AUTHOR: agentj
STATUS: complete
DATE: January 2005
CATEGORY: Vignette: Challenge (write a letter from Anakin to someone for whom he cares deeply), POV (Anakin, pre-Vader)
CHARACTERS: Anakin Skywalker
TIMEFRAME: Saga: Prequel (prior or during RotS)
CONTENT WARNING: none
SUMMARY: Anakin writes a letter to his unborn child.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: Written before the release of Revenge of the Sith, it was based on the spoiler that Anakin thinks he's only having one child, and it's a girl.
DISCLAIMER: I willingly and willfully use characters and situations copyrighted by Twentieth Century Fox and Lucasfilm Ltd. without permission, and without monetary gain. Additional characters and situations are copyright 2005 Lisa D. Jenkins.
Come from somewhere so unkind?
—Kyler
My Dearest Beautiful One—
Although you are not yet among us, I sense your beauty and your life-giving energy through the mystical field of the Force. With this sense I have comes an uncertain future, a darkening of clouds beyond which I cannot yet penetrate. But know this, Little One, in my heart of hearts, I sense that you are something so beautiful, that nothing of the darkness in this galaxy can touch you.
I am torn to set my thoughts to paper. Please, do not come forth into the galaxy with the taint of my regret. I love your mother with all my might, and it pains my soul to never openly share my feelings for her, just as I fear it will tear me in two that I must also bring you into a life where you cannot know the gentle caresses of a loving father. Perhaps one day when you are old enough, you will read this and you will know the truth of what I have sacrificed for the love of you and your mother.
I fear for you, Darling One. I fear the path I have chosen, the one that will leave you fatherless—even, perhaps, motherless. But I must be mindful of the moment, as my master is always prudent to remind me. At this moment, I look over the visage of the sprawling cityscape of Coruscant, and my thoughts are all focused on you, Little One. My mind is awash with questions—will you find the secrets that press upon our lives unbearable? Will you find the faith in your heart to forgive me for bringing you into the galaxy such as this? Will I be strong enough to protect you from the wilds of the darkness that seems to encroach ever closer to our lives?
But more importantly—will you know the love I keep buried deep inside me, like a treasured pearl nestled safe in the sea?
It's with this thought that I live each day. Although I am apart from you and your mother, and each day this war drags forward brings another chance to dance carelessly before the great awning gap of the unknowable, I sense that my love will sustain you, Beautiful One. For I, unlike all other Jedi, know the true light that burns in the Force, the purity that only comes from a heart full of love.
Take this gift of my love, my own Chosen One. Know that despite the silence that rages between us, the love I have for you is true and pure. I only ask that your compassionate kindness will return the love I have given, and that one day I can be the father to you as you only dreamed I could be.
For now, and for always, my unborn daughter, the Force of my love will be with you.