Hey guys! I've finally got access to the internet again, but since I haven't been able to get on a computer until just a while ago, I only have one chapter ready. If I have the time tonight, I'll get the final chapter of Not A Word up as well.

My Only Cat: She really lost the necklace... She actually 'lost' it when the orc struck her with the blade. The necklace was pushed into her wound until it broke off. That was her worst wound, but it wasn't the only time she was struck... the only time it would have broken the skin, most likely.

Sarah: I don't know exactly how much is left, because I've been considering adding to it. If I don't, it will over in just a few chapters.

Faerlan: Leaf did grow up a bit, he's just not shown her that yet. He will, eventually. I'm considering adding another flashback soon, but I'm not sure yet. As for how she could have hide as a male... Haven't you ever seen someone, and wonder if it's a guy or a girl? The hair doesn't tell you, because so many styles are worn by either sex (let's not even get into gender), the clothes don't necessarily tell you, body shape either doesn't or isn't visible enough because of the clothes... and sometimes, even the voice doesn't clue you in. You can either think of her as someone who could, with a little practise, fit the undeturmined category, or you could think of elves as beings beyond humans, with less sexual dimorphism in their features and forms.

To Everyone else who reviewed: Thank you very much, but I don't think there were any questions/comments that needed to be addressed enough for me to put up with this extremely annoying keyboard longer than nessessary. Other than to type up the Not A Word chapter, of course.



Chapter 32

When next I opened my eyes it was to see Arwen sitting beside me. The room was dark, so I assumed someone had closed the shutters. Arwen was staring at the floor, frowning slightly. I tapped her hand, rousing her from her thoughts.

"Alyeni!" she exclaimed, moving to hug me before visibly stopping herself. "You're awake."

"Of course," I agreed softly, feeling no desire to move.

"How are you?"

"I'm fine—"

She quirked a brow and tilted her head.

I sighed, rolling my eyes. "I will be fine," I amended, "given time."

"Will you?" she asked, her eyes darkening.

Leaf. I thought about that for a while. Valar, how I loved him... But it didn't seem like much had changed since I first left Mirkwood, after all. He hadn't even trusted me enough to let me try to explain. "I've lived this long, Arwen," I sighed at last. "I don't think I'll let this destroy me."

She sent me an uncertain look, then glanced at my shoulder. "Aragorn said you were a giant bruise, a walking injury."

"A riding injury, actually," I murmured, somewhat amused. "Put an imbecilic elf in the middle of a battle and something is bound to come up a bit bruised."

"So what happened?"

I glanced up at her, frowning when I saw she hadn't heard. "You knew nothing?"

"If I hadn't been in the room when father told you Mirkwood was under attack, I wouldn't have known—Aragorn had heard nothing of it until it was explained by your friend... who insists we call him Joy." She frowned faintly. "So what happened?"

I took a careful breath, and then gave a mental shrug. "When I arrived it was to stop one elf from being killed part of the way into the forest. I carried him to the tents, and he had his armor sent back for me before I could leave. Thankfully I'd gotten him there in time." He'd lived, but only by the grace of everything holy. "Then I unloaded the other horse, and set them both to work carrying the injured to the healers, and fell into line. That idiot elf of a ruler was on the lines with no guard whatsoever, so I fought next to him... and for a long while, I thought I'd given my life over for his."

"How so?" she asked quietly, frowning.

"Did Estel not explain that as well?" I asked with a sigh. "He was attacked by three at once, and could only hold one at bay. I was down to one blade... but managed to hold them off."

"That's how you were injured?" she asked, eyes widening.

"Yes," I agreed with a quiet sigh.

She got the oddest look on her face. "Thranduil was aware of this?"

"I don't know how he could possibly not know. I fell against him, yelled practically into his ear for the others to come protect him... as my own strength was failing." Slowly I eased myself upright, monitoring my breathing to minimize the pain. "Now, if you would... I think some movement would help."

"Oh... Alright," she agreed, reading in my eyes I wasn't going to give up on this, whether she protested or not. "You're quite stubborn, you know."

I laughed softly. "So I've been told," I agreed.

