Whitney: I know it gets annoying readying all this Shakespeare stuff when most people are more interested in what goes on BETWEEN the people. So I can do some different things –

Jaffar: Cancel the play!

Whitney: and that's not one of them. I could cut the scenes short (especially when they're the longer chapters), or I could scenes into parts and interrupt them more. Which would mean this play would be something like 20 chapters.

All: ... err...

Whitney: Any other ideas would be good too. As shown earlier I'm switching POV's around because, I mean, Hector just sitting there listening isn't all the interesting. Kinda boring, in fact, ne? I'm just trying to make this an interesting as I can.

Erk: #heavy sarcasm# and you're doing a WONDERFUL job

Whitney: I know.

Erk: -.-

Whitney: I don't own FE, Hoobastank, etc.

Nino: WOOOW O.O She did the disclaimer ALL by HERSELF!

Karla: Finally, we don't have to spoon feed her anymore!

All: wheeeeeeeeeee!

Whintey: -.-;;

Main Characters:

Orsino - Heath

Olivia - Lyn

Sebastian - Hector

Viola - Nino

Antonio - Eliwood

Maria - Rebecca

Valentine - Wil

Curio - Rath

Toby - Sain

Andrew - Erk

Malvolio - Jaffar

Feste - Matthew

Fabian – Kent

Extras:

Captain: Guy

Attendants: Serra, Priscilla

Servant: Florina

Officers: Lowen, Karla

Priest: Ninian

"Yay. Hump day," Hector said, without too much enthusiasm. He may have caught up on his sleep but that didn't make him want to jump around like Serra was going. Apparently she'd hooked Erk into taking her on another date as an "apology" for the fight. If anything, Erk should be apologizing to Matthew, but no one ever dared argue with Serra. She used "illogical logic" and there was absolutely no guard against that. He's learned that a long time ago. So everyone just let Serra do what she wanted, no questions asked.

That wasn't the only Date-rumour going around. As far as Hector had heard that day, there was Erk and Serra (on for tonight), Nino and Jaffar (top secret, but supposedly on for Friday or Saturday. There was also that ridiculous rumour that they were eloping), Him and Lyn (that hadn't been formalized yet, and he hadn't heard the date because they'd stopped talking the second they saw him), Sain and Rebecca (that was false, as of yet), and, of course, Eliwood and Ninian (on for Friday). It seemed like the entire class was hooking up with each other. Hector had the sinking feeling that he was part of the most screwed-up class in all of North America and beyond.

He was probably right too.

"Heya Hector!" Lyn – quite literally – came bouncing over to him. She had a grin on her face, and seemed no worse for the ware after her impromptu fight.

"Hey, Lyn," He greeted her back. Without groaning too. That was a first. "Hey, were we going out sometime this week?"

"Err..." Lyn looked a little startled at that, and then turned a little red. "No, I don't think so... were we?"

"I don't think so, so no probably," Hector said with an inward sigh of relief.

"Why do you ask?"

"Because according to rumour, we're one of the..." he paused to count the number of couples he'd heard of. "... Four or five couples going out sometime this week. One or two of those couples might even be true."

"Other than us, who is there?" Lyn asked. She could be the gossip hound if she wanted to be. But then again, she WAS a teenage girl, and Hector had yet to meet ANY girl could resist any piece of gossip, true or not. There was something about girls that made them have to know everything that was going on in the world, and then fix it.

He was just going to let Erk and Serra's first date slip on that score.

"Err... there's Erk and Serra – "

"Of course, they're a given. Almost all the girls heard Serra's lecture to Erk," Lyn grinned.

"Nino and Jaffar're the second pair," Hector said before being interrupted again.

"FINALLY!" Lyn exclaimed.

He decided not to tell her about the eloping part. "Eliwood and Ninian are on for Friday, and Rebecca and Sain are the last two."

Lyn made a face. "Rebecca and SAIN?!? Ugh!"

