Whitney: and after another break, I'm baaa-ack!
Erk: Darn. We were all hoping you would STAY AWAY
Whitney: Just for that, I am making your date with Serra a prolonged event. I might even switch my 'character point of view' for a chapter or two, JUST to spite you.
Erk: ...I hate you.
Whitney: good, I'm so glad.
Erk: ...
Whitney: Anyway. If there are any mistakes in this chapter, I'm blaming it on how long it is. Act one, Scene five is a really, really, really long scene. I was thinking about doing two again, but I think my eyeballs are about to be burned out of their sockets. If you could see how bad my typing is right now -
Heath: She keeps erasing it to make it look nice.
Whitney: -you'd agree
Nino: what DOES your typing look like right now?
Whitneu: without erasing the msitakes? Something close to thinks, only worse because i kwwp backspance ing my acciendey.
#translation: Whitney: without erasing the mistakes? Something close to this, only worse because I keep backspacing by accident.#
Heath: wow.
Erk: Maybe you shouldn't write anymore today?
Whitney: yeah, good thing it's already writting.
Erk:...darn...
Whitney: on with act one, scene five, the terribly long, frustrating, and probably not very funny chapter!
Main Characters:
Orsino - Heath
Olivia - Lyn
Sebastian - Hector
Viola - Nino
Antonio - Eliwood
Maria - Rebecca
Valentine - Wil
Curio - Rath T
oby - Sain
Andrew - Erk
Malvolio - Jaffar
Feste - Matthew
Fabian – Kent
Extras:
Captain: Guy
Attendants: Serra, Priscilla
Servant: Florina
Officers: Lowen, Karla
Priest: Ninian
English/Drama class was first thing that morning, instead of after lunch. The so-dubbed "Shakespeare Students" class milled around outside their lockers and homeroom, waiting for the annoying little kid with the bell to do his morning lap around the building, bringing ear problems and hearing loss to every student he passed.
CLANG! CLANG! CLANG!...
"I swear," Hector muttered as the little kid scurried wil-nil around the halls, "I am going to take that bell and throw it into a deep lake one day. And maybe send the little kid along with it."
"I sure hope you don't," Ninian said severely. "That's my little brother, Nils."
"You have a brother?"
"I just said I did, didn't I?"
"Damn," Hector sighed. "I guess that kills that idea."
"C'mon guys," Lyn chided. "The bells rung! We need to get to the gym!"
"No, we don't," Hector growled. "Maybe I'll just skip today. What can she do about it?"
"Flunk you?"
"Thank you, Eliwood. I KNEW I could count on you to make me feel better."
"You're always welcome, Hector."
"#%"
"Hector! Watch your language!"
"Grr..."
"Just come ON!" Lyn snapped at him.
"Fine, fine," He rolled his eyes skyward. "Noisy, annoying, green- haired WITCH – "
"WHAT did you just call me?!?!"
"Uh, Nothing..."
"Like fun, you – "
"CALM DOWN!" Eliwood yelled, stopping both Lyndis and Hector in their advancement on each other. "Act like you're at LEAST 13, guys. Right now, you're both acting like you belong in PRESCHOOL. Now let's go, before we're really late." Hector and Lyn followed Eliwood, glaring at each other as they did. Eliwood sighed.
"Maria, Clown. Get up there!" Ms. Spencer's attitude hadn't improved since the last class, and her students moved when she shouted. It was obvious if they didn't they'd be in more trouble than they were right now, and they'd rather avoid that, if possible. Another class had once gotten on her bad side, and they'd all been afraid of their shadows for months afterwards.
Rebecca and Matthew climbed up onto the stage and stood facing each other. Rebecca looked a little more nervous than last time, probably because it'd been her laughter that had gotten Ms. Spencer into her bad mood in the first place. Matthew gave her an encouraging smile and nodded at her to start.
"'Nay, either tell me where –'" She broke off to look nervously at Ms. Spencer. "'T-thou hast been, or I will not open my lips so wide as a bristle may enter in way of thy excuse. M-My lady will hang thee for thy absence.'"
"'Let her hang me,'" Matthew said in an off-hand manner, like it didn't matter to him on bit. And it probably didn't: he'd already read to the end and knew he'd survive. "'He that is well hang'd in this world needs to fear no colours.'"
"'Make that good.'" Rebecca replied tartly.
