Colors brighter than I've ever seen, more wired than I've ever been.

(Wonderful Way to Go – New Model Army)

"You wanted to go on the highway, right?" Bobby nodded eagerly, wondering why it was that he felt so strangely impatient with Alex's driving. Usually, he liked his partner's driving. It was certainly better than his. Tonight, though, she simply didn't seem to be moving fast enough. "Bobby?" Alex was turning left, slowing as she neared a Burger King. "Do you mind if I pick up a cup of coffee? You may not need to sleep, but I'm a little tired here."

"Okay." The tall detective leaned back against his seat. Alex hopped out of the car and hurried in; a few moments later she returned, two cups of coffee in hand. Bobby leaned over and opened the door.

"I brought you one. Want it?" Alex climbed back in, sipping at her drink. "Ah, that's better."

"No thanks." Bobby shook his head. He hadn't been drinking much coffee lately; it'd started to have a very strange effect on him. "You can have it."

"All right." Alex pulled out of the parking lot, giving her partner one more quick glance. He was acting as if there was nothing unusual at all about calling someone in the middle of the night and expecting them to go out for a drive, wasn't he? She sighed. Bobby was eccentric, but he wasn't entirely oblivious. Not usually, anyway. "So," she asked at last, "why the drive?"

"I don't know," Bobby replied after a long pause. "I've always liked going on the highway." Bobby began tapping his finger against the car window. What else was he supposed to say? There was no way he could explain it; there was just no way. He sighed heavily. He at once wanted her to inquire further and desperately hoped she'd stay silent. It didn't make any sense. It just didn't make any sense.

"Is everything okay, Bobby?" Alex slowed for a moment, turning towards him.

"It's fine, it's fine." Bobby's eyes narrowed. Why was it that he could never articulate anything? Language seemed always insufficient, somehow. His thoughts came too quickly; his words were like a camera trying to capture a speeding train and coming out blurred, useless. "Alex? Do you want me to drive?" Alex raised an eyebrow.

"You want to drive?"

"No. I mean, you seem tired. And you're going sort of slow." Alex checked the speedometer.

"Bobby, we're not even on the highway yet and I'm already over the speed limit here." Alex frowned, flicking on her turn signal and heading for the entrance ramp. "Once we get on the highway we'll speed up." Bobby nodded. "How fast do you want me to go, anyway?" Her partner shrugged, shifting awkwardly in his seat.

"I don't know. It's okay. It doesn't matter." Finally, Alex accelerated. Bobby felt himself start to relax. They slid onto the highway, water flying up out of the puddles on the side of the road as they sped through them. Bobby watched the droplets on the window trace out patterns down the graying glass; then he turned and focused his gaze on the flashes of light flaring up and fading in the opposite lane. It was almost as if the light waves were weaving themselves together, forming a patchwork, a pattern. "You know," he began, "I was reading about Special Relativity the other day."

"Yeah?" Did Alex sound aggravated? Bobby tilted his head, watching her; a moment later he continued.

"I mean, it's fascinating. This is a classic example. Nothing can go faster than the speed of light. Newtonian mechanics would posit that you should simply add the two velocities. Of the light and our car, that is. The light coming off of our car." Alex sped up and switched into the other lane. "It's not like that, though. You have time dilation. I'm sure you've heard of it, but it's really even more interesting when you apply the actual formulae and work out the details. The other night I was–"

"Bobby, how in the world do you find time for this?" Bobby paused. A moment later he slammed his fist down on the dashboard. "Bobby?"

"I don't know! I just – I just – I forgot what I was saying." Bobby felt his thoughts spiraling out again. He liked to think about physics, sometimes. There was something so clean and clear about it. Now everything was colliding again; the confusion was coming back.

"You were saying something about Special Relativity."

"Oh. That's right." Bobby rubbed his forehead. "I was doing some research the other night. On Special Relativity. The calculations. The way they figure it out is they calculate gamma, which is one over the square root of one minus – one minus the velocity of – of the object divided by the speed of light squared." Bobby turned to stare at Alex, waiting for her response.

"I see." Alex passed the car in front of her and swerved back into the other lane. She was probably just about the only detective in the force that would ever be stupid enough to agree to take her partner out driving in the middle of the night. Then again, she was also the only detective in the force lucky enough – or unlucky enough, depending on the circumstances – to be paired up with Bobby Goren. Bobby was a good guy. He could just be a bit tiring, that was all. Alex moved her hand towards the radio, preparing to search for a good station. Just as she did so, however, a gust of freezing air flooded into the car and hit her in the face.