"That's kind of what I thought. I don't think it's true, though. Sain likes Rebecca, and she might like him, but she's not about to stoop to his level yet. She's still hanging around with Lowen, so Sain's going to have his work cut out for him."

"Lowen's not much better," Lyn protested. "All he thinks about is food!"

"But not women," Hector countered. "He's not likely to cheat on her for another woman, where Sain would."

"That's a point, I guess..." Lyn didn't look too happy about it. Hector couldn't blame her – at least Sain wasn't too bad to look at, but Lowen was another story. He also kept walking into things. It was a wonder he hadn't set his hair – as well as the school or his house – on fire when he was cooking. Hector had a feeling it was only a matter of time, however.

"Ah, let it rest. Bells going to ring any moment – "

CLANG! CLANG! CLANG! ...

"- So we'd better get to class huh?" He finished with a sigh. He hated that bell, and he was learning to hate English class. It was still better than math, though.

"Y-eah, let's go," Lyn sighed. Hector put his arm around her – more as an experiment than anything else – and "escorted" her to class.

So he would never, ever use those exact words. This is PG13, so we'll leave it at that, shall we?

"Hi guys!" Eliwood greeted them as they entered the "classroom" (AKA the gym). Like always, they were up front, and Hector, his arm STILL around Lyn, turned bright red as he walked down the aisle. This was beginning to look like a scene from a soap opera wedding in his mind, and it was more than a little creepy. Lyn looked like she was enjoying it, though.

"Hey, you two." Hector grinned at them. "Are you still on for Friday?"

The stunned look the two exchanged made Hector burst out laughing and Lyn giggled.

"How did YOU know that?" Ninian gasped.

"It's going around the class grapevine, along with about four other pairs, at least two of them false." Hector answered with a casual shrug.

"Who are the others?" Ninian asked. There was DEFINITELY something about girls and gossip.

"Erk and Serra," Hector started. Ninian was already giggling. Apparently she'd already heard about that. "Me and Lyn – "

"Are you?" Eliwood asked, his eyes gleaming.

"NO!" They both yelled. It eared them several odd looks and they quickly quieted down.

"Anyway, who else?" Eliwood asked, a grin on his face.

"Sain and Rebecca, you too, and Nino and Jaffar."

"It's about time!" Eliwood and Ninian chorused. Hector had to cover his smile with a hand because that was exactly what Lyn said.

"There's also this thing about Nino and Jaffar's date," Hector said with a grin. "There's a rumour that their "date" in cover-up for an elopement."

"WHAAAAAT!?!" Lyn, Eliwood and Ninian yelled. THAT netted then more a lot of odd looks.

"What's so shocking?" Ms. Spencer had entered when they were yelling and she was, apparently, as interested in gossip as any other female.

"Oh, we were just... discussing school projects, Ms. Spencer!" Lyn exclaimed.

"Yeah, we were just shocked when, uh, Hector told us about his project," Ninian continued Lyn's lie. Now he was screwed.

"Alright, that's good. What project is that, Hector?" Ms. Spencer asked. The entire class was now watching them, and Hector needed a good lie.

"It's a secret, Ms. Spencer," Hector said with an innocent expression. "But I guess I can give you a bit of a preview." He grinned as he got an idea. "It's a study on students and lying to the teacher, and other members of the faculty. It's a report and graph, and includes examples."

"Maybe I should look into that report Hector – I could use it as a guidebook," Ms. Spencer grinned. Hector nodded with a fixed, false smile.

"Sure Ms. Spencer," he said, his hand twitching. Behind him Eliwood was on the verge of laughing. He made a vow to hurt Eliwood, the next chance he got. Not TOO hard, of course – Ninian might get mad at him if her boyfriend was in traction during their date.

"Alright class, today it's Act one, Scene Four. Heath, Nino, and Rath."

