Chapter 58

Even though Remus had still been there for him in the last two years, the connection with the werewolf had never been that strong as his friendship with James.

They had known each other even long before Hogwarts and had considered themselves as brothers. Sirius had never had any brotherly feelings to his 'real' brother Regulas.

For his family he had always been the odd one, the one that you better not display to the public. He was the only one, who had not been sorted into Slytherin.

After his first day at Hogwarts, his mother had been determined to disinherit him. His father had stopped her from doing so, but not because he was overly fond of his son. He knew that he couldn't depend on Regulas to continue the family tradition. He wasn't one of the smartest and it was a fact that it was more likely Sirius who would give him an heir.

He was quite right with his assumption. Regulas managed to get himself killed by Voldemort. He would have never expected that his other son, a Gryffindor, would end in prison for serving the Dark Lord. Although quite proud of him in the end, he knew that this would extinct the noble and ancient house of Black.

His father never found out that Sirius had been falsely accused.

James and Sirius flooed to Dumbledore's office and Albus informed them that Lily was catching up with old friends, so they decided they could do the same and have a chat with their favourite werewolf.

They both had no idea where to find him so they decided to have a look at the office which normally was occupied by the DADA teacher.

James was very proud of his friend, who had had so many problems finding a job after Hogwarts. In his short time as Minister of Magic, he had tried to open the mind of the wizarding community to the problems of werewolves, but the prejudices ran too deep.

He had been very pleased to hear that the Wolfsbane potion had been discovered a few years back. If he would ever get the chance to work for the ministry again, he would try to appropriate incentives to do more researches and maybe improve the potion or finally find a cure for it.

Right before they entered the corridor that led to the DADA office, Sirius stopped short.

"Now that the Marauders are finally back together, I think we should prepare a special welcome to our friend Moony" Sirius said mischievously.

James recognized the familiar twinkle in his friend's eyes which always appeared when he was up to something.

"What exactly do you have in mind, Padfoot?"

"Oh I will let the situation inspire me"

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Lily entered the gloomy corridor that led to the dungeons. Everything looked just the same as when she was at Hogwarts. She knew that Severus was teaching potions now and she was looking forward to seeing him. However, she was forward to seeing Kimberly even more.

She wasn't exactly sure if Albus had filled her in on the news about her sudden resurrection and she didn't want to frighten her. As she moved closer to the potions labs, she heard somebody yelling furiously and it sounded like objects were crashing against walls. She moved closer and peeked through the slightly open door.

What she saw disturbed her severely.

Severus was standing in the middle of the classroom; more likely he was swaying.

BANG! One after another he was firing vials, some of them full some empty, across the room. Lily looked totally shocked at her former classmate, who was hurling profanities after every flying object.

She clearly could see tears brimming in his eyes as he went on with his destructive rampage.

Knowing that he would be terribly embarrassed if someone would see him like this, she decided to give him a fair warning.

She would get to learn everything that she needed to know about his current state in time. He always had opened up to her. Fifteen years shouldn't have changed that, she thought as she started calling in front of the door.

"Is somebody down here?"

"Who in the bloody hell is that" Snape yelled with a slur.

What did upset him so much that he resorted to firewhiskey, she thought.

Then the door was pulled open from inside and Severus appeared in front of her. His black robes where dishevelled and he smelled straight like alcohol. Holding on to the doorframe he started babbling uncontrollably. "Lil...oh Lil... What...why..how...NOOO!"

"It's ok Sev, come and have a seat. We need to talk about some things" she said calmly and grabbed his arm to steady him.

She moved him across the classroom and over to the side-entrance. "What's the password?"she asked as they arrived in front of his private chambers.

"Aegrimonia" he slurred and Lily felt his weight on her arm. She wouldn't be able to hold him for long. Panting heavily, she dragged him to the leather couch in his sitting room. "There you go. Now would you mind to inform me what put you in such a state?"

She was very happy to see her old friend, but this lack of control on his behalf seriously concerned her.

"Oh Lily... how did you get back? Or is this just the cruelest dream that ever haunted my tortured mind?"

"This is not a dream, Severus!" Lily said calmly. "Voldemort never actually killed me. The spell put me in a sort of coma and just because of a certain potion I could wake up again"

While she talked to the potion master, she conjured some coffee, strong enough to clear the drunken mind of her friend.

She handed a cup to him and he took it gratefully.

"What potion was that?" he asked her curiously.

"The Muscail potion. It's very old and only very few people know about it."

"I have heard about it. You need a lot of very powerful and rare ingredients for this particular potion."

He took a sip and grimaced "You never knew how to conjure a decent coffee, Lily" He flicked his wand at the cup and then took another sip.

