The Reason For Living by Always Pure

Disclaimer: Obviously not mine. If you think that it is, contact me and we'll talk about your problems.

Author's Note: I got this idea from another fic, but I can't remember which one. It was a H/D fic where they made this potion. This is my version of what Harry sees, and the way it makes him live his life. This is my first attempt at a multi-chapter fic, and am currently working without a Beta, so critiques welcome.


"Well, well, Potter. Perhaps you think that because your potion looks the appropriate shade of orange…" Professor Snape's churlish comment was interrupted by a startled gasp from a table in front of the room. The professor stalked up to the student who dared to impose upon his weekly rant against Harry. "Foolish Gryffindors," he said in a menacingly quiet voice as he walked away.

"Foolish Gryffindors," Harry mocked softly to himself. He grinned as he saw a slight pause in Snape's step. "Oops… He heard me!" he whispered to Hermione. Hermione didn't enjoy the joke as much as Harry did. She pursed her lips in disapproval. She wouldn't even comment back to him.

Harry sighed to himself. Potions had been undeniably boring since it was just him and Hermione. Their best friend, Ron Weasley, had not been accepted into the NEWT level class. Harry suspected, or rather knew beyond a shadow of a doubt, that the only reason he was in the class was due to Professor McGonagall's interference. However, there was never any doubt that Hermione would be in the class. Even Snape himself couldn't argue with the fact that Hermione had rarely made a mistake in his class.

Without Ron there to distract him though, Harry actually was holding his own in the class, and he knew that today's potion had been brewed correctly. They were working on a Vision Vapor. Harry thought the name in itself was ridiculous. It didn't even produce a vapor; you had to drink it. He definitely didn't want any visions either. He had enough of those with Voldemort poking around in his brain. He had progressed at Occlumency, but the Dark Lord had powers that no amount of training could protect against. He still had dreams and visions regularly and dutifully reported them all to Dumbledore so that the mistakes of last year would not again be made.

The assignment today was to concoct a Vision Vapor, though, and that is what Harry dutifully did. The effects were supposed to be something that the whole class was looking forward to. The drinker of the potion would be able to glimpse 15 minutes of their future. How far into the future depended on how much was drunk. Supposedly, it was a generic result. No imperative details would be given, just things like what one would look like, feelings and a hint of emotions.

Behind him, Harry heard Padma Patil laugh. "I hope Parvati is fat!" Similar exclamations were being made, so he assumed most students had finished the potions as well.

Snape must have assumed the same. "You will now exchange potions with your partner." Harry took the vial from Hermione's hand and tipped it at her. 'Cheers' he mouthed and downed the potion.


There were excited whispers all about Harry as he came to. Hermione's eyes were shining. "Oh, Harry!" she gasped. "My hair. It was red! I looked like a Weasley! Oh I hope it was a potions accident. Surely I wouldn't do that! And I was, well, content. That's the only way to describe it. It's like I wasn't ecstatic over my life, but I wasn't depressed. It was almost as if everything was exactly right and nothing more. Does that make sense?"

Harry just raised his brows at her. "Just barely…But I wasn't listening. I think I am in shock."

"What was it? Oh no Harry! Was it bad?" Hermione was biting her lip in her concern for Harry.

"The worst, Hermione. You see," Harry whispered and then took a deep breath. "Your potion didn't work." Unfortunately for Harry and Hermione Snape was close enough to hear the comment.

"As much as I loathe admitting it, Potter, somehow I doubt that it was Ms. Granger's work that was inadequate. Five points from Gryffindor for trying to push the blame elsewhere." The unfairness of Snape's comment was too much for Hermione, but she didn't comment back to the professor.

"Harry, all you had to do was drink it. There is no way you could have botched that up." Hermione strangely sounded like she was trying to convince Harry of this fact.

"Well, I guess it is easier to believe than the other choice." Harry gave Hermione a half-hearted smile. "I just will have to make up something for essay tonight. Snape always seems to know when I do that, so it will be another D for me."

"No it won't Harry." Hermione had a determined look on her face. "Your potion worked. I'll keep some of it. I bet Ron would like to try it too."


"MY HAIR! It… I…. MY HAIR!" Ron exclaimed as he fell back onto a gold arm-chair in the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Yours too, Ron?" Harry asked. Hermione hit him with a quill.

"Oh hush, Harry. What was it, Ron? Were you…" Hermione trailed off as if she knew the answer.

Ron nodded his head. "I was Hermione. Just like Dad. I tried to, I guess keep it cut short so it wouldn't be as obvious, but I was BALD!" This was too much for Harry. He doubled over laughing.

"HARRY! That's enough. Ron feels bad enough at it is." Hermione was patting Ron's hand. "I think that it's a side effect of the potion. It makes you see your hair differently than it will be." Ron nodded, in complete agreement with Hermione.

"Yeah," he said. "That must be it. Because I was completely happy, and I know that I could never be without my h…h…" Ron's voice cracked on the last word. "Hair!"

"And yours, Harry?" Hermione inquired.

"Nothing." He answered curtly.

"You were bald too then? All right Harry! I bet we were the victim's of a Fred and George experiment. That must be it. Mine had started growing back; hadn't…"

Harry interrupted him. "No. The potion doesn't work for me."

"That doesn't make sense! Why wouldn't it work? It works for everyone else. You drunk two different ones that were brewed correctly. There is no reason for it not to work!" Hermione had already gotten a piece of parchment and a quill out of her bag. "I am going to find out why, Harry."

"Don't worry, Hermione. I'll just write something for the essay. It doesn't matter." Harry stood and walked away from Hermione's scandalized look and Ron's downtrodden expression.


"I had so hoped that after six years at this school I would find a passable essay out of all of this work. Obviously the heads of the other houses do not encourage their students the way I do mine." Several students snorted at this statement. "Only those papers given to me by the students of my own house did not make me want to weep with disgust. Some in particular seemed as if they had been written by..." Snape's voice trailed off. "Potter see me after class."

Harry groaned. Hermione gathered her things slowly. "Do you want me to wait on you outside? I mean, he'll probably…"

"No just go. If I faced Voldemort alone, I can face him." Harry smiled to show Hermione that he was kidding. "No, I'm serious, I'll be fine." He picked up his bag and walked to Snape's desk.

"Potter." Snape glared at him down his hooked nose. "Do you believe me foolish enough to accept this? You were taller, older; you still had black hair? Do you have enough intelligence in you to make something more original than that up?"

"I guess not, Professor." Harry braced himself for the points that were to be taken away. But to his surprise the professor began to speak again.

When Harry met his eyes the usual contempt was there. There was something else, though. 'Is he looking like he is regretting something?' Harry thought incredulously as Snape began to speak.

"I thought that I should tell you. The potion did work for you."

End Ch. 1