Heath and Rath walked to the stage with slight grimaces while Nino went on a head, bouncing excitedly. She was always excited, unless Jaffar got mad at her. Then, of course, Jaffar had to endure to ire of every girl in the class, so he didn't often get mad at her, if ever.

This was promising to be a very long day...
Heath's POV

He was supposed to be a – if not the – main character, but he hadn't gotten to say many lines yet. The people who had had more time on stage were doing a good job – so he had to do better. And that was the only option.

"Are you ready Heath?" Nino asked, looking up at him with those wide green, innocent eyes. It was a little disconcerting. He was starting to wish that he really COULD marry her at the end of the play. Of course, Jaffar would probably kill him in he did. He sighed inwardly.

"Yeah, let's get going, 'K Rath?"

"Let's go," Rath said curtly.

"'Give me some music. Now good morrow, friends. Now, good Cesario, but that piece of song, that old and antique song we heard last night. Methought it did relieve my passion much, more than light airs and recollected terms of these most brisk and giddy-paced times. Come, but one verse,'" Heath said with a theatrical sigh.

"'He is not here, so please your lordship, that should sing it,'" Rath said, totally deadpan. There was NO emotion in his voice at all.

"'Who was it?'" Heath asked.

"' Feste, the jester, my lord; a fool that the lady Olivia's father took much delight in. He is about the house.'" Rath said with a stiff bow.

"'Go, seek him out, and play the tune the while!'" Heath ordered while Rath silently left the stage. Heath noticed, from the corner of his eye, Rath give Lyn on long look before returning to his seat.

Below the stage Priscilla played random music. By accident she hit the "radio" tab and "The Reason" by Hoobastank come on. She went to change it but several girls yelled, "Leave it on!" so the play was suspended until the song ended.

"Can we start now?" Ms. Spencer demanded.

"Yes Ms. Spencer," Priscilla said, finally flipping on the music needed. Heath hoped the real sound effect and lightening person was better than Priscilla.

"'Come hither, boy. If ever thou shalt love, in the sweet pangs of it remember me; for such as I am all true lovers are, unstaid and skittish in all motions else, save in the constant image of the creature that is belov'd. How dost thou like this tune?'" Heath asked Nino who stood to one side.

"' It gives a very echo to the seat where Love is thron'd.'" Nino said, giving him a longing look. It was all theatre, Heath knew... or at least hoped. Heath liked Nino a lot, but Jaffar was way too violent for Heath's taste.

"' Thou dost speak masterly: My life upon 't, young though thou art, thine eye Hath stay'd upon some favour that it loves; Hath it not, boy?'" Heath grinned. Nino was in love, but HE knew that in the play at least it was with him. Too bad it wasn't Priscilla playing Nino. That would be perfect.

"'A... little, by your favour,'" Nino said, bowing a little to "her lord".

"' What kind of woman is 't?'" Heath asked. It was odd, asking a girl – who was obviously NOT a boy – what girl she loved. He just hoped Jaffar would remember this was a PLAY.

"' Of your complexion.'" Nino said, looking at him coyly.

"' She is not worth thee, then. What years, i' faith?'" Heath said, waving away Nino's description.

"'About your years, my lord,'"

"' Too old, by heaven!'" Heath said with feigned shock. "'Let still the woman take An elder than herself; so wears she to him, So sways she level in her husband's heart: For, boy, however we do praise ourselves, Our fancies are more giddy and unfirm, More longing, wavering, sooner lost and worn, Than women's are.'" He said, staring off into space. He was glade there were finally props on set – sitting down helped him look like he WASN'T just daydreaming.

"'I think it well, my lord.'"

"'Then let thy love be younger than thyself, Or thy affection cannot hold the bent; For women are as roses, whose fair flower, Being once display'd, doth fall that very hour.'" Heath said to Nino touching her briefly. He didn't dare let his hand linger – Jaffar would kill him.

"'And so they are: alas, that they are so; To die, even when they to perfection grow!'" Nino said with a longing sigh. Heath wondered if she was thinking about Jaffar in order to act so... realistically. He HOPED she was thinking about Jaffar...