"Bobby, what are you doing?" She glanced over towards him. He'd rolled down the window all the way and was holding his hand out against the wind. This was the sort of behavior she expected from her nephew! "Close the window! It's freezing!"

"Oh." After a pause, Bobby complied. "Sorry."

"No, it's okay. It's just kind of cold out." Alex shivered. What was with him, anyway? Alex frowned. He'd been acting a bit uncharacteristically for a while, in fact. He'd get distracted in the middle of investigating evidence and giving case reports. He'd talk at great length about completely random and unrelated topics. He'd come up with theories that were farfetched even by his standards. Alex snuck another glance at him. If it hadn't been for the way he'd sounded on the phone, she probably wouldn't even have stopped to think about it. But now…

"Do you like highways?" It took Alex a while to register the fact that Bobby had gone on speaking.

"What?"

"Do you like highways? I think they're rather underappreciated from – from an aesthetic point of view. The lights, you know. It's like the bridges. And the city itself, really. The George Washington is really the most beautiful, though." Bobby pointed ahead, gesturing at the glowing outline of the George Washington Bridge. "There's something – there's something stunning about the symmetry. Then think about all the people going by. If the average speed on the bridge is – is around–"

"Bobby, I'm really too tired to do math right now. All these numbers are going to give me a headache." Alex attempted a wry grin and then turned on the radio. "Want to listen to music while we drive? Bobby?" She could have sworn he flinched as the sound flooded into the car. Hurriedly, she turned it down. "Too loud?"

"No. It just – it just surprised me."

"Want me to turn it off?"

"No, no. Do you have any other music? Not the radio, I mean." Alex nodded.

"There's a case in the glove compartment." There was a click; a moment later Bobby pulled it out. Alex sighed, wondering what he'd make of her music collection. She'd always had a weakness for ABBA and Madonna; Bobby, on the other hand, liked classical music.

"How about this?" Bobby handed her a brightly colored disk. She glanced at it.

"Dance Hits 2000?" Alex laughed. "Are you sure? I mean, I'm not disputing your decision here, but I'm not sure this is really–"

"No, no. I like it."

"Okay," Alex replied, shrugging and putting in the disc. "I guess we can always change it," she added, adjusting the volume as the beat came booming into the back of the car. She never would have guessed that her partner loved to listen to dance music, of all things! Taking a deep breath, she concentrated back on the road, slowing to round a curve.

"It sounds like crystals."

"What?" The music had gotten quite loud. The baseline was pounding its way right into her skull. "Bobby, turn it down, will you?"

"What?"

"TURN IT DOWN!" The volume decreased slightly. Alex sighed. "That's better. What did you say?"

"I was talking about the music. It sounds like crystals. I like the sound." Bobby turned it up again, following the music with his mind. He'd first found out how much he enjoyed that sort of music one night when he was wandering about and heard it streaming out of a club. Curious, he'd gone in and simply sat there, watching as the others swayed and spun themselves around. There was something calming about the way the rhythms repeated themselves, appearing and reappearing yet never staying exactly the same. The music was fast-paced too. He'd needed that. "Alex?" The car was slowing down. What was she doing? "Alex?" She didn't answer. She was pulling over to the side. Bobby frowned. She was saying something, but he couldn't hear her. Finally, he felt her arm reach out towards the radio. The sound of the music disappeared; silence swelled out into the car.

"Bobby, you can't play it that loud!" Alex rested her head in her hands. "Bobby." She raised her head slowly, turning towards him. "Bobby, I'm not really sure this is such a good idea." She took a deep breath. "I think you need to get some sleep, as do I." Maybe he just hadn't been sleeping enough. That could account for his behavior. Couldn't it? She sighed.

"Why?" To his surprise, Bobby didn't feel frustrated. He just felt scared, somehow. "Do we have to?" His voice sounded small in the stillness. "I'm not tired. I can't sleep. I'm not tired." Alex pressed a button, turning on a small light. He felt her eyes upon him.

"I think you're overtired." Alex paused. "Bobby. You have to tell me, okay? Is anything the matter?" Bobby felt his chest tighten uncomfortably.

"No." Yes, yes, yes. "No. I don't know. Maybe."

"You were saying something to me on the phone, remember?" Alex spoke quietly. She was afraid of being condescending. No matter what was happening, her partner didn't deserve to be talked down to. That would be the worst insult of all.

