Author's Notes: Just something I wrote to cheer me up about Sirius's death. I absolutely adore Sirius/Remus. Go easy on me, because this is the first S/R I've ever written. Reviews much appreciated, fanart worshipped.
Disclaimer: The Harry Potter books belong to J.K Rowling. I am only a poor fanfic writer who writes to improve my skills. I would never make money off of somebody else's work.
PG-13, Sirius/Remus. If you don't like the pairing, don't read it.
With that out of the way, let's get started!
Beyond The Veil
Remus Lupin sat upon his bed in 12 Grimmauld Place. It was quiet for now; after the events in the Department of Mysteries, the Ministry of Magic had finally accepted that Voldemort had returned. Dumbledore and the rest of the Order were out smoothing over relations and trying to calm people down.
But what a price they had had to pay to get them to listen, Remus thought, holding onto a bottle of Muggle alcohol. His mind flashed to that moment when Sirius had been fighting Bellatrix Lestrange, and, taken unawares by a spell, had been thrown backwards through the veil, to a place he could never return from.
Sirius… gone. It was hard for him to imagine that just that afternoon they'd been making love in these very rumpled sheets he sat upon now. Worse still, there was no body to bury, nothing to force Remus to accept that Sirius was dead. Every creak of the ancient house would make him jump; make him dart to the window to see if anyone was there. He was always disappointed by the empty street below.
Evening fell, a gloom that seemed more fitting to Remus's feelings than the pale sunlight that had shone in the daytime. He took another swig from the bottle, hoping to drown out the bittersweet memories and thoughts that invaded his mind, the impossible hope that somehow Sirius would find a way back to them.
Of course, they called it the Death Room for a reason. But what if they had been wrong? What if it led to another place, some place that Sirius could return from in time? He couldn't give up on Sirius just like that. Not after all they had been through. They'd been so happy once, back in Hogwarts, before Azkaban had torn them apart. 13 years later they'd been given another chance, a second chance to make it right; even through Azkaban had changed Sirius, he was healing over time. Then it had all been torn away from them again.
It just seemed too cruel to be real.
The door creaked open behind him and Remus turned around quickly, and was disappointed but surprised to see none other than Albus Dumbledore in the doorway.
"May I come in?" he inquired, in his usual calm, relaxed tone.
Remus nodded; still fighting down the lump in his throat that had risen when the door had opened. He set down the beer bottle on the cabinet and gestured to a chair for Dumbledore to sit in. Dumbledore glided across the room and sat down.
There was a peaceful silence for a few minutes, then Dumbledore began.
"Are you aware of what is behind the veil, Remus?"
"Death, the other side, whatever you want to call it, I presume," Remus answered sadly, "I know, he can't come back… but I can't help just thinking…" He brought a hand up to brush his hair back.
"It is true that none have ever returned from the dead, Remus. I need you to understand that. Harry depends on you now; he depends on you accepting Sirius' death so that he may come to understand it too." Dumbledore sat still while Remus absorbed the information.
"How can I just accept it? We don't even have a body to bury, I can't even look upon him one final time and bid him goodbye, Albus. How can I tell Harry what he needs to hear when I can't understand it myself?" He put his head in his hands.
"Remus, life must continue. We have a job to do. Sirius would want you to protect Harry, just as he did." Dumbledore said.
"Then find a way to bring him back." Remus demanded.
"Remus, you know that is not possible." Dumbledore sighed.
"Not possible? Or are you just unwilling? Can't we use a Time Turner or something?" Remus tried.
"You know already that we do not use a Time Turner, or Sirius would never have fallen into the veil. And the reason we can't is that there is no way to avoid being seen. The repercussions of that could tear apart the fabric of space and time itself, and would you destroy the world, just to see Sirius again?" Dumbledore explained.
"Right now," Remus said, "I would do anything to see Sirius again. I would give anything to bring him back, not just for me, but for Harry too."
