A/N: uhm, okay, so I know I've made quite a few typos, and sorry to those of you who noticed... anyways, they're fixed now. At least, I think they're fixed now.Anyways, enjoy the story guys... please R&R, it makes me happy...

Facing the Past

Chapter Six

Sandy and Kirsten sat in silence for nearly ten minutes after Seth left. Kirsten was staring at the couch, picking off little balls of fabric. Sandy just stared out the patio doors.

"So.." Kirsten finally broke the silence.

Sandy looked at her, slowly. "There's more."

Her face fell.

"I know, I know, last thing we need right now, but this is important. Ryan's history here… well it's not perfect.."

"No, but it's better.. we're not getting rid of him, Sandy"

Sandy shook his head, "No.. no, I know.. but we might not have that choice"

She waited for more of an explanation, her stomach tightening in to knots.

"Along with filing a police report, the nurse was kind enough to let me know that they also called in Child Services… there's going to be an interview some time in the near future, to see exactly how Ryan's adjusting to… well Newport"

Kirsten didn't see a problem, "So we tell them he's adjusting… and that he's doing better… we tell them that we love him Sandy!"

Sandy shrugged, "I just.. with his record.. and now this.. I'm not sure if they're going to see our side of this. They might believe that Ryan is better of serving his remaining time in Juvie, then send him off to a group home with a parole officer. They might think he needs more discipline, that we can't control him"

"But.. I mean… he listens to us Sandy! He really does, it's just that –"

Sandy reached over, taking his wife's hand and squeezed it gently, "I know Kirsten. We all love Ryan, I even think he's starting to like it here, but right now this is out of our hands… we knew that if he did something wrong he could be taken from us… he knew that too, but he still took the risk."

"Have you told him yet?"

Sandy shook his head, "I figured that… well he had enough to think about right now."

"Do you think we should?"

"I think he has the right to know.."

"It would upset him… We have the right to choose what we tell him, right? I mean, we're his parents"

"I think Ryan considers himself his own parent… probably since the age of seven."

"I wouldn't know" Kirsten admitted.

Sandy looked at her, inquisitively.

"I mean that.. well he won't talk about his past. I'd like to know more about him, what sports he played, what he did when he was a kid…"

"I think we'd all like to know that"

"But don't you know? We never talk about him Sandy, what was in that client file anyways?"

Sandy shrugged, "Not much, they don't list anything that doesn't pertain to his record, I mean, it says he was abused, and from living in Chino we know it was rough, but.. it doesn't say much else."

Kirsten sighed, "We could tell him in the morning, maybe after we get some sleep?"

Sandy nodded, "In the morning" he whispered.

…………………………..

As it turned out, morning for the Cohen household was well after lunch. Slowly they all filed in to the kitchen, stomachs rumbling.

Ryan was the last one to enter, his hair in every which direction, clothes rumpled. The bruises had started to form more so now, the healing process had begun. He raised his right hand in a gesture that was to mean 'hey'.

"Morning" they all replied at once.

"How are you feeling?" Kirsten asked, after a beat. The rest of them stared, waiting.

Ryan raised his head slightly, looking up from the floor… he shrugged.

Kirsten and Sandy shared a look.

"I made you breakfast buddy" Seth said, offering him a bowl of captain crunch. "Mom was gonna do it but.. well.."

Ryan studied him, "Seth, it's cereal"

"Best I could do on short notice, plus, Chinese should be here in like, half hour."

"Uhh.." Ryan falters, he looked down at his broken arm, thinking of the little boxes it came in."

"Oh.. Ryan I'm so sorry, I wasn't even thinking.. I can call and cancel, we'll find-"

"It's fine" Ryan interrupted, "I could just.. dump it out on a plate.. no big deal.."

Kirsten bit her lip, jumping when the phone rang.

Sandy grabbed it first, "Hello?"

