The Vedran's Flaw (comic)
The three of them were quite an unusual sight for patrons of the small drift bar. Vedrans sitting on either side of a human who was buying drinks as quickly as they could drink them and asking questions the entire time. The bartender had been edging his way down towards their end of the bar ever since it became obvious that the Vedrans were getting a little drunk. Even a year after the rediscovery of Tarn Vedra Vedrans were a sight worth staring at, especially drunk Vedrans. The human, a local small time scam artist, was asking the Vedrans about how Tarn Vedra got cut off from slipstream, a notoriously touchy subject.
They seemed to be enjoying the company of their new 'friend', and more importantly enjoying the drinks his thrones were buying them. Life was good, the alcohol was potent, and sharing stories seemed to the most natural thing in the world.
"Well let me tell you Goran, you are Goran right?" The human nodded, though his name was actually Gollen, but who is going to argue with a drunk Vedran? "Well, Goran it's a long story. It was the perfect plan really. Our most brilliant minds went through hundreds of scenarios to determine the best way to protect Tarn Vedra from both the Nietzscheans and the Magog. We weren't being selfish either, once we knew the plan worked we had every intention of sharing it with the rest of the Commonwealth. Even if the whole Nietzschean problem that made us vulnerable to the Magog was the fault of you humans." The Vedran was becoming animated, ill advised for a creature his size, especially while drinking. Several patrons were forced to duck fists and spilled alcohol. He pounded his nearly empty glass on the bar for emphasis. "But we don't hold grudges, no we Vedrans are above all that..." The Vedran looked at his glass in surprise, "Oopsie, I seem to have spilled my drink a little, I don't suppose you could, ah thank you Goran, most generous of you."
Gollen paid for the Vedran's 7th Zombie of the evening and waited. And waitied.
The Vedran stared into space for a full 3 minutes, sucking down almost half his drink. "Where was I? Brilliant minds, stupid humans, Magog... ahh yes the plan. It really was brilliant. We were the first to discover and use the slipstream you know, and no one understands it as well as we do. Then again, no one can ever fully comprehend it. The beautiful twists of actuality and possibility, reality and dream, time and space, it really is a maze with no stable solution. But the slipstream is in our blood, we know it as well as we know the mountains and valleys and waterways of our home planet. We... well anyway, the plan. Our scientists realized that we couldn't defend the planet with weapons, we knew all about the Magog World Ship, and we weren't crazy enough to think we could mess with that and survive. So we had to come up with a way of avoiding that ship altogether, and preferably the Nietzscheans too. Though personally I think we could have taken them. I mean they have those bone blade things, but we have four legs and we just look way cooler, ya know?"
The Vedran was now staring mournfully into his almost empty glass. Gollen realized that he was never going to hear the rest of the story if his companion had any more to drink, so rather than signaling the bartender again he tried prompting the Vedran. "So you did cut Tarn Vedra off intentionally, to prevent everyone from reaching you?"
That got a reaction out of the Vedran. "NO! No, of course not. Why would we give up on an empire we spent thousands of years creating? No, our scientists came up with a far more brilliant plan. They devised a way to move the whole planet through slipstream. I know, you're thinking, that's impossible!, but how do you think Magog World Ship moves around the galaxies? We've never seen it, but there is no way they could have gotten as far as they did without using slipstream at least a few times. No way man. In any case, our scientists did it, figured out a way to use the planet's own gravitation field as propulsion within the slipstream. We couldn't move the sun though, but we figured we'd just come out of slipstream near a sun and that would be good enough. Unfortunately creating a portal large enough to move the planet and using warped gravity fields for propulsion does damage the slipstream and make it impossible to use the exit ever again, but what did that matter? It was such a brilliant plan, and slipstream travel is in our blood."
Gollen couldn't believe it. It all made sense though, the old routes not functioning, the mad Perseid's crazy route that made no sense, the planet being situated in a system totally unlike the one the old records described. But one thing still bothered the human. "So, after you moved the planet and escaped why did you stay hidden, I thought you said you didn't want to give up the empire?"
The Vedran mumbled something into his glass as he tried to drain the last few drops from the bottom.
Gollen leaned towards the Vedran, trying to catch what he was saying. "I'm sorry, what was that?"
The poor human nearly jumped out of his seat when the Vedran on his other side spoke. She hadn't said a word since Gollen had met them in the market and offered to buy them a drink. "He said we weren't hiding, we were lost. Our brilliant scientists hadn't fully compensated for the effect of such a large body on the slipstream. After the first jump we came out in the middle of nowhere. The next time we came out near an inhabited planet. But would our glorious leaders stop and ask them where we were and how to get for the system we had been aiming for? Nooooo, they said they didn't need directions. Isn't that true dear? They said they knew exactly where they were going. Never mind that I was the appointed navigator and they couldn't read a map to save their lives, no, our pilot said he knew how to get to the target system. Said that after every jump for a century. By them time he finally admitted he had never known where we were it was so hopeless we just stopped the next time we came out near a sun. If that new Commonwealth exploration ship hadn't come across us we'd still be lost."
The male Vedran was resting his head on the bar, obviously already regretting the evening, while it was just as obvious that the female Vedran was only beginning to get worked up. Gollen was no idiot, he quietly paid the remaining tab and got out of there.