"Some things are just not possible. And even if they were, how can we know that Sirius's death wasn't supposed to happen, that it doesn't inspire some great event like the destruction of Voldemort in the future? If you affect something as great as life and death, you could cause massive damage to the future."
"You know…" Remus began, "Just last week, I went and bought rings. After everything was over, after Voldemort was dead and Sirius had his name cleared, I was going to give him his ring. Now… Now I can't. I want to see him again… I just want to know that behind that veil he's all right."
Dumbledore nodded and gave a small sigh, before reaching into the pocket of his robes, "I foresaw this possibility," he said, pulling out a small star shaped pendant with a pink stone set into the centre of it and pressing it into Remus's hands.
"What is it?" Remus asked.
"It is a pendant that Nicholas Flamel created with the Sorcerer's Stone," Dumbledore replied, "It gives the owner protection from death for twenty-four hours. He created it just in case he needed to delay his death a little longer once his elixir ran out. It was the last thing he created with the Sorcerer's Stone before it was destroyed.
"Does this mean… I can go through the veil?" Remus asked, uncertainly. He couldn't believe what he was hearing.
"That is quite correct," Dumbledore answered, "However, I do not know what you will find there. Death is not something I have experienced, and I cannot give you any advice. You will have only 24 hours after you enter the veil. If you take longer, the jewel will shatter and death will claim you. Its colour will change as time goes on, turning from pink, to blue, to green, to yellow, to orange and finally to red. Once it turns red, make sure to leave immediately."
"But how can I… bring Sirius back?" Remus asked.
"I do not know if it is even possible," Dumbledore admitted, "You will have to find out for yourself how it is done, if you can. Either way, you must hurry. When the Ministry settles down from the turmoil it is in, you will probably be unable to sneak into the Department of Mysteries. Do not be caught with the pendant; such things are highly illegal due to the changes they can cause."
Remus turned over the pendant in his hand. The silver star shone brightly, and the pink jewel in the middle lay dormant, "How do I activate it?" he asked, still unsure, his stomach turning with all the possibilities. Would he see Sirius again? Would he be able to bring him home? Would he live to return himself?
"You must wear it, tap it with your wand, and speak the password; "Chocolate Frog", Dumbledore instructed. He stood to leave.
"I am a busy man, Remus, so I hope you will excuse me?" Dumbledore asked.
Remus nodded and put the pendant in his pocket, standing himself. He had a job to do, too.
Dumbledore turned in the doorway, "No matter what you see, Remus, do not forget that there are people here who need you. Harry and the Order depend on you, and I trust that you will not forget that."
Before Remus could open his mouth to answer, Dumbledore was gone.
Remus looked up at the Ministry of Magic. It had only been a day, and now he was returning to this place, the place he hoped he would never have to see again, the place Sirius had died. He entered the red phone box and dialed the number that would give him access to the Ministry.
"What is your business at the Ministry?" the voice asked, and Remus was stuck. What could he say?
"I'm here for the one I love," he said, and a visitors badge popped out from the coin slot with the words "Romantic Reunion" written on it.
Not exactly what I said, he thought, but close enough.
The main hall of the Ministry was a scene of chaos; people were clearing debris away from the toppled statues, others were rushing to and fro with information about Death Eaters, some were whispering and gossiping about the events of the other night, when Voldemort had Apperated into this very hall and dueled with Dumbledore.
In the chaos and confusion, Remus could walk unnoticed. He made it to the elevator, which opened to a rush of people who all spilled out into the entrance hall. He got into the empty elevator and pressed the number for the Department of Mysteries. He closed his eyes as the elevator started to move, his stomach churning with anticipation. He couldn't believe he was actually going beyond the veil, that he was going to see Sirius again. His heart leapt, and that hope mingled with the fear that he may not come home again.
The elevator stopped with a ding, and the door slid open. Remus stepped out and went straight ahead. He'd expected someone to be guarding the door to the department, but nobody seemed to be around. He tried the door and it opened, and he stepped into the room. The door closed and all the doors moved around the wall, stopping finally.
