Facing the Past
Chapter Five
Seth sat with his mother in the kitchen, nursing a hot cup of coffee along with his nerves. "How long did dad say they would be?" Seth asked her again.
"A couple hours, anything more and he would call" Kirsten told him, for what must have been the tenth time so far.
Seth glared at the phone for not ringing and bringing news.
This wasn't fair.
"Did dad say how bad he was?"
Kirsten looked over at her son, tiredly. "He just said.. pretty beaten up, I've told you this Seth"
Seth didn't bother replying. Chino. Ryan had gone to Chino. There was a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.
Seth remembered what he had overheard earlier that night. Couldn't get the words out of his head, mostly because he was proud. Happy.
Ryan had chosen them instead of his mom. Ryan had chosen to turn things around for himself, and not look back any longer, and Seth couldn't be happier. He had a brother now. Except… now his brother was in the hospital.
"I snuck down to talk to him earlier" Seth finally blurted out.
Kirsten looked up from her coffee mug, waiting for more of an explanation.
"I… I overheard him talking to someone… not someone, he was talking to Dawn, his mom. He was really angry at her, I think she might be back in to drugs or something" he finished.
"Seth" Kirsten said, staring at him, "What, exactly, did you over hear?"
Seth sighed, he didn't want to get Ryan in any trouble, but if his mother had anything to do with why he was in the hospital… he would.
What Cohen? You would what? Bore her to death with you incessant chatter?
"Ryan said something about having the money she needed, and then started freaking out about some guy named AJ. He told her that she had to come to Newport to get the money, because he was done risking everything he had here for her. Told her it was the last time he would ever do something like this again, then he hung up, and I left"
"Why.. why didn't you talk to him, to us?"
"I thought he might need a little cooling off time mom. He was pretty pissed, and I know Ry when he's pissed, he's not very friendly – to anyone."
Kirsten looked back down at her coffee, contemplating the situation.
"Something must have happened to make Ryan go to Chino, and I'm betting that something was Dawn…that's what I think… just thought you should know" Seth finished lamely.
"Thank you Seth –" Kirsten was cut off by the phone ringing.
Both of them stared at it for a moment, but it was in Kirsten's hand and answered before it rang twice.
"Sandy?" she asked, desperately. "How is he?"
………………………….
Sandy stood outside the car in the hospital parking lot. Ryan was inside, his head back against the seat. He hadn't said a word to Sandy since he'd stopped crying, not even to the police.
The police hadn't been so happy with his little outburst, but Sandy had managed to smooth things over, offering them his card and home number, where he or Ryan could be reached for further inquiries.
"Sandy? How is he?" Kirsten's voice came over the phone.
"He's okay… a little banged up and… well we have a lot to discuss when we get home." Sandy told her. Now wasn't the time to get in to all that had happened here tonight.
"Look, Seth told me he went to Chino for his mom… did she have something to do with this?"
Sandy swallowed the lump building in his throat. "I.. uh… lets talk about this when I get home, okay? We're just leaving the Med Centre now… so we should be there within the hour, okay?"
Silence for a moment, then a feeble, "okay"
"Love you Kirsten" Sandy told her.
"Love you too, Sandy, drive safe" then she hung up.
Sandy studied his passenger, climbing in to the car. He had a feeling this wasn't exactly the drive to clear the air with. No, the lectures could wait. Ryan came first.
Sandy headed out towards home.
…………………….
"They should be home within the hour" his mom had told him. Seth glanced at the clock. It had been about forty five minutes. They should be home soon.
His foot tapped impatiently on the tile floor, and a sudden thought struck him.
"Do I have to go to school in the morning?" Seth asked.
Kirsten rolled her eyes, "No, I think after this we can all take a day off."
"Ah, excellent, family time… very nice.. can I skip the lectures? I mean, since I wasn't part of this one?"
"Seth" Kirsten warned, then snapped to attention. The front door had opened.
"Sandy?" she called out.
"We're here" his voice came back through the hall.
"Thank god" Kirsten cried out, jumping up from the stool and dashing in to the front hall.
……………………………………
Ryan kept his head down when he heard footsteps running towards them. Staring at the floor.
Sandy was helping him limp in to the house by supporting his weight on the right, where Ryan's ankle was killing him. Just sprained, the doctor had told him. Ice and rest.
The footsteps stopped and he heard Kirsten gasp, then Seth's voice.
"Hey guy- ohmy.. what the hell?"
Ryan flinched and tried bending his head down further, but suddenly became nauseated. He bent quickly, pulling Sandy down with him and threw up on the marble floors.
Ryan wiped his mouth on the back of his right hand, then started righting himself, "I'm sorry.. I'll clean it up –"
"No you won't!" Kirsten replied haughtily, "You will get in here and-" She stopped suddenly, catching a glimpse of Ryan's face. She shot a glance at Sandy.
"What happened to you? Are you okay? " Tears slipped down her cheeks and Ryan turned away.
"It's nothing, I'm fine… I just need some bed rest and –"
"Your arm is broken.. who did this to you?" Kirsten demanded, fire sparking in her eyes.