"'He shall see none to fear.'"
"'A good Lenten answer. I can tell thee where that saying was born, of "I fear no colours".'"
"'Where, good Mistress Mary?'"
"Why does everyone call her 'Mary', when it says her name is MARIA?" Hector complained quietly.
"A nickname?" Eliwood suggested.
"I didn't know they were allowed to use nicknames in a royal house." He replied sourly.
"Well, I've never been to a royal house. If I ever DO get to go, I'll let you know about it."
"Thanks."
"'In the wars,'" Rebecca was continuing. "'and that may you be bold to say in your foolery.'"
"'Well, God gave them wisdom that have it; and those that are fools, let them use their talents.'" Matthew grinned impishly.
Rebecca, who needed to be serious, was having trouble keeping a straight face. "'Yet you will be hang'd for being so long absent, or, to be turn'd away – is not that as good as a hanging to you?'"
"'Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage; and for turning away, let summer bear it out.'" Matthew was acting carefree again, just like always.
"'You are resolute then?'" Rebecca asked him.
"'Not so, neither, but I am resolv'd on two points.'"
"'That if one break, the other will hold; or if both break, you gaskins fall.'" Rebecca snapped at him.
Matthew grinned at Rebecca. "'Apt, in good faith, very apt. Well, go thy way; if Sir Toby would leave drinking, thou wert as witty a piece of Eve's flesh as any in Illyria.'"
"'Peace, you rogue,'" it was hard to tell if Rebecca was acting or really cranky now. "'No more o' that. Here comes my lady. Make your excuse wisely, you were best.'" With that she left, while Lyn entered on time, Jaffar right behind her.
"Well, I guess that kills my asking Lyn what just happened in the last scene, huh?" Hector grumbled.
"If I get it right, Matthew's been gone somewhere for a long time, and Olivia – Lyn – is really mad at him. Rebecca's telling him this, and warning him to be careful, or he'll be hanged or, more likely, dismissed and out of work. Feste, like Matthew, really doesn't act like he cares, but he probably does."
"Gee, Ninian," Hector raised his eyebrows. "Maybe I should go to you for interpretation. You don't swear at me or call me hopeless. It's rather nice, y'know." Hector winked and Ninian smiled at the joke.
Onstage, Matthew bowed to the scowling Lyn. "'Wit, an't be thy will, put me into good fooling! Those wits, that think they have thee do very oft prove fools; and I, that am sure I lack thee, may pass for a wide man. For what says Quinapalus? "Better a witty fool than a foolish wit" – God bless thee, lady!'"
"Wow, he said that all in, like, one sentence," Eliwood admired. "That might be even better than Sain's memorizing of all his lines."
"'Take the fool away,'" Lyn snapped to Jaffar, who tried not to glare at her, but failed and glared anyway.
"'Do you not hear, fellows? Take away the lady,'" Matthew countered.
"'Go to, y'are a dry fool; I'll no more of you. Besides, you grow dishonest.'"
"'Two faults, Madonna, that drink and good counsel will amend; for give the dry fool drink, then is the fool not dry; bid the dishonest man mend himself: if he mend, he is no longer dishonest; if he cannot, let the botcher mend him. Any thing that's mended is but patch'd; virtue that transgresses is but patch'd with sin, and sin that amends is but patch'd with virtue. If that this simple syllogism will serve, so; if it will not, what remedy? As there is no true cockold but calamity, so beauty's a flower. The lady bade take away the fool; therefore, I say again, take her away.'" After that, Matthew looked a little blue in the face from a lack of oxygen trying to fast-talk himself out of death.
"'Sir, I bade them take away you,'" Lyn said icily.
"'Misprision in the highest degree!" Matthew cried. "Lady, "Cucullus non facit monachum"; that's as much to say as I wear not motley in my brain. Good Madonna, give me leave to prove you a fool.'"
"Isn't Madonna a singer?" Hector asked.
"They're talking about the Virgin Mary, Hector."
"Huh? That doesn't make sense."
"It's also an obsolete way of addressing –married- women in Italy."
"Olivia's not married."
"Get over it, Hector."
"'Can you do it?'" Lyn taunted.
"'Dexteriously, good Madonna.'"
"'Make your proof.'"
"'I must catechize you for it, Madonna. Good my mouse of virtue, answer me.'"
"'Well, sir, for want of other idleness, I'll bide your proof.'"