"The Death Room," Remus stated, and the doors shifted again. He went through the door that opened, taking a deep breath.
The room spread out before him, the raised dais, the veil where even now, small voices invited him, begged him to enter the veil. He could see the last time he had been in this room. The burn marks on the floor, the broken prophesy suddenly came to life in his mind and there they were, fighting the Death Eaters once more. He saw Sirius thrown back into the Veil by Bellatrix's spell, saw himself holding Harry back so he wouldn't throw himself in after his godfather, all while he was falling apart himself, seeing the light of his life go out.
The memories died, and he stepped forward, pulling the pendant from his pocket and putting it over his head. He hesitated a moment, looking into the veil, listening to the voices to see if he could hear Sirius, but he could not. Doubt filled him again. How did he even know he would end up in the right place? Even Dumbledore had no idea if it would work or not. But what other choice did he have? He could go back to Grimmauld Place, work for the Order, but he would never know what became of Sirius, and he would always be alone. A life without Sirius… a life he did not want to contemplate. If there was any chance, even a slim one, that he could find Sirius, he would take it.
He nodded to himself, and raised his wand, tapping the pendant and speaking the password. He felt the pendant glow warm on his chest, and turn a deep pink. He took a deep breath in and stepped forward.
"Sirius…" he whispered, and the veil fluttered behind him.
He found himself standing in a dark room. Looking around, he could see that there was a reception desk where a bored witch was scribbling on pieces of parchment, and two tunnels either side of her. He stepped up to the reception desk.
"Excuse me…" he began nervously.
The witch looked up in horrified surprise, "Who are you? There isn't supposed to be another wizarding death until 5:30 this afternoon! Did you die earlier than your appointed time? Oh dear, this will cause so much trouble…"
"I'm not due to die at all," Remus said calmly, "I'm here to see Sirius Black."
"Not due to die? You mean you're still alive? How could that be? Has there been some kind of mistake?" The receptionist looked flustered, "You're not Luno Puddlebottom, are you? He's the only death scheduled for today."
"No," Remus said, "I'm not dead, I think… I just came to see someone."
"Not dead?" exclaimed the receptionist, "That's impossible! Perhaps you're just in denial. Perhaps it was a nasty accident? You are quite young to die; I guess you left loved ones behind. Don't worry, you'll be okay."
"I'm really not dead," Remus continued, "Now, could you just tell me where Sirius Black is? Or James and Lily Potter?" He hadn't thought of seeing them, but then, why not? He missed them too, and he would like to tell them how Harry was doing.
"You're sure you're not dead?" she asked.
"Quite sure." Remus sighed. Was he going to get an answer from the witch, or not?
"Then why are you here?" She scratched her hair with her quill.
"I came to see Sirius Black. He died suddenly, fell through the veil. I just wanted to see him one more time." He decided to leave out the part about taking him back, just in case it caused trouble.
"Ah, the man from yesterday! Yes, he was an unexpected arrival too. You knew him?" The receptionist chewed on her quill now.
"He was… Yes, I knew him." Remus replied. He felt the pendant glow warm on his breast and saw it turn blue. How much time had he wasted talking to this witch?
"Special to you, was he? He wouldn't calm down. Kept screaming that he shouldn't be dead, that he had to protect Harry, that he hadn't told Remus he loved him before he left. Quite a sad case, when they come in like that." She sighed.
"I'm Remus," he said, "Remus Lupin. Sirius Black was my lover."
"Well, why didn't you say! Oh, I love a good reunion! Take the tunnel on the right and open the twenty-sixth bottle on row three-thousand-three-hundred." She smiled. "Oh, and if you'll be leaving again, you'll only need to take the portal inside your friend's resting place to return to your world." She sighed, "This is against the rules, you know. But it's been so boring here lately! Somebody needs to be happy."