"Oh, hi Dr. Kim… yes.. yes I am aware that they're both missing school today… it was a late night… in the hospital you know"

He listened for a moment, then "No, no, we're all okay, Seth will be in school tomorrow… and we'll see about Ryan… sorry for not calling..okay..bye"

Sandy looked up at Ryan, "you're favourite stalker" he shrugged, "Taken care of, she said she'd talk to both your teachers about work assignments"

Ryan nodded together with Seth, spooning in his cereal. He was starving.

The doorbell rang then, "No rest for the wicked" Sandy commented as Kirsten ran for the door.

"It's probably just the food" she remarked as sh left.

When she came back, however, she shrugged, "not food, visitors, for you two" she nodded to them, "I didn't know if you wanted any, Ryan.. so I.. I just asked them to wait a minute."

Ryan took a tally of himself, unsure whether he particularly wanted anyone to see him like this. The Cohen's reaction was bad enough.

"I'm… not sure if that's the best..thing" Ryan mumbled.

Seth shook his head, "Ryan, Ryan… you have a chance to be completely basked in attention from the people you love, and you're ignoring the opportunity!?"

Ryan glared at him. "I don't know about you, Seth, but I wouldn't want to see someone I love look like this"

Seth looked as though he'd been slapped, he turned to Kirsten, "Just send 'em in mom"

Ryan grunted and began to refuse.

"You're gonna have to see them sometime Ryan, may as well get it over with"

Ryan eyed him, then looked at Kirsten, "Whatever" he told her, going back to his cereal.

Kirsten faltered for a moment, then went to let them in.

Ryan bit his lip in anticipation, then turned to Sandy about to ask him something, when Kirsten came back in to the kitchen, followed by Marissa and Summer.

"Holy… Chino, what the hell happened to your face?" Summer was the first to speak.

"Way to play it cool" Seth shot at her.

"Shut up, Cohen" she warned.

"Right, rage blackouts…" he smiled.

"Ryan.. what.. who..?" was all Marissa could get out.

Marissa felt her insides twisting at the sight of Ryan. She felt like crying, and wished she could take away his pain.

From what she could see, there was a lot of it. His arms was broken, there was a deep gash on his head, bruises all over his face, one very blackened eye.

Ryan looked away from her, shamefully. Maybe this.. hadn't been such a great idea. Letting them in.

"Well, we know why they weren't in school now, don't we Coop, can we go shopping now?"

Marissa glared at Summer, who jut out her chin in an attempt to pout, but studied Ryan curiously. "You get hit by a truck?" she asked him.

Ryan curled up his lips, then blew out a breath, "I don't really want to.. talk about it"

"Well.. we do, right Marissa?" Summer shot her best friend a look.

Marissa shrugged, "I guess we could.. talk about it later…" then shot Ryan a look that said, 'we will be talking about this later."

"So.. we brought you guys your school work.. Dr. Kim hunted us down and asked us to… we figured we'd be stopping over anyways.."

"Did you want to stay for dinner?" Kirsten asked.

Both girls shook their head, "We actually have to get going… my dad's expecting us for dinner" Marissa replied, "But uh.. Ryan, could I swing by later? We could.. talk?"

Ryan was well aware this meant talk about what the hell happened to him, but he guessed there was no escaping it. It felt weird having to explain these types of things to people… people who cared about him. His mom.. she had never cared…

Ryan felt his eyes start to water, he quickly looked back down at his cereal, "later's fine" he replied, not looking up again until they had both gone.

"I'm going to go to my room, lay down a little, I'm… tired.. and I have schoolwork to catch up on…and I'm not hungry" he replied.

"Only one excuse needed" Seth commented as Ryan stood, emptied his bowl an left the kitchen.

"Well that was awkward" Sandy finally commented.

"Probably not as awkward as he felt" Kirsten pointed out.

……………………………..

Ryan sat at his desk, trying to look over the work for the day, but couldn't get his eyes to focus. They were blurry again.