She led me out to the walkway above the rest of the city, walking with me as slowly my body agreed it could move. Once I was walking as well as I had been before rest stiffened me, she loosened her hold on me, remaining at my side as if still expecting me to fall. I think the guards were wary of me—after all, an apparently male elf came and caused quite a stir in their hall, then went for a casual walk with their queen, who was oddly attentive.

I snorted at the very idea, and turned to look over the city. "How does it feel?"

She sighed softly, looking with me at the land she now helped rule. "I love him... that is all that matters.

Interpreting that for myself as her way of saying she wasn't overly thrilled with being a queen among men and doomed to die but didn't regret her decision, I nodded slightly. "That's good," I murmured, turning to walk again.

Arwen turned with me, obviously considering something since I sincerely doubted her feet were that interesting. "Have you spoken with Legolas since the feast?"

I smiled faintly. "I've been awake twice since then, once for a matter of minutes with Joy getting angry with me, and Estel getting angrier at my father."

She blinked, opened her mouth, and then closed it, shaking her head slightly, letting go of whatever curiosity my comment had evoked. "Joy was quite upset with Legolas when he came from your room. He ranted for a few minutes, which of course did nothing but make Legolas more determined to believe whatever had been fixed in his own mine, and then with a mutter of disgust threw a letter at him much as you had thrown his ring." She walked quietly for a few minutes, obviously not yet finished. "Legolas looked at the letter, picked it up with a shake of his head and was about to cast it away when he saw the seal. Even from where I was I could see his hand shook slightly as he broke his father's seal. As he read his father's message, the anger in his eyes died, replaced by such sorrow I never thought to see it in any elf's eyes, even in such times as we are in. I think even the human servants saw and recognized it."

Some bitter part of me wanted to reply it was no doubt sorrow that he would not be king any time soon, but I knew him too well to utter it, ashamed for even beginning to think it. Still, I had nothing to say. "I've not seen him," I murmured finally.

She sighed. "I think you should talk to him."

I smiled, a weary smile. "I've been trying to talk to him for years, Arwen. Every time I think I'm getting somewhere something happens, and we're back at the beginning, with nothing to show for it except a few more bruises."

Silence held us for a long while, as we made another turn. "He was looking forward to seeing you, Alyeni."

"I wanted to see him," I admitted, "but his eagerness didn't last long, did it?"

"He hadn't known Mirkwood was attacked! My father said nothing!"

"And neither did you, obviously, if even Estel didn't know why I failed to show up!" I took a deep breath and began walking a bit faster. "What does it matter if he didn't know? Couldn't he have trusted I would come when I could?"

"How many times have you run away from him? From what has been growing between you?"

I ground my teeth together and kept walking.

"You're doing it even now!" she called from somewhere behind me.

I turned to see she'd stopped walking. Slowly I walked back to her. "Arwen," I murmured quietly, surprising us both with my calm tones, "I have run. First, because if he'd gotten any closer I was afraid it would be too close, when close wasn't allowed. I was too late, that time. The second time I ran was because he treated me as an utter fool and a child, someone not to be trusted with so much as delivering a sheet of blank paper halfway across a room. I tried talking with him, arguing with him, but nothing worked. This time I ran—but only to help save our home, and instead of giving me so much as half a chance to explain, he assumes the worst and turns into a block of ice. I'm tired of it!" I looked out at the city before us, encompassing it with a quick move—of my right arm, which hurt more than I would ever admit—and looked back at her for a moment. "This is not why you're here, is it?"

The answer shown in her eyes in an instant.

"How am I to convince him of that? That I would be just as happy—if not happier—if he was just another elf, instead of the blood prince?" With a sigh all my anger seeped from my body. "I don't know anymore, Arwen. All I know is it hurts so much more to love him like this than it did to believe I was going to die in that battle, watching as everything in my vision turned to black, the trees—my home—burning around me, unable to do anything more than fight for one minute longer in the hope that his father—not the King—would be well."

She came up, standing silently beside me for the longest of times without a word. She left only when Estel came to collect her for the meal.

Neither bothered to invite me, knowing I wouldn't be hungry.