Remus thanked her and hurried through the tunnel on the right which led out into a huge, cavernous room, full of shelves. On each shelf was a jar containing a gentle blue glow. The rows were labeled, and Remus rushed down the rows, looking for row 3300.
It seemed an age before he found it, and to his dismay he felt the pendant glow warm again and turn green. Time was running out, and he suspected the flow of time was different here to his own world, since he could not have been there more than an hour or so.
The bottles on this row were clean and new, dust had not yet covered them. He picked up the last bottle on the shelf and saw the name "Sirius Black".
It was empty.
He pulled out the stopper; nothing happened. He put it back in and sighed. Sirius wasn't here. He was gone, somehow, and all this had been for nothing.
He was about to replace the bottle on the shelf and go home when he saw a small blue glow growing from inside the bottle. It grew and grew until it filled the bottle, and Remus pulled out the stopper with renewed hope. He felt himself being sucked inside, and everything went black.
Remus stood in the Hogwarts grounds, and looked around. Everything looked as it should, the leaves blew in the wind, the grass was green. The Whomping Willow flailed its branches to keep out intruders, and the giant squid swam in the lake.
Usually, it would be full of students, but it was deathly quiet. He walked forward a few meters, then broke into a run. Something was not right. Hogwarts was never silent, only at night, and it was midday.
He saw three shadows sitting under a tree; his favourite. It had been the place where he and Sirius used to sit and kiss, away from most prying eyes.
He rushed closer, "Sirius? Sirius, is that you? Padfoot?"
The figures came into view and he saw Sirius, James and Lily sitting beneath the tree, all younger and in their Hogwarts robes. He looked down and saw he was still wearing his patched grey robes that he had bought second-hand.
Sirius stopped wildly gesticulating to James and stood up as he saw Remus.
Remus! What are you doing here?" he said, half happy, half annoyed, "What happened to you? You didn't die because of me…"
"I'm not dead," Remus said, a little annoyed. He had hoped for a slightly more enthusiastic greeting from the man he loved.
"You're not dead," Sirius said, relieved. He rushed to Remus and embraced him, and as he did, the scene changed and Sirius was older again. They were sitting in the Shrieking Shack, and James and Lily were there too, still as young as the day they died.
"Sorry," James said, "This is as old as we ever got," but he was smiling as he put his arm around Lily.
Remus smiled. Here they were again, together, all except Wormtail, but then he didn't deserve to be here after what he had done.
"You weren't in the bottle when I picked it up. I thought I might never find you." Remus said, his voice hoarse. It seemed too much for them to be here, the people he loved more than anyone else in the world. He could barely cope with seeing Sirius, after seeing him slip through the veil, fall away from him.
"I was visiting James and Lily," Sirius smiled, "Sorry if I kept you waiting. They've been showing me how things work around here."
James laughed, "You're still a quick learner, Padfoot."
Padfoot. It struck Remus, hearing James call Sirius by his nickname again. For a second, they were Moony, Padfoot and Prongs again, back in the best moments of their lives.
The warmth of the pendant startled him as it glowed warmly against his chest. Yellow. Half his time was up, and he still hadn't found a way to get Sirius home.
"Moony, Padfoot, we're going to head back to our own place for a little while," James said, obviously realizing they wanted to spend some time alone. "Just call us when you need us," he said, and both he and Lily faded from view.
"Remus…" Sirius said, once they had faded, and pulled him into a deep kiss. They stayed like that, not wanting to breathe or think about anything else. Eventually they parted, and Sirius eyed Remus with a questioning gaze.
"So, how exactly did you get here and still live, and how long do you have?" Sirius said.
Remus flinched, Sirius was always direct. Too direct, sometimes, but in a way it made the explaining easier to do.
"Dumbledore gave me this pendant," he said, gesturing to the silver star around his neck. "It will protect me from dying for 24 hours, although time seems to move differently here. It enabled me to pass through the veil without dying, but the colours are changing faster than they should. There's only orange and red left, and when it turns red I must leave, or face dying myself." He looked around him. "Not that it seems so bad, to die."