Matthew winced theatrically, as if wounded. "'Good Madonna, why mourn'st thou?'"
"'Good fool, for my brother's death.'"
"'I think his soul is in hell, Madonna.'"
"'I know his soul is in heaven, fool.'" Lyn snapped at him.
"'The more fool, Madonna, to mourn for your brother's soul being in heaven. Take away the fool, gentlemen.'" Matthew grinned triumphantly.
"'What think you of this fool, Malvolio?'" Lyn asked, turning to face Jaffar, who stood stony faced. "'Doth he not mend?'"
"'Yes...'" Jaffar's voice was very low and hoarse, and Hector found himself leaning forward to try and hear the low, slow-speaking Malvolio.
(A/N: haha, that rhymes!)
"'...and shall do till the pangs of death,'" at the word death, Jaffar's voice grew a little louder. "'shake him. ... Infirmity... that decays the wise, doth... ever make a better fool.'"
"Good thing he doesn't have many lines," Hector commented. "He takes so long to say something we'd all die of old age before the middle of the plan." Eliwood tried not to grin as Ninian laughed quietly.
"'God send you, sir, a speedy infirmity, for the better increasing your folly! Sir Toby will be sworn that I am no fox; but he will not pass his word for twopence that you are no fool.'" Matthew shot at Jaffar.
"'How say you to that, Malvolio?'" Lyn asked.
"'... I ... marvel your ladyship takes delight in such a ... barren... rascal. I saw him – '"
"Come ON Jaffar!" someone yelled. Twisting around, Hector saw Serra yelling from the back. "We'll be here all DAY if you don't speed up!" there were a few murmured agreements. Jaffar glared.
"'I saw him put down the other day with an ordinary fool that has no more brain than a stone. Look you now, he's out of his guard already. Unless you laugh and minister occasion to him, he is gagg'd. I protest I take these wise men that crow so at these set kind of fools no better than the fools' zanies.'"
There were more than a few open mouths at Jaffar's sudden increase of speech, and more than one of the girls were getting strange looks on their faces and little hearts floating around their heads. Nino was beaming.
"'O – o, you are sick of self-love, Malvolio,'" Lyn tried to recover herself, and spoke while giving Jaffar the oddest look. "'And taste with a distemper'd appetite. To be generous, guiltless, and of free disposition, is to take those things for bird-bolts that you deem cannon-bullets. There is no slander in an allow'd fool, though he do nothing but rail; nor no railing in a known discreet main, though he do nothing but reprove.'"
"Care to translate for me, Ninian?" Hector asked.
"Um," Ninian furrowed her brow thinking. "Basically, Olivia was going to dismiss him, but Feste managed to talk his way out of it. Now Malvolio's trying to get rid of him, but not having much luck, and even Olivia is starting to make fun of him. ...I think, anyway..." Ninian looked worried.
"Sounds right to me," Eliwood said, giving Ninian a hug that she gladly accepted. Hector turned his head back towards the stage as Rebecca ran back up the steps.
"'Madam, there is at the gate a young gentleman who much desires to speak with you.'" She panted.
"'From the Count Orsino, is it?'" Lyn rolled her eyes.
"'I know not, madam. 'Tis a fair young man, and well attended.'" Rebecca bowed her head.
"'Who of my people hold him in delay?'" Lyn asked.
"'Sir Toby, madam, your kinsman,'" Rebecca answered.
"'Fetch him off, I pray you, he speaks nothing by mad-man; fie on him!'" Lyn scolded and Rebecca scurried offstage again. "'Go you, Malvolio; if it be a suit from the Count, I am sick, or not at home – what you will, to dismiss it.'" Jaffar silently turned and slipped off the stage. "'Now you see, sir, how your fooling grows old, and people dislike it.'" Lyn eyed Matthew.
"'Thou hast spoke for us, Madonna, as if thy eldest son should be a fool; whose skull Jove cram with brains! For – here he comes – '" Matthew broke off as Sain came swaggering onto the stage. "'one of thy kin has a most weak pia mater.'"
"'By min honour, half drunk. What is he at the gate, cousin?'" Lyn asked with obvious distaste.
"'A gentleman,'" Sain said proudly. Probably for still knowing all his lines.
"'A gentleman? What gentleman?'" Lyn asked.
