Pretty Dashing watched the assembled men in the town square. They where armed with pitchforks, torches, chainsaws and other various crude weapons. The full moon reflecting off them made the weaponry seem twice as lethal. Among the peasants Pretty could spot her five brothers and father. One tough looking peasant jumped on top of a burnt stump.
"Brother peasants! Now is the Kerrek's time!"
"HUZZAH!" the men shouted back enthusiastically.
"Now is the time for us peasants to make the Kerrek's time!"
"HUZZAH!" cried the men for a second time.
"Now is the time for us peasants to make time, to make the time now for the Kerrek!"
There was awkward silence and the sound of crickets chirping in the distance. The man looked around then quickly yelled, "KILL THE KERREK!" The villagers answered in a roar of approval and raised their weapons into the air. Then, as they began marching away, they broke into the Kerrek hunting song, which is sung to the tune of "Row, Row, Row, Your Boat". Feel free to sing along.
"Kill, kill, kill the Kerrek,
All the livelong day,
Thrash him and bash and clash him and mash him,
That's the Peasantry way!"
Pretty scowled angrily as she watched the men disappear over the rim of a hill, her pigtails bobbed up and down as she hopped in annoyance. Pretty looked younger then her age. She was twelve but looked about nine. Her black hair was pulled away from her freckled covered face by pigtails. She turned to her mother who was waving after them with a handkerchief. "Mom, I never get to go on the Annual Kerrek Killing March," she complained. "It's no fair! The girls in this town don't get to do anything!"
Her mother, Patsy Rather, lowered her handkerchief in irritation. Every year she had to go through this speech with her daughter and apparently this year was no exception. Patsy spoke in a manner that made one think of someone reading a well-rehearsed story.
"Fighting is something little girls shouldn't be doing! Leave those jobs to the males. We get to stay home and cook and clean and sew—"
"I don't WANT to do those things," Pretty pouted her eyes brimming over. Patsy glanced around warily at the other peasant mothers who where looking toward them curiously. She was known for having the daughter who was obnoxious and "not a all like a lady". Patsy didn't want Pretty to make a scene.
Patsy lowered her voice. "It's just not what a lady-type does, Pretty. And what if you did become a knight? Think about our families reputation!" Pretty let her scowl deepen to a grimace. "Well I think Peasantry would be happy to have as many warriors as they can get! All the Kerreks and Jhonkas and burnination are too much for a kingdom like this."
Patsy winced. She hated when her daughter used logic. Most of the Peasantry women weren't that logical. Then again neither were the men. And it hurt Patsy's head to try and answer her daughter logically. So instead she answered, "Go inside and start boiling the chicken feed."
"But the guys just left!" whined Pretty.
"So they'll be back in an hour and a half. I don't want any more of your back talking young lady." Patsy answered with finality before walking off to talk to the neighbors.
Pretty stood alone in the middle of the town square for a moment. Then she sniffed disdainfully and turned in the opposite direction of her thatched-roof cottage. She needed time to formulate her plan. And she needed advice.
The moon was high overhead when Pretty finally reached the statue. It was old and crumbled but stood proudly over the land of Peasantry. The statue itself was a young man with short pants and a "Scalding Lake" t-shirt. His hands where placed on his hips with confidence. Pretty wished she could have some of that confidence. There was a placard under him, which read, "The Peasant Kingdom of Peasantry will forever honor Rather Dashing for coming the closest to defeating the Burninator."
Pretty sighed and sat in front of the memoriam of her ancestor. It brought back memories when she was in Peasant Grade School and would brag of her heritage. She felt a flashback coming on.
The other Peasant children were very jealous. Then one day a boy named Naldo pointed out something she never though of before.
"You know Rather Dashing's whole family was burninated. If you even are related you would probably only be his second cousin's twice removed, cousin's, distant relative's great, great, great granddaughter" Whereupon Pretty smashed in his nose, and she ran home crying hysterically.
Her mother had whirled on her father saying, "I knew this was going to happen one day! You should have just told her!" and stomped out of the room. Her father was the only source of comfort offered to her. Pretty can still remember sitting in his lap and his words as clearly as it was yesterday. "So what if you're not really blood related with Rather Dashing. Who cares? What matters is that you follow your dreams."
Sure it was very cliché and not relating to what they where talking about. But that little talk helped Pretty understand one thing. She wanted to become a knight. That was why her mother blamed the way Pretty turned out on her father.
Pretty blinked out of the memory. She was gazing at Rather Dashing's face as if waiting for him to say something.
"Well Rather, I don't really know what to do. I mean I want to become a knight and everything, but nobody will listen to me except you and Dad. What should I do?" The only sound was the chirping of crickets.
"Get a drink? That's a good idea. I know somebody that might help. I'll head over to the tavern."
She saluted her hero and walked in the direction of the tavern. She reached her destination about fifteen minutes later. It was an old yellow building that was worn down under the elements. A rickety sign hung down from the door way reading: "Ye Olde Tavern". It used to be an inn when Rather Dashing was alive.
Pretty checked her Pes-Watch. It was 9:23. She had about an hour before her mom would freak and the boys would return home.
Pushing the unstable door open she headed into the tavern.
A/N: I know it wasn't that exiting but it will be later on :) I was trying to develop Pretty Dashing's character a little more. I love reviews by the way.