down at the flabby piece of parchment, marveling at their handy-work.

"I do believe that this is the greatest piece of parchment we've ever enchanted," Sirius said proudly.

"Except, of course, for the Map," James corrected. The other three nodded in agreement.

The thing was quite an ingenious bit of work. They had cast so many protective spells on the parchment, some of them of their own invention, that the only people who would be able to read it were the Marauders themselves and their children or descendants. It would appear in some seemingly-random hiding place for the child to find when he (or she, as the case wouldn't be) needed it most. There had been much argument over that; Sirius kept insisting that it should be found directly before first year, when it could be used for the longest time, but James was adamant in keeping it 'hidden' until the descendant really needed it.

Along with the protection charms, they added the charm they used on the Map. Unless the onlooker pointed his wand at the parchment and muttered the password ('I solemnly swear that I am up to no good'), the list would simply insult or praise the person as it saw fit. Not one of the Marauders doubted the cleverness of the 'heir of the parchment,' and they trusted that he would be able to figure out the password.

Furthermore, (this was James's idea) they placed a Secret Charm on the list. Whoever read the list would not be able to divulge its secrets to any Mrs. Marauder, whether present or future. James's eyes were glinting madly when he suggested this, and the other three knew that there was no way of stopping him-not that they wanted to, they wouldn't want any of their girlfriends finding about this list either.

Sirius pinned the list to the wall, and they all got one last look at it before it vanished; none of them knew where it went, most probably to the best hiding place for the time being. The final list showed in gleaming red letters the 8 rules the group had come up with:

8 Simple Rules for Being a Marauder's Son

8. The Rules Rule

The only rules that apply to you are these ones. As we Marauders like to say, "Rules are made to be broken, so why not break them?" So don't even think about going through school without breaking at least one rule. The only rules you can't break are these. Besides, these are more like guidelines, anyways.

7. Prankers are Rulers

As the Marauders were legendary for their pranks, there is the necessity to continue the tradition. You must pull no less than an average of 1 prank per year. Now, that's only 7 pranks, so there is no reason to not succeed with this rule. Plus, we've hexed this parchment to prank you if you don't get this rule finished.

6. Speaking of Minimums

It would be degrading to find that the descendent of a Marauder failed to receive at least 2 detentions each year. Please do not disappoint us.

5. Rule of Reputations

The Marauders have a reputation of being good with the ladies. We see no reason for this reputation to diminish. Do keep up the standards, will you?

4. Snivellus

Associating with a certain nameless, greasy-haired, hooked-nose Snivellus is completely unacceptable and unforgivable. If you want to be friends with said Snivellus, it is suggested that you run away and change your name.

3. Code of Loyalty

Absolute loyalty among friends is the only way to go. Lying and/or deceiving is not to be tolerated. Reserve those nasty things to be used in regards to rule Snivellus.

2. Secrecy

You are not to divulge the contents to anybody, save your most trusted friends. DO NOT TELL YOUR PARENTS.

1. The Best for Last

The most important part of a Marauder's philosophy is to have fun in life. Never let anybody stand in your way of enjoying yourself, be it an annoying classmate or a threatening dark lord. Live your life to the fullest, and above all, remember-nobody is too scary or intimidating to prank.

Reviews please? Thanks, and I hope you like!