Title: Scratch the Surface
Author: WildCherry45
Notes: Set after LIAGH. Season 1!
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Life had that funny way of getting to you, surprising you with the craziest scenarios at the worst times. In those moments, reality always seems to slip away, fading into the background and all that's left is your imagination. In those few silent seconds, your wildest dreams can come true or your nightmares can take over. Chaos reigns free and it all becomes unpredictable. One moment, the world is perfect and life is normal and the next everything changes. It feels like the world keeps spinning but everything is shifted so horrendously off axis and you're the only one who notices.
As I'm sitting on the café floor, my head leaned against the back of the counter, my brown eyes staring lifelessly into the black and empty kitchen, I can't help but wonder how I got to this moment. I retrace the steps in my head and go back, bit by bit, clinging onto the desperate hope that maybe I was just imagining it all and that I didn't fall for his tricks; that I, Haley James, was smarter than the average resident student who attended Tree Hill High School.
I wipe the tears away from my face and stare at my fingers lined with drops of pain. I'm mesmerized for a moment, silently wondering why I'm even crying. He's not worth it, I try to tell myself. Anybody who would do that to me isn't worth it. Anybody who causes me that much pain in that short of a period isn't worth the effort or the time. But, I can't seem to convince myself. A small part of me inside doesn't believe in his betrayal, doesn't believe that he's capable of something so cruel.
I snort aloud. Who was I kidding? This was Nathan Scott- the star basketball player who fit the stereotype of being the biggest ass on the face of the earth. I barely knew the guy and I was already making up excuses for him. An image of his smile flashes in my face and I visibly cringed. It was easier that way, making up excuses and pretending not to know the truth. Lies, like the silence I was immersed in now, was easy.
I sniffle silently, panicking when I hear the café doorbell jingle. I can hear the footsteps approaching and I hurriedly wipe the tears from my face. It's not Nathan, I know it isn't but a small part of me still hopes it is. Lucas's voice rings out and my heart shatters a little more. He was right about Nathan. He was right about what happened. He was right about me. He was always so right about everything.
He's hugging me now and he's gently caressing my hair. He's so soft and caring and warm. He was so unlike Nathan who was sharp, edgy and unpredictable. Maybe that was what I liked. Nathan was different. My whole life had been comfortable and cozy. I wanted to try something new and he gave me that. It was unchartered territory, one that was wrong on so many levels but it was real.
It was real, that seemed to have mattered more than anything else.
I'm smiling now, fake of course and I can see it in Lucas's eyes that he's not satisfied with it but he lets the situation rest. I'm left in silence again. I miss Lucas's warmth. I wrap my arms around myself and stand up, cleaning up already polished areas of the café. Its useless busy work but my hands need to do something. I need to do something to keep myself sane.
I hear knocking at the door. I see him there, so handsome and gallant, so ready to save the day in his blue and white letterman jacket and heartbreakingly beautiful good looks. I'm ready to let him in and believe his deceptive words. He's speaking, his mouth is moving but I don't hear him.
I turn off the light and flip the sign around.
Karen's Café is closed. I am as well.
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