"''Tis a gentleman here – a plague o' these pickle-herring! How now, sot?'"
"'Good Sir Toby!'" Matthew cried.
"'Cousin, cousin, how have you come so early to this lethargy?'" Lyn demanded.
"'Lechery! I defy lechery. There's one at the gate.'" Sain said.
"I wonder if he knows what his words really mean," Hector snickered. "I know he probably intends to be all noble and chivalrous, but his stupid attitude are working perfectly."
"'Ay, marry, what is he?'" Lyn asked, trying to be patient. She was starting to imitate Erk by having her eye twitch.
"'Let him be the devil an he will, I care not; give me faith, say I. Well, it's all one.'" Sain said and walked off.
"Absolutely, bloody perfect!" Hector crowed.
"Hector! Be nice!" Ninian hissed.
"Well, at least be quiet, or you might set Ms. Spencer off again," Eliwood grinned, obviously agreeing with his friend. Try as he might, Sain was giving his person the perfect impression, without even meaning too.
"'What's a drunken man like, fool?'" Lyn asked Matthew.
"'Like a drown'd man, a fool, and a madman. One draught above heat makes him a fool, the second mads him, and a third drowns him.'" Matthew answered.
"'Go thou and seek the crowner, and let him sit o' my coz; for he's in the third degree of drink, he's drown'd. Go look after him.'"
"'He is but mad yet, Madonna, and the fool shall look to the madman.'" Matthew grinned as he left after Sain.
Jaffar re-approached the stage, his face stony. "'Madam,'" he spoke to Lyn, his face expressionless. "'yond young fellow swears he will speak with you. I told him you were sick; he takes on him to understand so much and therefore comes to speak with you. I told him you were asleep; he seems to have foreknowledge of that too, and therefore comes to speak with you. What is to be said to him, lady? He's fortified against any denial.'"
"'Tell him he shall not speak to me,'" Lyn said haughtily.
"'H'as been told so; and he says he'll stand at your door like a sheriff's post, and be the supporter to a bench, but he'll speak with you.'"
"'What kind o' man is he?'" Lyn asked.
"'Why, of mankind,'" Jaffar surprised the entire class by saying it in an offhand manner, accompanied by a small, sly grin. A few people applauded.
"'What MANNER of man?'" Lyn asked.
"'Of very ill manner; he'll speak with you, will you or no.'"
"'Of what personage and years is he?'"
"'Not yet old enough for a man, nor young enough for a boy; as a squash is before 'tis a peascod, or a codling when 'tis almost an apple. 'Tis with him in standing water, between boy and man. He is very well-favor'd and he speaks very shrewishly. One would think his mother's milk were scarcely out of him.'"
"'Let him approach. Call in my gentlewoman.'" Lyn commanded.
"'Gentlewoman, my lady calls,'" Jaffar said as he walked off the stage, crossing paths once again with Rebecca.
"'Give me my veil; come, throw it o'er my face. We'll once more hear Orsino's embassy.'" Lyn sighed as Rebecca pantomimed throwing a veil over her head.
Nino, flanked by the two 'attendants', Serra and Priscilla, trooped onstage and stood opposite to Lyn and Rebecca.
"'The honourable lady of the house, which is she?'" Nino asked, looking at Lyn as a dead giveaway.
"'Speak to me; I shall answer for her. Your will?'" Lyn answered
"'Most radiant, exquisite, and unmatchable beauty – I pray you tell me if this be the lady of house, for I never saw her. I would be loath to cast away my speech; for besides that it is excellently well penn'd, I have taken great pains to con it. Good beauties, let me sustain no scorn; I am very comptible, even to the least sinister usage.'" Nino began, speaking as if she had recited it from memory.
"'Whence came you, sir?'"
"'I can say little more than I have studied, and that question's out of my part. Good gentle one, give me modest assurance if you be the lady of the house, that I may proceed in my speech.'"
"'Are you a comedian?"' Lyn demanded.
"'No, my profound heat; and yet (by the very fangs of malice I swear) I am not that I play. Are you the lady of the house?'" Nino asked, sounding exasperated.
"'If I do not usurp myself, I am.'" Lyn admitted
"That all sounds familiar," Hector said, trying to remember where he'd heard it before.
"It was the lines the girls used for the tryouts, remember?" Ninian told him.
"Oh, right, right."