"I guess." Bobby sighed, trying to reel in his racing thoughts. "I don't know. I can't sleep and I'm just – I'm – I'm kind of – kind of thinking too fast. I keep thinking things and then forgetting what they were." He closed his eyes for a second. "I can't drink coffee anymore. I feel like I've already drank coffee, all the time. Too much coffee." Alex was sitting up straight, listening attentively. "It's okay most of the time. It's okay. I just – got scared. Or nervous. I thought – I thought if – I don't know." His voice was starting to shake. "It's not what you think. I don't think so. I'm not like her. It's different. It's different, right? I'm okay. I just – it's strange. I can't–"

"It's okay." Alex spoke steadily, trying to hide her increasing concern. At least he noticed it, too. That was a good sign, wasn't it? "It's okay. It'll be okay." She wasn't sure if she was trying to convince him, convince herself, or do both at the same time. If only she knew more about psychology. At the moment, the only conclusion she could come to was that Bobby had to speak to somebody – somebody who could really reassure him that what he feared most wasn't true. Alex took a deep breath. What did she know about schizophrenia? She'd read a book about it, some years ago; it'd been lying about in a bookstore and she'd bought it on impulse. If she remembered correctly, it stated that schizophrenia's defining characteristic was that it caused those affected by it to become delusional, to hallucinate. Schizophrenics would then slowly start to withdraw from reality until they lived almost completely in worlds of their own invention. She turned towards Bobby again. Thinking too fast? Too much coffee? Scared, nervous? He wasn't acting like someone withdrawing from the world, as far as she could tell. He was acting like someone on amphetamines. He'd wanted her to drive faster. He'd turned the music up so loud she couldn't stand it and hadn't even been the slightest bit bothered by it, though she knew very well that his hearing was just fine. "And I think you're right," she added at last. "I don't think it's that. I don't know much, of course. But I don't think–"

"She wasn't like this." Bobby was tapping against the window again. "I'm not schizophrenic. I – I'm not." He stirred in his seat. Everything was blurring together. It wasn't good. He knew that. But he wasn't like her. He wasn't. "Alex? Could we drive again?"

"Sure." She pulled back onto the highway, noting the way he calmed slightly as she sped up. He was restless, she realized. Bobby had always been one to move about, but lately he'd been more agitated than usual. He could hardly sit still. "Bobby." He turned towards her. "How long has – how long has this been going on for?"

"Not sure. I've – I've always been kind of – kind of like this. Just not as much." Bobby pulled off his sweater. He was sweating like mad, for some reason. He paused.

"Are you going to tell anyone?"

"Tell anyone?" What would she tell them, anyway? "Not if you don't want me to. But – you know – you–"

"I will."

"When?"

"I don't know. I – I guess – soon."

"Do you know anyone?" Bobby nodded.

"My mother's doctor talks to me sometimes. I mean, just general stuff. But we – we get along." Alex nodded.

"That's good. When are you going to go down there?"

"I don't know. I didn't go see her. I haven't gone recently. I – I couldn't. I – I was afraid." Alex considered her words carefully.

"Do you want me to drive down with you?" It was the least she could do. Hopefully he wouldn't find the offer intrusive…

"If you want." Bobby paused. "I – I would appreciate that," he added, leaning back in his seat and closing his eyes again. They stung from lack of sleep. "What about the case?"

"What about it?" Alex paused. Secretly, she sort of wished he'd just take the rest of the week off. Even before his decision to drive around in the middle of the night, she'd already been worried. Most likely, Deakins was concerned, too. If he kept showing up for work like this, he'd start asking questions. But what else could she tell him to do? At least if he was with her she could look out for him, couldn't she? Besides, he was still a good detective. When he was concentrating his flashes of insight were more brilliant than ever. He just had trouble with some things. That was all. And that's where she could help him. Just in case, though, it was probably best to give him the opportunity to back out. "If you feel that you need some time off," she said at last, "that's fine."

"No!" Bobby sat up, his voice sharp with sudden agitation. "No, I can't!" Alex immediately regretted having asked. "Eames, you don't understand! You don't understand. This doesn't make sense!"

"I know." Bobby felt her hand reach out towards his. Alex had thin, elegant hands. Slowly, he extended his hand in return. They were connected, now. He took a deep breath, closing his eyes once again. "I know, Bobby. It doesn't make sense." Alex paused, trying her best to summon up some more confidence. "I think it will get better, though. I think it will."

And, in the darkness, she could have sworn she could feel him smile, just a little.