Sirius smiled, that gruff smile through his beard he had always had. Something looked different about him, but Remus couldn't figure out what had changed.
"It has its good points," Sirius agreed.
They sat there quietly for a few minutes, Remus's hand stroking Sirius's beard. He kissed Sirius's face again and again, wishing he knew what was so different about it, what he couldn't place, but he let it slip from his mind.
"I've come to take you home, Sirius," he said, "Back to Harry, and the Order, and the others. I don't know how yet, but I'll find a way."
Sirius smiled, "I forgot to tell you, before I left… how much I love you. It's sometimes difficult to say, after all those years suppressing my good memories and emotions in Azkaban, but I should have said it."
Remus leaned in for another kiss, when he saw something appearing out of the corner of his eye.
A figure slowly appeared, and Remus realized it was the receptionist witch.
"I'm sorry to interrupt," she said, "but I know how you can return him to your world. It's against all the rules, but you're not even supposed to be here, either of you. Due to that, you should be able to pass through the portal to your own world without harm. Beware, though. You cannot take anybody else with you."
"Where exactly is this portal, anyway?" Remus asked.
"The lake in your memory… in the Hogwarts grounds is a portal," she replied. "Through it, you can see events going on in your own world. Just jump in, and you will be able to return." She jumped, "Oh, got to go!" she said, and she faded from view just as Lily and James had done.
"I guess I will be able to see Harry again, after all," Sirius smiled, and they both visibly relaxed. Sirius would be going home, and they both knew how to get there. Remus sighed with relief and cuddled up to Sirius, who held him close.
"You came all this way, risking your own life, just for me?" Sirius asked.
"Moony missed Padfoot, wouldn't believe that he could be dead," Remus replied, ruffling Sirius's hair, "Shall we spend some time with Lily and James, before we go? They won't be able to come with us."
Sirius nodded. Just then, they appeared, and the scene changed. They were in class again, in History of Magic. Sirius and James were bored, and Remus was chewing on the end of his quill. Wormtail was absent from the memory, and Remus wondered if it was because he hadn't been there, because he wasn't dead, or because they had blocked him out of it.
"This is the time you put those Dungbombs under Snape's chair," Remus grinned.
"Why are you grinning? I recall you chewing us out for weeks about how cruel it was," James smiled.
"Still got us out of detention, though, didn't you, Moony?" Sirius grinned.
"Yeah, I told Professor Binns they weren't your dungbombs. I still can't believe he actually thought I was telling the truth, though." He smiled. Those days had been so good, the best of his life.
Even Lily smiled, "You were cruel to him back then, but you grew up in the end. I have to admit, it was pretty funny."
Remus felt the heat on his chest again, and the pendant changed to orange.
"Sirius," he said, "When it turns red, we have to leave. We don't have long left."
"You're going with him?" James asked.
"He's found a way to take me back. I can look after Harry for you, take care of him," Sirius said. Lily looked happy at the thought, but James appeared a little disappointed. He quickly pushed it aside.
"Well, I guess if you're going to go, you should do it now," James said, "I guess I can't come too?"
"Sirius is here by accident, and I'm not really dead," Remus explained, "I'm sorry," but James shook his head.
"I expected as much," he said, "Besides, Lily and I have been here so long I'm not sure we could settle back in. It makes sense, since dead people aren't supposed to come back to life. Our resurrection could cause lots of trouble."
"We have to jump into the lake," Sirius said, "James, Lily, could you meet us there in a few minutes? I just wanted to talk to Remus."
"Sure!" They said, and faded from view again.
"Are you okay with this Sirius? I mean, leaving James and Lily here alone… You don't have to come back, if you don't want to." He couldn't believe he was saying it, but how could he drag Sirius back if he didn't want to go? He hadn't counted on the afterlife being a place one would want to go.
