(AN:: I hate school, enough said.)

Disclaimer:: um no habla ingles. Okay I do speak English, but that doesn't mean I own this.

By the way for any of you confuse readers out there. Oliver looks like Hermione and Hermione looks like Oliver. To everyone else, but Dumbledore and the Weasley twins, they think Hermione is Oliver and Oliver is Hermione. Yah with me? Okay good. So when Oliver and Hermione talk to other people, the people are going to refer to Hermione as Oliver and Oliver as Hermione. Got it? Great!

Here's and example to clarify it up better:

"Hey Hermione, don't you think Oliver has a great butt?" Ginny asked.

Oliver smirked and responded, "You think so?"

OR

"Hey Oliver, did you finally get Hermione to…" Harry began.

Hermione stopped him. "Don't even finish that."

I hope that clear a few things up for some readers, if you're still lost, feel free to ask.

Ch. 9 The Final Argument…For Now

It was the longest Saturday and Sunday ever for a certain professor and quidditch star. But Hermione and Oliver had managed to survive the weekend without killing each other. Well, with the exception of a few hexes here and there.

It also didn't help very much that Snape seemed to always walk in on them at the wrong time. At one point, Oliver had tried to put a jinx on Hermione after she had turned his favorite black sweater to a bright tacky pink color. Instead of casting the spell on her, it reflected off a mirror, hit, and made him topple over Hermione. Of course Snape walks by and in his utmost straight face he makes his lewd comments to them.

"Kinky are we now?"

That day Hermione had avoided Oliver in anyway possible, as he had done the same.

It was Sunday night, the last night before Hermione had to go out in the world and pretend to be Oliver while he stayed her and pretended to be her. Dumbledore had invite both of them for dinner with the rest of the school.

"Professor, you know our situation, we can't." Hermione stressed.

"It is indeed true that I know of your situation Miss. Granger, but think of it this way. A little practice wouldn't hurt." Professor Dumbledore responded.

"But Alb…"

"We'd love to." Oliver cut Hermione off.

If Prof. Dumbledore wasn't in the room, she would have throw a book at him, particualry the one Hagrid had them buy her third year at Hogwarts.

"Wonderful, I'll see you there." With that, Prof. Dumbledore took off.

"O.l.i.v.e.r!" Hermione enunciated every bit of his name.

"What?"

She just glared at him.

"Oh come on Hermione, you know he's right. This will be the last night we'll be together."

Just then, he walked by again. Yep, the most dreaded potions master.

"Did I just hear correctly? Are you sure you two aren't lovers?" Snape asked in his usual monotone voice.

Neither Hermione or Oliver replied, they were pretty much getting use to this . Sensing that the two weren't going to answer his question anytime soon, he stated very coyly.

"Don't take too long. Dinner will get cold." The he utter under his breath. "Not lover's my…"

"How do you put up with him everyday?" Oliver asked.

"I don't."

Oliver gave the confuse raised eyebrow look. (A/N: can't you just picture that?)

"You do." She responded cheekily.

Great Hall

Hermione and Oliver soon joined the staff at the head tables after another argument, but it was surprisingly civil for once.

"Okay, what lesson are the fifth years on?"

" Twenty-eight. How many point per goal?"

"Ten. What is the Meriweather theory?"

"It's when…when…uh, frogs fly?"

She glared at him and replied spitefully. "Lucky guess."

The two went on quizzing each for another hour or so until it was time for Hermione's departure. Dumbledore wish Hermione much luck and offered her a few lemon drops as always. Oliver and Hermione walked back to Hermione's room to get some of Oliver's things. She would be taking a late night train that Albus helped arranged to take her directly to the Puddlemere United team.

"Don't forget to water the plants." Hermione reminded him.

"Uh-huh."

"Don't forget to grade the papers." She added while trying to wrestle with the rather large duffle bag.

"Uh-huh."

"Make sure to show the third years chapter eighteen."

"Uh-huh."

She was getting frustrated by his simple "Uh-huhs" and looked over to him only to see that he was reading intently in one of those teen witch magazine she had confiscated from a Pansy Parkinson look-alike.

She set the bag down, crossed her arms and continued.

"Be sure to make the bed when you wake up."

"Uh-huh."

Hermione was beginning to get a little annoyed. "Don't forget to water the plants."

"You already said that." He replied not looking up from the magazine.

His response surprised her. He actually had been listening?

As if he read her mind. "You give me less credit then I deserve you know, and hey, is this true? Women thirty-seven ways to make your boobs look bigger without magical enhancement?"

Her eyes widen and blushed profusely. "W-What? Excuse me?!"

"Are there thirty-seven ways to make your boobs look bigger without magical enhancement? See it says it right here." He got up to show her.

"I-I don't know! I-I don't even read that stuff. W-Who cares about it anyways!"

"You mean you've never ever read this before?" he held up the magazine.

"Yes!"

"Are you sure?"

"Positive!"

"Well, you ought to."

"What are you suggesting?"

"Um…you to read it."

"Oh. Well, I don't want to."

"You sure?"

"Very."

"You don't know what you're missing."

"And just what I'm missing exactly."

"How to be a calm and gracious women that every men want."

"What?! It does not say that!"

"Sure it does."

"No it doesn't!"

"How would you know, you've never read it before unless you have."

"W-Well, how do you know it is?" She stutter. Good one 'Mione.

"Because I'm reading it." He replied cheekily.

"Fine!"

Oliver finally looked at her.

"I have read it, so what?"

"So, nothing. Just wanted you to admit you read it." He smiled.

"Wha… wait. How would you know if I read it or not?"

"Well first of all, you just told me you did and second, you really don't have a that big of a butt." He replied showing her the quiz she took in the magazine.

She turned red out of anger and embarrassment. "You're infuriating."

(A/N:: I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Sorry X infinity. I' such a procrastinator and had a writers block and had to go to school.

As always, thank you all for the reviews!

Frogs Rok: Yeah, I kinda notice he did burn himself. I know it took me way too long I'm sooooo sorry and I'll review your story ASAP and I mean it too!

Monkeystarz: Revenge is sweet, only if it doesn't backfire on you. Cute Scottish guy are very loveable, in fact I just met one and he is very loveable LoL. You know that would be totally funny if Oliver was related to that guy. I would put it past JKR if it was true!

Jelly beans beware: you changed it back! Yah! (your penname) hey where can I get a musing?

Riley: you know, I havent got a change to read that story, but eventually I will, it's on my to do list. You're reviews are always one of the best and mostly appreciated, even if it just to say, it good but could use a little something more, it helps so I know try to add a little more you know?

Fairysparkles99: Okay, I know I said this would be Oliver dress shopping and all, but I just had to add this in. But I swear on my grave the next one will be it. Okay I'm lying, cause I don't have a grave yet. But hopefully it will be next. And btw, you review made me soooo happy about the last chapter, thanks!

Reihino2003: why thank you!

Faith and Grace: Thank you! I'm glad this story made you laugh! I've actually read your story the fast lane already, it was one of the first fanfic I read and I absolutely loved it. The plot is wicked awesome and I'm just waiting for you to updated it!

Harrypottermarriedme: he really married you? Awwww… I wish I was there. LoL. Nope u havent reviewed yet, so no worries. Thanks and I'm happy you like it!

Auracle: I'm grateful you like. I try not to make it too mushy, I try to make funny as possible.

BTW! MONDAY TODAY! MTV, TRL, THE CAST FROM HARRY POTTER AND GOBLET OF FIRE WILL BE ON THE SHOW, 5PM EST. CHECK IT OUT!