(A/N) Okay- the final chapter! I know, I know- I killed Lucius. I'm sorry but I had to do it- I couldn't see it ending any other way. Heh heh- please don't be mad. Anyway enjoy the last chapter and please REVIEW!!!!!

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CHAPTER NINE: Abandon Thought And Let The Dream Descend

Past the point of no return,

No backward glances,

Our games of make-believe are at an end,

>>>>>>>

The room was smoky and badly lit. The few candles had almost melted away- their pale light flickering in the darkness. Perhaps the darkness did a favour to the room though- by hiding it in the shadows people couldn't see the emptiness of the room- the oppressive blankness all around.

In the centre- nearest the flickering candles was a small, circular table. The table was old, any eye could see that, and graffiti covered the badly varnished wood- messages left by all the people who had sat there in the many years past.

In the middle of the table, shiny and cold in the candlelight sat a small black gun- chilling the air round about it. Across from each other, at opposite sides of the table sat two men. One was Remus Lupin and the other was Lucius Malfoy.

Lucius had a smile on his pale face, his silver eyes alight and gently teasing, his white-gold hair falling about his shoulders like a waterfall.

Remus wore a puzzled expression, his amber eyes dull and full of confusion. "You're dead." He said.

Lucius smiled and examined his nails for a moment in the unsteady light. "I am." He said finally- meeting Remus's eyes again.

Remus frowned and brushed a stray lock of hair from his eyes. "Then….how?"

Lucius laughed playfully and shook his head- his hair moving softly, framing his face like an angel. Staring intently at Remus he held a elegant finger to his pale lips. "Ssssh." He whispered. "I want to play a game."

Remus swallowed heavily and his amber eyes flicked down to the gun and then back up again- looking nervously into the silver depths. "What…what sort of game?" he asked rather shakily.

Lucius's eyes glittered and he reached out a pale hand. Lifting the gun from the table he caressed the smooth metal almost sensually, his eyes never leaving Remus's face. The very image of demented beauty, he pressed the gun to his head. "Bang bang." He said, pulling the trigger.

Remus's breath caught in his mouth as his heart skipped a beat.

Laughing, Lucius tossed the gun across the table. "Your turn." He said.

Remus licked his lips, his mouth was suddenly dry and a bead of cold sweat had appeared on his forehead. Reaching out, he took the gun and held it to his own forehead. The metal burned like ice against his skin and, involuntarily, Remus shuddered. "What will this achieve?" he asked before pulling the trigger.

He closed his eyes, preparing for a searing pain- when none came he opened them again. At the other side of the table Lucius laughed gently. "My turn." He said.

Remus felt a tear slip down his cheek as he handed the gun to Lucius- their fingers brushing for one intense moment. "I didn't want you to die." He whispered.

Lucius smiled mysteriously- his teasing eyes both engaging and infuriating the amber eyed man. "In this world." He said. "There are winners and losers. Who are you Remus Lupin?"

Remus closed his eyes as Lucius pulled the trigger. Who was he? He didn't know anymore- he hadn't known for a long time.

Reopening his eyes he was greeted with the sight of Lucius- still there- holding the gun out to him once more.

"I'm a loser." Lucius said sadly as Remus took the gun, their fingers brushing once more. "I wasn't strong enough."

Remus smiled and pressed the gun once more to his head- the sweat had gone now and a sort of peace had overcome him. Lucius looked beautiful- he didn't think he had ever seen anyone or anything more amazing.

"You aren't a loser Remus Lupin." Lucius whispered as Remus pulled the trigger. "You're just afraid. But I don't want you to be afraid anymore."

Remus sighed and passed the gun back over. Who was he?

"I want you to win. I want you to live." A lonely tear slipped down the pale face as Lucius pressed the cool, smooth metal once again to his head- pushing it hard against his skin.

"I can't live without you." Remus said quietly, a regretful smile playing on his lips. "I can't be alone anymore."

"You won't be alone." Lucius said, his silver eyes shining, his left hand trembling where it rested on the table. "I will never leave you. And so you must live. Live for yourself- believe in life again."

"Lucius." Remus whispered fearfully, his hand reaching out for the man across the table.

"I love you." Lucius said with a smile before pulling the trigger one final time. The bullet shot from the gun and ripped through his head. Skull and brains flew everywhere, splattering Remus with blood and yet still the peaceful smile remained frozen on the lower half of his face.

His stomach reeling, Remus scrambled to his feet- sending the chair flying backwards to the floor as he did so. It hit the floor with a loud bang- the only sound now in the cavernous room- except for Remus's heartbeat which echoed loudly in his ears.

Slowly, as if the air was stiff and heavy, Remus made his way over to Lucius's body- The stench of blood filled his nose and Remus gagged. Pausing, he sank to his knees, bending over to throw up- the contents of his stomach mingling with the blood on the floor.

Raggedly- somehow short of breath he crawled over to the dead body, leaning over he stared at the tattered mess that was Lucius's face. Suddenly the pale lips moved and Remus jumped backwards in shock. "Wake up." Lucius said. "Wake up!"

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Remus's eyes opened and he sat up. Looking around him he saw the familiar setting of his room at Sirius's house. The sun streamed in gently through the half open curtains and the softly ticking clock on the bedside table read 11:30am.

Remus sighed and clutched his stomach as he remembered the dream. Closing his eyes all the images of the last few days flitted through his mind. Lucius smiling, Lucius laughing, Lucius caught in the throes of passion, and finally…..Lucius lying cold, dead to the world.

In that moment, when he had lain beside the cold marble body that had once been the man he loved, Remus had wanted to die. Now though he wasn't sure. That dream had been so real- Lucius had been so real. Lucius had wanted him to go on living; Lucius didn't want him to give up.

Who was he? The answer seemed so easy when he thought about it. Who was he? He was Remus Lupin- nothing more and nothing less.

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Severus Snape sat beside the coffin, looking in he was met by the pale, cold and dead face of his friend. He could hardly believe it- Lucius was gone; nothing could bring him back now.

Severus shivered. He felt cold and alone- who was left for him to turn to now that Lucius was gone? Who could he drown his sorrows with? Who could he trust?

For the first time in a long while Severus broke down into tears. They poured from his obsidian eyes, racking his body and freezing his soul. He was lost.

(A/N) THE END!!!!!!! Please review!!!!