"'Most certain you are she, you do usurp yourself; for what is yours to bestow is not yours to reserve. But this is from my commission; I will on with my speech in your praise, and then show you the heart of my message.'" Nino looked more than a little confused at the meaning of the script, but shrugged and kept reading.
"'Come to what is important in't. I forgive you the praise.'" Lyn said dismissively.
"'Alas, I took great pains to study it, and 'tis poetical.'" Nino sounded disappointed.
"'It is the more like to be feign'd, I pray you keep it in. I heard you were saucy at my gates, and allow'd your approach rather to wonder at you than to hear you. If you be not mad, be gone. If you have reason, be brief. 'Tis not that time of moon with me to make one in so skipping a dialogue.'"
"Heh. And that translates into 'it's her time of month'.'" Eliwood grinned wickedly while Ninian pummelled him lightly.
"'Will you hoist sail, sir? Here lies your way,'" Rebecca offered, obviously eager to get rid of Nino.
"'No, good swabber, I am to hull here a little longer. Some mollification for your giant, sweet lady. Tell me your mind – I am a messenger.'" Nino flattered Lyn.
"'Sure you have some hideous matter to deliver, when the courtesy of it is so fearful. Speak your office.'" Lyn sighed.
"'It alone concerns your ear. I bring no overture of war, no taxation of homage; I hold the olive in my hand; my words are as full of peace as matter.'"
"'Yet you begin rudely. What are you? What would you?'" Lyn asked.
"'The rudeness that hath appear'd in me have I learn'd from my entertainment. What I am, and what I would are as secret as maidenhead: to your ears, divinity; to any other's, profanation.'"
"'Give us the place alone, we will hear this divinity.'" Lyn said, waving away the attendants and Rebecca, who all filed down the stairs once more. "'Now, sir, what is your text?'"
"'Most sweet lady-'" Nino began but was cut off by Lyn.
"'A comfortable doctrine, and much may be said of it. Where lies your text?'"
"'In Orsino's bosom.'"
"I would so love to poke fun at that, but it's so perfect I don't even need to," Hector grinned to Eliwood.
"'In his bosom? In what chapter of his bosom?'"
"'To answer by the method, in the first of his heart,'" Nino answered sagely, although Hector doubted she understood much of what she said. Nino was simply a natural genius, whether she knew it or not.
"'O, I have read it; it is heresy. Have you no more to say?'" Lyn said grumpily.
"'Good madam, let me see your face.'"
"'Have you any commission from your lord to negotiate with my face? You are now out of your text; but we will draw the curtain and show you the picture. Look you, sir, such a one I was this present,'" Lyn said, brushing away the 'veil' about her face. "'Is't not well done?'"
"'Excellently done, if God did all.'"
"''Tis in grain, sir; 'twill endure wind and weather.'"
"''Tis beauty truly blent, whose red and while nature's own sweet and cunning hand laid on. Lady you are the crull'st she alive if you will lead these graces to the grave, and leave the world no copy,'" Nino flattered Lyn outrageously.
"'O, sir, I will not be so hard-hearted; I will give out divers schedules of my beauty. It shall be inventoried, and every particle and utensil labell'd to my will: as, item, two lips, indifferent red; item, two gray eyes, with lids to them; item, one neck, on chin, and so forth. Were you send hither to praise me?'"
"'I see you what you are, you are too proud; but, if you were the devil, you are fair, my lord and master love you. O, such love could be but recompens'd though you were crown'd the nonpareil of beauty!'"
"'How does he love me?'" Lyn asked.
"'With adorations, fertile tears, with groans that thunder love, with sighs of fire,'" Nino said stubbornly.
"'Your lord does know my mind, I cannot love him, yet I suppose him virtuous, know him noble, of great estate, of fresh and stainless youth, in voices well divulg'd, free, learn'd, and valiant, and in dimension, and the shape of nature, a gracious person. But I cannot love him. He might have took his answer long ago.'" Lyn said with a sigh.
"'If I did love you in my master's flame, with such a suff'ring, such a deadly life, in your denial I would find no sense; I would not understand it.'" Nino said, her innocent eyes wide.
"'Why, what would you?'" Lyn asked, curious
"'Make me a willow cabin at your gate, and call upon my soul with the house; write loyal cantons of condemned love, and sing them loud even in the dead of night; hallow your name to the reverberate hills, and make the babbling gossip of the air cry out, "Olivia!" O, you should not rest between the elements of air and earth but you should pity me!'" Nino cried with such sincerity that she surprised maybe even herself.