Rath re-emerged on the stage with Matthew in tow.

"' O, fellow, come, the song we had last night. Mark it, Cesario, it is old and plain; The spinsters and the knitters in the sun, And the free maids that weave their thread with bones, Do use to chant it: it is silly sooth, And dallies with the innocence of love, Like the old age.'" He said, imperiously, pointing a finger at Nino.

"'Are you ready, sir?'" Matthew asked.

"'Ay; prithee, sing!'"

The music changed. Apparently Priscilla managed to learn how to change the CD/tape or whatever.

"'Come away, come away, death, And in sad cypress let me be laid; Fly away, fly away, breath; I am slain by a fair cruel maid. My shroud of white, stuck all with yew, O, prepare it! My part of death, no one so true Did share it.

"' Not a flower, not a flower sweet, On my black coffin let there be strown; Not a friend, not a friend greet My poor corpse, where my bones shall be thrown. A thousand thousand sighs to save, Lay me, O, where Sad true lover never find my grave, To weep there!'" Matthew was an even better singer when he did it with music. Heath narrowed his eyes. He couldn't sing that well even if he tried. That was something to work on later.

"' There 's for thy pains,'" Heath said, pantomiming tossing Matthew a coin.

"' No pains, sir; I take pleasure in singing, sir,'" Matthew said with a grin. Yeah, Matthew took a pleasure in singing – it only got him ALL the girls in class threatening to break down his door.

"' I'll pay thy pleasure, then.'" Heath said with a shrug.

"' Truly, sir, and pleasure will be paid one time or another.'" Matthew said with wide-eyed "innocence."

"'Give me now leave to leave thee,'" Heath said, his eyes drifting off to a far-away image.

"'Now the melancholy god protect thee; and the tailor make thy doublet of changeable taffeta, for thy mind is a very opal. I would have men of such constancy put to sea, that their business might be every thing, and their intent every where; for that 's it that always makes a good voyage of nothing. Farewell,'" Matthew said with a sweeping bow before leaving.

"'Let all the rest give place,'" he said when he 'noticed' everyone else was still there. Rath again left but Nino stayed where she was.

"'Once more, Cesario, get thee to yond same sovereign cruelty. Tell her my love, more noble than the world, prizes not quantity of dirty lands; the parts that fortune hath bestow'd upon her, tell her, I hold as giddily as fortune; but 't is that miracle and queen of gems that Nature pranks her in attracts my soul.'" Heath said, his voice "full of longing" for Olivia.

"'But if she cannot love you, sir?'" Nino asked timidly, looking concerned.

"'I cannot be so answer'd!'" he cried, anguish dripping from his voice.

"'Sooth, but you must. Say that some lady, as perhaps there is, hath for your love as great a pang of heart as you have for Olivia: you cannot love her; you tell her so; must she not, then, be answer'd?'" Nino said with a pained look, concern flitting across her face.

"'There is no woman's sides can bide the beating of so strong a passion as love doth give my heart; no woman's heart so big to hold so much; they lack retention. Alas, their love may be call'd appetite— no motion of the liver, but the palate— that suffer surfeit, cloyment, and revolt; but mine is all as hungry as the sea, and can digest as much. Make no compare between that love a woman can bear me and that I owe Olivia.'" Heath tried to ignore Nino's look. It was so easy to believe she WAS in love with him – she was too innocent, and a good actress. Not a good combo in high school. Especially not when she had a violent, powerful, jealous boyfriend.

"'Ay, but I know – '" She tried again.

"'What dost thou know?'" Heath snapped at her.

"'Too well what love women to men may owe; In faith, they are as true of heart as we. My father had a daughter lov'd a man, As it might be, perhaps, were I a woman, I should your lordship.'" She, of course, was her father's daughter. Just don't look at her, she has a boyfriend, she has a boyfriend, don't look at her...