"No, I do want to go," Sirius said, "I just wanted you to think of your favourite memory, while we can still recall them in this way."
Remus thought deeply. There had been so many good memories, so many good times before everything went wrong.
"The time we first realized we loved each other," he said, "Do you remember?"
They were back in the Shrieking Shack again, and gentle morning sunlight was pouring in through the windows. It was the morning after one of Remus's werewolf transformations, and he lie naked under a sheet on the bed after turning back into his human form.
Padfoot sat beside the bed, wagging his tail happily. James and Peter had been in detention, so only Sirius had been there to accompany him this time. They had gone outside, and raced each other through the forest, wild and free. It had been exhilarating, and it had made Sirius realize how much he would miss it all if Remus ever left his life. James was like a brother, and Peter a good friend, but it was Remus who had always been there, the quiet one, never complaining about what he had to suffer through every full moon.
Padfoot, contented that Remus had fully returned to his normal self, turned back into Sirius. He was naked, but then they had grown used to this and it no longer bothered them that they were naked after turning back from their animal forms. He knelt beside the sleeping form of Remus in the bed and gently stroked his face where he had cut himself on a branch. Standing, Sirius went to a shelf and poured some essence of mertlap from a bottle, and returned with a full bowl to Remus's side. Taking a cloth, he gently put some of the mertlap on the scratch, and Remus stirred.
"That's cold…" he muttered, "Padfoot, is that you?"
"Stay still Moony," Sirius said gently. "You scratched yourself on a branch last night when we were out."
"That was amazing, wasn't it?" Remus said, smiling a little.
"The wind through our fur, the race through the branches, it was brilliant," Sirius grinned, remembering the night.
"You won the race," Remus smiled, "That's quite something, the way you've adapted to being a dog so quickly. You don't know how much it means to me…" he trailed off, embarrassed.
"I think I should be thanking you," Sirius said, "If it wasn't for you, I'd never have learned to become an Animagus, and we'd never be having all this fun. These are the best times of my life, you know, being with you, helping you…"
"I'm glad you enjoy it. Sometimes I feel guilty for letting you become unregistered Animagi, just for me. If anyone found out, you would be expelled." Remus replied.
"It would be worth it," Sirius said sincerely, looking into Remus's eyes. Remus looked back, surprised at what he was seeing. It wasn't for Sirius to come over all emotional like this.
"Are you feeling all right?" Remus asked.
"I feel great, better than I've ever felt," he replied, and it was true. Just him and Remus, together, alone. They rarely had moments like this, because James took up most of his time with some new trick he had planned. Sirius didn't mind, but he liked spending time with Remus. He encouraged his quieter, more thoughtful side to come out, which was a welcome change from the usual bedlam that he created with James.
They were quiet for a moment, an uneasy silence while each read the other tentatively; trying to discern what was on the other's mind. They never really noticed that they were moving closer to each other until their lips met, and the first moment's shock gave way to a powerful, mutual kiss. They pulled apart for air.
"How long have you felt this way, Moony?" Sirius asked.
"A long time. Perhaps even from that first moment I met you on the train, I knew that there was something different about you than everyone else. I love Prongs and Wormtail, but in a different way, like brothers…" He breathed in, "When did you start feeling like this?"
"I've felt something for a little while but last night cemented it; put the final piece in place. I held off, I thought it might be one of my passing fancies, but I didn't want to ruin our friendship if it was. But it's stayed and grown stronger over time." Sirius leaned back in for another kiss…
Remus pulled his eyes away from the memory, "We really need to go, Sirius," he said, "I don't know when this thing will change colour and I want to say goodbye to Lily and James before we go."
Sirius nodded, and they were before the lake. They walked down to where Lily and James were sitting peering into the still waters. Remus looked into the water and reeled back – he could see Harry on the other side, with his friends in the hospital wing at Hogwarts.
"Can you see everything from here?" Remus asked, and Lily nodded.
