Title: Obsession

Chapter: 2


Rating: PG-13

Spoilers: None.

Disclaimer: ER or anything associated with it does not belong to me.

Authors Notes at the end.

"It is freezing out here!"

"I like to think of it as being crisp."

"Crisp?" Susan gave me a look like I was going crazy. Maybe I am crazy.

"Susan, what do you think is wrong with me?"

Susan sits down on the bench next to me in the ambulance bay and looks at me quizzically.

"Abby, you're going to have to be a lot more specific than that."

"So you think there is a lot wrong with me?" I eye her suspiciously. Shouldn't she have said that there is absolutely nothing wrong with me? Isn't that what friends do to comfort each other? Some friend she is.

"No." Susan looks at me and laughs. "Well, actually yeah. But that is what I like so much about you. Your life is never boring."

"Thanks." I pretend to act insulted.

"I'm kidding."

"I know." I smile at her as reassurance and then sigh.

"What's wrong Abby? I thought you were happy now." Susan turns to face me on the bench.

"I am happy." Am I? I think I am. Hell, I don't even know anymore. I just know that something is missing.

"Why is it that Carter can dump me, return home with an instant family, and then when that fails he immediately moves on again. And here I am, still the same."

I run my fingers through my hair and shake my head. I've already told Susan more of my feelings than I wanted to. This is the first time I have voiced my thoughts on this matter. But, now that I have started, I feel like I need to finish my thought process.

"Abby you have changed a lot." Susan says trying to reassure me. I know that she is right, I have changed a lot in my life. I've become a doctor. That is huge. But that is not the part of my life that I am worried about right now.

"Susan I haven't had sex in two years!" There I've said it. Wow, saying it out loud really sounds more pathetic than I thought.

"So that is what this is all about. I wondered if you knew that they were going out."

"Going out? Ok, Susan spill out." I had no idea that Carter and Wendall were an item now. I just thought they were starting something. This is worse than I thought. Why do I even care so much?

"There isn't much to spill, Abby. The word is that they have gone out a few times, if you want more details than that, you'll have to ask Carter."

I glare at her and bite my bottom lip.

"Don't get mad at me. It's not my fault." Susan throws her hands up in the air in defense.

"I'm not mad at anybody." Although that is definitely not true. I am mad at Carter. Mad that he left me behind. Mad that he makes me jealous of him even now. Mad that I even think about him or still care.

"Look, you just need to start dating again."

"I know, I've just been so busy and there just hasn't been any time." That is the truth.

"Abby, I understand that you were busy with finishing med school, and I know how time consuming and stressful your residency is. But, you have to make time to have a life outside of County."

"That is easier said than done." I mumble under my breath. I think she hears me though, because all of a sudden her eyes light up like she has a plan.

"Listen, I know this guy, or rather Chuck knows him, but he is really hot and he is a fire fighter, his name is Jack, you should go out with him." Susan says that so quickly like she is trying to get it all out before I flat out say no. She knows me too well, because even now I am already shaking my head in the negative.

I stand up and start backing away from her with my hands up in front of me.

"No. Absolutely not. I don't do blind dates."

"Come on Abby. You really need to get out more." Susan stands up and starts walking towards me. I feel trapped so I glance around as if I'm trying to find some place to run and hide.

"I've even met him a few times before. He is really, really hot. You'll thank me for this."

"Susan, if he is so hot, and he isn't married by now, then there has to be something wrong with him."

"What about you? You're really hot and not married."

I stop backing up and laugh out loud at this. "First of all, it makes me feel really uncomfortable that you think I'm really hot." This gets a laugh out of Susan as well, "And second of all there is something wrong with me."

"Abby, you don't need to marry the guy. You just need to start dating again. Get into the swing of things."

I know she is right. I did tell myself that I would go out on a date, and it didn't matter who the guy was. So if I am going to do this, I might as well do it with someone who is supposedly really hot. If the date sucks, at least I'll have some eye candy to look at!

So I've made up my mind, I'll do it. I turn around and start heading back inside. "Come on, lets get back to work."

"Fine." Susan follows me, knowing that it is better now to press the issue.

Just as we get to the doors, I turn to face her. "Susan."

"Yeah." She stops walking and looks at me.

"I'm off at seven on Friday." I give her a half smile and then spin around and disappear into the chaos of work.

"You won't regret it. He really is hot." She yells after me.

I can just picture the smile on her face.

I can't believe I agreed to this. I'm sitting here at the admin desk, waiting for my date to pick me up. I just got off ten minutes ago and barely had time to change and fix my makeup. Now I am wondering if it is too late to slip out the door and forget this whole thing. I'm just about to do so, when I hear my name being called.

"Abby." Susan is walking up to me with what I would guess is my date for the evening. Wow. I hope that he is my date. He has got to be one of the hottest guys that I have ever seen. Seriously. Ok, my judgment may be a little off, considering that I haven't been with a guy in a really long time. But, really, he is hot.

"Hi." They catch up to me and Susan introduces us.

I reach out and shake Jack's hand. It is so strong and rough. A real firefighter. I owe Susan big for this one.

"You look really nice tonight." Jack says to me and I smile back at him.

"Thanks."

"I got these for you." He hands me a box of chocolates that he had behind his back.

I must look surprised because he continues on, "Susan told me that you hate flowers. I still wanted to get you something and the Valentines candy is in the stores now, so I hope you like chocolate."

Do I ever.

"Thank you." I say again. "You have no idea how much." He laughs and we get ready to go. As we head down the hall, I turn back to Susan and mouth, "Thank you, he is so hot."

She nods her head and looks extremely proud of herself.

"Hey, Susan." Carter walks up to her after witnessing that scene down the hall. He didn't mean to eavesdrop on them, but when he came around the corner he couldn't help but stop and witness what was going on.

"Hey." Susan spins around with a big smile on her face.

"What's up?" He asks.

"Nothing." It doesn't look like she is going to tell him anything, so he decides he is going to have to get to the point.

"Who was that with Abby?"

"Oh, just a hot date I set her up with." Susan eyes Carter suspiciously, "Why are you jealous?"

"No." He says defensively. "I was just curious."

"Curious about what?" Wendall says walking up to them and putting her arm around Carter's waist.

"Hi." He smiles down at her. "I was just telling Susan that I was curious how her cancer patient was doing."

"Oh. See you later Susan." Wendall grabs Carter's hand and they head down the hall together.

"Very interesting." Susan mumbles to herself and heads towards the lounge.

Ok, this will end up Carby, I just have to set up a few things first. Anyway, let me know if you want more. Also, I'm open to suggestions or ideas. Thanks.