"'And what's her history?'" Heath asked.

"'A blank, my lord. She never told her love, But let concealment, like a worm i' th' bud, Feed on her damask cheek; she pin'd in thought, And with a green and yellow melancholy, She sat, like patience on a monument, Smiling at grief. Was not this love indeed? We men may say more, swear more; but indeed Our shows are more than will; for still we prove Much in our vows, but little in our love.'" Nino said with a great sigh and very convincing sadness.

"'But died thy sister of her love, my boy?'" Heath asked, raising an eyebrow.

"'I am all the daughters of my father's house, And all the brothers too; and yet I know not. Sir, shall I to this lady?'" she asked, changing the topic.

"'Ay, that's the theme. To her in haste; give her this jewel; say, My love can give no place, bide no denay.'"

"Very well done, class," Ms. Spencer applauded. Yes! He WAS the best. All bow to the Mighty Heath... "All right, break time. But hurry back so we can do the next scene."
Lyn's POV

"OK, all-knowing and intelligent one, care to explain that last scene to me?" Hector asked Lyn, who gave him a half bemused, half annoyed look.

"You know, Hector, if you STAYED AWAKE during the play, you might get some of it, you know?" Eliwood said with a smirk.

"Yeah, but that's so much WORK!" Hector whined.

"Alright, Hector, fine: It starts off with – "Lyn checked her script. "Orsino observes that Cesario's in love. As we all know, "Cesario" is in love with "Orsino", but she can't TELL him that because Orsino thinks Cesario is a boy. Cesario presses on, telling him that the "woman" she loves looks and is the same age as Orsino. Orsino tells Cesario that "he'd" be better off loving a younger woman.
"Then Orsino calls for Feste – Matthew – to sing a song," Lyn trailed off a little and sighed. "Feste sings about dying for love, etc. Then, of course, Orsino orders Cesario to go back to Olivia and declare his love for her again.

"Cesario tries to remind Orsino that Olivia has denied his advances many times, and suggests that Orsino accept that Olivia is not romantically interested in him, just as a woman in love with Orsino but whom Orsino did not love would have to accept his lack of interest in her. Orsino says no woman can love with the same kind of passion as a man and Cesario disagrees. "He" tells the story of a woman "he" knew who died for the love of a man: the woman never told the man about her love but, instead, simply wasted away. Cesario tells Orsino that the girl is her father's daughter—leading Orsino, to think that it must be Cesario's sister. He asks if the girl died of her love, and Viola answers ambiguously. Orsino then gives her a jewel to present to Olivia on his behalf, and she departs." Lyn took a deep breath. "That's about it."
"Thanks Lyn!" Hector surprised her by pecking on the cheek. Lyn looked away as she turned a little red. Eliwood and Ninian snickered.
"C'mon you too – let's get out of the gym while we can. I think I'll go insane if I have to stay here much longer," Eliwood suggested, herding Ninian towards the door.
"Eliwood! Wait up!" Hector said, starting after his friend. He stopped and looked back at Lyn. "Coming?"
"Y-Yeah. I'll be right there!" she said. Hector nodded and ran to catch up. Lyn stood there for a little while trying to regulate her breathing before sprinting after her friends and – now official – boyfriend.
Whitney: guess what! I found that has the ENTIRE play ALL READY on the computer!

Erk:... soooo?

Whitney: So I can save TONS of time from not having to type! I can get things up faster!

Erk: ... wheeee.

Whitney: I hope you enjoyed chapter nine. I hope you aren't TOO annoyed with all "Ye Olde English". I try to put as much humour in here as I can.

Erk: and you are SO not successful

Whintey:... Oh well! And to elven girl-10: I might do a sequel if the demand is big enough. If you want to do one of your own, I wouldn't mind, but I'd pick a play that WASN'T written by Shakespeare :P

Nino: That's all for today!

Karla: so read and review and then do it again! :P