Seth watched the whole exchange uncomfortably. Seeing Ryan like this… somewhere inside him it felt like things were tearing a part. Like he had lost a part of himself.
"Lets get settled, then talk. We need to figure out what Ryan's going to say to the police as well"
"Police?" Kirsten asked. Sandy shot her a look.
"I'll go get some paper towels and clean this up….Seth, help your father with Ryan" she ordered.
………………………………………
"So… anyone care to explain?" Kirsten spoke tersly, balanced on the edge of the sofa. Ryan was sitting back in the armchair and Seth sat on the loveseat, arms crossed looking at the floor.
"I don't really want to talk about it" Ryan finally broke his silence.
"Well you don't have a choice" Sandy told him, "We can't help if you don't tell us what you need"
"I don't need anything" Ryan sat forwards, grimacing.
"Maybe we should start with what I know?" Sandy wondered out loud.
He saw Ryan grimace, then give in, "Fine"
He looked around at them, these people who took him in, cared for him, believed in him. Seth couldn't seem to look at him… Kirsten couldn't stop looking at him.. and Sandy… Sandy just pitied him. He hated being pitied.
Ryan stared at the floor and began talking, explaining everything up to the point he called Sandy.
He spoke for nearly fifteen minutes straight, and though it didn't seem long as far as the clock was concerned, Ryan was whispering by the time he finished.
"I'm just going to go get a glass of water" Ryan added on to the end, while they depicted his story. He didn't want to be here to see the disappointment written across their faces.
"I'll get it" Seth volunteered, jumping up before Ryan could.
Ryan slowly leaned back in his chair, rubbing his thumbs on his ripped, bloodied jeans while digging his toes in to the carpet. It was a habit he'd had for a long time. Since he was a kid.
When Seth came back with a glass of water, which Ryan drank gratefully, Sandy eyed him, warily.
"You want me to tell the rest?" Sandy asked.
Ryan said nothing for a moment, just sharing a look with Sandy. "I think I'm going to go to bed, see you in the morning" he finally said.
Kirsten tried to stop him, but Sandy just called her name softly. She stopped, sitting back down, then looked up at Ryan.
"I want you to sleep in the guest room tonight. The bed's done up and everything… I just want to… in case anything.." she shot him a brief smile.
Ryan nodded and left the room. He didn't need to be there for this. The first time was bad enough.
……………………..
The living room fell silent for a moment, until they were sure Ryan had left the vicinity. "Seth, maybe you should go to bed" Sandy suggested.
Seth rolled his eyes, "Yea, right, I'm just going to stand at the top of the stairs and listen in anyways."
Sandy sighed.
"There's more?" Kirsten asked.
Sandy smiled ruefully, "There's more" he confirmed.
"While we were at the hospital, Ryan saw someone he knew… a guy named AJ-"
"That's the guy he got pissed off about.. remember mom" Seth interrupted. Both parents shot him a look and he shut up.
"Turns out, that AJ and Dawn were driving while they were drunk… they had an accident… they hit another car."
"Are they okay?" Kirsten asked.
Seth knew where this was going.
"AJ just had a few cuts and bruises. He was wearing a seatbelt… Dawn wasn't. She… died at the scene" Sandy swallowed.
Seth sat back in to the chair, taking a deep breath and letting it out through his mouth.
Kirsten looked shell shocked.
"How'd Ryan take it?" Seth finally asked, worried about Ryan. He knew the guy wouldn't take this well, wouldn't talk about it.
"He… well.. he took it like anyone would take it" Sandy finally replied.
"He.. no, he didn't.." Seth looked at his dad, "He didn't cry.." Seth was shaking his head back and forth.
Sandy's eyes said everything.
"I need to talk to him.. I need to –" Kirsten began.
"I think that… maybe Ryan should have some time alone.. he's been through a lot today… he just needs some rest."
"Seth, it's time for bed, your father and I need to talk"
Seth didn't fight back, didn't say a word. He trudged up the stairs, aware that he couldn't be feeling even half of what Ryan was feeling right now.
He knocked on the door, lightly. No reply. Again. Nothing. Seth continued on his way.
…………………….
Ryan stared at the inside of his eyelids, willing his head to stop spinning. Willing his stomach to stop entering his mouth.
He had heard whom he assumed was Seth knocking at the door, but didn't feel like talking. He ignored it and continued fighting back the waves of sleep.
He didn't deserve to sleep in peace. His mother had died tonight. She was gone, forever. No longer a part of his life. No longer a reminder of his past.
And AJ had done it. He knew, he knew deep down AJ was lying to the cops. He also knew they would be conducting an investigation in to it now. He knew… he hoped, that AJ would rot in jail.
On the other hand, if AJ was not put in jail… Ryan could think of much sweeter revenge. He knew that, no matter how strong AJ was, Ryan's anger could carry him through the fight. He would win, he could win.
Either way, justice, he supposed, would be served.
Ryan just wasn't sure at this point whether he wanted the judicial system to do it, or whether Ryan wanted a shot.