Damn it, he was crying again. What the hell is wrong with me? He wondered.

He set his head down on the hard desk, tilting it to the side so there would be no pressure on the cut on his forehead.

And it came to him. The crash. They had hit another car. He knew how AJ was, the lucky bastard. And well, he knew how Dawn was.. but what about the people in the other car? How many had there been? Had any.. ended up like his mother?

And suddenly Ryan just had to know. He had to find out everything he could about what happened, where it happened, when, how. Who was involved. He had to know everything.

He needed the newspaper. The one in the kitchen where everyone else was.

He stood, pushing back his chair and walking across the stretch of yard to the main house. They all looked up when he entered, "I need the paper" he muttered, "School project"

"You take media?" Seth asked.

Ryan didn't reply, but grabbed the paper still bundled in a little blue bag, and headed back out of the kitchen.

Seth looked at his parents. "He doesn't take Media studies… why would he need the paper?"

Kirsten shot him a look, "Does it matter, maybe he just.. wants to get his mind off things."

"I'm not so sure" Sandy commented, "The accident would be in today's paper." He explained.

"What should we –"

"Nothing.. we can't just go and take the paper back.. let him read about it, maybe it'll help him… come to terms with the whole thing."

……………………………..

Ryan stared at the paper. He'd taken it out of it's protective wrapping, but had yet to unfold it.

He had to know.

He opened it, scanning the pages for any signs of the accident. Usually gruesome accidents were covered on the first page.

Nothing. He turned the page.

Nothing. Again.

There. It was a small column on the left hand side of page five. Apparently accidents in Chino weren't front page news in Newport.

After all, who cared about Chino?

Ryan read it through, then again. He couldn't stop staring at the article. It made it real. Until now, it was almost.. a dream. Like maybe something he could wake up from, escape from. But now here it was in black and white.

3 Dead After Fatal Collision

Three people are dead after a fatal collision in Chino last night.

The accident, police say, was caused when a vehicle swerved in to oncoming traffic late last night. Dawn Atwood, the driver at fault was D.U.I. and died at the scene. Her passenger, yet to be named, escaped with minor cuts and bruises.

Unfortunately for a family of four, they were not quite so lucky. Rae Symington, 43 and her daughter April, 3, both passed away later at Canyon Ridge Hospital in Chino.

Rae and April leave behind Phillip, husband and father, 47 as well as Josh, son and brother, 7. Occupants of both vehicles were residents in Chino.

Either family has yet to announce when their memorial services will be held, but donations can be made to The Cancer Society in memory of Rae and April by calling 1-800-ACS-2345.

………………………….

Ryan carefully ripped out the small column, placing it under his textbooks. He folded the paper back up and found himself staring at the phone.

If only it hadn't rung. If only he hadn't made them drive here. Maybe they wouldn't have been driving at all. Maybe, if he hadn't been desperately clinging to his life here in Newport his mother.. and Rae and April, would still be alive.

Ryan could feel the tears welling in his eyes.

He grabbed the phone, tossing it across the room. Hadn't he cried enough already? What the hell, he asked himself.

Maybe Dr. Kim was right. Maybe he should see a shrink. Maybe they could figure out what the hell was wrong with his head, why he was being this way.

Ryan was from Chino. You didn't.. you couldn't cry in Chino, without getting you ass kicked. You had to be strong, not some Newport wimp. He was turning in to a Newport wimp. A few more months, and he might just be like all these other kids. Partaking in water polo and stupid parties… in beach houses.

Parties you didn't have to pay for a beer.

He'd gone surfing! Was he joking, as if he belonged here, as if he could fit in, live here.

He was from Chino.

Chino kids didn't cry.

They didn't sleep in pool houses.

They didn't have parties in beach houses.

And Chino kids didn't surf.

Chino kids were tough.

Ryan was tough.

He could prove it. He would prove it.