"That's a lot better" he sighed.

"Now would you tell me why you're in such a state?" Lily finally asked.

"First I would like to know what took them so long to finally wake you" he retorted.

"Oh they found out about the potion a few years back already, but it took them quite long to find all the ingredients."

"And why has nobody ever informed me that you were still alive?" he now said while he was getting angrier with every minute.

Lily felt his temper rising along with his voice and was thinking about how she could wiggle out of answering his question. She knew that the truth would hurt and upset him even more than he already was. His obsidian eyes glared at her as he waited for an answer.

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James and Sirius found the office deserted and were now on their way to the library. In their point of view this was the most obvious location for Moony to be.

The door was slightly open and the two marauders peeked inside. There he was... sitting at one of the tables buried in books.

"Can you see what he's reading?" Sirius whispered.

"Give me a minute" James pointed his wand at the book and mumbled a spell. A second later the title of the book was displayed at the library wall behind Remus.

"Oh, that book" James said quietly. "I bet he's reading the chapter about werewolves again"

"He should stop with that crap. If anyone knows about werewolves, it should be him" Sirius stated.

James beckoned his friend to follow him and they crept behind a high bookshelf.

They tried to make room for each other, but the only outcome was that Sirius fell into the shelf and one of the books landed on his head.

"What a pleasant coincident" Sirius snickered as he showed the book to his friend. It was another copy of the book Remus was reading.

"Do you think we should..."

"You're reading my thoughts" James replied with a mischievous grin on his face. Sirius sneaked over to one of the work tables and grabbed a quill and ink.

James charmed the quill so that the writing was only visible for the marauders and started scribbling in their copy.

Remus was once again reading the chapters about werewolves in 'Abonimable Abnormalities in the Wizarding World and how to detect them'

He had found this book during his time as a student and since then he kept reading it whenever he felt depressed. He couldn't really explain why, but maybe because that book reminded him more than anything about the marauders.

How often had James and Sirius made fun of him for reading this book? It was full of lies about werewolves. They even had tried to encourage him to write his own book about werewolfism with the true facts.

He concentrated on the book again.

'The werewolf is a perfidious beast ... and has a terrible dress sense..."

What? Remus couldn't remember that this ever had been in the book. He looked back at the book and the last line still was there.

It's been a while since I read it the last time, so maybe I just forgot.

He continued reading.

"The werewolf rarely socializes with other beasts... but it likes large black dogs"

Here it was again! He knew for sure that this never had been mentioned in the book. Remus was forcefully shaking his head, then picked up the book and looked at it from different angles. It just looked as always.

James and Sirius were lying on the floor behind the shelf, looking curiously at their friend. They looked at each other and started giggling furiously, pressing their hands against their mouths so they wouldn't give away their position.

It was just like in old times.

Remus had calmed himself a little. The book mentioned that it was common for werewolves to go insane because of their condition, but that was all crap, right?

He returned to the book and continued reading.

"You can find them everywhere in England... they know how to tickle pears and are often seen next to Whomping Willows"

Now that was enough!

"Whoever this is... stop that nonsense immediately" Remus shouted angrily now.

Then the text changed in front of his very eyes.

"Werewolves are known to be very hairy and even in their human form they should see a barber more often"

Remus now stroked his chin. He hadn't been shaving for several days now. He just didn't feel like doing it and he always felt kind of weak and stressed after the full moon.

If he wouldn't have known it better, he would have expected James and Sirius to be the culprits, but he knew it was impossible.

James was rolling on the floor laughing by now. Fortunately they had cast a silencing charm on themselves. It was impossible for them to remain quiet.

"Can you believe he still doesn't know who's doing that?" Sirius howled in between fits of laughter. His sides were already hurting and he had no idea how much longer he could stand this.

"Maybe we have to make it more obvious then "James replied, equally out of breath.

He scribbled a last note in the book and waited for Remus' reaction.

Moony was now shaking. He wasn't sure if it was rage, fear or just plain nervousness when he recognized the text in the book changing again.

"Werewolves also seem to have a bad taste in woman. They seem to favour evil, blond Slytherins who are named after flowers"

Narcissa, Remus thought. Nobody knows about my silly crush on Narcissa Black except of..."

"SIRIUS!" he yelled. "I know you have to be here somewhere. So you better come out and face my wrath like a man"

James took the silencing charm off of them and Sirius called "Come and find me"

Remus got off from his chair and mumbled "I thought he would have learned to behave like a grown up" As he walked past the several bookshelves he wondered, I had no idea that Sirius knew how to cast that spell on the quill. That was James' speciality.

While Sirius was luring him in a certain direction, James mentioned to stay behind Remus.

