STAR DREK: the Final Degeneration 1.01

Episode 1.01: ... getting in deeper (shit, that is).

Captains log, Star-date, er, um, just what date is it? I never can remember; for that matter why the (bleep) am I even typing it in? Oh, yeah, now I remember; you don't have to put the date on it, just make sure that whatever is going on to put it in the log-book. Putting the date on it just makes it look cool. Ah, well.

The thing is we have finally (after 5 days of travelling on inpulse power) reached the F-class planet and are preparing a team to go and explore it. Why on impulse power, you ask? Because according to Georgie and the instruments, we would have blown the rest of the dry-shitium crystals to pieces! Going to warp speed would have been disasterous, because then the shit would have been on everyone! And think of how much time it would have costed to clean that mess up! Any way it's time to decide who should go and who should stay behind. Logging out.

Georgie: "Captain, the dry-shitium crystals have all, but one, been used up!"

Captain: "Oh, crap! How much power do we have left, Georgie?"

Georgie (Thinks: Oh, crap! The Captain is calling me by my first name; things must look really bad to him!): "We have got enough to stay in orbit, captain. Don't forget that the crystals are only needed to power the engines of the U.S.S. Traumatized. The food replicators and other 'necessary' machines, if you catch my drift, are run by one of the other generators."

Captain (sighs with relief): "Well, that's good to hear, I suppose. Now do you think the ship could do without you for a day or two?"

Georgie: "Yes, but not much longer than that captain."

Captain: "Then get your ass to the briefing-room, ASAP! Everbody is already there and waiting for us!"

Georgie: "Why the rush, what's going on, captain?"

Captain: "Just get there, everthing will be explained then!"

Georgie swears a little at first and then says: "All right, I'm going, I'm going!"

"These are the misadventures of the crew of the U.S.S. Traumatized."

Moments later in the briefing-room:

Captain: "The ones who are going to the surface, should be those that know what we need and therefore the most competent. Since only 5 will be going down there, I would suggest that Hades, Georgie, H'Rorf, the doctor and I should be the ones to investigate, are we in agreement with this?"

Commander Hiker: "Sir, you can't be serious about this! If you go down there and something goes wrong, then the Admiralty won't be happy and neither will I! We just can't let you go, you should be up here and send your sub-ordinates instead."

Lieutenant H'Rorf: "I agree with the commander on this! The captain should stay with his ship! They don't call it the captain's ship for nothing, I would think."

Counselor D. Ploy: "Yes, this is true. While the captain has made good suggestions before, I think this time you should listen to your people."

Georgie: "I agree with you on that, but I have one question and it is this: why me?"

Doctor Lena Flush: "Yes, it seems we are all agreed that you should stay, captain. The question is who else will go along?"

Lieutenant -commander Hades: "While I am not always in agreement with the rest of the crew, I too think you should stay on board, captain. As for the rest; it is a good suggestion."

Captain: "All right, it was just a suggestion after all. As to your question Lieutenant la Fart; it's simple: you know more about dry-shitium crystals than anyone on board. And if I am not to go along with you than I would recommend that you take Hiker with you, is that o.k.?"

Everyone agrees to this and then it is time prepare for (shuttle) lift-off.

-

The crew has just left when Counselor D.Ploy gets a little queasy.

Captain: "What's wrong counselor?"

D.Ploy: "I just got the feeling that this was a bad idea, captain."

Captain: "That's just what I was thinking too, however I know that your species has a tendency to over-react."

D. Ploy: "This too, is true, unfortunately."

-

Two hours pass before the team finds a good spot to land.

Hades: "Georgie, take a look at this! It seems like the crystals are just below the surface! Only 18 feet down. This is very strange, indeed."

Georgie: "I'll tell you what's even stranger, it looks like it was covered up not to long ago! It looks man-made to me!"

Hades: "That's impossible! It could be that it was covered-up by the natives, who, I suspect, are humanoid like us."

Georgie: "True, true, but still it seems a bit odd to me. Should we inform the rest of the crew, do you think?"

Hades: "We should at least tell them that the natives are most likely to be humanoids."

Hiker enters with the rest of the team.

Hiker: "Ready to go outside, people?"

Georgie informs the crew of their discovery. The 5 get suited-up and leave the shuttle to find the crystals and repair the U.S.S. Traumatized, so that they can find the way home (wherever that is!).

As they wander across a dismal landscape towards the tell-tale signature of the dry-shitium crystals they suddenly get in close contact with the natives.

"STOP, RIGHT THERE INTRUDERS!" shouts someone from the surrounding vegetation.

"DROP YOUR WEAPONS BECAUSE YOU ARE SURROUNDED!" the voice yells.

Hades: "They, whoever they are, appear to be correct. We are indeed surrounded, although I cannot see if they are armed with this device. I suppose that's what you get when the Academy starts cutting budgets."

Commander Hiker: "I suggest we do as they say then, since they have an advantage in that."

Hades: "I was about to say the same thing, commander."

They all drop their weapons with lots of grumbling from H'Rorf.

"NOW, ALL OF YOU STEP BACK 5 PACES! "

As they do this a figure with a heavy-duty rifle steps forward and motions to his men to do the same. Soon the team from the ship is surrounded by a group of 31 Terran-like people all armed with rifles that are set to kill. Commander Hiker studies the leader and then is stunned by the revelation that he recognizes him. Georgie realizes that he has heard of this figure before and tries to speak but the leader speaks first.

"Well, well, well, I thought that they would send somebody after us but I figured that the United Federation Academy would send more people and better equipped ones too. Oh, well, I guess you can always be surprized. Robby, bind them and search for other gadgets, then we'll take them to their cell. " says the leader of the group.

End of part 2

See you next time when we reveal who these strangers are and where they came from!