"'You might do much. What is your parentage?'"
"'Above my fortunes, yet my state is well: I am a gentleman.'"
"'Get you to your lord. I cannot love him; let him send no more- Unless, perchance, you come to me again to tell me how he takes it. Fare you well. I thank you fore your pains. Spend this for me.'" Lyn nodded, miming her taking out money.
"'I am no fee'd post, lady; keep your purse; my master, not myself, lacks recompence. Love make his heart of flint that you shall love, and let your fervor like my master's, be plac'd in contempt! Farewell, fair cruelty,'" Nino said, bowing as she left.
"'"What is your parentage?" "Above my fortunes, yet my state is well: I am a gentleman."'" Lyn muttered to herself. "'I'll be sworn thou art; thy tongue, thy face, thy limbs, actions and spirit, do give the fivefold blazon. Not so fast! Soft, soft! Unless the master were a man. How now? Even so quickly may one catch the plague? Methinks I feel this youth's perfections with an invisible and subtly stealth to creep in at mine eyes. Well, let it be. What ho, Malvolio!'"
Jaffar glumly climbed the steps again. "'...Here, madam. ... At your service.'"
"Run after that same peevish messenger, the County's man. He left this ring behind him, would I or not. Tell him I'll none of it. Desire him not to flatter with his lord, nor hold him up with hopes: I am not for him. If that the youth will come this way to-morrow, I'll give him reasons for't. Hie thee, Malvolio.'"
"Can you explain that, Ninian?" Hector asked plaintively.
"All that in a nutshell is Viola is posing as a boy, trying to woo Olivia for Orsino. Olivia won't take any of it, but she'll listen to Viola. Viola charms Olivia, and Olivia falls in love, so when Viola leaves, she sends Malvolio after Viola with a ring that Viola supposedly left behind. This act will make Viola return the next day, which is what Olivia wants."
"Alright. Thanks, Ninian."
"Your welcome, Hector."
"'...Madam. ...I will.'" Jaffar left a lot faster than he'd came.
"'I do not know now what, and fear to find mine eye too great a flatterer for my mind. Fate, show thy force, ourselves we do not owe; what is decreed must be; and be this so.'" Lyn said, finally finished.
"Very good, class!" Ms. Spencer beamed. Her temperment had greatly improved over the course of the scene. "Alright, you can leave in a moment. However: Tomorrow is Saturday, day off, ect. We need to start costumes, so I need all the major characters HERE by noon –" There were several groans. "If you are a major character, and you aren't here, I'll give your part to someone else." She threatened. The groaning quieted a lot, but there still grumbling by the late risers. "We'll be done by initial fittings by four, so afterwards your free to go. Sunday is your day off, and Monday we start all over again. Clear?"
"Clear," the class chorused.
"You can go."
There was an instant stampede as everyone ran for the doors. Once outside the gym, Hector stretched, cracking a few bones in the process.
"It's getting REALLY boring, just sitting there doing nothing," Eliwood commented.
"It's a good time to nap."
"HECTOR!" his friends yelled.
"Alright, alright, calm down. Eesh..."
"By the way, Ninian," Eliwood turned to his girlfriend with a grin. "How did the talk with Erk go?"
Ninian grinned. "Just fine. He believed every word I said."
"What did you tell him?" Hector asked nervously.
"I told him that Nino wanted to go on a date, but she was afraid Jaffar would get angry with her, so she arranged for it through proxy. She would met him there in case Jaffar was at her house when he came by, and he couldn't tell anyone in case Jaffar found out. So that eliminates all possibilities of anyone finding out and tipping either Erk or Serra off."
"..Ninian, I love you."
Lyn glared at Hector as Ninian blushed and Eliwood laughed.
Whitney: and that's all. I think I'll go give my eyes a rest before they burn up on me. I know that was mostly lines from the play, but by the time I got through it, I couldn't think of anything really funny, so I ended it quickly. Sowwy.
Nino: Read and review, pleeeease? #puppy eyes#
Matthew: #shifty look# the more you review, the quicker the next one goes up...
Heath: It'll probably go up fast, regardless.
Matthew: Shaddup
Whitney: bep, debep, debep, t-t-that's all folks!