"Come out now! Does Albus know that you're here? I thought you were supposed to stay in the Shrieking Shack."

Then Remus felt hands covering his eyes from behind and sighed "Come on Sirius, how old are you? Five?"

Just when the hands were removed from his eyes, Sirius stepped in front of him from behind a bookshelf.

"What are you talking about Remus." he said innocently. "I'm very disappointed my old friend"

Remus seemed to be rooted to the spot. Thousand thoughts raced through his mind. What if this was an attack and this Sirius was impostor.

Then he heard a familiar chuckle from behind him.

"Oh Moony, nothing happened to get your knickers in such a twist. Just an innocent Happy-to-see-you-joke from your old friends"

Remus spun around and stopped short.

"JAMES"

"Yes, that was my name when I woke up this morning" James chuckled.

Then all the tension, fear, frustration and depression which had been pent- up broke lose. Remus did something that nobody would have ever expected. His hand balled to a fist and connected hard with James jaw, which send him to the floor.

James stared at his furious friend disbelievingly and rubbed his jaw.

Before Sirius could do something, Remus was sitting on James, who was still lying on the floor, pinning him down.

"WHEN ...YOU...ARE...ALIVE...WHY... BY...THE...NAME... OF... MERLIN... DID...YOU...NEVER...SHOW... UP...BEFORE" he screamed on the top of his lungs, emphasising every word.

Sirius was now standing behind Remus and was trying to pull him off of James.

Then Remus directed his wrath at Sirius.

"AND YOU...YOU! YOU KNEW HE WAS ALIVE ALL ALONG AND DIDN'T SAY A SINGLE WORD" he continued equally loud.

"I think it's enough now Remus. We had no idea it would be such a shock for you" Sirius said calmly, but they all could see the tears in his eyes from holding back the laughter.

Remus moved away from James and growled "You never have an idea about anything, have you? It never occurred to you that seeing one of your best school friends, who had been dead for ages, behind you, might send me to my early grave?"

Sirius and James gave him their best puppy dog eyes and whined "Can you please forgive us for scaring poor little Moony"

That was too much for Remus. He broke out in a fit of laughter right there and then and soon the three friends were rolling on the floor laughing.

"This is unbelievable James! I always knew you were a remarkable wizard but I had no clue you could return from the dead?"

"Don't be silly, Remus. I have never been dead. Voldemort's curse sent Lily into a coma and to keep both of us safe from his followers, Albus set up a secret hideout for us at St Mungo's."

"Lily! Where is Lily?"

"Albus said that she wanted to see Kimberly. Do you have a clue where she could be?"

Remus told them that most likely she would be in the dungeons and so they went to look for her. On their way to the dungeons they filled Remus in on everything that had happened and by the time they reached the potions classroom, Remus head was spinning from all the information.

He knew that this shock had most likely cost him 5 years of his life and he was determined to get revenge for it.

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Lily knew that the truth was her only option.

"Severus, Dumbledore thought that it wasn't safe to tell you about it. Voldemort might have tried to get the information out of you. If he would have ever suspected anything... He might have killed you!"

Severus banged his fist on the table with such force that the cup fell on the floor. "This meddling old fool! I thought he trusted me! I have most of the ingredients here in my private stock! You could have been back for years ."

Lily knew that it was impossible to stop him now so she just let him continue to rant.

"I did everything in my power to keep the people in this castle safe, even when it almost cost my own life. I proved to him that I was worthy of his trust and he kept that from me!"

"We all thought it would be the best?" Lily said meekly.

"WE? How can you say that, Lily? You weren't even awake when this old clod made this decision." he said and started pacing through the room.

"James and Albus..."

"Oh yes of course...JAMES! How could I forget about the omniscient Gryffindor brat? The day when he would overcome his prejudices and ask a Slytherin for help must be the day when HELL FREEZES"

Lily knew she had to calm him before he started destroying more of his belongings or, even worse, started drinking again.

"Dear Severus, what does it matter? I'm here and I'm alright. Isn't that what counts? We can't turn back the time and dwell on what-if's. We have more important things to worry about. Voldemort has to be defeated, finally" This did the trick. Severus calmed down slightly and returned to the couch.

He took Lily's hand in his and now she could clearly see the tears in his eyes. She could figure that he still wasn't sober yet and so she conjured another cup of coffee but Severus didn't even look at it.

"Now can you finally tell me what got you in such a state?"

"Oh Lily, I have to prove my loyalty to the Dark Lord or..."

""What Severus? What did he ask of you?" Lily said anxiously.

"He ordered me to kill Dumbledore and bring Harry to him when he's attacking the school or he's going to kill my child"

"What child?" Lily said totally horrified.