Several hours later Trance was quite pleased with the results of her little trick. Dylan, Beka, and Harper were all much more relaxed and open to each other than normal. Like all intoxicated people they suddenly felt the need to share all their honest feelings, their troubles and worries as well as their life philosophies, interspersed with off color jokes of course. Rev Bem had returned to the table as well and once Trance let him in on her joke found the situation as amusing as she did. He looked over at Harper who had been quiet for a new record of three minutes and twenty three seconds. "Harper, is something troubling you?"

Harper suddenly threw his hands up towards the ceiling. "My greatest creation, my Glorious Heritage goddess made flesh, the woman of my dreams and love of my life, Rommie. I wish she was here. There are so many things I want to tell her. Rommie, where are you Rommie?!?" Harper's head thumped down on the table.

Beka was highly amused. Harper was by far the drunkest, and had obviously passed into the melancholy stage. "Harper you idiot, she's on the ship. Where we left her just a few hours ago, where else would she be?"

"Of course! I have to call her. I need to talk to her, to confess how I feel, to find out if she could ever love me!"

Trance watched Harper fumble with the communicator with a confused look on her face. "Beka, what is he talking about? He tells Rommie he loves her all the time and she always tells him she doesn't love him that way."

"Trance you are about to witness an ancient Earth custom called 'drunk dialing'. Always a bad idea for the person doing the calling, usually funny for the rest of us. Just watch."

Harper finally managed to get the communicator right side up and signaled Rommie. She responded quickly, "Yes Harper, what do you want?" Harper just stared at her, temporarily forgetting why he had called her. "Harper what's wrong, where's Dylan?" Dylan didn't even hear her as he was preoccupied trying to explain why the Commonwealth must be restored to a poor woman who had only wanted to ask the captain to dance. The mention of Dylan's name set Harper off though.

"Sure, Dylan you ask about. It's always Dylan isn't it?!? Captain Terrific, Babe Magnet of the Universe strikes again. Never mind that is was Seamus Z. Harper that lovingly created you, gave you the ability to love in every sense of the word, who fixes you every time Mr. Wonderful's plans get you blown up. I can't take it any more, I don't need this, I don't deserve this! Goodbye Rommie, nice knowin' ya!" Harper had a glimpse of an astonished Rommie as he broke the signal. He stared at the screen for a moment, then began lightly pounding his head on the table. "Crap, crap, crap…"

Beka patted the top of his head and tried not to laugh too much. "It'll be ok Seamus, I'll explain to Rommie. Look I'll call her right now." She took the communicator from Harper and signaled Rommie. A very confused Rommie answered and immediately began questioning Beka. Meanwhile the woman Dylan had trapped finally escaped leaving the captain free to turn his attention, such as it was at this point, back to his crew. Rev Bem attempted to explain to Dylan why the engineer was giving himself a concussion while Beka was describing the physical sensation and lowered inhibitions of intoxication to the avatar. "Well Dylan, Harper was trying to explain… why yes Dylan that is quite an attractive female but I don't think she wants to hear about the Commonwealth…Harper had difficulty articulating his feelings to Rommie so Beka is trying to… Dylan please pay attention, she doesn't care about your force lance either…Harper stop hitting your head against the table, if the Divine wants you to have a concussion he will drop a rock on your head. Oh I give up, Trance please help me here, this was your idea after all."

"I think you're right Rev, it's probably time to go." Trance signaled the waitress to bring them some water and paid the tab. Harper finally stopped knocking his head against the table and laid it on Trance's shoulder, "You still love me don't you Trance?" The purple girl smiled down at him, "Of course I do Harper, now drink your water so we can go."

"Ok mommy."

Beka finally finished talking with Rommie. "My work here is done. Rommie promises to let us all back on the ship. She's more curious than angry now. She said she wishes she could experience intoxication herself. Hey lover boy, couldn't you program something so Rommie could feel tipsy?"

Harper became somewhat alert again at the words "program" and "Rommie." "Well actually, being the universally acclaimed genius that I am I did design a program once. I hoped it would get Rommie in the mood… Did I just say that out loud? Heh, heh, yeah anyway, the only problem is in order to make it feel real it can't be a regular program, it has to be more like a virus, which means I need Rommie to lower her firewall to let it in. Otherwise splat goes the virus. And Rommie will only lower her firewall with Dylan's permission, and I figured he would never let his warship get drunk, soooo… umm, Dylan can Rommie lower her firewall?"

Dylan was feeling benevolent, and that coupled with the fact that he hadn't really followed the conversation prompted him to contact Rommie. "Rommie, listen, go ahead and do what Harper says. About that firewall thing or whatever it was. Don't worry, it'll be fine."

Harper was now bouncing in his seat a lot like Trance had been bouncing in the Maru earlier. Seeing Rommie uninhibited was one of his private fantasies. He completed the upload to Rommie and began bugging Trance about returning to the Andromeda. Trance was trying to round the others up to go, but Dylan had wandered off in search of the woman he had seen earlier, and Rev Bem was trying to convince Beka that she didn't really want to bring the large muscular man she had started dancing with back to the Maru. By the time Trance and Rev Bem had everyone headed for the Maru Harper had managed to get another beer, Beka was really wishing she could bring that man back to the Maru, and Dylan appeared to be dictating his thesis "How to restore the Commonwealth with a single ship and 6 crew members in less that 5 years". Trance had no idea relaxing could be so much work.

A/N: So to finish or not to finish? I've planned out a drunken ride home chapter, written most of a midnight snacks chapter, and planned a waking up the next morning chapter. Thanks again!