"You just have to think about whom you want to see, and they will appear," Lily said, "We've been watching over Harry all these years, seeing him grow up. I don't approve of the way my sister's been looking after him, but it's not like we have any other choice."
"Would you like me to say something to the Dursleys, keep a closer eye on Harry?" Remus asked.
"Yes please," replied Lily, "Just tell them that you're watching them."
Remus turned to Sirius, then finally realized what had changed about him. All the years that Azkaban had put on him had fallen away, the lines, the hollow eyes had disappeared, and he honestly looked happy when he looked at James and Lily. Instead of the mere shadow of a man he had been, he was complete again, with his friends, with his memories, where he belonged.
Sirius looked directly into Remus's eyes, and he understood what Sirius was trying to say, and what he had been trying to do. He had come here to take Sirius home, but where was home? The real world was full of pain, isolation and misery for him, stuck in Grimmauld Place, unable to go out as he was still believed to be a killer. Was it fair to return him to that prison of a life, just so that Remus could keep him close?
He knew it wasn't.
"You can't come with me," Remus said, and the Potters looked at him strangely, then they looked at Sirius and understood.
"I can't take you back to that world of suffering. You belong here now, with Lily and James," he said with difficulty. Oh, how he wanted to take Sirius back to hold him close, to make love to him every hour, but he knew he couldn't. It wasn't right to snatch him out of Heaven and make him survive on Earth.
Sirius nodded slowly, then rushed forward and took Remus in his arms and into a deep kiss, which he returned with all of his being. They stood there kissing and holding on until Remus felt warmth from the pendant again. He didn't need to look to know it was red now. He parted from Sirius and reached into his pocket, pulling out a small package.
"Just one more thing before I go," he said, and he unfolded the package to reveal two gold rings, shaped like wedding bands.
"When all of this was over," he said, "I was going to ask you…" but the words stuck in his throat. He took Sirius's hand and slid one of the rings onto his finger. Sirius nodded, the words also unable to come out. Sirius took the other ring and put it on Remus's finger, then took his hand and kissed it tenderly.
He turned to the Potters "Lily, James, I'll come back someday. I promise I'll take care of Harry for you. Look after Sirius for me." They nodded, and he turned to Sirius.
"Wait for me, Sirius," he said, and took Sirius into one last quick hug. Standing with his back to the lake, he let himself fall backwards into the water, through the portal to the mortal world. Falling, falling away from Sirius and the waving Potters, he felt himself pass through to the other side, and then backwards down the steps from the dais, to land on the floor of the Department of Mysteries with a hard thud. The pendant shattered into a million fragments, its energy spent, just like his heart was breaking at the knowledge he would not see Sirius for the rest of his life.
He picked himself up off the floor and cried to the veil, "I love you, Sirius Black!"
He could have sworn that he heard Sirius whisper back, but he could never be sure of it.
Remus stood at the station, watching Harry. He'd just had a talk to the Dursleys, to make sure they wouldn't cause Harry too much grief over the summer. He was pretty sure Mad-Eye Moody's swirling magical eye had done the trick.
He'd felt like telling Harry about his trip, but his grief was still too new. He wouldn't understand why Remus had needed to leave Sirius in that place, might resent him for it. He'd been through enough pain, and didn't need any more. Someday he would let him know, when the time was right, that Sirius was in a better place now, a place where nothing could hurt him. A place where he was finally at peace.
The next time he saw Dumbledore, he got only a small smile from him. Did he know what he had seen? He never asked why Sirius hadn't returned with him, and when Remus tried to tell him, he had just silenced him with a small nod and changed the subject to something else.
Sometimes he would look at the ring on his finger, and remember where Sirius had kissed his hand. He looked back upon their memories fondly now, without pain. He missed Sirius, but he knew one day he would see him again and they would live in that place, together for all eternity.
But for now, life went on. The Order needed him and so did Harry Potter, and he knew he'd better keep his promises, because Sirius, James and Lily were surely watching him.
He would try not to disappoint them.
Fin